by Nyssa Renay
“Yes, ma’am. I let Biklish cheat off my test. I take full responsibility for my actions.”
“Just you?”
“Yes, ma’am!” I said firmly.
I stood there, waiting for her to start yelling, but she just smiled back at me. “Not only did you cheat to make sure everyone passed, but now you’re going to stand there and take the fall?”
I let out a long, heavy sigh. “Yes, ma’am.”
“As I said…well done. Dismissed.”
“Ma’am?”
“I said you’re dismissed. Unless you want me to punish you for doing what we expected you to do all along?”
“I don’t understand,” I replied, dumbfounded. “You wanted us to cheat?”
“That exam was never about whether an individual could pass or fail a written test,” she explained smugly. “It was about working together as a group to help each other through adversity. And seeing as you were ready bear the brunt of the blame, it makes me proud to know that one of my potentials not only had a hand in the solution, but was also willing to sacrifice himself for the good of the group. Well done, Vigil.” She held out her hand, offering me a congratulatory handshake.
I let out a sigh of relief and accepted it.
“Just remember, this conversation never happened. You know nothing of being discovered. Is that understood?”
I nodded in compliance. “Yes, ma’am.”
“Dismissed.”
-50-
It was the final day of demonstrations, and I’d spent the last few weeks training with Shepherd Diabelle to be ready to perform when my time came. The only problem was, I couldn’t present anything a Necra shepherd actually did in their day to day lives. I wouldn’t be able to show the class how to perform a Call to Death or navigate the realm between the living and the dead.
Eeliyah had experienced a similar situation. She was only able to train us how to do a minor healing spell on a simple life form, because to perform even the smallest healing spell on a complex life form took years of study. One wrong move, and an ordinary shepherd would do more harm than good.
So, much like Eeliyah, I was forced to teach the class a simpler, more mundane ability of Necra sect; the ability to summon a sticky, tar-like sludge. I had no idea what a shepherd would possibly use this spell for, but as with most things at the academy, its true use wouldn’t be revealed until the powers that be thought the time was right.
From the amphitheater, the class was loaded onto a shuttle and taken to the entrance of the Sanctified Mines. Even though I wanted nothing more than to go sit with Eeliyah to distract myself from being nervous, Shepherd Diabelle made me sit next to her to stay focused on the task at hand.
As I exited the shuttle, I noticed Shepherd Graldo watching us from the shadows near the mouth of the cave. Our demonstration was to take place on the side the mountain where the cliff face met the ground. As luck would have it, I wasn’t the only potential giving a presentation that day. Both Shepherd Tyrechi of the Terrene sect and Shepherd Nolbana of the Settle sect joined Shepherd Diabelle to explain what was about to take place.
“Today,” Shepherd Tyrechi began, “you will not only learn one new ability using Wraith, but three. While this will be the last of the initial presentations, it is also the first of the group sect exercises. As shepherds, you’ll often need to choose what spell to use, depending on your situation. Sometimes, you’ll only have a matter of seconds to decide, and you need to learn how to make swift, spur-of-the-moment choices. To demonstrate, Gella and Rollan will use their abilities to pull boulders down from the cliff face of the mountain while Vigil and Wellis will use their sect abilities to stop them from reaching the ground. Everyone ready?”
“Yes, sir!” we replied.
I took a deep breath, trying to steady my nerves as I positioned myself and waited for the boulders to start tumbling toward me.
“Statchi avarella!” Gella and Rollan called out simultaneously. Suddenly, two large rocks broke free from the mountainside; one heading toward me, and the other toward Wellis.
I scanned the path between me and my boulder, searching for the most effective spot for my spell. As the rock tumbled along, I searched my mind for the right words to speak. I felt the rest of my senses begin to numb as the words emerged from somewhere deep in my clouded memories.
“Decrupto polania!” I shouted, thrusting out my hand as the words rolled off my tongue. A wave of black sludge erupted from the spot I’d picked on the mountainside, quickly pooling and latching onto the boulder as it rolled through. Within seconds, the sticky substance had attached itself and slowed it down, eventually stopping a good twenty feet above the ground. While my demonstration had gone according to plan, Wellis had not been as lucky.
He’d casted a net of thorny vines between two large rock formations on either side of the tumbling boulder, but it wasn’t thick enough. The stone easily broke through the net, and the class gasped as they were now directly in its path of destruction.
“Wexraria e’ swarano!” Shepherd Tyrechi howled, sending a large white ball of energy at the rapidly advancing boulder. The rock shattered into a thousand smaller pieces, showering us with a cloud of tiny pebbles.
Fortunately, no one was hurt, but I could tell Wellis was mortified at his failure. Shepherd Tyrechi wasted no time in turning the mishap into a teachable moment to drive home his earlier point.
“See?” Tyrechi shouted. “A perfect example of what can happen if you make the wrong decision. Sometimes the environment is just as important a factor as the spell you use. The flat, solid surface worked better with Vigil’s spell because his sludge could spread out and latch onto the boulder as it rolled through, whereas the net approach created a single point of impact and could not contain the stone. Had there been multiple, smaller stones or free-falling rocks with no surface nearby to attach a sludge spell to, the net spell would’ve been the smarter choice. Make sense?”
