Adam nodded. “Okay, you never told me what the deal was for?”
“A year of memories.”
My apprentice pursed his lips. “Well life hasn’t been very good to you lately, right? Wouldn’t be too hard to give up the last year would it?”
“No, damn it. This year of memories with my wife.”
Adam’s eyes widened. “But you haven’t had any… Oh, crap.”
“Right.”
“What if we—” my young apprentice’s words were cut off by the diminutive man’s arrival.
“Eugene Law, it’s great to see you. I heard all about that nasty business with the spike last year. So happy you could get some value from it.”
I took a deep breath and feigned pleasure at seeing the Leprechaun again. “Good morning to you as well. What are you doing in Lacoochee?”
“I visit the Green Swamp every year. Lots of good finds around these parts—a purveyor of exquisite artifacts has to be on the lookout year round. So, are you going to introduce me to the family?”
“Uh…”
Angela sprung to attention and extended a hand to the small man. He accepted it like a prized treasure and kissed her knuckles. “And who might you be?”
Even in her advancing years, Angela could still channel a decent schoolgirl giggle. “Oh my, I’m Angela Grayson.”
“Angela, I’ve not met angels half as fair.”
Ms. Grayson blushed and fanned her face with a spare menu. “Such a charmer—oh my. Who might you be?”
“Yeah,” Kaylee said, her face the polar opposite of Angela’s. “How many people do you know here, Gene?”
With the Leprechaun’s back to me I made eye contact with Kaylee and slowly shook my head, mouthing to the Swamp Witch a single word. “No.”
“Just call me Mr. Tallow,” the Leprechaun said with a flourish before taking a moment to admire Kaylee’s staff. “I didn’t know Gene was going to be in town, nor that his wife had the same occupation.”
Kaylee started to respond, but my vigorous head shaking stayed her tongue. Angela, however, didn’t waste a second before chiming in. “Oh, that’s not his wife.”
“It isn’t?”
“That’s what he told me. It’s a shame, really, cause they look like such a good couple.”
The Leprechaun turned his attention to me. “So your wife is…”
“Right here,” I said, pointing to Kaylee. “It’s a joke! I was just having fun with Angela. Right, sweetheart?”
Kaylee’s eyes narrowed. “Uh…”
“We play that little prank all the time,” I said, getting up from my seat and stepping around to place a hand on the Swamp Witch’s shoulder. “But seriously, we are so very married—yes, completely married. We share everything.” I leaned down next to her ear; to everyone else at the table it looked like I was leaving an intimate kiss, but that wasn’t what I was doing.
“Think of me, last night—without pants.”
“What?!” she whispered, her voice barely audible, but full of righteous anger.
“At the water’s edge. Make it funny.”
“Why the hell should I—”
“Because he’s a Leprechaun and if he gets wind that I can’t come through on my deal he won’t stop at me. Do this and I’ll solve your bird problem.”
The Leprechaun tilted his head to one side, giving Kaylee a very deep once over.
“Just do it or we’re toast,” I quietly pleaded.
Kaylee placed a hand on my arm. “He’s such a kidder, but I love him.”
The Leprechaun leaned in closer, his presence picking at the edges of my mind. Those little mental fingers poked and prodded, then left as quickly as they arrived. Kaylee’s thoughts must have been far more enticing.
“Oh, ho, ho,” the small man said, placing a hand on his stomach. “My, my, you two do have fun. I don’t know why, but I always thought your wife was a brunette. No matter, I must have been mistaken.”
The waitress called from the counter. “Order up, Tally. Adam and Eve on a Raft with a spot of lemon.”
“That’ll be me,” the small man said before taking a moment to pause in front of Angela. “I’m going to be in town for a few days doing some prospecting at the finer antique establishments in north central Florida. I would be honored if you would accompany me.”
