For Her Own Good
Page 20
She’s let down her walls for me, literally let me inside her body, and it’s enough to make a man get a swelled head. She trusts me enough to see her like this, to share her fantasies, and my God, what a fantasy it is. There’s a sharp edge to it given our history, but that’s part of what makes this fun—the risk, the taboo, the wrongness. It’s like gliding a razor along your skin—one false step and it’s not fun anymore. But this is a heart-pounding thrill and probably the most turned on I’ve ever been.
Kissing Starla and tasting her wetness in her mouth makes it so tempting to go down on her, drink directly from the source, have my face covered in her arousal, but I think not this time. Some other time when I have the patience to toy with her more and my cock isn’t going to burst.
I run my hands over her body while we kiss, kneading a breast, pinching a nipple, grabbing her buttocks, and making a fist in her hair that has her whimpering into my mouth and pressing—no, more like rocking, undulating against me. I’d thought she’d need more time given how spent she’d seemed when she came, but I’m delighted to be wrong.
Unfortunately I have to stop kissing her, but fortunately, she pouts when I do and makes a tiny mewl when she realizes she can’t chase after me because I’m pinning her to the bed with the hand I have in her hair.
“How are you feeling, little girl?”
Calling her that makes my cock throb. I thought it would be harder, but it’s not. It’s easy. Calling her little girl and saying filthy things to her comes so naturally to me it’s almost terrifying. All of it awakens a primitive part of me I wish it didn’t because I like to think of myself as a progressive feminist. Can I still if I want to infantilize the woman I love? What if she enjoys it? What if she wants it? And can I keep myself from adopting that attitude elsewhere? I think so, but I want to care for her all the time. And because I like the shy, blushing smile that steals over her face when I call her my little girl. God, she’s precious.
“Good, Daddy.”
“Not too sore, I hope? After Daddy stuffed three fingers in that pretty little pussy of yours?”
She makes a tiny peep and flushes a darker shade of pink as she shakes her head.
“Do you need a little while or are you ready for more?”
“More?”
Her eyes and mouth widen into perfect circles, and the doe eyes and the lash-batting almost do me in.
“Yes, more.”
“I don’t know if it will fit. It’s too big.”
She looks up at me, biting her lip and looking genuinely nervous. She’s very good at this, the role-playing. Makes me want to tease her, fire up the blush and stoke the heat in her cheeks. Is it turning her on even as it’s embarrassing her? I can play this game too, want to play with her.
“What’s too big?”
Her hips and shoulders shift, a sweet squirm that makes me want to groan and sink my teeth into her flesh again, suck at her skin until I leave marks on her.
“Your…your…”
“Go on. My what?”
“Your cock, Daddy.”
Fuck me. Her choked near whisper and the way there’s white all round her irises make me want to dispense with this and rut into her.
“You’re worried it’s too big, eh?”
I lean up and wrap my hand around the aforementioned cock, letting the head stick out from my fist as I stroke myself a few times. Too hard of a grip to make me come, but her gaze is pinned to the tip as though she’s expecting me to spurt come all over her at any second. Someday I will.
Someday, I’ll cover her tits and her torso in sticky white semen and then rub it into her skin, marking her. Not today. Today I want to bury myself in her to the hilt and imagine filling her cunt so full of come it spills out of her. I’m a medical professional, I ought to know better, and yet there’s something about the image that makes me burn for her, has me going up in flames and not wanting them to be put out. Set me aflame, Star, until I’m mere ashes. I’d be grateful and proud to be the conflagration you warmed your body upon.
She sinks her teeth further into her plump, pink lip and nods.
“I’d never hurt you, Star. Not really. I might spank your bottom if you’re naughty and make you whimper and cry, but I’d never give you something you can’t handle. You believe that, right? That I know what’s best for you?”
“Ooh.”
I give my dick a few more pumps while I look in her eyes, and she looks dazed, perhaps a bit stoned. Her dark eyes are glossed over and wide, pupils blown with desire, and whether she means to or not, she’s squirming underneath me, pressing her hips up as though she wants what I’m offering her; is, in fact, begging for it.
