by Laura Riley
Seth grabs my hand, holding it tightly. I squeeze his fingers; I feel as excited as he does. “Lizzie, this is us.”
Seth’s about to raise his paddle in the air when someone calls from behind. “Three hundred and eighty.”
“I have three eighty, can I see three ninety?” the auctioneer calls.
Seth grabs my hand, our fingers laced around the paddle. He raises it into the air.
The auctioneer nods at Seth, and continues to raise the offer. The higher the price goes, the fewer people raise their paddles. Painfully long seconds separate each new bid.
“Can I see five hundred thousand?”
Seth looks at me—for luck? Reassurance? I have no idea, but I nod.
“Last one, Lizzie.” Seth raises the paddle above his head. His pulse flickers in his neck, his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows, and there’s a sprinkling of sweat across his brow. Well, I’ll be damned, he’s nervous. If he doesn’t get this property, we’ll leave empty-handed. I know he feels pressure from Cole to come home with something, and I know how much he has his heart set on this property. My hands are clammy. I rub them down the material of my jeans before crossing my fingers.
The room falls silent after Seth’s bid. I’m holding my breath, too nervous to breathe. Seconds feel like minutes, and minutes feel like hours. Come on.
The auctioneer’s glance sweeps the room one final time. “Okay. In that case, going once.”
Seth’s hand snakes around my shoulders.
“Going twice.”
His arm tightens, pulling me into him.
“Sold to the gentleman in the sixth row.”
Seth pulls me into him, my head against his chest. His heart is pounding, and it dawns on me that this is the first time I’ve heard his heartbeat. I can feel him start to pull away. God, no, not yet, I want to bask in our closeness a little longer.
He cups my face in his hands. “I needn’t have worn my lucky shirt. You’re my lucky mascot.”
In that case, take the shirt off.
I’ve not got the confidence to say that aloud. I’m about to reply when he kisses me without warning. His lips crush mine. Our breaths dance as our lips become one. I’m unsure if I should pucker up, if I should part my lips to allow his tongue to seek out mine. His eyes are closed, which tells me there’s more to this than a quick celebratory peck. Wishful thinking on my part, perhaps, but is it wrong to want him to want me?
In my head the kiss lasts a lot longer than it does in reality. He pulls away and punches the air. “We did it.”
Seth
Fuck, yeah!
I fist-pump the air again. I want to kiss Lizzie again, but shit, if I go in for round two I won’t stop kissing her.
I do all the official shit when the auction is over—hand over my ID, give our business account details. I hold Lizzie’s hand as we leave. I’ve got my house and my girl.
Stop, rewind. Not my house, not my girl. Not yet. I wanted to speak to Cole before I told Lizzie how I feel, but I can’t contact him. His phone doesn’t even ring out when I call. It goes straight to voice mail, and he deserves better than a recorded message.
With each step we make towards the café, towards the car park and my van, I feel like I’m going to explode.
Once in the car park, I circle her wrists and pin her against the van.
Her doe eyes go wide as I unintentionally wind her. “Seth.”
“It’s no good.” I take a deep breath. “When the job’s been signed off, I’d like to still see you. I need to still see you.”
Her mouth drops open. “But I thought—”
I place my index finger to her lips. “It’s just a meal, don’t make more of it.”
I don’t mention that our meal will be in the most expensive restaurant in town. I want to strut in with her on my arm. Not only is she beautiful, she’s clever, intriguing, she’s great with my daughter, she’s perfect. She somehow completes the fucked-up mess that is my heart.
She shakes her head. “Do you mean as friends?”
I push my body into hers, my groin pressing into her. My cock is throbbing so damn much it’s in need of release. “Does it feel like I want to be your friend?”
She looks down at the fabric that separates us.
“No, Lizzie, I’m done pretending. When the work is finished and you are no longer my client, I am going to take you out”—I push my cock closer, pressing it harder into her stomach. She groans—“we are going to have an amazing night”—I move her hair away with my nose and bite her earlobe. She trembles—“and then I’m going to fuck you so damn hard you won’t be able to sit down for a week.”