“Mom, I’m not sure that’s a good—”
“I’d love to,” Angela said, smiling wide-eyed at the inscrutable fairy. “Adam, you’ll be fine for a little while. My goodness, you’d think the boy couldn’t function on his own.”
Adam squeezed his lips together so tight that they vanished beneath his beard.
“Wonderful, my angel.” The Leprechaun turned to Adam. “I swear to you with the utmost of sincerity that no harm shall befall your mother in my company.”
“I guess it’s okay—”
“You’re darn tooting it’s okay,” Angela said, again talking over her son. “Now, Mr. Tallow, shall we adjourn to your table?” Angela said, rising from her seat and taking the hand of the much smaller man.
“Certainly. Oh, the sights you’ll see today. I guarantee it.”
“Gene…” Adam said through clenched jaws.
“Mr. Tallow, we have your word that you will return Angela Grayson to us unharmed?”
The Leprechaun ushered the older Grayson toward the counter before turning his attention back to me.
“You do, just like I have your word that you will deliver exactly what I expect when it comes due…”
Kaylee’s hand gripped mine tighter. If I could feel it, so could she. Leprechauns hold power, a lot of power, and if Mr. Tallow had wanted us gone, he could have done it with little hesitation.
“I will…”
Kaylee’s nails dug into my hand and for a moment I wondered if this was the right move.
No going back now, only forward from here on out.
“Excellent!” The little man practically leapt out of his sandals. “Well, you love birds have a wonderful day. We’ll scour the markets today, my angel, but first, breakfast.”
They’d adjourned to their own table, but Kaylee didn’t release my hand; if anything the Swamp Witch let me know just how much grip strength she had.
“I don’t know what you just made me complicit in, but I don’t like it. If you don’t get this resolved—and fast—I swear to you, Eugene Law, I will introduce you to each and every member of Stinkstone’s family.”
23
Long Distance
Adam had his mother’s car keys. I offered to drive the whole gang back to the clearing closest to the Swamp Witch’s house, but Kaylee and her son declined. I had the distinct impression she needed fresh air and a good bit of time to clear out the visuals she’d put in her head on my account.
Because of that, it was Adam and I rolling out of town in his mom’s Cadillac. Just like the other night, we couldn’t get very far down the road before the soft ground turned to muck and forced us to pull the luxury car off into a wide clearing.
I pulled the photo wheel out and held it up to the light, my gut churning at the new score. I didn’t know how it happened, but the Darkling now owned all but five squares. These remaining still frames of my life were all that stood between me and a lost reconciliation with my other half.
If he brought the mirror, then none of this matters.
I took a deep breath and tucked the paper disc back in the folds of my borrowed denim. There were plenty of things I wanted to discuss with my young apprentice, but I really didn’t know where to start. For his part, Adam appeared lost in thought as well, trying to decipher just what sort of threat the Leprechaun posed to his mother.
“You don’t think he’ll do anything to her, right?”
I shook my head. “He can’t. Fairies have rules—so many damn rules. If he said no harm would befall her, then he means it.”
Adam pursed his lips and let them vanish beneath the illustrious facial hair that adorned his face. “Right, but isn�
�t that the whole point with wee folk? They are sneaky tricksters. They screw with things.”
“You’re right, Adam. You should go track him down and demand he release your mother this instant.”
Adam’s eyes widened. “I…”
“Yeah, you wouldn’t do that, because you know you don’t stand a chance against him.”
“But what about you?”
“What about me?”
The young apprentice pointed a finger at my chest. “You work for the House now. Nigh infinite power and all, right?”
He didn’t understand—damn you, Mailstation.
“Wrong,” I said, pushing open the door. “Open the trunk.”
Adam popped the trunk release and scrambled out of the car behind me. “What do you mean wrong? Did you find a way out of the deal? Are you free?”
“No.”
“I don’t understand—”
I flung the trunk lid up and cut Adam off. “My Magick is gone.”
“What do you mean gone?”
Sigh.
