by Brianna York
Fifteen
M
atthew halted his carriage in front of the bookshop that he and his sister preferred and leapt down. He helped his sister alight, and snapped his fingers at some boys standing hopefully a few feet away. There was a small scuffle amongst them over who was to earn the fare for holding Matthew’s horses, allowing Julian to reach the door first and push it open for Alex. With the horses cared for, Matthew followed them inside, wincing as a little bell gave notice of his arrival. He nodded familiar hellos to the friendly man behind the counter, then saw something of great interest and promptly made himself scarce. Alex smiled once more at Julian, then left him to his own devices. Finding himself all alone in the front of the shop, Julian found that he did not really know what to do with himself. Never avidly interested in literature, Julian had been in a bookshop on only a few occasions in his life.
"What genre do you prefer?" the bookkeeper asked Julian, noting the overwhelmed look on his face.
Julian started and stared at the man like a wild beast caught in a snare. “Oh, I do not like to read, Sir. I shall just go across the street to that store over there.” He backed up, tripping clumsily over the slight ledge of the doorframe before beating a hasty retreat across the street. The shopkeeper watched him for a moment, then, shaking his head, returned to what he had been doing.
“Matthew?” Alex called, wandering down the narrow aisles that smelled like dusty books. “Matthew?” she tried again. She walked around the corner. “Oh, there you are,” she said upon catching sight of her brother, with his head bent over a large volume. His bright hair gleamed softly in the dim light as he flipped slowly through the aging text he held in his large hands. Alex still had not gained her brother’s attention, so she placed her hand over the page he was skimming. “What, might I ask, have you found that is so totally absorbing?”
Matthew's head snapped up for a brief instant. "Oh. It's you." He returned to his reading. “I am not sure yet.”
“Which means?” Alex prompted. Matthew nodded, but Alex knew he had barely heard her. Heaving a frustrated sigh, she bent her knees a little and craned her neck so that she could read the spine of the book he held in his hands. "Shakespeare; Complete Works” she read aloud. “At least it is someone famous that has caused you to mistreat me like this.”
Matthew skimmed a last line, then snapped the book shut. "What?" he asked, then looking at the books in her hands, “Did you find a book that will suit?”
Alex rolled her clear blue eyes. “Just one of my favorite poets and a novel.”
“Oh,” Matthew nodded his head. “That’s marvelous. I was waiting for you to finally come to a decision.” He consulted his pocket watch. “It is now exactly fifteen minutes past the hour when ladies are to be at home.”
“And since when have you been so concerned with the rules, hmm?”
Matthew took her books, then paced quickly away. “Since my mother is at home.”
“I see,” Alex responded. “I can understand that. I am paying for those books, Matthew Hargreve.”
Matthew glanced back at her. “Nonsense. Consider them an advance wedding gift.”
“But Matthew,” Alex began.
“A gift,” Matthew cut in, setting the books on the counter and fishing out his bill fold. “Julian?” he called out as he handed over the correct amount. “Did you see where my brother went?” he asked of Alex. She shook her head and spread her hands. Matthew shrugged slightly in reply
“Perhaps I can be of some help?” the bookkeeper volunteered, a bit hesitant to join in the conversation. Matthew turned to regard the bespectacled man expectantly. “Are you looking for the young blond man that came in with you?” Matthew nodded curtly and the man went on, “He went outside onto the street.”
“Thank you very much,” Matthew said, and offered up payment for their books.
There was no sign of his brother immediately outside, and Matthew felt a small twinge of frustration. Julian was like a small child, following any whim that came into his head.
“See him?” Alex asked, joining her brother on the sidewalk.
“No. I...” It was then that Matthew caught sight of his brother’s white blond head as he stepped out of a shop further down the street. “Julian!” He called. Julian’s head snapped up at the sound of his brother’s voice and he hurried over to them.
“Hallo!” he called as he leapt up onto the curb in front of them.