“Seth—”
I release her. “Do me a favour.”
She nods.
“On the drive back can you sit by the window, please? I can’t have you sitting right next to me, not now.”
As requested, Lizzie occupies the adjacent window seat. It goes without saying that I make things incredibly awkward during the journey home, which of course is spent stuck in traffic.
The satnav shows a road closure ahead. I’m guessing it’s roadworks or a collision. Either way, we will be delayed for a few hours.
Great.
I can feel her gaze on my profile, and as I turn to face her, she looks away.
The traffic isn’t moving. The van’s stationary. I pull up the handbrake, reach across, unfasten her seat belt, grab her jeans and pull her towards me.
“Much better.” I say, switching on the radio. Whereas I relax, she sits bolt upright. Her chest rises and falls—good, she’s still breathing—but I can’t see her seat belt.
My bad.
Reaching over her, I yank the seat belt free, then work it down. With the metal fastening between my fingers I pull it slowly over her shoulder. She shivers when I move it down between her breasts and past her pelvis where I finally clip it in. “There. All safe.”
She doesn’t speak, she doesn’t even look at me. I tap my fingers on the steering wheel. Maybe I’ve misread the signs and she doesn’t like me, in which case I’ve made a complete twat out of myself.
I turn the volume down on the radio, shuffle around on the seat. “If I’ve misread the signals, please accept my sincere ap—”
“You haven’t,” she mutters, her gaze locked on her hands, which are fidgeting in her lap.
“Then why are you so damn quiet?”
She laughs and then shrugs. “I don’t know.”
I take her hand and place our entwined fingers in my lap. Her hand is inches away from my groin. God, I want her fingers wrapped around my cock. Her arm is so bloody tense, it feels like one wrong move and it’d snap right off.
“Relax, Lizzie.”
She sucks in a deep breath. “I’m trying.”
What we need is an icebreaker. The traffic is at a standstill. I stroke my fingers down her cheek.
She closes her eyes at my touch. “Is this real?” she whispers.
I loop my fingers around her hair and tug her closer to me. “We’re about to find out.”
I stop when our faces are inches apart. Her gaze is fixed on mine. She bites her lower lip. “Hi.”
“Hi,” I say back. Batting my eyes, I pucker up. I’m trying to inject a bit of humour into a moment I can clearly see she’s overthinking.
It’s not an equation, Lizzie. Get out of your thoughts and let’s kiss already.
We sit for a beat, our breaths the only things that are intimate. She nods, as if winning the war raging in her mind. Shutting her eyes, she closes the distance between us. Her lips brush against mine. I push into her, cementing our union, our lips as one. She’s shaking, she’s nervous. I keep cool and go at her pace. The kiss is slow. Her hand finds its way to my cheek, my hand cups the back of her head. I’m dying to deepen the kiss. Damn, I want to take all she has to offer, to bite, to suck, to tease. Without meaning to I nip her lower lip. I’m about to pull away and apologise when her teeth press down on mine. I crack open an eye. She’s
looking at me, a mischievous glint in her eyes. She’s following my lead, and if she wants to learn, I am happy to teach. I’m about to push my tongue into her mouth when our kiss is interrupted by the beeping of horns.
I break our kiss. The traffic is moving slowly. I push the van into first gear and crawl forward to join the traffic. Lizzie’s hand rests on my thigh. I know she can’t miss the bulge in my jeans, but she doesn’t touch it. I want her to touch it. It dawns on me that her actions are tentative—she isn’t comfortable making the first move. I wonder if she’s had many, if any, sexual partners. It’s not something I can just ask her, is it? I can’t rush her, I won’t rush her, but when we fuck, I know the earth will move.
We don’t talk for the remainder of the journey; I look her way and she looks out of the window. When I do catch her gaze, the smile she gives me is amazing.
I watch Lizzie’s ass as she exits my van and makes her way up her drive. I power-walk to her side and walk her to her front door.
