by Zoe Parker
He takes another step closer and waits, but I don't move. Then, he takes a few more steps, one at a time, until he is right in front of me. The boy drops to his knees and reaches his hand out, holding it over my head.
I look into his eyes, and although there is a little fear in them, there is more curiosity and intelligence than I anticipated. His soul is as pure as his mother's, so I slowly raise my head so that his hand is between my ears. He lowers his hand the rest of the distance until he is touching my head, stroking my fur gently as our eyes remain locked on one another.
"Maverick!" someone screams from the back door of the house. "Get away from him!" I jump up to my feet, making the boy fall onto his backside, as the younger of the two women that live with Gray comes running in our direction.
I back up several feet, but don't show any sign of aggression. I won't hurt the people that are important to Gray. The woman scoops up the boy and begins running back to the house.
"Wait, Attak!" the boy yells at the woman, who seems to be his aunt. He holds out his hand in my direction, and he looks over her shoulder as she runs, but she doesn't stop.
The door slams behind them and I hear locks click in place, creating a strong, but not an impenetrable barrier between us. I decided that I should leave, a little worried that the boy's aunt will return with a gun, not that it would do any good against me. But it stands to reason, that I wouldn't get anywhere with Gray as a wolf or the Keelut. I need to be a man if I wanted to earn Gray's trust, so I can finally find out what will make her smile without pain in her eyes.
Chapter Four
Gray
The back door slams, waking me up from a deep sleep. I reach over and turn the alarm clock around on the nightstand near my twin-sized bed to see that I'd only been asleep for a few hours. Sighing, I plop onto my back, resigned to the fact that it's time to get up for the day.
My sons, Jax and Mav share a room with me, their empty bunk beds pushed onto the opposite side of the wall. They have both gotten really good at getting up each morning without waking me ever since I started working the night shift at the diner. Those boys are incredible and deserve so much more than me for a mom. I can't even take care of them by myself.
When Anik died, Jackson was lost. He was a seven-year-old boy who did everything with his father. Jax was old enough to understand life and death and what it meant. He knew his father was never coming home again, but it was so hard to accept, that he began lashing out. He got angry, understandably, and the child I loved, grew up quicker than he should have. He took it as his duty to take care of his brother and me, even though he was only in first grade himself.
Maverick was only three, so he didn't understand what was happening. But being the sensitive, intuitive boy that he was, he knew that something was different and often looked for Anik whenever he usually came home from work. It was heartbreaking to watch him look for his daddy every day.
And me? Like Jackson, I was completely lost without Anik. I loved him so much, and he was my partner, not just in life, but everything. I felt like there was no me without him. I went through the motions every day, but I might as well have died with my husband, with all the emotion I showed. I don't remember even crying once.
The thing that broke me out of my trance was getting the phone call from Jax's school, saying he had gotten in a fight with two older boys on the playground that day. They said something about Anik, and Jackson lost it. My boy, my sweet child was in pain and lashing out while I was closing myself off from the world and everyone in it, including the two people that needed me the most.
Jissika, Anik's older sister called me, just as I got Jackson home that day from school. I now consider it fate that she called at the exact moment I needed her the most, and offered to let us come live with her and her grandmother, Yuka. I didn't accept it right away, but that night as I lay in the bed I shared with my husband, I felt myself closing off again.
I needed a change so I could be the mom my boys deserved, and I couldn't do that there in our tiny New York apartment. However, I didn't want my sons to forget about their father either. A new start while holding onto a piece of the past seemed like the best option for all of us.
The next morning, I called Jissika back, waking her up because I forgot about the time difference, accepted her offer and started making arrangements for our move. It took a little over a week, but I sold almost all of our stuff, shipped out the few things that we wanted to keep, and bought plane tickets to Fairbanks, Alaska for the three of us. Jissika picked us up at the airport, and immediately drove us to a used car lot so I could buy a truck before we made the six-hour trek north to the small town of Wiseman. I used most of the money I had left for the vehicle, but it was a necessary purchase to live in this part of the world.
That was two years, seven months, and eight days ago, and since then I have slowly come back to myself. I am becoming the mom that I was before I got the phone call that changed our whole existence.
Jissika works as a teacher at the local elementary school, so she helps me out with the boys most of the time, taking them to school every morning and watching them whenever I'm working. I don't know what we would do without her.
And Yuka, well Yuka loves my boys like she loved Anik. I may not be her favorite person, but I'm okay with that because I know that she knows that I'm trying to do what is right for them, even if I fail most of the time. She doesn't speak to me very often, but at least she doesn't give me hateful looks every time she sees me anymore. I call that a win.
I roll out of bed and grab another pair of socks from the tiny dresser in the corner, and put them on before walking out into the living room, taking in the chaos. Jax is looking out the window into the backyard, searching for something while Mav is crying frantically. Jissika is kneeling down in front of him taking inventory of his body. Yuka, well, Yuka looks as if she's praying while sitting in her easy chair in the corner.
"What happened?" I ask with my eyebrows furrowed. I make my way over to Maverick and Jissika, kneel down to the right of my sister-in-law, and turn my son in my direction.