“Why didn’t you tell me that you were leaving?” Matthew demanded.
Julian cocked his head to one side in consternation and frowned a bit. “I’m sorry. I have never liked books, you know, so I stepped outside to wait for you. I happened to see the sign of that little shop over there,” he broke off to point at the shop he had just exited. “So I went to look in it. You were busy, and I didn’t want to be in the way. I didn’t think there was any harm in it. Besides,” here his face lit up. “You haven’t seen what I’ve got.”
He extracted something that sparkled brightly from his waistcoat pocket. He dangled it from his fingers for Alex’s examination, and Matthew saw that it was a tiny, golden horse, so delicately worked and finely detailed that one could see each individual strand of wind-tossed mane and tail and the flare of delicate, golden nostrils.
“Oh, Jules,” Alex breathed, taking the delicate chain in her slim hands and fingering the little horse gently. “It is beautiful.”
“I thought that it looked very much like Duchess,” he informed Alex.
Matthew smiled fondly at his brother. “It’s very nice Julian.”
Julian nodded. “That’s why I bought it.”
Alex smiled at the tiny horse. It did in fact have something of the look of her mare. “It is lovely,” she told Julian with a smile, holding it out to him.
Julian shook his head as she held out her hand. “It is a wedding present.”
Alex flashed him a smile. Julian’s and Matthew’s gifts were perhaps the first pleasant things she had received due to her betrothal. “Thank you ever so much, Julian.” Julian glanced down at his hessians, embarrassed.
“Shall we go?” Matthew prodded, glancing up at the glowering sky that seemed to be threatening rain. They all piled into the carriage and Matthew clucked to his horses. Sighing, he glanced over at his sister’s slender hands that were currently clasped around Julian’s gift. Wan sunlight gilded the edge of the ring on her finger, making it flash with sudden fire and then dim. He had not said anything to her yet, despite the fact that he knew that Forrest must have officially proposed to her. He did not like the thought of breaking the obvious serenity of her mood, but he felt that he needed to know when the wedding was to be.
“You and Forrest have set a date?” he inquired softly, clucking to his horses once.
Alex closed her eyes for a moment, then nodded. “In four days.”
Matthew nodded slowly in reply. “Would you like me to tell Mother?”
He felt her eyes on his face, but he stared straight ahead and pretended that he did not feel her scrutiny. Finally she said, “It may be cowardly of me, but I would greatly appreciate that.”
Matthew turned then and smiled fondly at her. “It is no such thing at all and I do not mind doing you that one small service.”
Alex smiled at her brother in thanks. She was beginning to feel that the situation was not nearly so hopeless as she had thought it earlier. She knew that things would sort themselves out, one way or another, but she would rather that the way in which they did so was to her liking.
Sixteen
M
atthew was the not the sort of person who regretted time spent by himself. He never minded a few moment’s peace during which he could turn his scrutiny inward. Always highly introspective, he found it necessary to maintain a running tab of his own mistakes and follies. He was a man who never failed to learn from his mistakes, and he never repeated them. He had always failed to understand those with poor judgement or loose morals. Matthew had never suffered
from self-consciousness in difficult situations due to his matter-of-fact honesty with himself and the honesty that he expected in return from those around him. Each individual situation was merely a compilation of possibilities that his agile mind organized into numerous possible solutions that he could choose from in order to deal with the matter at hand. This was true no matter how big or small the decision should happen to be. His was an orderly mind, one that worked efficiently and impersonally.
The last few days, however, Matthew had found his hours alone were filled only with a yearning for the sound of Theresa Dartmoor’s voice or the simple balm of her presence. Nothing had ever before gotten in the way of his work with his horses, and he was not a little amazed and frustrated when thoughts of her interfered with every aspect of his life. He was beginning to realize that the only way he would have any personal peace was if he married her.
He slowed his winded horse to a walk before leaning forward to slap Apollo’s gray neck fondly. As he rode toward Grosvenor Gate, he chuckled to himself. Two weeks ago if someone had suggested marriage to him, he would have scoffed at the idea.