“Tell me, little girl. Say it out loud. I want to hear you. I…I need to hear you.”
Yes, I am absolutely getting off on the illusion of being in charge of her, holding her in the palms of my hands, being in control of what she gets and how much she can take, but I need my own assurances.
She’s perhaps a little too convincing at this wide-eyed innocent routine. Perhaps when I’ve gotten more used to this, used to her being this sweet, vulnerable thing I hold like a ripe peach, waiting to sink my teeth into, I won’t need her to anymore and maybe she’ll prefer that, but today I need to check.
“I know you’d never hurt me. Daddy knows best.”
Fireworks. In my brain. Colored explosions go off against a background that’s gone black, and if I’m not careful, everything will end in a smoky haze. She deserves better than that from me, so I’ll take a breath and provide it for her. Fulfill her fantasies that she’s been brave enough to ask for, and perhaps someday be worthy of everything she’s ever trusted me with.
“You’ll be good for me, then. Take everything I give you.”
“Yes, Daddy, yes.”
“You seem like you want this, actually. Like your sweet little pussy is dripping wet for me and you want me to fuck you with my big, fat cock. Look at you, your hips bucking, your eyes bright, your pert little nipples rock hard, begging to be sucked.”
Her eyes close and she moans, almost as if she’s in pain from waiting. I know how she feels. I’m going to die if I have to wait any longer.
“Ye don’t have to wait anymore. I’ll go slow at first, work my thick hard cock inside that tight cunt of yours, and when you’re ready, I’m going to fuck you, Star. Drive into you until you cry out my name. Until your legs are splayed wide open and you’re getting hammered. I’m going to absolutely pound you until you’re wrecked. That’s what I’m going to do and you’re going to love it, aren’t you, my horny little girl?”
“Yes, Daddy, please. Please. Give it to me, please, I want it."
Yes. With that resounding and enthusiastic consent, that I can do.
“Condoms, love?”
“Oh, fuck, right.”
She wrenches open a drawer and tosses a strip at me. I tear one off and rip it open so I can get suited up as quickly as possible because I can’t stand not being inside her for another second.
And then I’m in between her thighs, her pussy swollen, pink, and glistening in front of me like the Promised Land. Leaning forward and settling myself, I notch the head of my cock into her so all I have to do is push to be inside.
I can’t believe it. If anyone would’ve told me sixteen years ago I’d be doing this, I would’ve punched them in the face, kneed them in the groin, and wrung their goddamn neck. And yet here we are and there’s no place I’d rather be, nothing I’ve ever wanted more.
Leaning over her, I slip a hand behind her neck, cradle her head, and study her face. I want to remember this forever. The light in her eyes, the way her lips are parted, how she feels as she breathes beneath me. Though I can’t imagine I could ever forget—this moment is going to be seared into my brain.
“Relax for me, sweetheart. Let me inside.”
She closes her eyes, lets out a breath, and sets her hands on my biceps, her lashes fluttering as she finally gazes up at me. “Please.”
“Shh, shh. You’re all right, Star. Aren’t you? Feels good to have the head of my cock stretching your pussy, doesn’t it?” My coaxing is met by a tiny nod. “Good girl. I’m going to put more of it inside you. Real slow until you’re stuffed full. You’re going to take all of Daddy’s big fat cock like a good little girl.”
Christ. Jesus fucking Christ this is filthy as hell, but also achingly sweet, and the combination is going to do me in.
She clings to me as I press farther into her tight passage and I take my sweet time. Draw out a bit to ease my way with her moisture when I rock forward again, the whole time telling her she’s such a good girl and that she feels incredible. That I love her is on the tip of my tongue, but I can’t say that to her. Not now. When I say it, I want it to be under circumstances where she’ll never doubt it’s true, that I mean it down to the marrow of my bones—and not just with my boner. So I tell her in other ways, nuzzling her throat, kissing the junction of her jaw and her ear, murmuring sweet things, and passing the pad of my thumb across her cheek.
