by Katie Meyer
“Or nothing, you jerk. Let’s just go. Fast.”
He winked, and pulled her toward the parking lot. “Do you think we’d get in trouble if I used the lights and sirens?”
Chapter Fourteen
He’d been joking about the lights and sirens, but he did push the edge of the speed limit. He didn’t know what had led to Jessica’s change of heart about exploring the physical side of their relationship, but he wasn’t risking it changing back again. The whole drive he kept expecting her to tell him to stop, to turn around, to forget the whole thing.
Instead, she sat silently, her fingers anxiously drumming on the armrest while he rethought his decision to live on the outskirts of town. If he’d taken an apartment near the city center they’d be naked by now. At the third red light he muttered a curse against the traffic gods, eliciting a quick smile from Jessica.
“In a hurry to get somewhere, officer?” she asked, eyebrows raised in mock confusion.
He growled, and stomped on the accelerator as the light turned green. Jessica laughed, and his arousal kicked up another notch. By the time he swung the car into his driveway he was starting to wonder if a man could die from sexual tension. Thankfully, it seemed that he wasn’t going to find out today. Leaping out of the car he made it to Jessica’s door before she managed to release the seatbelt.
“Patience is a virtue you know,” she teased, letting him pull her out of the car.
“It’s been months, Jessica. I’m all out of patience.” To prove his point he pulled her against his body for a long hard kiss, letting her feel exactly how close he was to losing control. Rather than argue she returned the kiss, arching her neck to give him better access to her mouth. Damn, she killed him with the way she melted under his touch. If she was this responsive to a kiss, how much more passionate would she be in his bed?
But first, they had to get inside. Keeping one arm wrapped around Jessica he somehow managed to blindly shove the key in the lock and open the door. Once inside he kicked it shut and put both hands to work. He quickly yanked her shirt over her head, only to realize he still had the tank top and her bra to go. “You are wearing way too many clothes,” he growled against her neck as he tugged a strap off her shoulder. “I’m going to let the dog out, and when I get back I want you naked and in my bed.”
“I’m all sweaty,” she protested, even as she squirmed restlessly against him. “I should shower first.”
“Fine.” He spun her around in his arms and gave her a little push toward the bathroom. “That works too.”
Her eyes widened, but she didn’t argue. He heard the water start as he sent Goldie out to romp in the yard and his blood heated as he pictured her naked and wet body.
But when he entered the bathroom he found her waiting for him, still fully clothed, and when he reached for her tank top she backed away, hesitancy crossing her face.
“What is it? Do you need me to stop?” Dear God, it might kill him, but he would if she asked him to. He cared about her too much to ruin things by pushing too hard.
“No, it’s just...” Her face flushed and she looked over his shoulder at an invisible spot on the wall. “I don’t look like I did, when we were together before.” Her hand moved protectively to her belly. “I’m—”
“Stunning.” He supplied. “Gorgeous. Sexy as hell.” He reached out and placed his hand over hers. “Seriously, Jessica, you’re an incredibly beautiful woman who is carrying my child. That makes you more attractive, not less.”
She looked up, desire warring with doubt in her eyes. “I don’t know...”
“I know. Let me show you.” He stroked his hand up her body, lingering over her taut nipple. “Let me show you how much you turn me on.” He slid his other hand under her top, sliding it up to reveal her rounded belly. “Let me show you how much I want you.”
Wordlessly, she grabbed the hem of her shirt. At first he thought she was going to pull it back down, to stop things right there. Instead, she tore it off in one triumphant motion, and then, eyes bright with need, released the clasp on her bra, letting it fall to the floor. A second later she’d pushed off her remaining clothes and stood before him nude and even more perfect than he’d remembered.
“My God, you’re incredible.”
Removing his own clothes in record time he pulled her into the shower. Jessica laughed as the spray caught him in the face, and he laughed too, the earlier tension receding. “Turn around.”
“Why?”
“So I can wash your back.” He picked up a bar of soap and rubbed it, letting the lather fill his hands. Jessica grinned in understanding, and turned, giving him a whole new view to appreciate.