Everyone nodded, and I saw Wellis exhale a small sigh of relief at the same time I did. We’d made it through together.
If there was one thing over everything else the academy had taught me about becoming a shepherd, it was that there was no time to dwell on your past mistakes. It was always better to accept it, learn from it, and then move on as quickly as possible. If you didn’t, your anxiety and resentment would get the better of you, making you your own worst obstacle. It was a lesson I wish I’d learned before going to the Home for Blessed Children or the night of the prince’s royal dinner. My life might have gone much smoother had I known all this from the start, but that’s not how things work—for anyone.
After a few more months of practice, everything I’d learned from the presentations started to become second nature. My reaction time and decision-making skills rapidly improved. It wasn’t long before I’d achieved a strong enough foundation in Wraith to add on more advanced spells to my repertoire.
I started to enjoy being part of the Shepherd Academy. Between my unofficial managerial kitchen duties and finally getting to use Wraith in practice, my life began to have a purpose. I was becoming the potential the system was designed to create.
Things were progressing forward and going great, for a change. All the tragedy and pain I’d suffered had led me to this point. It felt as if everything, both good and bad, had happened for a reason. I began to feel at home. I was beginning to let go of the past and believe in the traditions and customs of the academy, no matter how strange they’d seemed in the beginning. My faith in the king and the Church was unyielding for the first time since my mother and sister died.
I was truly happy for once, but as usual, my levels of happiness and trust were about to crumble yet again.
-51-
Once we’d all become proficient enough at both the individual and group sect exercises, the shepherds introduced us to a more rigorous set of challenges known simply as the Trial. Under the training facilities at the academy, there was a large ring o
f various complex, elaborate, and often dangerous obstacles. In the center of it all sat a tall platform, where the shepherd in charge and the rest of the class could observe the progress of each potential.
I hated this place. Being so far underground, the air was musty and stagnant, making it difficult to breathe, especially when performing anything that required physical exertion. It took the class a little over a month before everyone was proficient enough to make it all the way around the ring in one try.
As I gathered with the other potentials waiting to start the practice runs for the afternoon, I noticed all the ceiling lights had been dimmed. Making it all the way around was difficult enough with the lights on, but having to run the course using only the light from the flaming torches that hung randomly on the walls inside the course seemed impossible. But what concerned me more than anything in that moment was that I didn’t see either of the twins.
“Biklish,” I called out, walking over toward him. “Have you seen Eeliyah or Abellie?”
“No.” He looked around, puzzled. “They’re probably still at lunch,” he replied dismissively before focusing his attention back onto the small stack of notecards in his hands.
Then, Abellie walked up the stairs and onto the platform. She looked incredibly anxious.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” I asked as I met up with her near the back of the platform.
“Something’s up.”
“What do you mean? Where’s Eeliyah?”
“That’s just it. I don’t know.” She let out a worried sigh. “We were eating lunch with Brio sect today and then Shepherd Scullery bolted into the chow hall. He told them all to stop eating and head to the medical ward.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know!” she snapped. “Why do you think I’m all freaked out?”
“I’m sure she’s okay,” I offered, trying to convince myself as well.
Just then, Shepherd Batopho, the leader of the Palpit sect, appeared on the platform. “All right! Let’s get this started!”
The class gathered in a half circle around Batopho as he made his way to the center of the platform. I stayed close to Abellie, hoping to talk more as soon as we could.
“As you can see,” Batopho began, pointing at the ceiling, “we’ve reduced the lighting to make it more difficult for you to see what you’re doing. This will force you to rely more on your instincts, which, in turn, will quicken your reflexes. Not only that, but if you look around, you’ll see we’ve installed special mirrors above the entire course.”
The blackbrass frames of the mirrors made it tough to spot them against the shadowy corners of the ceiling without straining my eyes, but as I raised my hand to block out a nearby light, I saw what he was talking about.
“The mirrors will be used to amplify and project one of the complementary spells a Palpit shepherd has in his or her arsenal: the power to inflict fear upon others.” Batopho smiled slyly. “This ability can be incredibly useful, depending on the situation. For example, let’s say a shepherd was navigating through the wilderness and needed to deter a pack of savage animals from attacking, or maybe a crowd of people becomes hostile or out of control. That shepherd could cast a wave of fear or anxiety, even paranoia to make the aggressors back down and rethink their actions. For today, Biklish will attempt to break your concentration as you navigate the course, and you’ll need to focus your mind to overcome whatever distraction he presents to you. Got it?”
“Yes, sir!” we replied in unison.
“Okay, first up…let’s go with…Vigil!” Shepherd Batopho announced.
I groaned to myself, feeling unlucky to be the first guinea pig for this revamped exercise. As I made my way toward the stairs down to the starting area of the course, a slight smile crept across his face, making me instantly nervous.
“Good luck, Vigil!” Abellie cheered as I stood before the heavy double doors to the first obstacle, waiting to begin.