“Gorgeous girl, you feel like home to me. I love being inside of you.”
* * *
Starla
Home. That’s how I feel with Lowry surrounding me, penetrating me, his weight pushing me into the mattress, the thick length of his erection filling me up. Full. That’s how I feel. Not just physically either. For all that I’ve craved love, belonging, and understanding my whole life, and lusted after Lowry thinking he might be the one to give it to me, perhaps teenage Starla wasn’t so foolish.
He was 100 percent right not to have taken advantage of that and I doubt we’d be here now if he had. But we are, and having him above me, between my spread thighs, pressing into my very core with this intoxicating mix of bossy dominance, poking gently at the parts of me this has laid so very bare, and also being the sweetest, most attentive lover I’ve ever had is… Well, it’s everything I ever dreamed it would be. Right down to feeling as though he could split me in two if he weren’t so very cautious and conscientious.
“Daddy…”
God, my voice is breathy and small, almost a soft squeak.
“Yeah, sweetheart?”
“I…I’m full, Daddy. I can’t take any more.”
He pauses, levers up on his elbow and searches my face. I could say stop and he would. I could claw my way out of little Starla and be grown-goddamn-woman Starla for long enough to tell him it was too much for real. If it were. It’s not. But I want more of that cajoling, more of that easing, more of that dirty talk that came so easily to him.
I want him to…make me isn’t right. I’m not bratty. But the sweet coaxing and the assurances that Daddy knows best is enough to render me molten lava. Enough, perhaps, to make me come if he made that promise before driving his cock home with a brutal thrust.
It’s probably a good idea to have a safeword before we do this again. Will we get to do this scenario in particular again? I know I said it was a one-time thing, but god, it’s fun to play a virgin who needs to be taught the ways of sex. Hopefully Lowry will think so too.
If only I could beam my thoughts into his brain. It sometimes seemed like I could—or that, in fact, he could draw them out—when he was my doctor. And as convenient as that might be in some situations, I’m glad it’s not actually true. But that means I have to find another way to let him know I’m fine, that he doesn’t need to stop—please don’t stop—that I need more, want more of that delicious taboo persuasion. So I work the small muscles surrounding my mouth, forcing up the corner of my lips into the smallest quirk, willing him to understand so we don’t have to break the spell further.
Relief breaks over his rough features like a wave dashed against rocky cliffs—abrupt and startling. And then it’s gone, replaced by sternness.
“What did I say, Star?”
“That I’m to take everything you give me.”
“And what else?”
He tightens his grip on the back of my neck and it renders me into a quivering dollop of girl, as though he’s pressed a button that makes me limp and pliable, so very very soft and willing to hand myself over to him. To believe in him wholeheartedly.
“That Daddy knows best.”
“I do. I know you, little girl. I know what you’re capable of, I know what you can take. You are one tough cookie, and even if it makes you nervous, I think you want to take the last couple of inches of my cock. You want to feel so full you might burst, like you might get torn in half. I’m not going to be rough with you until you take it all, until you’re stuffed full, and then I’m going to fuck you so hard your tits bounce. And you’re going to love every stroke, every thrust. You’re going to make helpless little noises while I ram my cock into your tight cunt over and over and over until you come on my throbbing dick.”
I whimper because I can.
“Say it, Star. Say it while I’m fucking into you. Say it until you can’t anymore because you’re coming all over my cock and saying my name.”
He grabs my wrist that’s not pinned to my side and drags it over my head, holding it down against the mattress, and that resistance I’d put up, the one I ached for him to crumble, falls to pieces in the face of him handing me exactly what I need.
“Daddy knows best.”
“That’s it. Come on, again.”
“Daddy knows best.”
He pulls out slightly, only to press back in, farther than he’d been before, and I let out an “ooh.”
“That’s right, little girl. You can take it. Make all the noise you want, but you’re going to take every inch of Daddy’s cock.”
He draws out again, then takes one of my nipples in his mouth and sucks hard. Tightens his grip on my neck and my wrist until it almost hurts and then bites my nipple hard enough to make me cry out and buck against him. And then he presses in harder and the friction is incredible. Add in his dirty words and the feeling of being pried open and so very vulnerable, and it’s almost blinding.
