into the opened organ, through the fermenting mass of stomach contents,
and in a flash all my troubles dissolved. Along the floor of the rumen
apples and pears were spread in layers, Some of them bitten but most of
them whole and intact. Bovines take most of their food in big swallows
and chew it over later at their leisure, but no animal could make cud
out of this lot.
I looked up happily.
"It's just as I thought. He's full of fruit."
"Hhrraaagh!" replied Mr Sow den. Coughs come in various forms but
this one Was tremendous and fundamental, star ting at the soles of his
hob-nailed boots and exploding right in my face. I hadn't realised how
vulnerable I was with the farmer leaning over the calf's neck, his head
a few inches from mine.
"Hhrraaag he repeated, and a second shower of virus laden moisture
struck me. Apparent Mr Sow den either didn't know or didn't care about
droplet infection, but with my hands inside my patient there was
nothing I could do about it.
Instinctively I turned my face a little in the other direction.
"Whoosh!" went George. It was a sneeze rather than a cough, but it
sent similar deadly spray against my other cheek. I realised there was
no escape.
was hopelessly trapped between the two of them.
But as I say, my morale had received a boost. Eagerly I scooped out
are handfuls of the offending fruit and within minutes the floor of the
barn w littered with Bramley's seedlings and Conference pears.
"Enough here to start a shop," I laughed.
"Hhrraaagh!" responded Mr Sow den.
"Whooosh!" added George, not to be outdone.
When I had sent the last apple and pear rolling into the darkness I
scrubbed' up again and started to stitch. This is the longest and most
wearisome part a rumenotomy. The excitement of diagnosis and discovery
is over and it is good time for idle chat, funny stories, anything to
pass the time.
But there in the circle of yellow light with the wind whirling round my
feet from the surrounding gloom and occasional icy trickles of rain
running down my back I was singularly short of gossip, and my
companions, sunk in the' respective miseries, were in no mood for
badinage.
I was half way down the skin sutures when a tickle mounted at the back
my nose and I had to stop and stand upright.
"Ah ah ashooo!" I rubbed my forearm along my nose.
"He's star tin'," murmured George with mournful satisfaction.
"Aye, 'e's off," agreed Mr Sow den, brightening visibly.
I was not greatly worried. I had long since come to the conclusion
that n cause was lost. The long session of freezing in my shirt
sleeves would have down it without the incessant germ; bombardment from
either side. I was resigned my fate and besides, when I inserted the
last stitch and helped the calf down from the table I felt a deep
thrill of satisfaction. That horrible groan h; vanished and the little
animal was loo king around him as though he had be!
away for a while. He wasn't cheerful yet, but I knew his pain had gone
and that he would live. ~ "Bed him up well, Mr Sow den." I started to
wash my instruments in the bucket.
"And put a couple of sacks round him to keep him warm. I'll call in
fortnight to take out the stitches."
That fortnight seemed to last a long time. My cold, as I had confident
expected, developed into a raging holocaust which settled down into the
inevitable brown chi tis with an accompanying cough which rivalled Mr
Sow den's.
Mr Sow den was never an ebullient man but I expected him to look a
little happier when I removed the stitches. Because the calf was
bright and lively a' I had a chase him round his pen to catch him.
~e the fire in my chest I had that airy feeling of success.
said expansively.
"He's done very well. He'll make a good bullo ",~shrugged
gloomily.
"Aye, reckon 'e will. But there was no no Go O9 ~ on."
my ."s.,:. en talkie' to one or two folk about t'job and they all
said; to foOIt . f ~G~ ~up like that. Ah should just 'ave given 'im a
pint of oil 1~ after fifteen minutes. JI '~r Sow den, I assure you .
. .
~And now ah'll have a big bill to pay." He dug his hands deep into his
pockets.
"Believe me, it was worth it."
~Nay, nay, never." He started to walk away, then looked over his
shoulder.
~It wouldtve been better if you 'adn't come."
I had done three circuits with FO Wood ham and on this third one he had
kept fairly quiet. Obviously I was doing all right now and I could
start enjoying myself again Flying was lovely.
The voice came over the intercom again.
"I'm going to let you land her yourself this time. I've told you how
to do it. Right, you've got her."
"I've got her," I replied. He had indeed told me how to do it again
and again - and I was sure I would have no trouble.
As we lost height the tops of the trees appeared, then the grass of the
airfield came up to meet us. It was the moment of truth. Carefully I
eased the stick back, then at what I thought was the right moment I
slammed it back against my stomach. Maybe a bit soon because we
bounced a couple of times and that made me forget to seesaw the rudder
bar so that we careered from side to side over the turf before coming
to a halt.
With the engine stilled I took a deep breath. That was my first
landing and it hadn't been bad. In fact I had got better and better
all the time and the conviction was growing in me that my instructor
must have been impressed with my initial showing. We climbed out and
after walking a few steps in silence FO Wood ham halted and turned to
me.
"What's your name?" he asked.
Ah yes, here was the proof. He knew I had done well. He was
interested in me.
