All That Matters

by E. L. Todd

“Well, I try to make sure his food doesn’t fall on the ground,” Lexie said with a light chuckle. “I love it when—”

  “I’m not sure what I’m going to order.” Mom stared at her menu. “Mike, what are you going to get?”

  Lexie fell silent, her confidence gone.

  I understood my mom being cold toward Lexie, but interrupting her was a whole new level of disrespect. “Mom, knock it off.”

  She turned her gaze on me, and it was full of threat.

  “I know you don’t like Lexie and I understand why,” I said. “You don’t have to love her or even be nice to her. But don’t be rude.” My mom had every right to be upset with Lexie, but that went too far.

  Mom turned to Dad, silently telling him he needed to straighten me out.

  Dad shrugged. “Lexie is obviously going to be in the picture. We should make an effort to accept her.”

  Now I had endless gratitude toward him.

  Mom threw her menu down and gave Lexie a terrifying look. “My son, Conrad Preston, is the most eligible bachelor in this city. He’s handsome, smart, funny, and the most compassionate man I’ve ever met. He has a heart of gold and he’s the best damn son I could have ever asked for. You lost my respect the moment you hurt him. You didn’t appreciate him or value him. So if you want me to respect you then you better start respecting him.”

  Instead of cowering away or bursting into tears, Lexie nodded. “You’re absolutely right. I promise you that I will.”

  If Lexie was willing to put up with this then she obviously really loved me.

  Mom wanted to keep arguing judging the weird contortion of her lips, but Lexie didn’t give her an excuse to. She crossed her arms and sat there quietly. Dad watched her with hesitation, unsure if that was really the end of it.

  “I hate what I did to Conrad because it hurt him so much.” Lexie watched my mom even though she wouldn’t meet her look. “But I also hate how much I hurt both of you. You guys accepted me as another daughter the moment I came around despite my unusual career and the way Conrad and I started our relationship. You guys wanted to spend time with me even when Conrad wasn’t around. I was accepted into your family, and I actually felt like part of it. Losing that, throwing it away, is my biggest regret.” Lexie kept her voice steady as she spoke but the emotion was in her eyes.

  Dad’s eyes softened before he looked at Mom.

  Mom still purposely looked away but her shoulders weren’t as stern as before.

  Lexie looked down at the table, the defeat stretching across her face. “I don’t understand why Conrad has agreed to give me another chance, not when he can have anyone he wants. But he has. I promise I’ll never take that for granted. I’m so thankful he loves me the way he does, and I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to him.”

  Dad had finally let go of his resistance. He turned to Mom and lowered his voice. “Come on, baby…”

  “Am I supposed to let everything go just because she said some pretty words?” Mom hissed.

  “In case you’ve forgotten, we broke up because you didn’t want to have a family with me,” Dad reminded her. “And I was the perfect man to you. I was the most eligible bachelor in all of Manhattan and you still tossed me aside.”

  “Mike, this isn’t about us. And Lexie can’t even have children.”

  I didn’t want to start that topic. “Mom, that’s not up for conversation.” That was Lexie’s personal decision.

  Lexie spoke up. “It can be reversed.”

  “But I doubt she wants to reverse it,” Mom snarled.

  “Stop talking about her in third person.” Sometimes my mom acted like a child.

  “It’s okay.” Lexie placed her hand on mine. “I don’t blame her for being so upset.”

  “Kissing my ass isn’t going to help,” Mom snapped.

  I sighed and tried not to tell her off.

  Lexie kept her cool. “I do want to have children—with Conrad. I wouldn’t have kids with anyone else but him.”

  Mom simmered in silence.

  “Baby.” Dad grabbed her hand under the table. “No relationship is perfect. There are always bumps in the road. Tell me one relationship that hasn’t had its drawbacks.”

  “Janice and Ryan.” She said it without hesitation.

  “That’s not true,” Dad argued. “He tried to leave her before they got married.”

  “For, like, five minutes,” Mom said. “Lexie denied Conrad’s marriage proposal. That’s unforgiveable.”