"Mommy," Mav cries and wraps his little arms around me. "I was just petting the dog, and Attak wouldn't let me!"
"Dog? What dog?" I whip my head over to Jissika, my expression frantic. The only dogs here are sled dogs, but there are plenty of wolves in the area as well.
"It was a black wolf!" Jax harshly whispers from his place by the window, staring his brother down before looking back out into the snow-covered yard.
I look back at Jissika, waiting for her to confirm or deny Jackson's statement, and she lightly nods her head and sighs before getting up and walking into the kitchen.
"Maverick, what were you thinking?!" I exclaimed, pulling his arms from around my neck so he could see me. "We've talked about how dangerous the wildlife is here!"
Big fat tears streak down his cheeks. "I know, but he seemed nice. He let me pet him and he didn't growl or anything. He liked me, Mommy."
"Yeah, he liked you enough to make you his breakfast," Jax mutters.
"Jackson Kee!" I sternly say to my older son. "Now's not the time for sarcasm."
"But he was being dumb by petting a wolf, Mom! A wolf!" Jax holds out his hand in Mav's direction for emphasis.
Maverick pulls out of my hand and advances toward his brother. "I am not dumb!" he yells. "He was a nice animal!"
I jump up and run between the two boys, who are ready to pummel each other into next week. Before I could say something, Yuka stops praying and stands up.
"It wasn't a wolf," she softly replies and walks toward Maverick. She leans down and puts her hands on his cheeks, staring into his eyes intently.
"Anaanatsiaq, it was a wolf, I saw it with my own eyes," Jissika says to her grandmother.
"You know better than to believe everything you see," she chides, still not taking her eyes from Maverick's. "Our existence is so much more than black and white."
"Well, whatever it was, I think it
's gone," I say from the window that Jax was standing at earlier. The yard is lit up from floodlights, and there is no sign of a large black wolf. Not even a set of tracks in the snow.
"Irngutaq," Yuka says to Mav, "be careful. There are things that visit our world that are not of this world."
Maverick, looking upset again says to her, "You think my wolf isn't a real wolf?"
"It's not your wolf, dummy!" Jax exclaims.
"Jackson, go get ready for school," I tell him sternly, and point toward the hallway. He storms off groaning the whole way to the bathroom.
"He was nice, Mom, I swear!" Mav whines. Yuka lets go of my son and looks at me, waiting to see what I'll say.
"Okay, Maverick," I sigh. "Promise me that you won't go petting wild animals anymore. Please."
"Okay, Mommy," he replies. Mav sullenly walks down the hall toward the bathroom to finish getting ready for school with his brother.
"It wasn't a wolf," Yuka repeats from earlier. She stands upright and walks down the hall and into her bedroom, closing the door behind her.
Jissika and I looked at each other, and she shrugs her shoulders before continuing to make lunches for herself and the boys.
Chapter Five
Oki
When I left Gray's house, I decide to do the only other thing I'd been craving to do since the night before- hunt. Tracking down this James Wallis isn't hard since he makes himself extremely visible wherever he goes. From his loud vehicle to his even louder, more ostentatious house, it's not a hard one to miss. He'd make a terrible Keelut.
I follow him from town that evening and hide out along the edge of his property. Shedding my black wolf form, I transform into the Keelut and wait for my chance to begin the hunt. Becoming the monster always feels like the best and worst part of me. It's the reason I was made, after all.
As Keelut, I am never seen unless I want to be seen, and I decide to let this bad soul know that he is my prey. I don't have to wait long before I see him stumbling out his back door, obviously intoxicated.
The bad soul shuffles through the snow toward a shed not too far from the house. He is several feet away from it when I silently begin to creep toward him. There is a single beam of light shining out into the yard, right along the path that he is walking down, but otherwise, everything is bathed in darkness. Not a smart thing when you live in almost constant night for part of the year. I stay just outside the light and softly growl.
He turns around quickly, falling into the snow because of his lack of balance. My eyes glow red in the darkness as my growl gets slightly louder. James scrambles backward until his back hits the edge of the shed as I advanced toward him, one step at a time until I am completely covered in light.
He screams out in terror and reaches for the door of the shed. He gets the door slightly open when I lunge at him, merely missing his foot as he dives inside and slams the door. I missed him on purpose. I want to draw out this hunt for as long as possible. So killing him is not an option. At least not yet.
For hours, I growl and bang against the shed, hitting it at different points around the structure whenever he least expects it. When I'm sure he's well terrorized, I stop and hide back in the shadows, waiting. I'm not finished yet, but I want him to think I am.
After several minutes of silence, the door cracks open. James sticks his head out and looks around. Assuming I've given up, he gains a little courage and he runs toward the house as fast as he can. When he's within a few feet of the back door, I lunge at him again and snap at his heels. He gets inside just in time. He stares out the window at me, and I can tell he's feeling safe and secure when he's really anything but.
I disappear into the darkness, leaving nothing, not even a single footprint. I leave knowing that his nights are numbered and that the hunt as only just begun.
