My Blue

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My Blue Page 14

by Jacobs, Emery


  God, Ella, get it together. It’s only a look.

  I throw him a smile as I attempt to shake off the sudden impulse to drag him back to my bedroom, rip off our clothes, and ride him until the sun comes up. My face flushes at that thought, so I look away, hoping he can’t read my mind or see the desire in my eyes.

  “You ready to get out of here?” Leo asks.

  I drop my keys into my bag, sling it over my shoulder, and secure the home alarm system before we step out into the humid night air.

  “So, any idea where we’re going?” I ask, curiously.

  “I want to surprise you with something from our past, but first I’d like to take you to the Bait Shack.”

  I raise my eyebrows and look up at him. “That bar?” I move in closer to him and wrap my hand around his wrist. He peers down at me and gives me a half-smile, like now that he’s said it out loud, he’s not sure it’s such a good idea. “I guess you’re talking about the bar my band played at my first night back in Idlewood?” I remember Leo mentioning he’d seen me at the Bait Shack singing with my band. I think that was the last night I had my memory intact. I know what he’s thinking—if he takes me there, maybe I’ll remember something.

  “Yeah.” He shifts his body slightly to face me. Then he cups my face with his rough hands and looks into my eyes. “I thought it might be a good idea for you to just walk through the bar and the parking lot. It may help you remember since it was the last place anybody saw you before you lost your memory.”

  I rest my hands on his waist, pulling him in even closer. His eyes shift to my lips. They linger there for a few seconds before he pulls his gaze back to mine. There is so much uncertainty in the way he’s looking at me. He wants to kiss me, but he’s afraid of the consequences we’ll both face if we give in to our feelings.

  “I think stopping by the Bait Shack is a great idea,” I whisper.

  “After we leave the bar, I’ll take you somewhere we used to hang out when we were teenagers.” He leans over and kisses my forehead before pulling me in for a hug.

  I rise up on my toes and bury my nose into the crease of his neck. He smells so good—like leather and motor oil with a hint of something strong and spicy.

  He doesn’t hold me long before he releases me and steps away. I can’t help but think he initiated the hug by accident. He probably just got caught up in the moment and didn’t think about what he was doing before wrapping me up in his strong arms. It’s so easy to get sucked in by the memory of us. I have to constantly remind myself he’s not the same Leo. He’s not the boy who’s mine to love forever. He’s a man who’s treading carefully through this minefield that resembles a relationship but isn’t.

  “Can you give me a hint about where you’re taking me after the Bait Shack?”

  He winks as he tosses me a lopsided grin, and holy hell it is so sexy.

  This is the shit he does—we do. I’ll admit I’m touchier and needier than he is. I want him near me and touching me any time we’re together. Leo is a lot less hands on and more about throwing out mixed signals. He’s hot and cold. One minute, he’s smirking and flirting, giving me a false sense that there’s a possibility he can be more to me than just some guy from my past helping me to remember my present. Then the next minute, he’s running away, leaving me feeling rejected. My guess is we’re both trying to figure out just where our boundaries are. It’s awkward to say the least.

  He holds up one finger in front of my face. “One hint, and that’s it.”

  I nod and try to fight the huge smile tugging at the corners of my lips. “You know I’m really good at figuring out your hints, so don’t be upset if I ruin your surprise.” I wink and he laughs.

  “So, you think you’re pretty smart, huh?”

  “Think?” I giggle.

  He grabs my hand and squeezes it tightly. Then he plasters a mischievous grin on his scruffy, sexy-as-hell face. Leo shakes his head. “You’re right. You are smart, but there’s no way you’re gonna figure it out.”

  He looks at me, still wearing that sexy grin. I take the next few seconds to study his face. His eyes are bright, playful, and captivating. He looks happy, like the eighteen-year-old Leo I remember.

  “It was your favorite place to hang out when we were kids. When I say kids, I mean, young, like nine or ten.”