  “Mom.” I kept my voice calm even though I was anything but calm. “I felt the same way for a long time. I hated Lexie for what she did to me. I refused to think about her and I pushed her to the back of my mind. With her gone, I moved on as much as possible. I lost my way and did a lot of things I regret. When Lexie came back I was too upset to forgive her. I couldn’t even look her in the eye without wanting to scream. It took me a long time to finally let it go. And the only reason why I’ve let it go is because…I love her. I don’t know what it is about her that’s captured me so tightly, and I don’t know why my heart is so attached to hers. But it is. I could have any woman I want but she’s the only one I want. She’s the one who can make me happy. If we can have what we had before, pure happiness, then I’d like to try. If I can manage to let the past go and move on, then I think you should too.”

  Mom closed her eyes for a few seconds, like those words hit her in a vulnerable place.

  Dad watched her, waiting for her reaction.

  Lexie kept her hand on mind, her skin warm.

  Mom finally released a deep sigh like she was still indecisive. “When you have children you’ll understand how I feel, Conrad. Anyone who hurts my baby like that doesn’t get a clean slate. Frankly, it’ll never be the way it used to be. But I can try to move on…that’s the most I can offer you.”

  I knew it was all I would get out of her at the moment. “I’ll take it.”

  Lexie nodded. “Thank you, Mrs. Preston.”

  Mom continued to ignore her.

  Dad grabbed the wine menu. “Should we start with red or white?”

  Mom looked at the dinner menu in silence.

  Dad knew she wasn’t going to respond. “What do you think, Lexie?”

  “I like both,” she said quietly. “But you can never go wrong with red.”

  “You and I think alike.” He set the menu aside.

  At least Dad was making a genuine effort. Hopefully, Mom would come around…one day.

  ***

  We said goodbye outside the restaurant.

  Mom hugged me tightly, just like my first day of high school. She didn’t want to let me go. She didn’t like knowing she couldn’t kiss every boo-boo and help me stand up when I’d fallen. “I love you, Son. I hope you know that.”

  I held her against my chest. “I do, Mom.” She wasn’t short but I was still a foot taller than her. It was weird to think that I used to be afraid of her at one point. Whenever I snuck into the cookie jar or brought a lizard home she gave me the look of death, and of course I ran with my tail between my legs. But now I was a gladiator and she was the helpless one. “And I love you too.”

  “I just want the best for you.”

  “I know. And I honestly think Lexie is it.”

  She sighed in disappointment.

  “I’m sorry. I wish I didn’t love her but I do.”

  “It’s unfortunate we don’t have more control over that…” She pulled away and gave me a smile that didn’t reach her eyes.

  “Tell me about it.”

  Dad gave me a one-arm hug. “I’ll see you at work tomorrow.”

  “Great…”

  Dad chuckled then gave me a quick kiss on the temple. “Brat.” He dropped his embrace then hugged Lexie, to my surprise. “Have a good night.”

  “You too.” She hugged him back but there was a look of surprise on her face.

  “I’ll be seeing you.” He stepped away so Mom could say good night.

  Mom stared
at her but didn’t make a move. All she could muster was a quick nod before she headed to the car.

  Dad sighed then shrugged. “Give her time.”

  “It’s okay,” Lexie said. “I understand why it’s difficult for her.”

  He patted her shoulder. “Just keep it up. The group will accept you eventually.”

  “Hopefully,” she whispered.

  “Well, goodnight.” Dad walked away and caught up to Mom.

  Lexie watched them go before she turned back to me. “I’m sorry I caused all this pain for your family…I feel terrible.”

  “It’s okay.” I pulled her in for a hug. “I’m sorry my mom is so rude to you.”

  “It’s okay. I don’t blame her. My mom and sister would give you hell until the end of time if you did that to me.”

  I smiled at the thought. “Your mom would bake me a cake and slip rat poisoning inside.”

  She laughed into my chest. “That does sound like something she would do.”