“Thanks,” I muttered, looking up at her and the rest of the class watching me from above. Almost immediately, I noticed the expression on Biklish’s face had turned sour upon hearing Abellie pledge her support for me instead of him.
Oh, shit, I thought to myself. This is not going to go well.
“Ready?” Batopho asked, even though I knew he didn’t really care if I was.
“Yes, sir.”
“Begin!” Batopho commanded.
I pushed the double doors open and rushed through, mentally preparing myself for the first section of the Trial, the live fire exercise. The heavy doors slammed shut, sending an echo down the shadowy hallway before me. The matte black walls had a faint orange glow from the burning torches on either side of me. I took a few steps forward and spoke in Wraith to create a small, flaming sphere with flames from one of the torches. It hovered in front of me.
I navigated the hallway step by step, watching for the first target to appear, as Biklish’s initial wave of fear came over me. It started out with a dart of nervousness that tightened my chest and quickened my breathing. I felt the blood rush from my hands and my fingers begin to tingle. The sound of my breathing became louder and faster in my ears as I tried to process my panic.
Suddenly, the hallway came alive as wooden bull’s eye cutouts sprang from the walls at different distances and from different directions. I quickly flicked my fingers and released fiery bullets from the sphere in every direction, completely missing everything I aimed for.
“Back up and do it again!” Shepherd Batopho shouted angrily.
I let go of my sphere, watching it quickly dissipate as I headed back to the start.
“Ready?” Batopho barked.
“Yes, sir.”
“Begin!” he ordered.
Before I could even create my flaming sphere, another wave of fear crashed over me. I pulled the ball of fire toward me and walked tentatively down the hallway. No matter how hard I tried to concentrate, all I could focus on was the sound of my own panicked breath and rapidly increasing heartbeat.
When the targets darted for the second time, I managed to hit half of them, but just barely.
“Better! Keep moving…and don’t lose your focus!”
I nodded, feeling the beads of sweat pooling on the sides of my face. Suddenly, all the torches in the hallway went out. Except for the dying light from what was left of my fiery sphere, I was surrounded by complete darkness. My hands trembled, and I took a long deep breath in a vain attempt to steady my nerves.
My mind began to play tricks on me. I swore I heard footsteps creeping up behind me in the blackness. They were loud and heavy, like the blackbrass boots of the marching royal guards. I remembered hearing that same sound when they came into my house when I was six, and that memory alone caused my whole body to shudder.
I spun around and shouted as loud as I could against the darkness. “Flui’veri sulupta!” A blazing flash of fire exploded before me as my sphere spiraled down the dark hallway I’d just traveled. Once it had illuminated the path, I could clearly see I was not being followed, but it still felt like I wasn’t alone.
“Stop being so damn skittish and concentrate!” Batopho growled from above me.
“Yes, sir!” I replied firmly, pushing myself forward with all the mental courage I could muster.
The moment I wandered into the next area, an even stronger wave of panic hit me, and I fell to my knees. I couldn’t think straight. I could barely breathe. Then, I heard the heavy footsteps again in the darkness, getting louder and louder as they approached. My senses screamed that I was surrounded, even though I knew I was alone. I gritted my teeth and willed myself to my feet, struggling to walk forward, until suddenly, a trap door opened beneath me, sending me spiraling downward.
-52-
I was falling fast down a stone well, and the horrible freefall aggravated my fear so badly that I screamed out in absolute terror. Even though I’d been through this part of the Trial many times before, I felt just as frigh
tened as I did my first time.
The speed of my fall was rapidly sucking the air from my lungs. “Ereavi…e’poluptati,” I gasped, finding it painfully hard to breathe, but those few words were enough. A powerful wind shot from my hands, filling the tunnel below me with enough force to slow my fall, but it wasn’t enough to stop me completely. My panic and fear made my reaction time much slower than normal, and I hit the water at the bottom of the well with a velocity so strong that it felt like I’d crashed through a concrete wall. I sank through the murky water until my feet touched the bottom, and then I pushed off, launching myself upward until I broke the surface, coughing and choking and fighting for air.
Despite being farther away from mirrors than I had been before I fell, my fear was surprisingly just as intense. Biklish’s mocking laughter echoed in my head. It was so loud and filled my ears with stabbing pains, but I had to keep going. Flailing my arms through the water, I somehow managed to find the cold bars of the escape ladder. I climbed back up, squeezing the rungs as hard as I could while trying to focus on each step. It was all I could do to cope. Once I reached the top of the well, Biklish’s laughter dissolved into a deep, menacing rhythm that shook my chest with its reverberations and spread throughout my entire body. My mouth was dry, and my head was throbbing as I forced myself to move forward to the next obstacle.
Usually, this section of the Trial was devoted to the practice of deflecting stone boulders as they tumbled down from slanted walls on either side, but today it was set up as a long, serpentine tunnel of rock with an opening so narrow I had to turn sideways to fit through it. Although I’d never had a problem with confined spaces, in that moment, I felt the creeping sensation of claustrophobia overcome my body. I scrambled in a panic to get through the tunnel, scraping my chest and back as I moved along. At one point, I got stuck.