I shook my head. “It’s not your fault. I just. I trusted that cop just now. I’m nervous. And my hand won’t stop shaking.”
“You can trust Merck. I raised that boy. And I know you’re almost fourteen, but I’ll be here for you for as long as you want.” She picked up my teacup and lifted it to my lips.
I was so surprised, I took a sip. She patted at my mouth after she set the teacup down.
“Why are you being nice to me?” I watched her like she was ready to hurt me.
“First, I think we’re going to get along. Second,” she waved her hand to the cross on the wall and quoted from the Bible, “the King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’”
“So I’m the least?” I was confused.
“No, sweet boy. You’re Jesus’ brother. We’re family.”
The Bible stuff scared me late at night, but her eyes were warm and her concern was the first I’d experienced in so long. The next sip of tea I was able to take on my own.
Animal cleared his throat. We weren’t in the home anymore, but my gigantic house.
“You went somewhere for a minute there.” He took a bite of his sandwich.
“I do that.” I sipped my drink. My hand was steady all these years later.
“I’ve some good news for you.” Animal reached into the pocket of his leather vest.
“My father’s dead?” I was only half-joking.
“Naw, baby. I wouldn’t eat a sandwich before I told you that news.” He opened a flyer and smoothed it out on the table. “Look what’s happening tomorrow.”
OFF-SEASON DAY OF THE DEAD AT MEME’S BAR!
PARTY YOUR FACE OFF!
THURSDAY, FRIDAY, AND SATURDAY
“Her bar?” I knew the answer to that question. It was hers.
“Yup. You know I’ve popped in there a few times. It’s like fate’s winking at you right here, Bones.” Animal polished off the rest of the sandwich.
“That’s tomorrow. I thought Day of the Dead was in fall?” My heart raced and I clenched my fists. It bothered me that Animal had already been in Becca’s presence, but it was a relief as well. He’d been in Meme’s for drinks on occasion.
“Yeah, I bet they got Day of the Dead and Cinco de Mayo confused. Though they’re late for the May holiday too.” Animal pointed at the fine print with his giant pinkie finger. “You get the first drink free if you dress up.”
I was already dressed for this party. I was always dressed for this party.
“You best live through the night, baby. Your dreams are about to come true.” Animal cleaned up the lunch plates and then stood with his arms crossed. “I want to hear all the plans for this meeting with Bat Feybi. We’re not making a single mistake tonight.”
I picked up the flyer and stared at the skull in the center. She wouldn’t have to fear me. She would be expecting me.
“Not a single mistake,” I agreed.
10
BULLETS
Becca
I had two packages on my step. The first was from Amazon so I knew it was my work costume, luckily. I needed it by tomorrow and I had been watching the tracking. The second was a prize I’d won on my claw machine game. I opened that one up first. The plushie seal was cute. I cuddled it and tested its flappers.
The stress in my life was evident when I was getting this many prizes. I didn’t want to add up how much I was spending, honestly. I had a budget to stick to. But, the joy I felt holding the thing I won was worth it.
After I set it on the couch, I opened my three outfits and the makeup kit. I should practice my makeup, but Mom was interested in going shopping. After I hung my costumes in my closet, noting that they would need to have the wrinkles steamed out of them, I grabbed my purse.
One last check of my makeup, hair, and outfit in the mirror by my door, and I was ready to roll. I had dark jeans, nude heels, and a red top. My hair was as helmeted as a newscaster and my nails matched my top, sunglasses, and lipstick. I was going overboard, but it made Mom happy and I needed her to smile. Her concern was all over the place. Waiting for the results of the scans was mind-numbing torture. And I knew she only had me. I’d hear about the lack of grandchildren for sure, because Mom would rather be in grandma mode and able to focus on the grandkids I hadn’t provided her. Instead, we had to be two single ladies looking for a little retail therapy.
I drove all the way to her apartment and made sure to make a lot of noise as I knocked and greeted her. Mom didn’t like the bitch next door to think she didn’t get visitors.
Mom was ready to go and grabbed her purse and tossed her phone into it. “Thanks for being on time.”
It was a jab. I was usually a little late. Dragging my feet usually took extra time. But today was her day. And tomorrow too. I felt like I could let all the crap she would say slide off my back like a duck with water.
“We going to your favorite place for lunch?” I knew where we were headed, but I wanted her to have the full going out experience. I would ask her about herself, her opinions on leggings and purse dogs, whatever she needed.
She didn’t need my help getting in the car. All her hot yoga had her more fit than some people half her age.
The ride to Gustov’s was uneventful. I got an earful about leggings not being pants again. She had no idea that I had fourteen pairs at home and loved them.
When we pulled into the parking lot, I watched a slow grin spread on my mother’s face. I followed her fixation on a silver BMW.
All the pieces snapped together in my head. Goddammit. “You didn’t?”
She shrugged and looked all too pleased with herself. Before I knew it, Alton was opening the passenger side door and offering his arm.
I watched as she leaned on him like she was a mermaid experiencing her first day on legs. I rolled my eyes behind my sunglasses. She could probably tie her legs in a knot around her neck if she wanted to. Alton peeked into my car once Mom was “steady”.