“It’s a strange turnabout, Apollo,” he said to his horse as he rode out of Hyde Park and onto Park Lane, “to be considering marriage.” The horse snorted softly, as if in agreement and Matthew smiled. “You agree then,” he said, patting the horse’s neck again.
His thoughts wandered away from Tess for the moment, and settled on Alex and her troubled romance with Forrest. Forrest was usually highly decisive, the first to cut his losses and move on or to jump headfirst with wholehearted enthusiasm into any new venture that came his way. However, it appeared that having begun his courtship of Alex in such a fashion and meeting with disastrous results, he was now determined not to do anything at all other than the bare minimum expected of him. Alex’s chilly pride was not making the situation any easier to untangle. Matthew rode into the stable yard and jumped down from his horse as William emerged from the stables.
“How was he?” William asked as he slipped the reins over the stallion’s head.
“Brilliant, as always,” Matthew replied, holding out a hand for the horse to search briefly with velvety lips. “Is the Baron still out?” he asked of his coachman and received a nod in return. Matthew nodded. “Nice to have someone else riding Deuce regularly,” he said with a chuckle.
William grinned in reply. “Indeed it must be,” he agreed. “For such a beautiful horse, he makes it miserably hard to like him.”
Matthew laughed at that. “He does indeed.” He patted Apollo’s neck one last time, then turned and made his way into the house. Once inside, he went to the music room and took out his flute. He had just begun to play, when he heard a horse enter the alley behind the house. Crossing the room to look out the window, he saw Forrest swinging down from Deuce.
Speak of the devil, Matthew thought wryly, then returned to his playing. He noted that Forrest must be in something of a hurry if the amount of time it took him to reach the music room was any indication. Hoping for a turning point, or at least a development of some sort, Matthew continued to play as his friend’s footsteps echoed in the hall, then halted before the door into the music room. There was a brief pause, then a sharp, insistent knock.
“Come in,” Matthew called.
Forrest pushed the door open, and nodded to Matthew tersely. “Hello,” was all he said before he shut the door again.
“Drink?” Matthew said instead, not wanting to discuss his sister right away.
Forrest cocked a brow at that and nodded. Without further ado, Matthew set down his flute, rose and went to the drink cabinet. Forrest settled uncomfortably into one of the chairs scattered about the music room. The mutual hush remained intact as Matthew slopped some port into a glass for his friend. The sound was unnaturally loud when it reverberated off the silence, and Forrest realized how tightly strung he was.
“Forrest,” Matthew began once he had handed the other man his glass, “I think that we need to discuss matters.”
“Matters?” Forrest asked carefully concealing his wariness. Matthew could be touchy at times, and Alex tended to be a sticky matter on all occasions. It was of no consequence to him that his own motivation for this visit was to discuss Alex. He had always admired Matthew’s knack for reading people, but he found that he rather resented his friend’s skill when it concerned his own private problems. There was no one that he would rather have confided in on any other occasion and Matthew was the master of unbiased evaluation, but Forrest suddenly found himself incapable of trusting his friend.
Matthew nodded, his gaze intent. “Matters that concern Alex.”
“Such as?” he asked nonchalantly.
Matthew produced the reaction Forrest had expected as his eyes narrowed. “What are you being so bloody cold and contemptuous for? At least do me the courtesy to act as if you know what you came here to discuss!”
Forrest chuckled finally, but the sound was tight and a bit off-key. “Ah Matthew! You always come right to the heart of the issue without hesitation.”
Matthew cocked a brow skeptically. “Would you prefer me to beat around the bush, Forrest?” His tone indicated that the question was rhetorical.
Forrest opened his mouth to answer, then closed it with a hard click. “Matthew, we are the closest of friends, are we not?” At Matthew’s nod he sighed and went on. “Then let us not bicker over something that is done and over with.”