"Herriot, sir," I replied smartly.
For a few moments he gave me a level stare.
"Well, Herriot," he murmured, 'that was bloody awful."
He turned and left me. I gazed down at my feet in their big sheepskin
boots.
Yes, the uniform was different, but things hadn't changed all that
much.
Chapter Two "Takes all kinds, doesn't it, chum?"
The airman grinned at me across the flight hut table. We had been
listening to a monologue from a third man who had just left us after
tell ing us what he intended to do after gaining his wings. The
impression he left was that he was almost going to win the war on his
own.
There were certainly all kinds in the RAF and this 'line shooting' was
a common phenomenon when different types were thrown together.
There are all kinds of animals, too. Many people think my farm
patients are all the same, but cows, pigs, sheep and horses can be
moody, placid, vicious, docile, spiteful, loving.
~.
~." `.
There was one particular pig called Gertrude, but before I come to her
I must start with Mr Barge.
Nowadays the young men
from the pharmaceutical companies who call
veterinary surgeons are referred to as 'reps', but nobody would have
dream of applying such a term to Mr Barge. He was definitely a
'representative, Car gill and Sons, Manufacturers of Fine Chemicals
since 1850, and he was old that he might have been in on the
beginning.
It was a frosty morning in late winter when I opened the front door
Skeldale House and saw Mr Barge stan ding on the front step. He raised
l black homburg a few inches above the sparse strands of silver hair
and his pi features relaxed into a smile of gentle benevolence. He had
al ways treated me.
as a favourite son and I took it as a compliment because he was a man
immense prestige.
"Mr Herriot, "he murmured, and bowed slightly. The bow was rich in
dignity and matched the dark morning coat, striped trousers and shiny
leather brief case.
"Please come in, Mr Barge," I said, and ushered him into the house.
He al ways called at midday and stayed for lunch. My young boss,
Siegfried Far non, a man not easily overawed, invariably treated him
with deference a in fact the visit was something of a state occasion.
The modern rep breezes in, chats briefly about blood levels of
antibiotics a steroids, says a word or two about bulk discounts, drops
a few data sheets, the desk and hurries away. In a way I feel rather
sorry for these young because, with a few exceptions, they are all
selling the same things.
Mr Barge, on the other hand, like all his contemporaries, carried a
thick catalogue of exotic remedies, each one peculiar to its own
firm.
Siegfried pulled out the chair at the head of the dining table.
"Come and here, Mr Barge."
"You are very kind." The. old gentleman inclined his head slightly
and to his place.
As usual there was no reference to business during the meal and it
wasn't until the coffee appeared that Mr Barge dropped his brochure
carelessly on t table as though this part of the visit was an
unimportant afterthought.
Siegfried and I browsed through the pages, savouring the exciting whiff
witchcraft which has been blown from our profession by the wind of
science.
intervals my boss placed an order.
"I think we'd better have a couple of dozen electuaries," Mr Barge.
"Thank you so much." The old gentleman flipped open a leather-bound'
notebook and made an entry with a silver pencil.
"And we're get ting a bit low on fever drinks, aren't we, James?"
Siegfried glanced round at me.
"Yes, we'll need a gross of them if you please."
"I am most grateful," Mr Barge breathed, noting that down, too.
My employer murmured his requests as he riffled through the
catalogue.
Winchester of spirits of nit re and another of formalin, castration
clams, tri' bromide, Stockholm tar all the things we never use now and
Mr Barge responded gravely to each with
"I do thank you' or
"Thank you indeed," and flourish of his silver pencil. : Finally
Siegfried lay back in his chair.
"Well now, Mr Barge, I think the it unless you have anything new."
"As it happens, my dear Mr Far non, we have." The eyes in the pink
face twinkled.
"I can offer you our latest product,
"Soothitt", an admirable sedative.
In an instant Siegfried and I were all attention. Every animal doctor
is keenly interested in sedatives. Anything which makes our patients
more amenable , t;. .,. ~ - ~.,.
, ~, a blessing. Mr Barge extolled the unique properties of Soothitt
and we probed for further information.
"How about un maternal sows?" I asked.
"You know the kind which savage their young. I don't suppose it's any
good for that?"
"My dear young sir," Mr Barge gave me the kind of sorrowing smile a
bishop might bestow on an erring curate,
"Soothitt is a specific for this condition.
A
single injection to a farrowing sow and you will have no problems."
~That's great," I said.
"And does it have any effect on car sickness in dogs?"
The noble old features lit up with quiet triumph.
"Another classical indication, ~r Herriot Soothitt comes in tablet
form for that very purpose."
"Splendid' Siegfried drained his cup and stood up.
"Better send us a good supply then. And if you will excuse us, we must
start the afternoon round, Mr Barge. Thank you so much for calling."
We all shook hands, Mr Barge raised his homburg again on the front step
and another gracious occasion was over.
Within a week the new supplies from Car gill and Sons arrived.
Medicines were al ways sent in tea chests in those days and as I prised
open the wooden lid I looked with interest at the beautifully packed
phials and tablets of Soothitt.