As I melt into the night, I feel the undeniable urge to see Gray. To be with her. I want to celebrate a good first hunt, but I feel as though the piece of humanity that I gained when I first saw her is beginning to slip away. I was numb for so long, living a life built on terror and death. My only need was to hunt, but now, I want more. I don't want the hunt to be all that there is of me.
Back in my black wolf form, I run through the wild snowy landscape faster than every other animal out here. I run towards Gray's house. Even if I were walking leisurely, no other creature would dare bother me.
When I approach Gray's yard, I see that her truck is not parked outside. She must be working since I know that it's late. I switch directions and head towards town. I change into my human form when I reach the road leading in, creating clothes and shoes as well. I have been around people enough to know that clothes are always needed whenever I interact with them. Humans tend to look at you strangely if you aren't wearing them, and I don't want to stand out too much.
The diner is close to the center of town, so I walk in that direction, down the sidewalk with my hands in my pockets. There are big windows that adorn the front of the restaurant so I can see her long before I reach the door.
Gray is wiping down the counter in front of her, and a strand of curly hair falls into her face. She pushes it back behind her delicate ear, and I wish I was the one to do that for her. The need to touch her, to be near her is greater than any need I've ever felt.
She looks up, catching me staring at her, and I notice that I have my hand on the door handle but I've made no move to pull on it. Gray grins at my awkwardness, making me smile in return. I've watched her so much over the last several months, I don't even notice things like time while I'm doing it. I could watch her forever and be completely happy, I realize.
I finally open the door and make my way into the diner. Gray walks around the counter and meets me in the middle of the dining room, putting her hands in her back pockets and takes in my appearance. I know that she likes it because her eyes darken and her lips slightly part as she looks me over. I can feel the attraction coming from her.
But then, she shakes her head and her forehead wrinkles in confusion. "Oki, where is your coat?" she asks. I look down at my clothing, and even though I am wearing a shirt, pants, and shoes, I realize I don't have on an outer covering.
"I forgot it," I quickly blurt out, "I left it in my vehicle." The lie rolls not so smoothly out of my mouth, but I go with it and smile anyway. It is obvious that she doesn't believe me, but she's too polite to call me out on it.
Gray smiles back at me and motions out toward the dining room with one hand. "Have a seat," she tells me. "The menus are on the tables. I'll be by in a few minutes to take your order." Then she turns and walks back behind the counter.
There is only one other man in the diner, and he is sitting at the counter waiting for her to refill his cup of coffee. She doesn't hesitate and picks up the coffee carafe as she walks by it. The man smiles up at her as she fills his ceramic mug, and I feel my hackles rise. Jealousy isn't something I have ever felt before.
I look to Gray and see that she's returned the man's smile, but there is no heat behind it. It is merely friendly. I relax and slide into the nearest chair, and pick up a menu. I pretend to study it even though I don't really care for English food all that much. It's never appealed to me, no matter how long I had been interacting with humans.
After a few minutes, Gray returns with a notepad and a pen. "What can I get for you?" she asks and looks at me expectantly. People don't come into a diner and just order water, especially more than once, so I decided to play along.
"What do you recommend?" I ask, playfully smiling.
She looks thoughtful for a moment, then says, "The burgers are good here. Although this time of night people usually order breakfast."
"Then I'll order breakfast," I reply and put my menu on the table with determination. She lightly laughs as my eyebrows furrow. Why is she laughing at me?
"What kind of breakfast food would you like?" Gray then asks. "Eggs? Sausage? Bacon? Toast?"
Realizing my mistake, I reply, "Yes. All of it." I smile widely to
try and come off playful rather than ignorant of human ways. I may have been around humans for a very long time, but I'm not completely familiar with them or how they act.
She laughs again. "I'll bring you a glass of water and some coffee while I'm at it. Okay?"
"Of course," I answer. I love her laugh, and I decide right then and there that I will do anything I can to hear it as often as possible, even appear foolish.
Her smile became bigger, and she goes to put my order in while I watch her. Everything she does is mesmerizing, even passing along a sheet of paper with my food order on it to the cook. I chuckle to myself at how infatuated I am over this woman when I feel someone watching me.
I look at the other diner patron to see him turn halfway around on his stool, staring at me with interest and a little bit of jealousy. I show my teeth and growl at him, making the man turn quickly back around. I chuckle again to myself because of how much I love doing that.
"Here you go," Gray says, placing my drinks down in front of me. She goes to walk away, but I gently grab her wrist. She turns back to face me, her eyebrows raised. "Oki, is there something else you need?"
I let go and motion toward the chair across from me. "Will you please sit? It's not too busy tonight, and I'd like to get to know you." I look at her hopefully.
She peers around the restaurant then back to me. "Okay," she says and pulls out the chair in front of me.
We sit there silently, both of us smiling when I notice that she seems to be waiting for me to speak. I was the one that wanted to talk, after all.
"Sorry," I laugh. "I'm not really good at this."
"Good at what?" she asks and leans forward, putting her elbows onto the table. Her flannel shirt gaps open at the top revealing the delicate curve of her breast.
My mind goes blank as I take it in, so I pick up the glass of water and take a sip. She doesn't catch on to what I'm looking at, and leans over further, putting her hand on my forearm.