  “It’s cold out,” I said. “Let’s head home.”

  “Okay.”

  I pulled her under my arm, and together we headed back to my apartment. When we passed her building she stopped walking.

  “Don’t forget to drop me off.”

  I hadn’t even thought about it. All I wanted to do was go home and get into bed. I guess I just assumed she would join me even though she never had before. “You want to stay over…?” It was a conversation we hadn’t had in a long time. Actually, I wasn’t sure if we ever had it. Whenever she would stay with me it was a silent agreement.

  “You want me to…?” Her eyes lit up like Christmas. Her voice carried her doubt but her features showed her hope.

  “Yeah.”

  “Okay.” When she moved back into my side it was with much more life than before. Despite the horrible dinner we had she seemed invigorated.

  We walked to my apartment then entered the doorway. Apollo was in the living room like usual, and when he saw Lexie he turned around and headed to his dish bowl. His prejudice was similar to my mother’s. He didn’t like Lexie and it didn’t seem like he ever would.

  I didn’t want to sleep on the couch because there wasn’t enough room. My king size bed was much better than the cramped space of the couch. We headed into my bedroom and I stripped down to my boxers, what I usually wore to bed. I handed Lexie some clothes because I wasn’t ready to do anything more than sleep.

  She changed in the bathroom then came to bed in my sweatpants and t-shirt. Even though nothing fit her correctly she looked cute, like always. She got into bed beside me and turned off the lamp.

  My body enveloped hers and I pulled her tiny frame against mine. The smell of her hair hit me right in the face, and I loved feeling the curves of her body against mine. It reminded me of the endless nights we spent together, cuddling and making love.

  Apollo jumped on the bed then immediately walked right between us, forcing us apart with his large size.

  Lexie got a mouthful of hair and she coughed until she spit it out.

  Apollo dropped his body right between us, purposely wedging us apart. Then he rested his head on the pillow and closed his eyes like he didn’t do anything wrong.

  Lexie finally caught her breath. “Does he always sleep there?”

  “No.” I glared at Apollo until he looked at me. He didn’t open his eyes, and I knew he was doing it on purpose. “Apollo?”

  He opened his eyes but acted like everything was ordinary.

  “Get off the bed.”

  He closed his eyes again.

  “Apollo. Now.” I gave him a gentle shove.

  He acted like he was asleep.

  “Goddammit, Apollo.” What the hell had gotten into him?

  Lexie laughed from the other side of the bed. “It’s so cute that I can’t get mad.”

  “You think this is cute?” I asked incredulously. “He’s being a little shit.”

  “He doesn’t want you to get too close to me, so he’s separating us. He’s basically babysitting us.”

  “I don’t need a babysitter.”

  Apollo stretched his legs like he was already in dreamland.

  “This is ridiculous.” Apollo was calling the shots.

  “It’s okay, Conrad. He needs to start trusting me.”

  “Or better yet, he needs to mind me,” I snapped.

  “It’s fine.” She moved one arm over Apollo and found my fingers with hers. “This works.”

  “I can’t believe my dog is bossing me around.” I turned over so our hands could reach each other easier.

  “I think it’s cute,” Lexie said. “He loves you so much, Conrad.”

  “Yeah…I know.” It was hard to stay mad at him when she pointed that out.

  Lexie released a deep sigh from her side of the bed. “Good night, Con.”

  “Good night, Lexie.”

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  Skye

  “You need to make sure he gets there by six,” Clementine said over the phone. “The sun goes down at six thirty.”

  “I’ll get him there. Don’t worry about it.”

  “And you can’t let him go home first. He has to go straight to the Preston Manor.”

  “Yes,” I said sarcastically. “I know how to follow instructions. You’ve told me this a million times.”

  “Then don’t mess it up.”

  “What about Ward’s family?” I asked. “Is that ready to go?”

  “Yes. Everything has worked out so far. The only thing missing is Ward. Make sure you get him there. Do whatever you have to do.”

  “Got it.”