“Becca! It’s great to meet you here. Thanks for having your mom arrange this lunch. Now I get to have a meal with two gorgeous women.”
My mother tittered. Tittered.
It was going to be a long afternoon. And I was so set on being everything she wanted. I should have known she’d hit the gas pedal on this whole situation. Patience was not her virtue.
And then I felt guilty again. What was a simple lunch with a handsome guy if it made her happy and passed the time?
I stepped out of the car to follow them inside when I felt the chill tight walk up my spine. I was being watched. I turned around and scanned the area.
Nothing was out of place that I could tell. Just people going about their lunch business. In the sun. In the afternoon. But my soul felt like it was the middle of the night. I shook my shoulders and strode toward the door Alton was holding for me.
***
Alton was going hard at the moms-love-me shtick. And I was trying. Hand to God, I was being a good sport. My mother thought he was he-lar-ious (her pronunciation of “hilarious”).
I’d ordered the mom approved quinoa salad, even though I wanted a bacon hamburger. She was delighted with my order. And my manners. And my pretending to listen to everything Alton was saying about sales and performance and his rise in the company. He sure did like to hear himself talk about himself.
I excused myself to use the ladies’ room, just to give my mind a break from the pressure of it all. Gustov’s was in an old building. It was referred to as vintage, but it was old. The bathroom was in the back, by the kitchen. It was a one-seater, so I was looking forward to a few minutes to gather myself.
As I stepped into the dark room and reached for the light switch, someone grabbed my wrist.
Before I had a second to get my bearings, or do anything other than gasp, I was in the bathroom with the door closed. It was as black as night and a strong man had his hand over my mouth.
I began to struggle, finally re
alizing this was bad, very bad. Yes, I was in public, but this bathroom was isolated—I might have been alone in an alley.
I could smell his body odor, and that was when I started to feel tears I had no time to form.
“You better keep your bitch ass silent right now.” His breath was laced with alcohol. Whiskey. I knew it was whiskey because that was one of my jobs. Jesus, was it a bar patron?
I nodded against his hand.
“You gonna stay quiet?” he hissed into my ear.
He was tall. I was trying to remember details, but in my mind I was straight screaming.
I nodded again.
“Okay. When I take my hand away…”
The second I had a breath I screamed at the top of my lungs, “Fire! Help fire!”
“Fucking bitch.” I felt the blow to the middle of my back and I staggered to the floor, my knees landing hard on the tile. I didn’t stop screaming “fire” louder than I ever thought my voice could be.
The door opened and shut. I saw brown boots, but that was all I could see.
My mother was in the bathroom fast. The panic in her voice freed my tears.
“Rebecca? Rebecca! Rebecca?” She was a mess. Somehow, she figured out the light switch and then she was on her knees. “Sweetheart, are you hurt? Talk to me.”
“I yelled fire. Like you told me when I was a kid. There was a man in here. There was a man in here with me.”
She pulled my head to her chest and I felt her hands exploring me for injuries like she did when I fell off my bike as a kid.
“I’m okay. Just shaken. I’m okay.”
The whole kitchen staff was in the bathroom with various things to put out a fire. My mother waved them off. “No fire. A man was attacking her. Call the police. You call the police right now. My baby was attacked by a man.”
I stood slowly. My slight mother was a bear in that moment. She was ready to fight the whole world.
She drove me crazy, but I loved her and she loved me. I wrapped her in my arms from behind.
“Oh, Becca. Sweetheart.” She turned in my arms and hugged me again.
***
I was sleeping at my mother’s on her couch. She wanted me with her, and I wanted to be with her. We needed to circle the wagons, as she called it. We were going to pop popcorn and watch some sappy movies.
The police had taken my statement and promised to look at security cameras. I told my mom about the bad feeling I had the night before and in the parking lot of Gustov’s. Alton had stuck around for a surprising amount of time, eventually leaving when my mom promised to text him some updates.
“We women have to trust that feeling. No matter how weird or uncomfortable it makes a social situation. I’m proud of you for yelling fire.” Mom sat right next to me, even though there was room on the couch for us to sprawl out.
“You always said that was better than shouting help.” I picked out a piece of popcorn with a lot of butter.
“No one jokes around about fire. Fire isn’t funny. I’m glad you yelled. I’m glad he didn’t get to hurt you.” She tucked a stray strand of hair behind my ear.
“Me too. It was so isolating in that bathroom. I hope they find him.” I looked in her face.
“You know me. I’ll stay on their ass so much they’ll need a proctologist to get me off.” She took a piece of popcorn too.
I smiled. This relationship I had with my mom was complicated but I was glad she was here.
11
HOOKERS
Fenix
Having Animal with me for this meeting was both good and bad. I liked to work alone. I knew I only had my life to gamble with. And I knew he could manage himself and anyone else. But still. He was half a human taller than me and tough. But I was crazy. And that made me unpredictable. It was hard to have a plan when I rarely followed one. That was part of my success at what I did. I took insane risks.
We were both on our bikes and there is a kinship with that. I nodded at him at a stoplight.