“See for yourself,” I said, pulling out an old pair of paper-thin 3D glasses from the box of oddities in the trunk and slapping them against Adam’s chest. “Tell me what you see.”
Adam shook his head. “I’m not looking at you with Jerry’s Nine-Dimensional Glasses—I’d fry my brain.”
“Try again.”
“Gene?”
“It’s gone, Adam. All of it. I’m about as useful as man nipples.”
My apprentice raised the paper and plastic lens to his face slowly, his hands shaking ever so slightly. “Gene, I’m not feeling any—”
“Magick? Yeah, what part of ‘I have no Magick’ isn’t getting in your head?”
Adam placed the paper glasses to his face, his eyes closed. “If you’re joking I’m going to end up like that guy from Raiders of the Lost Ark.”
“Yep.”
“You aren’t joking?”
I started pulling items out of the box one at a time and laying them out on the plush carpeted interior. “Nope.”
I dug past an old blender and set it to the side. Mindy’s Brain Freezer whipped up frozen concoctions that could chill a person to the bone.
Temping, but not what I need.
Adam opened his eyes. “Gene… Where’s your Magick?”
“It’s with the evil bastard looking for this,” I said, holding up a simple woman’s compact with tiny sigils scratched along the edges.
Adam yanked the Nine-Dimensional glasses away from his face before risking even a glance at the nondescript plastic disc. “That’s Delia’s Darkling,” he said in hushed tones.
“I know, but it’s more than that.”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s a very long story, but this isn’t just a Darkling trap—it’s a piece of unbridled potential. With the right Magick I could use this to reunite with Evil Gene and get my life back.”
“Gene, I don’t know if I could—”
“Not you, but I appreciate the thought. No, this is far more subtle than either of us are remotely capable of—this has the Swamp Witch written all over it.”
Adam slid the glasses into his pocket. “Wait a second. If you have a Darkling… You’ve been Soul-Split?!”
I nodded.
“Holy shit, Gene. Someone Soul-Split you while you were basically a fully evolved Mega Pokemon?”
“I have no idea what that means.”
Adam slapped a hand to his face. “Someone Soul-Split Super Gene.”
“Yeah, a couple of someones, actually. Demon Hunting peanut vendors.”
Adam exhaled and placed both hands on the edge of the trunk. “So that’s why you wanted me to get out of town as fast as I could go and bring you this box.”
I nodded, dropping the malevolent compact in my pocket without a second thought. “Yes, but I also needed you to bring it here for another reason.”
“What’s that?”
“I knew the Darkling would follow you, and I need him back here.”
“You want him here? Why?”
I shook my head. “No, I need him here because I have a much bigger problem.”
“What’s that?”
“Cathy is still in Hell.”
Adam shook his head. “No she isn’t. We went over that—Cathy’s fine. I showed you the video on my phone. Besides, don’t you think we would have noticed something if she wasn’t? I mean, you may have lost your Magick, but I haven’t. She’s your daughter. I’m sure of it.”
I dug into the box and continued to place items on the floor of the trunk. My hands touched the cool silver sides of a two-slot toaster and I snapped them back. Memories of a long-forgotten morning flooded back at the barest touch of its shiny metal. The power inside that simple appliance was enough to burn down half the Green Swamp if left unchecked. I gently pushed it aside and found a small bag of at least a dozen different-sized buttons beneath it. I set them aside carefully as well.
“What are you looking for?” Adam asked.
My hands grazed a slender bronze rendering of Bastet, the Egyptian cat woman from long before a character with the same name had become popular in comic books. A feline head was perched on the bare neck and chest of a strong and capable woman. The statue’s tiny eyes were covered by a twisted plastic bag of blindfold. I breathed a quiet sigh of relief knowing we’d all be safe, provided they stayed that way. I imagined the nubile woman’s feline eyes staring up at me from beneath that twisted plastic, their chilling gaze feral and hungry. I set the statue back in the box, careful to not let the blinder slip.