Matthew nodded reluctantly. Forrest sighed and toyed with the glass in his hand, allowing his mind to wander over what he wished to say.
“Marriage should be a partnership, not a one-sided bargain,” Forrest said finally. “And it most certainly should not be an enforced bargain.” He sighed and closed his eyes briefly. “You must understand how the situation is. Alex is richer than I am, old man. And she is a Beauty, an Incomparable. She is the most unapproachable woman I could pick to form an affection for and now her husband to be will be labeled a fortune hunter and a contemptuous mushroom.”
“That is fustian and you know it, Forrest. The gossips will enjoy themselves at your expense for a few months and then move along to some new and exciting gossip.” Matthew cocked a brow at his friend. “Isn’t the fact that she is so unattainable the very thing that makes her worth attaining?”
Forrest grinned ruefully. “Touché.”
“Really, Forrest,” Matthew said, shaking his head, “I still do not understand how you cannot see how much she does love you. She is frustrated and frightened, but she will recover from both things and be more than happy to be your wife.”
Forrest looked down, toying with the signet ring on his right hand. “One does not push a woman like Alex. Besides, I have a surfeit of self-worth to satisfy. Her inheritance of the stud farm at East Gate alone would place her rather well out of my meager reach no matter how one looks at it.”
“This is ridiculous.” Matthew waved the absurd notion away with his hand. “Have you told Alex how you feel? If she knows that you love her, she won’t care about the gossip or your title or your ‘surfeit of self-worth’ as you put it.”
Forrest shook his head. “It is not that simple. She must come to love me because she wants to, not because she feels like she owes it to me as a long-term friend. I would marry a woman, not a sister.”
Matthew was frowning thoughtfully now, mulling that over. “You are making not a bit of sense, Forrest. I shall let it alone, lest I be driven to distraction by the inconsistency of your stance.”
Forrest rose from the chair and paced to the window that looked down on the busy street below and thought about Alex. What could he really do? So much was up to Alex, whether Matthew wished to see it in that light or not. Finally, he gave a mental shrug and turned back toward the center of the room. He did not speak right away, just stared at his friend. Matthew began to feel uncomfortable under the intensity of Forrest’s glare. Finally, “Perhaps you are right, old man. After all, you know her better than I do.”
; Matthew sighed in some annoyance. That was not the response that he had wanted to hear, but it could have been worse. “I know that I cannot make the situation right for you Forrest, but I wish I could.” He shook his head gently and a trifle sadly before glancing back at his friend.
Forrest’s expression did not alter. “I wish that you could too, my friend,” he said sadly.
Unsure exactly what to do, Matthew shifted in his chair. As if on cue, the music room doors sailed open, and Alex breezed into the room. She halted dead upon seeing Forrest. The light silhouetted his slim, athletic form sharply, and reflected off of his raven-black hair. Alex had seen him only yesterday, but she found that she could not drink enough of the sight of him now. She noticed how his eyes had gone sky-blue as soon as they caught sight of her, and they glowed at her through the dark shadows that had fallen across his sharp-featured face. She felt suspended in time, unable to move or act, or even coherently think.
She was beginning to feel desperate, fearing that she was dreaming or walking in her sleep. She could not bear it if she were to wake now and realize that her soul had created such a heinously vivid dream merely to torture her and remind her of how much was within her grasp and yet so far away. Forrest was the proverbial carrot on a string for Alex, and her nature was not much given to patience or suffering.
“Hello Alex.” Matthew’s voice was the lifeline that his sister desperately required, and she swam toward it frantically. The spell that had bound Forrest to her in helpless suspension shattered suddenly, leaving Alex free to move. And move she did, away from Forrest and toward Matthew. She stumbled into the chair that Forrest had vacated, all of her natural grace deserting her for the moment, and snatched the back of it to support herself. She knew that it was irrational to be so afraid of the person that you loved without reserve, but she was coming to realize that loving Forrest was not an easy thing to do.