She places the key in the lock. “I enjoyed today.”
I step closer to her. “Me too.” I wrap my arms around her waist and pull her into me and we share a cheeky kiss.
We break away and I brush my thumb over her lower lip. “See you tomorrow.”
I don’t rush home, nor do I drive slowly. I look at all the surroundings as I drive, thinking how much clearer I’m seeing, and for the first time in a long time I feel as though every aspect of my life is good.
I pull onto my street. A red car is parked next to Darcy’s on my drive—Anna’s red car. I yank the handbrake up and run into the house.
My heart’s racing, and I grab the banister. “Ellie. Ellie!”
She isn’t ready to see her mum. Anna’s caused way too much damage to just walk into Ellie’s life when she feels like it. No movement from upstairs. I run into the kitchen.
“Ellie,” I call again. “Ellie!”
Darcy enters the kitchen with a cup of tea in her hands. If she weren’t a woman, I’d wring her damn neck.
“Why have you let that fucking bitch into my house?” I say between clenched teeth.
Darcy’s hazel eyes go wide. “Seth, I—”
“Because this fucking bitch is Ellie’s mum, and I have a right to see my daughter.” Anna stands in the open door, her hand over her stomach.
Ignoring her, I turn to my sister. “Where’s Ellie?”
Darcy attempts to hold my arm, which I shake free from her embrace.
“Seth, it’s okay,” Darcy tries to reassure me, but fails. “Imogen took her out for ice cream.”
I feel slightly more at ease that my younger sister has Ellie. I glare at Anna, then focus back on Darcy. “Did Ellie see her?”
Anna pouts. “Excuse me? She has a name.”
I scrunch up my nose, looking over her body and her huge baby belly. “I can think of a few.” I can feel the venom dripping off my tongue.
Darcy waves her hand in front of my face. “No, I told Anna to go for a drive and return when Ellie had gone.”
My heartbeat begins to slow and return to normal. I grit my teeth. “And she’s still here? What does she want?”
“Seth, I’m right here, you know.” Anger laces Anna’s voice.
I wave my hand in the air, dismissing her comment. “Tell me what you want, then get out of my house and out of our lives.”
Anna’s heels click against the tiles as she enters the kitchen, placing the mug she’s been drinking out of on the worktop. The stained red lipstick around the mug’s rim turns my stomach. Note to self: toss said mug into the bin.
“I’m moving to Australia,” she says after a long silence.
I make a cross on my chest and hail Mary. “Praise the Lord, there is a God.”
Anna places her hand on her hip. “I really think we should go and sit down in the lounge.”
I have no idea what she was expecting. For me to jump for joy that she’s here? For me to be sad she’s leaving? I’m neither.
How does she think this is going to go? Amicability? Discussing the child we created? I raise my hand. “Whatever you want to say can be said here.”
She does that thing with her nose, the little twitch she does when she’s nervous. She takes a deep breath, and I know I’m not going to like what she has to say. “Okay. I want ten thousand pounds.”
I fold my arms across my chest. She’s got a damn nerve. “On top of the seventy thousand pounds’ worth of gambling debt you left me with? We lost our home because of you.”
Anna couldn’t get a credit card due to her poor credit, so being the doting husband, I gave her mine. I was so busy looking after Ellie and working that I didn’t notice the statements no longer arrived in the mail—or rather they did, and Anna hid them.
“Ten thousand pounds and Ellie is yours. If you don’t cough up the cash, then I’m applying for full custody of Ellie and she’ll be coming with us.”
I take a step towards her, and she steps back. “You want to thank your lucky stars you’re a woman and pregnant.”
Her face is unchanged because she knows I wouldn’t lay a hand on her. She stands tall. “Ten thousand pounds, and you’ll never see me again.”
I narrow my eyes. “A hitman would accept less.”
Darcy steps between us. “Okay, I can see emotions are running high, let’s just put our foot on the brake a little bit.”
I glower at my sister. “I’d like to speak to Anna, alone.”