It was a dark night, the clouds cloaking the moon and all the light it normally offered. My favorite conditions were at midnight. Dark to me was my safe color. When I was younger, I sought it out. When my father couldn’t find me, he couldn’t get to me. And sometimes I used that dark to save myself when he beat my mom. I felt the shame of that rise through me. I exhaled and focused.
I was fucked up in the head. Centering myself took a few miles of my bike road-eating. But I was able to picture Christina, the only reason I would meet this old bag of bricks. In my mind’s eye, I saved the moment she’d called me her superhero. I tried to make my spine as strong as hers—surviving all those surgeries despite it all. Her grandfather was a problem. I wasn’t sure what kind of problem, but I didn’t like it.
Animal and I took a side street and then another. We found the ladies of the night who were extremely happy to see us as we cut our engines in front of them.
I let Animal take the lead.
“Which girl wants to earn tonight?”
“I can grab your ankles with my tits.” The lanky brunette with purple streaks in her hair gave Animal a salacious wink.
“What’s your name, princess?” Animal looked her up and down.
“Helena.” She licked her lips. The scent of her maple perfume wafted through the night.
A brash blonde pushed her way in front of Helena. “No, how about me? I can hold a brown crayon in my butthole.”
I watched Animal’s face change as he tried to process what the old whore had uttered.
“I’m Debra.”
Helena smiled at Debra like she’d made sense. “She really can.”
Animal furrowed his eyebrows and then pointed to the quiet one in the back. “You. You up for this?”
Helena waved the woman forward. “She’s shy. Her name’s T.”
T came from the shadows with dark hair covering half of her face. She nodded at Animal but said nothing.
“That’s the one. We’ll use her.” Animal pulled out his extra helmet and held it out to her.
She wouldn’t take the helmet, but stood close.
“You want the price?” Animal asked her.
T lifted an eyebrow.
“Two hundred dollars for about two minutes’ work.” He thrust the helmet closer.
T looked at his crotch and then back at his face with a smirk.
“It’s not that kind of work. How can a woman who says nothing be a wise ass?” Animal smiled at her.
T shrugged.
“Two minutes’ work? I could do that!” Debra stomped her high-heeled Croc.
Helena snorted. “You sure? Your work ethic is suspect. Maybe if you had a break between each minute.”
Debra turned on the taller hooker with a vengeance. “You want to see the crayon trick again, Canada?”
Helena was not intimidated. “You want to show me again, don’t you, eh?”
Debra became eager. “Sort of.”
T put out her fist and both girls bumped it. “Stay safe, T.”
After the girls disappeared into the alley, T pulled antibacterial gel out of her bag and wiped down the fist that had had contact. Then she slipped on the helmet and got on the back of Animal’s motorcycle like she’d done it a million times.
I trusted Animal’s judgment. We took her to a better part of town to explain what we needed her to do.
I handed her a piece of paper. “You give this to the old man with the silver hair. Then you get out. Just walk away. Don’t talk to them—which you seem to be good at.”
Animal handed her one hundred dollars. “The rest I’ll give you after you do the job.”
T took the money and tucked it in her jeans pocket. Then she held her hand out to Animal and waited.
“What? That deal doesn’t work for you?” He stared her down.
She didn’t flinch. Just waited.
“Nerves of steel, T? All right. All right. I respect that.” Animal handed her another Benjamin.
T put the next bill in
her pocket and then set her backpack down. She pulled out a Glock 26 and a handful of bullets.
“Shit,” Animal noted.
I looked at him with wide eyes. T wasn’t a typical hooker.
She loaded the gun and checked it before sliding it in her waistband.
After handing Animal her backpack and narrowing her eyes at him, he responded, “You want me to hold onto this? Okay. I can meet you back at your streetlight after you pass the message.”
T’s jaw twitched. She had dark brown eyes, now that I could really see her. And she was collected and calm.
She had the demeanor of a stone-cold killer. I was starting to like her a little.
Animal explained quietly which path in the park to follow and what Bat Feybi looked like. We were off to the next location as soon as T disappeared into the dark.
We took our bikes across the street and into the underpass. Animal would be armed and hidden out of view. If anyone other than Bat came walking up, Animal would take that person’s life. The note that T was to give the man instructed him about how to get here and to come alone. He could be armed if he wanted, but no cell phone, no wires. I would give him five minutes, and his men could pick him up in ten.
There were four different ways out of this location, and I was armed with everything I liked to bring on a mission. I took off my helmet and slipped on my ski mask. I didn’t like to flaunt my skull tattoo, because I liked to keep all the mystery alive. It was the safest way to do business. If things went according to plan, no one would see Animal.
I stretched my back before touching all my different weapons. I felt my phone buzz, and I frowned. I would miss a session with Becca. She was accessing the app. She’d see a few videos of me playing the claw machine, and then the repairs needed sign would pop up for a while, then back to videos. I was getting antsy. I wanted to finish this and get somewhere to monitor the game. She needed a fix, and I wanted to be the one to provide it to her.
I felt butterflies in my stomach thinking about meeting her with my real face tomorrow. I didn’t think I had time to mentally prepare for it, but then I chastised myself because I had been watching her for years. I’d never be ready. I had to just do it.
Mercy Page 6