by Reilly, Cora
“You were always the responsible type. And I don’t really feel any more grown-up or sensible than before.”
Romero opened the car, showing me the barren inside. No seats or steering wheel.
“I hope you got this as a gift.” I’d never been a fan of vintage cars. I loved to have the newest gimmicks.
“This is a rare piece. I would have paid double just to get my hands on it.”
“So you think you still have time for such a big project besides work, two kids, and a wife?”
Romero shrugged. “I sleep less and I don’t party anymore. The time I wasted on nursing hangovers in the past is now dedicated to other things.”
“Could you sound any more straitlaced?”
“After all the shit we see and do in our job, I enjoy the boring, ordinary side of my home life.”
I shook my head. “Speak for yourself. I still love the thrill.” My phone rang and Luca’s name flashed across the screen. I took the call.
“We got our hands on two new recruits from Tartarus. I thought I’d ask if you feel like getting your hands dirty.”
My smile widened. “Do you even have to ask?”
“Maybe you’re still stuck in the baby bubble. Don’t want Gianna to get her panties in a bunch.”
“Don’t worry. I’ll be there in a bit. Where?”
“Warehouse 2.”
I hung up.
Romero scanned my face. “That’s your torture prelude face.”
“Luca got a job for me. You interested in getting your hands on some bikers?”
“I have to pay a visit to one of our bars. And you probably need me to take Gianna home later, right?”
I nodded. “Yeah, probably. I’ll see what she says.”
I headed back into the house. Lily and Gianna were still on the couch, drinking coffee. Isa slept beside Gianna, her arms stretched out over her head. Gianna looked up, scanning my face with narrowed eyes. “What’s up?”
“Luca called and asked if I could help him.”
“From the eager look in your eyes, I’m guessing it involves plenty of blood.”
“It might.” It most definitely would. I hadn’t been involved in the business for almost two weeks and felt itchy to return.
Gianna shrugged, touching Isa’s chest lightly. “We’re good here. I’m sure Romero will give me a lift later. Go have fun.”
I leaned down and gave her a lingering kiss. I waved at Liliana, then said a quick goodbye to Romero before I raced off in my car. My pulse began to quicken. For some reason this felt like the beginning, when the prospect of torture and danger still kept my blood pounding for a long time.
When I pulled up in front of our warehouse, I was whistling and eager like a teenage boy before his first fuck.
Luca shook his head when I strode into the warehouse. “You look like you might be peeing yourself from excitement.” He clapped my shoulder. “That bad at home? I thought you and Gianna were starting to find a routine with Isabella.”
“We are. That’s not it. I just missed this… being responsible twenty-four seven is hard. I’m just looking forward to a taste of my old life.”
Luca chuckled. “Knock yourself out. These bikers think they are tough.” He motioned toward the back of the warehouse and walked ahead. Behind heaps of old tires, two guys, maybe in their early twenties, were bound to chairs. Someone had roughened them up a bit; busted lips, a few scratches here and there, and already forming bruises. Nothing major. Not yet.
I gave them a grin and pulled my knife from its holster.
Growl leaned against the bare stone wall to my left, inked arms crossed and that stoic expression on his face that belied his violent nature. He nodded my way and I returned the gesture but quickly focused my attention back to our two captives.
One look at them told me they weren’t the sharpest knives in the cupboard. That wasn’t a surprise. The MCs often scraped their recruits from the bottom of society.
I doubted these guys knew anything of worth about the men we really wanted to have intel on: Earl White and his nephew Maddox. But cutting them up and sending them back to the bikers sent them a message even those redneck idiots must understand at some point.
Luca leaned against the wall beside Growl. I wouldn’t argue if they wanted me to do all the work. I couldn’t wait.
I chose the bulkier, braver looking first. Usually I kept the hard nuts for last, but I was too eager to prolong the fun.
It was early evening when I came back home. I hadn’t stayed longer than necessary, not wanting to abandon Gianna. The penthouse was quiet and the lights were out. I set the takeout bags down on the kitchen counter and went in search of my wife and daughter.