Darcy looks between us, and Anna nods. “I’ll be okay.”
I snort. “Of course you will, you’ve always made sure you were.”
Anna’s eyebrows draw in, but still she tells Darcy to leave us. Tossing her long blonde hair over her shoulder, Anna struts into the lounge. She wiggles her hips from side to side as she walks, as if she knows I’ll be looking at her ass. I’m not.
Taking a deep breath, I follow her into the lounge. She’s sitting on the settee, her shoes are off and her feet are spread across the cushions.
I look at her with disgust. “Do you mind?”
Ignoring me, she points to the easy chair opposite. “Please, sit.”
It hits me that the longer it takes me to hear her out, the longer she’ll be here. Blowing out, I do as she requested. “I’m listening.”
“Ten thousand pounds and I’ll relinquish all my parental rights.”
I snort-laugh. “Darlin’, you did that the moment you walked out.”
“In the eyes of the law I’ve done no such thing.” Her eyes leave me, and she begins flicking varnish off her nails. “Darcy tells me you’re taking my daughter to Disney World.”
I nod.
“Not if I don’t get my money.”
Is she for real? “And how do you plan to do that?”
“You can’t take my daughter out of the country without my consent.”
“I don’t need your consent for a week’s holiday.”
“You’re kidnapping her. You’ll hear from my lawyer.”
Evil, spiteful bitch. I know I’m within my rights, but she can make things complicated and I’ve not got time before we leave to sort legal stuff. “You’d deny our little girl her first holiday for ten thousand pounds?”
Anna’s stare meets mine.
“You’re bluffing,” I spit out.
“Are you sure about that?”
We stare at each other for a beat before she eventually gets to her feet. “It was nice seeing you, Seth. I trust you’ll make the right decision.”
She brushes past me, taking all the unanswered questions with her. I take her arm and she glances down at me. I stare up into a face I etched onto my heart—I memorised every scar, every freckle, the exact shade of her eyes. Looking at her now feels as though I’m looking at a stranger. “Why did you leave?”
Her hand makes its way to mine. “I told you when we got together that I wouldn’t be second best to anyone.”
Second best? What the hell is she talking about? She was my queen. “There was no one
else, only you.”
She looks away. “I’m not talking about another woman.”
“But then who—” It becomes clear the moment the words leave my lips, and I don’t believe the words that are about to leave my lips. “You were jealous of our daughter?”
A tear escapes her eye and trickles down her cheek. “The day she came along, it was as though I didn’t exist.”
“You had postnatal depression; Ellie needed me.”
“I needed you, damn it.” She sniffs, wiping her tears away.
“And I was there for you every minute, every second of the day. I took months off work so I could be there. But we had a baby who wasn’t going to feed herself, and bills that needed paying.”
She glowers at me. “You gave up on us.”
I shake my head. “You gave up on us. You refused to get help; I did the best I could. I was exhausted. I went to work seven days a week to make up the money we had lost. Darcy would stay with you till I finished. When I got home I waited on you hand and foot, I got up in the night to feed Ellie then got up the next day at six am to start the whole thing all over.”
Anna looks away, but she needs to hear this. I need to say it. “We worked through your depression, you got better. You told Darcy not to come over during the days, you insisted on doing the night feeds. Things were great with us, better than they ever had been. We were happy, weren’t we?”
Anna shakes her head. “No, Seth, you saw what I wanted you to see. I’d meet up with Barry, and he complimented me, made me feel beautiful.”
“Are you kidding me right now? I told you every day you were beautiful.”
“And then you’d focus all your attention on her. I was always going to be second best, and I could see that. I don’t know, maybe I missed the romance, missed the excitement.”
“Tell me, Anna, was it depression or boredom that split us up?”
She doesn’t meet my eyes. She can’t. With her eyes on the floor she continues. “Sometimes the things that are meant to bring you closer together end up tearing you apart. I loved you so much, Seth, I really did. But having her is the biggest regret of my life. I didn’t love her then and I don’t love her now. It’s her fault our marriage broke down.”