  I release his hand and tap a finger on my chin as if I’m really concentrating, trying to figure out the surprise, but truthfully, I don’t care where we go. I’m just happy he’s agreed to hang out with me, at least until Gracie gets back. He never said that’s the only reason he’s spending time with me, but I know Leo, and he’s a good guy. He’d never leave me stuck in that rental alone for weeks on end, especially after everything that’s happened over the past few days.

  “Rollerblading? You’re not taking me rollerblading, are you?” I giggle as I think about how much time we spent hanging out at the local skate park. It was one of my favorite places to go when we were teenagers, but honestly, I’d rather not go there tonight unless our plan is to eat nachos and funnel cakes.

  “Seriously?” Leo chuckles as he shakes his head. “Do you think I’d chance you hitting your head after what you’ve been through? I want to help you, Ella Blue, not give you a head injury to go along with your amnesia.”

  “Umm…I guess I didn’t think about that.”

  He taps the side of my head gently before wrapping his arms around my waist and dragging me into his body. I tilt my head back and look at his handsome face. As I stare into his eyes, I long to know what happened to us. My lips twitch a couple times before a smile finds my face. This guy makes me so damn happy, and I’m not going to let worry or any thoughts about what tomorrow might bring screw with my head.

  He looks down at me, lifting an eyebrow. “Come on, pretty girl, let’s get out of here.”

  I grab his hand as he walks with me down the sidewalk toward his car.

  Wait, his car—did I know he had a car? My mind feels a bit foggy since the screaming match I had earlier with my parents, but I thought Leo only had a truck and a motorcycle.

  I clear my mind of anything that could possibly cause me to overthink and I think back to the day at the hospital when he brought me home. I have a car, but it’s out of commission right now. He did tell me he had a car. I let out a sigh as I’m engulfed by a sense of relief. I remembered.

  I study the car for a few seconds and then look at Leo, who is standing next to me. “So, this is your car?”

  He squeezes my hand gently and smiles. “Yep. You haven’t seen it because—”

  “It was out of commission. You told me that at the hospital the day you picked me up in your brother’s truck.”

  He grins. “Oh, yeah, that’s right.”

  “What do you think?” He gestures toward the black Corvette parked in front of me. “I completely rebuilt her myself. Took me four years, but it was worth every minute.” He chuckles softly as he opens the passenger door for me.

  “She’s beautiful,” I tell him, because it’s true. Beautiful and familiar, but why? Leo didn’t have this car in high school—he had an older model truck. I’m running through every single memory I can pull from my mind, but I get nothing. Why does this Corvette look so familiar to me? Just give yourself some time, Ella. You’ll remember. I’ve got to stop trying so hard. I’m reading too much into every single encounter I’m faced with.

  “Thank you.” Leo leans in closer and places a kiss on my cheek. My heart flutters and my skin tingles, and suddenly the beautiful car parked in front of me is forgotten. I’m still so crazy about this guy and I don’t think that will ever change.

  I give him one last smile and climb inside before he shuts the door.

  20

  Leo

  I heave open the door to the Bait Shack and motion for Blue to walk inside. I follow closely behind her as we step into the bar’s large, open room. It’s dark, so it takes a few seconds for my eyes to adjust. Once I can focus, I do a quick scan of the
place. There are three or four guys I don’t recognize sitting at the bar, and Russ, one of the bartenders, is carrying in a couple cases of beer out from the cooler in the back room. He glances over and nods, and I give him a quick chin lift before my eyes move to Jenna. Her face flushes slightly as she directs her smile at me before her gaze quickly leaves me and lands on Ella.

  “Hey, Ella. I didn’t know you were still in town,” Jenna says as she steps around the bar and moves toward us.

  Okay, Jenna knows Ella Blue. That’s not weird or awkward—nope, not at all. Jenna and I have never hooked up, but there’s always been an unspoken connection between us. It’s nothing like what I have with Ella, but it’s just always been there hanging in the air between us. Right now, I’m so fucking thankful I was smart enough to never act on it.