Wife and daughter…
Who would have thought I’d ever have a small family?
Following a dim light into the bedroom, I found Gianna. She was curled up on her side on top of the covers in our bed, fast asleep. Isa was stretched out beside her, protected by Gianna’s body and a pillow. I walked over to them, and as if she could sense me, Isa opened her eyes and began squirming. Careful to be quiet, I picked her up and cradled her in my arms. I pressed a soft kiss to her forehead.
Dealing with the bikers had been fun, something I couldn’t live without, but returning home to Isa and Gianna, it was the peaceful harbor I now craved in a way I’d have never thought possible. I’d always made fun of Luca for his split personality: the loving father and husband, and the batshit crazy, brutal Capo, but I got it now.
Gianna stirred, rolling over onto her back and eyes fluttering open. She was in my sweats and T-shirt, looking completely disheveled. Slowly her gaze focused on me. “What time is it?”
“Almost eight,” I said. “I got sushi for us.”
She sat up. “You’re early. I thought you’d use your chance to have some freedom.”
She pushed to her feet with a groan. “Fuck, I feel old.”
I grinned. “I’m glad I won’t be the only one teaching Isa curse words.”
Gianna huffed and leaned against me. I bent down and kissed her but Isa interrupted us with a wail. “I think she’s hungry too. I’ll nurse her and then we can have sushi.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
I handed Isa to Gianna before I headed back downstairs and set up the coffee table. Thirty minutes later Gianna came downstairs, dressed in shorts and a tank. Her belly was still slightly curved but she still looked sexy to me.
She sank down on the couch beside me. “You got me Kombucha?”
“Yep, your favorite brand.”
Gianna took a sip before she started digging in. After we were done, Gianna settled in my arm on the couch and we watched Walking Dead. I still didn’t understand why she had no trouble watching it considering her aversion to bloodshed. Judging by the silence of the baby monitor, Isa was soundly asleep.
I stroked Gianna’s thigh. We hadn’t shared any kind of intimacy in four weeks and I was slowly starting to get horny. Gianna hadn’t made a move yet, which was unusual. In the past, she’d been a very active partner, but of course I remembered Luca’s words.
She gave me a disbelieving look. “I don’t even remember the last time I shaved.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll find what I’m looking for.”
She let out an exasperated laugh. “You’re impossible.”
I shrugged. “I’m horny. You know how much you turn me on.”
Gianna searched my face. “I can’t believe I still turn you on. I definitely don’t feel sexy.”
“You’re always sexy to me. What about you? Are you in the mood for a little loving?”
Gianna grimaced. “My mind says yes, but every exhausted and healing part of my body says no.”
I kissed her temple and leaned back. “Whenever you feel ready, I’m here, waiting for you.”
Gianna relaxed back into my arm with a smile. “Sometimes I wish I could tell seventeen-year-old Gianna that you’re not as bad as she thinks.”
“Not as b
ad? That’s all you’d tell her?”
She nicked the skin at my neck. “Oh no, I’d tell her how amazing in bed you are, with your tongue and your cock and your fingers and every other part of your body as well.”
I groaned. “You’re torturing me.”
“It’s something we’re both good at.”
“You’re better at it, babe, much better.”
Gianna
Matteo let out a low whistle. “You are sex on legs, aren’t you?”
I glanced toward the door, narrowing my eyes. He leaned in the doorway, tight white dress shirt hugging his abs and pecs, dark hair perfectly mussed up, and just overall male perfection.
He was sex on legs, the bastard. I, in comfy sweatpants that didn’t squeeze my poor frayed vagina, without makeup, unwashed hair and stains on my shirt where milk had leaked out of my stupid breasts was a full-blown nightmare. Three weeks since I’d given birth and I’d reached a low point. Matteo was back to working every day and I couldn’t deny it: I was envious.