And it seemed uncanny that I had a call for the new product
immediately.
That same day one of the town's bank managers, Mr Ronald Beresford,
called to see me.
"Mr Herriot," he said.
"As you know I have worked here for several years but I have been
offered the manager ship of a bigger branch down south and I leave
tomorrow for Portsmouth." From his gaunt height he looked down at me
with the unsmiling gaze which was characteristic of him.
"Portsmouth! Gosh, that's a long way."
"Yes, it is about three hundred miles. And I have a problem."
"Really ?"
"I have, I fear. I recently purchased a six-month-old cocker spaniel
and he is an excellent little animal but for the fact that he behaves
peculiarly in the car."
"In what way?"
He hesitated.
"Well, he's outside now. If you've got a minute to spare I could
demonstrate."
"Of course," I said.
"I'll come with you now."
We went out to the car. His wife was in the passenger seat, as fat as
her husband was thin, but with the same severe unbending manner. She
nodded at me coldly but the attractive little animal on her lap gave me
an enthusiastic welcome.
I stroked the long silky ears.
"He's a nice little fellow."
Mr Beresford gave me a sidelong glance.
"Yes, his name is Coco and he really is quite charming. It's only when
the engine is running that the trouble begins."
I got in the back, he pressed the starter and we set off. And I saw
immediately what he meant. The spaniel stiffened and raised his head
till his nose pointed at the roof. He formed his lips into a cone and
emitted a series of high-pitched howls.
"Hooo hooo, hooo, hooo," wailed Coco.
It really startled me because I had never heard anything quite like it.
I don't know whether it was the perfectly even spacing of the hoots,
their piercing, Jarring quality, or the fact that they never stopped
which drove the sound deep into my brain, but my head was singing after
a two minute circuit of the town.
I was vastly relieved when we drew up again outside the surgery.
I`mr Beresford switch
ed off the engine and it was as though he had
switched off the noise, too, because the little animal relaxed
instantly and began to lick my hand.
' Yes," I said. you have a problem without a doubt."
He pulled nervously at his tie.
"And it gets louder the longer you drive me take you a bit further
round and . . ." .
"No-no, no-no," I put in hastily.
"That won't be necessary. I can see er how you are placed. But you
say you haven't had Coco for long. He isn't I more than a pup. I'm
sure he'll get used to the car in time."
"Very possibly he will." Mr Beresford's voice was taut with appreher
"But I'm thinking of tomorrow. I've got to drive all the way to
Portsmouth my wife and this dog and I've tried car sickness tablets
without result."
A full day with that appalling din was unthinkable but at that moment
image of Mr Barge rose before me. He had sprouted wings and floated in
of my eyes like an elderly guardian angel. What an incredible piece of
luck "As it happens," I said with a reassuring smile, 'there is
something new this sort of thing, and by a coincidence we have just
received a batch of it t~ Come in and I'll fix you up."
"Well, thank heavens for that." Mr Beresford examined the box of table
just give one half an hour before the journey and all will be well ?"
"That's the idea," I replied cheerfully.
"I've given you a few extra for f Journeys.
"I am most grateful, you've taken a great load off my mind." He went o
the car and I watched as he started the engine. As if in response to a
signal little brown head on the back seat went up and the lips
pursed.
"Hooo, hooo, hooo, hooo," Coco yowled, and his master shot me a de
sparing look as he drove away.
I stood on the steps for some time, listening incredulously. Many
people Darrow by didn't like Mr Beresford very much, probably because
of his manner, but I felt he wasn't a bad chap and he certainly had my
sympathy.
Long after the car had disappeared round the corner of Trengate I could
hear Coco. _ "Hooo, hooo, hooo, hooo."
About seven o'clock that evening I had a phone call from Will Hollin.
"Gertrude's started farrow in'!" he said urgently.
"And she's try in' to worr, pigs!"
It was bad news. Sows occasionally alta,cked their piglets after birth
an fact would kill them if they were not removed from their reach. And
of course it meant that suckling was impossible.
It was a tricky problem at any time but particularly so in this case
because Gertrude was a pedigree sow an expensive animal Will Hollin had
bought improve his strain of pigs.
"How many has she had?" I asked.
"Four and she's gone for every one." His voice was tense.
It was then I remembered Soothitt and again I blessed the coming of
Barge. : I smiled into the receiver.
"There's a new product I can use, Mr Hollin.
arrived today. I'll be right out."
I trotted through to the dispensary, opened the box of phials and had a
q, read at the enclosed pamphlet. Ah yes, there it was.
"Ten cc intra muscularly the sow will accept the piglets within twenty
minutes."
It wasn't a long drive to the Hollin farm but as I sped through the
dark.
I could discern the workings of fate in the day's events. The Soothitt
had an this morning and right away I had two urgent calls for it. There
was no Mr Barge had been sent for a purpose living proof, perhaps, that
every thing Vet ~n a S;bin 705 in our lives is preordained. It gave me
Vet in a Spin Page 2