  How does Jenna know her? Jenna’s family moved to Idlewood the summer after I graduated from high school. Jenna was a senior that year—she’s the same age as Ella—but Ella had been gone for months before Jenna’s arrival.

  Standing here in the middle of the bar with her by my side and Jenna slowly approaching us, I hold my breath and wait to see how this plays out.

  “I didn’t get a chance to talk to you after the show the other night. I wanted to tell you I thought you guys were amazing,” Jenna says, smiling at her.

  “Thank you. I’m so glad you had time to watch,” Ella tells her, speaking as if all is right in the world.

  “So how long are you in town for? Maybe we can hang out—grab a coffee or something.”

  “Yeah, that sounds like fun, and I’ll be in town for about three months.”

  My eyes ping-pong between the two beauties. Am I having some kind of out-of-body experience? Or maybe I’ve walked into an alternate reality. Ella is smiling and carrying on a conversation with Jenna like they’re old friends.

  “We’re gonna take a walk through the bar and backstage, if that’s okay?” I direct the question to Jenna.

  “Absolutely.” She nods in my direction before leaning in and giving Ella a quick hug. “It was good to see you again.”

  “You, too.” Blue pulls back from the hug.

  “See ya around, Leo,” Jenna says as she turns away from us and makes her way back to the bar.

  Ella grabs my hand and interlocks our fingers together.

  “Ready for the tour?” I ask.

  “Yep. Can’t wait.” She squeezes my hand.

  I drag her toward the back part of the room where the stage is located. It’s so fucking hard not to mention the conversation she just had with Jenna, but I don’t, at least not yet. I want Blue’s mind to be free and clear as she does her tour of the Bait Shack. If I mention Jenna and her conversation, it might trigger something completely different and fuck up my plan.

  My phone vibrates in my pocket. Dammit. I should have left it in the truck. I have a feeling it’s Luke without even pulling it from my pocket.

  “You want to walk on stage, or are you more comfortable staying down here and walking around it?” We stand next to the steps leading to the platform where she performed.

  “I think it would be better if—”

  She stops midsentence, because my phone vibrates again before it becomes a steady hum.

  “Go ahead, answer it. I’ll wait.” Ella Blue climbs the steps toward the stage, leaving me with my call.

  I pull my phone from my pocket and glance at the screen before answering.

  “Any news about Wade?” My gut twists into knots as I ask Luke the question. I run a hand through my hair and rub the back of my neck. Fuck, I wish I didn’t have such a bad feeling about my friend.

  I glance at Blue as she saunters around the large platform. She’s taking her time and touching every inch of the stage with those sexy-as-hell red boots.

  “You need to come by the house and I’ll tell you what’s going on. I don’t want to talk about it over the phone.”

  I swallow hard. “What is it? Just tell me.”

  “Hey, I gotta go. Someone’s at the door. I’ll see you later.”

  “Fuck, Luke, just tell me.” Dammit! He’s gone.

  I run my hand through my hair again. I need a fucking smoke, bad.

  “Hey, everything okay?”

  My head jerks in the direction of Ella’s voice. “Not sure. It’s Luke. He said something about a problem but wouldn’t tell me shit.” I shrug. “I don’t know what’s going on,” I lie, because I’m afraid of even entertaining the truth.

  I cram my hands in my pockets, searching for my pack of smokes but come up empty. Motherfucker. Honestly, I can’t even remember the last time I had a cigarette. I need to quit anyway. I shove my phone into my back pocket before climbing the steps leading to the stage.

  She meets me in the middle of the platform. “He wouldn’t tell you anything?” She lifts an eyebrow and scrunches her nose. Damn, she’s cute. How can she be sexy as shit one second and cute as a fucking button the next?

  “No, he wants me to stop by his place.” I’m afraid this might have to do with Wade, but I’m not in the mood to go there with Blue right now.