Seeing his grin, I considered committing my first murder. I could probably make it look like self-defense. After all, Matteo was a notorious mobster. “Oh shut up, or I’ll throw the fucking milk bottle at your head.”
Matteo clucked his tongue. “No cussing around our precious offspring, or have you forgotten?”
I raised the milk bottle. I alternated between breastfeeding and milk from the bottle to give my poor nipples time to recuperate. I wasn’t sure if Isa was particularly bad at nursing or if my nipples weren’t made for mom-life. “Last warning.”
Isabella let out a wail and I let my arm sink with a quiet sigh. Matteo came in, kissed my temple and took our girl from me, cradling her in his arm. He took the bottle. “I’m taking over the rest of the night. Grab a couple of hours of sleep.”
At first, I’d felt bad because I couldn’t only breastfeed our daughter like Lily seemed to be doing with ease but now I was glad that she took the bottle and Matteo or Aria could feed her as well. “Are you sure? You must be tired,” I said despite the bone deep exhaustion in my body.
Matteo had been gone all night on some kind of business that he and Luca had to conduct and that usually didn’t mean anything good. Most of the time it involved risky attacks on outposts of the motorcycle club they were at war with.
Something dark flashed across Matteo’s face. “I’m good. Adrenaline.”
“You shouldn’t risk your life now that we’ve got Isabella,” I muttered. Recently, the conflicts with the Bratva and the MCs who worked with them had escalated. At least, the Outfit lay low. There was enough money to be made for all crime families so I’d never understood why they insisted on fighting each other, except for pride and testosterone.
“I didn’t, Gianna. Luca and I dealt with a few Russians that got caught.”
My nose wrinkled because I knew what that meant. Matteo regarded me as he rocked Isabella gently. I gave him a tired smile then kissed him again. I didn’t like what he did but I loved him. “Thanks.”
Matteo nodded and peered down at Isabella, then gently nudged her lips with the bottle. She latched on to it and began drinking.
Relieved, I moved toward the bed and crept under the covers. Despite the lights, I fell asleep almost instantly.
The weeks dragged on, night and day blurring into each other. I got a better handle on Isa’s feeding and sleeping schedule, and even managed to squeeze in a shower almost every day.
I really started feeling more like myself when I was cleared for working out by my doctor six weeks after giving birth. The first time I stepped into my gym, I really felt like past-Gianna, as if there was room for me besides being a mom. Cara waved at me from behind the reception desk. She had taken over a few classes and also the reception duties since she’d been working out in my gym from the very start. She managed to be a mom and to keep doing what she enjoyed. Her two boys spent time with their grandma whenever Cara worked.
I went over to her and hugged her. “How are things going over here?”
“Good,” she said with a confident smile. “What about you? How are you doing? I remember the first few weeks of being a first-time mom in a sleep-deprived haze.”
“That sums it up. But it’s been getting better. Isa only wakes twice per night now. That’s a huge improvement.”
“Good!”
The bell rang and the wife and daughter of a soldier stepped in. They congratulated me before they headed into the changing rooms. Of course, nobody could enter the building without passing a security check downstairs. Matteo and Luca had insisted on it.
“I’m going to do Pilates by myself for an hour. Just going to get changed.”
“Will you return to teaching classes soon?”
“Yes,” I said without hesitation. Matteo and I hadn’t discussed when I’d start working again. It wasn’t as if I was earning any money with it. The gym and classes were complimentary for all the women in our world, but I still felt like I was doing something useful.
Cara nodded. “Your customers will be happy to hear that.”
“They enjoyed your aerobic classes as well.”
“They do but they definitely miss yoga.”
I couldn’t deny how good Cara’s words made me feel.
After I’d changed into my workout clothes for the first time in almost three months, I headed into the Pilates room. Giving birth to Isa had left its marks. I definitely didn’t look as fit anymore and my belly wasn’t as flat as it used to be. But worse than the obvious changes were the invisible ones. I felt as if I was doing Pilates for the very first time. My balance was off and my stamina as well. Still I couldn’t stop grinning stupidly once I was done with my workout. I felt reborn as the old Gianna.