“Daddy knows best.”
And there it is. The entire fat length of him is seated inside me and I’m pinned like a butterfly to a specimen board, all spread out and vulnerable. Lowry stops suckling me to lift his head and meet my gaze, the intensity of his expression pinning me even more.
“There you go. I knew you could do it, knew you could fit Daddy’s cock into that tight little pussy of yours. And now I’m going to fuck you until I spill my come inside you.”
Oh, fuck. I’ve never been particularly turned on by a man shooting his load inside me in erotica or in person. But coming from Lowry today, in this moment? It’s now the only thing I can think of, everything else has been crowded out of my brain, and the only thing I can think to beg for is, “Fill me up, Daddy. Please, fill me. Put your come in me, please.”
A groan that sounds as though it’s been ripped from his lungs escapes his lips and he dips his head, resting his forehead against mine.
“Perfect, Star, You’re perfect.”
And before I can tell him that he’s perfect right back, he lifts his head and drives into me so hard I make a sound. Ngh, maybe? Unh? Whatever it is, it’s not pretty and it’s not calculated, and I want him to make me do it again. Fuck me so hard I can’t not make a sound. And that’s what he does.
Starts driving into me over and over and over, the rhythm and the force brutal and so, so satisfying. Makes me feel helpless and used, but also respected? He believes I can take this because I’m strong. Not only that, but even though he’s rutting into me with abandon, I know he wouldn’t leave me.
Though I accused him of it and it still smarts if I think about when I felt he had abandoned me, Lowry would never do that. He’s attuned to me; my sounds, the movements of my body, my very breath. Despite seeming as though he’s lost in his own desires, his own pleasures, I ha
ve no doubt that I am first in his mind. Which is made all the clearer when he grits out, “Come on, little girl. Come for Daddy. I know you’re close. Come for me now while I’ve got my cock buried in you. I want to feel your cunt tighten around me, and then I’ll give you what you want.”
Oh. Yes. He’s deep inside me, grazing my G-spot with every thrust, and as he’s promised, he’s fucking me so hard my breasts are bouncing on my chest and it’s just the right side of degrading. I tip my hips to take him a fraction of an inch deeper and that’s when it hits me.
“Lowry, yes. God, yes. I’m coming. Lowry, god.”
It’s like one of those massive explosions where the shockwave hits you before the sound, before you see the target shatter and spread into a billion tiny little pieces. And no matter what, no matter how hard you try, no matter how long you spend, no matter what kind of space-age adhesive you might have at your disposal, it’s never going to be the same again. Rocked. Shattered. Wrecked. That’s how I feel as this climax rips through me, and I know I am forever changed.
Chapter 19
Lowry
Starla’s muscles pulse around me like a tightly squeezed fist, and I come so hard I think I might pass out. Seriously. Is it possible to shoot one’s load with such force that it breaks a condom? It’s a ridiculous thought, though I really feel I ought to check, because God. My God.
My vision’s gone spotty, there’s a low tone in my ears, and the universe seems to be spinning around me. Wouldn’t surprise me if that sex changed the gravitational pull of the earth. Hell. I thought I’d had good sex. With Maeve, the sex had been good. Yes, it had been, and I shouldn’t take away from that, shouldn’t downgrade that experience because it had been pleasurable, satisfying. It’s just that sex with Starla is something I hadn’t even conceived of as being possible.
Gasping like I’ve run a marathon, I try to catch my breath. I ought to open my eyes which I’ve screwed tight shut because they probably would’ve burst out of my head otherwise. Take stock of Starla and see if she’s okay. Yes, I’m pretty sure she had a wicked orgasm, but that’s one thing. A great thing, but only one. That was phenomenal, but also a kind of intense I wasn’t entirely expecting, and it wouldn’t surprise me if it hit her hard. How is she feeling about the things we said? The way we fucked? Did I leave bruises on her from grasping her so tightly? How is she going to feel if I did?