  ***

  It was strange walking into PIXEL after being off work for so long. My body automatically knew the way to the top floor, but my eyes weren’t used to the subtle changes. Different pictures hung on the walls, and the floors of the elevators had been replaced.

  It felt like a different world.

  Now that I had Cedric it was hard to believe I was ever committed to anything else in my life. The time before him seemed to be a blank blur. I never suspected I’d be one of those obsessive mothers, but I quickly realized I was.

  When the elevator doors opened I stepped out onto the top floor. Employees I recognized stopped for chitchat a few times. They asked about Cedric, and I always gave a long-winded answer.

  By the time I got to Ward’s office I’d wasted twenty minutes talking. I had a plan laid out and now I just had to stick with it. Ward was pretty easy-going so it shouldn’t be difficult to manipulate him.

  I tapped my knuckles against his door before I stepped inside. “Busy?”

  Ward looked up from his computer and when he realized it was me he smiled. “I didn’t know you were back already. I thought you’d be gone for at least a few more months.”

  “I’m not back, actually,” I said. “I just thought I would swing by.”

  “Well, it’s great to see you.” He came around the desk and hugged me. “The little guy isn’t with you?”

  “No, he’s with Grandma.”

  “I’m sure the two of them are partying hard.”

  “Oh yeah,” I said. “My mom is crazy.”

  He chuckled because it was so absurd. “Well, thanks for stopping by. It’s always nice to see you.”

  “Actually, I was hoping you could give me a lift.”

  “A lift?” he asked. “Where?”

  “To my parents house.”

  “Isn’t your dad here?”

  “No, he already went home. So did Mike.”

  “Oh. And what about Cayson?”

  I rehearsed this line beforehand. “He has a meeting until after seven and I don’t want to wait around that long.”

  Ward’s face was unreadable as he listened to me. Then he answered with a shrug. “Sure. I can give you a ride.”

  “Thanks.” I knew that would be easy.

  “I’ll call Clementine and let her know I’ll be late.”

  “Nah. I don’t think that’s n
ecessary.” She was still getting ready for the wedding, putting on her dress and getting her hair done. I knew everyone was running around trying to throw it together before Ward arrived.

  He raised an eyebrow. “You don’t think it’s necessary?”

  Now I had to think quickly. “I just texted her and told her I was going to ask you for a ride, so she already knows.”

  He didn’t blink an eye over that explanation. “Oh okay.”

  Yes.

  He rose out of his chair then put his jacket on. “Want to get dinner beforehand?”

  “I wish,” I said. “But I should relieve my mom of babysitting duties.”

  “I doubt she gets tired of it.” He put his satchel over his shoulder. “Monnique wants Ward Jr. every second of the day.”

  “Yeah…but I miss my baby.”

  He chuckled. “I know how you feel.” He turned a picture frame toward me. “I miss Ward Jr. all the time.”

  “It’s crazy to think we’re both parents.”

  “Really crazy,” he said. “I want to have another. But Clementine has to marry me first…” His voice dropped off with a bitter tone. The distant rage smoldered in his eyes.

  I tried not to laugh. “It’ll happen. Don’t worry about it.”

  “I’m sure Conrad and Lexie are more likely to get married than us,” he snapped.

  “I really doubt it…”

  “Or even Heath and Roland.”

  “Also doubt it.” I tried to change the subject before Ward got really worked up over it. “Is my dad doing okay without me here?”

  He came around his desk and started to walk with me. “Yeah, he seems fine. Honestly, Conrad does everything around here. Sean and Mike just piss away the clock.”

  “Then why are they still here?” They said they were going to retire years ago.

  “Not sure,” he said. “But I suspect they are worried about Conrad. You know, because he went off the deep end a while back.”

  Conrad would never live that down. “Maybe.”

  We headed to the parking garage right next to the building and then entered his black Mercedes. The car perfectly suited him. It was sleek and shiny, and it had British written all over it.

  “You’ve never been in here before, huh?” he asked.

  “Nope.” I felt the leather seat then eyed the console. “It’s nice.”