“I’ll be back tomorrow,” I told Cara before I left.
I got into my car, a cute Smart, much to Matteo’s chagrin, and pulled out of the underground garage. The car with my bodyguards followed close by. It had taken a while for me to win this piece of freedom. I didn’t want those baboons in a car with me, much less did I want them to drive me around like chauffeurs. Alone in my car with the music turned up all the way, I felt like a normal woman, not a mob wife.
I pulled up in front of Aria and Luca’s mansion, then waited for one of my bodyguards to check the perimeter. Once he gave a nod, I got out of my car and headed toward the massive wooden door with a metal lion claw as a doorknob.
Before I could knock, Aria opened the door with a grin, cradling Isa in her arms. “And?” she asked.
“Everything aches and I’ll have sore muscles tomorrow, but I feel better than I have in a long time.”
Isa gave me a goofy smile and my heart beat faster. I took her from Aria, gave her chubby baby cheek a fat kiss and pressed her against my chest. Now that she was back in my arms, I realized I’d missed her, but working out had given my mind and body a necessary kickstart. “Thank you for watching her. You seem to have had fun.”
Aria could hardly take her eyes off Isa. “Marcella and Amo are already so grown up in comparison. I really miss the baby stage.”
I shook my head. “I can’t wait for the baby phase to be over so Isa and I can do fun things together. Right now, she can only poo and scream.”
Aria laughed. “Do you want to come in for a coffee and some cake?”
“Coffee, yes. Cake, no.”
Aria rolled her eyes. “Back to being fit Gianna?”
“You bet. These additional baby pounds won’t disappear on their own.”
“They did for me.”
I gave her a death glare. “Not everyone is graced with your supermodel genes.”
“We share the same genes.”
I followed her into their ginormous living room with a splendid view into their yard. I still wasn’t convinced Luca hadn’t helped with the sudden death of the previous owner to get his hands on such a rare property in New York.
A tray with coffee was already set up on the table. I sank down on the beige leather sofa and
put Isa down between my leg and the armrest, tickling her belly.
“I fed her about thirty minutes ago but she didn’t want to fall asleep.”
“She’ll do it soon enough,” I said. And less than five minutes later, Isa slept fast.
Aria regarded me. “You look happy. I’m glad Pilates is giving you so much joy. Once you start teaching Pilates classes again, I’ll be your first customer.”
“But you enjoyed the aerobic classes, right?”
Aria laughed. “Yes, I told you before. You really can’t give up control. Cara really did a good job, so don’t worry.”
“The gym feels like my baby too. I worked so hard to convince Matteo to let me do it and then to build it up.”
“And you did a great job. The gym is always bursting with customers.”
“I really want to get back to teaching Pilates and yoga classes soon,” I said hesitantly. In the past, I’d never had trouble saying my opinion straight out, but for some reason, mom guilt managed to wedge itself into my brain.
Aria shrugged. “Why don’t you just turn your own workout sessions into classes?”
“I’m not as fit as I used to be and if I work out, I can’t give as much attention to my customers. Many of them need guidance to perform the correct moves.”
“Then explain that your current classes are less guided. I’m sure many people would still enjoy working out with you. I’m one of them.”
I squeezed her thigh. “Thanks.”
That evening during dinner I told Matteo about my plan to get back to teaching yoga and Pilates classes.
“Sure, why not? If you feel fit enough, why wouldn’t you? It’s not like Isa needs you twenty-four seven. She’ll survive spending an hour or two with Aria.”
I walked over to him and kissed him. Matteo never cared much about what other people thought, that’s probably what I loved most about him. He pulled me down on his lap, deepening the kiss at once. His fingers tangled in my hair, and my hands roamed over his muscled chest.
“The doc cleared you for all kinds of physical activities, right?” Matteo murmured against my lips.