  “Come here.” She reaches for my arm, and I take a couple steps toward her. “You look like you need a hug.” She glances up at me and smiles before wrapping her arms around my waist, pressing her perfect body against mine. Jesus, she feels so damn good. I hold on to her tighter than I probably should and close my eyes. Fuck, I did need a hug, and without warning, all is right with the world.

  21

  Ella Blue

  The heavy night air takes my breath away as I step onto the back lot of the Bait Shack.

  “Does anything look familiar?” Leo asks while moving in closer to me.

  We just finished a walk-through of the entire bar, including the women’s restroom, a couple of dressing rooms, and a storage room. I don’t know why he felt like I needed to see the inside of the creepy, dark closet that houses God knows what, but Leo did what he promised, which was to make sure I set foot in every square inch of the building. Unfortunately, I got nothing. Not one single memory of Saturday night resurfaced.

  I shift my focus from the huge green trash bin sitting in front of the building to the dark metal door we just walked out of.

  “Don’t think about yesterday.”

  “Hmmm…”

  “Don’t think about tomorrow.”

  “Hmmm…”

  “You’re here with me now.”

  “Hmmm…”

  The lyrics of the song float into the darkness as I turn around slowly, taking in the parking lot and the barely lit street that runs behind the building. I continue to hum and sing while walking away from Leo. I inspect the surrounding area once more and shake my head.

  “Nope. Nothing looks even remotely familiar.”

  “What was that song?”

  I shift my eyes in Leo’s direction. “What song?”

  He laughs. “You’re kidding, right?”

  “No, what are you talking about?”

  “The song you were just singing. We walked through that door right there.” He points at the dark metal door before taking a few steps toward the trashcan. “You stood right here in this very spot.” He shifts his gaze from me to the ground. “Your eyes traveled across this entire parking lot as you sang and hummed and then sang some more.”

  “Oh, yeah, that was “A Way For Forever”. I love that song.”

  “A Way For Forever” was originally a poem I started writing on my eighteenth birthday. It was my first attempt at songwriting; I just didn’t know it at the time.

  “Holy fucking shit, Ella.” Leo’s voice yanks me out of my thoughts.

  “Dammit, Leo, you scared me. What is it?”

  He’s scrolling through his phone, all wide-eyed and speechless.

  I make the short trek over to him, hoping to get a glance at whatever has captivated his attention.

  “Look.” He shoves the phone in my face. “You wrote “A Way For Forever” when you were eighteen.” He g
ulps in a breath. “And it’s the song your band always closes with.”

  My gaze focuses on his phone as I read the words he just spoke, the words I already knew…but how?

  “You fucking remembered!” Leo wraps his arms around me, pulling me into his chest. My face is smooshed and my hand is trapped between us, still holding his phone. What’s worse is I’m so confused. How did I sing a song I don’t remember? Or maybe I do remember. Dr. Bryant mentioned that a lot of my life and memories would trickle back slowly. He said I wouldn’t just wake up one day and have my life restored and all my memories intact. It’s going to take time, Ella. Don’t rush it, and don’t be afraid of it, either.

  It’s only now that I’m reminded of my memory surge from earlier today, compliments of dear ole dad.

  Leo releases the tight grip he has on me and steps back. “Sorry, I hope I didn’t hurt you.” His eyes move up and down my body, looking for some kind of injury. I hate to tell him the only impairment I have, other than my lost memory, is my broken heart, because telling Leo my father had him arrested all those years ago is going to crush him and more than likely leave me alone, without him.

  “I’m fine. Just a little confused.”

  He takes his phone from me before continuing to scroll through the images on the Velvet Dolls’ website. He looks up. “I didn’t plan on mentioning this, but since you remembered the song, I guess it’s okay to bring it up.”

  “What is it?” Panic fills my chest as I wait for him to tell me whatever it is he’s been holding back.

  Leo darkens the screen of his phone before putting it in his back pocket. Then he reaches for my hands and holds them loosely in his. “When we first got here tonight…”

 

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