“Have you been able to open a decent-sized Hellgate?” I asked, relieved to not have Bastet in my hands anymore.
My young apprentice shook his head. “No. You know that. We both tried multiple times after—”
“After I slammed the last one shut outside the Brighton 8 and trapped my daughter inside.” My stomach curled at the words.
“You didn’t have a choice. It was that or let The Defiler come through. You made a sacrifice and saved a lot of people.”
Visions of Cathy’s final moments set my heart beating faster beneath the borrowed flannel. “I abandoned my daughter.”
“You didn’t abandon her! You sent Stewart as protection. I don’t get why we’re even having this conversation. You did the unthinkable—you struck a deal with 69 Mallory Lane. Your family is safe now.”
I fished an old soup can, open on one side, out of the box. The can held a string on the other end which had been cut after only a few feet.
“Are they?” I asked, wiping some dust off a sigil embossed on the side of the can.
“Last we checked,” he said, holding up his phone. “I wasn’t going to tell you this, but Porter was in a massive car wreck and walked away with only a few bruises. The House has been true to its word—if there even is such a thing. You’ve got to drop this whole ‘Cathy is still in Hell’ talk, because it’s going to drive you crazy.”
I cleared away a small patch of dead leaves on the ground with my foot.
“Don’t do it, Gene.”
Satisfied the sand was without blemish, I began tracing the designs of an elaborate sigil in the newly blank spot.
Adam bent down next to me. “Gene, I’ve seen this before. It’s obsession. Mom got this way after Dad died—it’s not healthy. You’ve got to get past it. Your daughter is fine, your family is fine, but you aren’t. I can’t begin to know what it’s like to be Soul-Split, but I’m telling you it’s screwing with your head.”
I put the finishing touches on Marvin’s Long Line, then paused to verify all of its curving lines and connecting paths. We were about to make a very long distance call and I had no interest in paying the charges if I got the wrong party on the other end of the line.
“I need your Magick,” I said, pushing the cut string into the middle of the sigil.
“Gene,” Adam said, his voice softer. “I shouldn’t be doing this. It’s just enabling you.”
&
nbsp; I set the can on the ground outside the Long Line sigil. “You think Cathy’s fine. I think she’s still in Hell. So, if you are right, this is going to go nowhere.”
“Gene, we tried all this before, don’t you remember?”
“I know more now than I did before.”
“How could you? You don’t even have your Magick.” My apprentice was clearly torn.
“I just know. Listen, here’s the deal. You do this for me now. If I’m wrong, I’ll accept everything you say. Cathy’s safe and sound in Tampa, and I’ll drop this whole thing, but if I’m right—”
“If you’re right, I’ll do whatever it takes to help you get her back. I’m telling you though, she’s fine.”
“Do it… please.”
My apprentice sighed and placed a hand on the can. “Is there anywhere in particular I should be calling? I mean, other than the limitless expanse of eternal damnation?”
I placed a hand on top of his. “Yes.”
“Well?”
“The Tower of Unceasing Torment.”
Adam tilted his head slightly. “The what?”
“Just do it.”
Magick erupted from my apprentice’s fingers. He’d gotten a good bit stronger than I remembered, or perhaps it was just my complete lack of power, but whatever the reason, Adam wielded a good bit more juice than I’d expected.
“Connect parenthesis port six, six, six, close parenthesis.”
“Still haven’t switched to Latin?” I asked.
“Meh, this works.”
The tin can crackled and a whoosh of static flooded the clearing. “See, I told you, it’s not going to work because there’s no one there to—”
“Hello?”
My heart shattered all over again. It had been so long I was afraid I would have forgotten, but there it was, a voice that shattered my heart into a thousand tiny pieces—a frail, frightened, and familiar voice.
“Cathy?” I asked, holding my breath as the static roared again.
Please… please…
“Dad? Can you hear me?”
24
Identity Unknown
Beaten Path Page 13