He took his time, exploring every inch of her perfect body with his soap-slicked hands while the water ran over them both. Never one to be passive, Jessica eventually turned and grabbed the soap, a wicked smile on her face. “My turn.”
No arguments from him on that, but he wasn’t turning his back. He wanted to watch her while she touched him. Her long dark hair streamed down over her breasts, and her skin was rosy from the heat of the shower. She was a goddess, and she was his.
Bracing himself, one hand on the cool tile, the other on the glass shower door, he let her have free rein. When they’d come together the first time it had been a rush of lust and need. Amazing, but over way too fast. This time he was going to savor every single moment.
At least, that was the plan before she started stroking and touching, her hands gliding and teasing, finding erogenous zones he didn’t know he had. Only when he was on the verge of exploding did he stop her. Shutting the water off he lifted her hot, slippery body into his arms and headed for the one place he’d wanted her since the very beginning.
For the last few months he’d enjoyed having her in his life but tonight, he’d have her in his bed.
* * *
Jessica clutched at Ryan’s shoulders as he carried her through the doorway to his room. She hadn’t been in there since that the day she’d moved in. She’d thought she had been turned on then, but that had been nothing compared to the inferno raging inside her now. Everywhere her skin touched his she burned, the heat surging through her and then pooling where she needed him most.
The sheets were a cool relief, momentarily easing the fever inside her and promising the wait for satisfaction was nearly over. Ryan positioned himself beside her, his dark hair curling in wet ringlets against his forehead. “Are you sure?” he asked, his voice taut with tension. “Because once we start it’s going to be damned hard to stop.”
“I’m not going to ask you to stop.” She couldn’t if she wanted to. Every part of her wanted—no, needed this. She needed the release, to forget all the stress of her pregnancy and her career. To feel truly alive instead of like she was just existing. She’d spent so long denying herself, trying to prove herself in school, at the academy, to the department, she’d almost forgotten who she really was.
But Ryan wouldn’t let her forget. And so when he reached for her, she didn’t hold anything back. All the fears and the doubt melted away as she opened herself, rising up to meet him. Just like before, they fit together as if they’d been made for each other, each instinctively knowing exactly how to please the other. But this time, she didn’t let herself dismiss the concept as a schoolgirl fantasy. Instead, she embraced the hope that they could make things work even as she embraced his body.
Because despite her best intentions, she loved him.
The realization, coupled with the sensations pulsing through her, pushed her right over the edge. Clinging to him for dear life, her body shook with the force of her release and left her breathless. Above her, Ryan tensed as his own climax pounded through him, her name on his lips.
It was perfect.
And utterly terrifying.
To her mortification, tears filled her eyes. Ryan, still braced above her, frowned in concern.
<
br /> “What is it? Did I hurt you? Or the baby?”
She shook her head, reaching up to swipe the traitorous moisture away. “It’s just hormones,” she lied. “You know how pregnant women get.”
He stilled her hand and traced a finger across her damp cheek. “I know exactly one pregnant woman—you. And you don’t cry for no reason. Don’t shut me out, Jessica. Not now. Not after this.” He rolled off her and pulled her into his side, cradling her body against his larger one. His hand gently stroked up and down her back, as if soothing a frightened animal. “Now tell me, what’s wrong? If I hurt you, I’m sorry. But I need to know what happened, so I can do things differently next time.”
Next time. Here she was having an existential crisis and he was planning their next romp in the sack. It was so stereotypical it would be funny if she wasn’t in the middle of a panic attack. Despite everything, she found herself chuckling.
“First you’re crying, now you’re laughing? Lady, talk to me. Tell me what’s going on.”
She sighed. “You didn’t hurt me. In fact, it was amazing.” That much was true.
He sighed, a satisfied smile on his face. “Amazing, huh? Then why the tears?”
Damn, he wasn’t going to drop this. And she wasn’t going to lie to him, not any more than she already had. Keeping the information about her inheritance a secret was already eating her up inside. Maybe once she’d said the rest of it, he could talk her out of it, tell her how ridiculous she was being.
“It’s just... I think I’m falling in love with you.” Her voice cracked, and another tear fell.
Ryan blinked slowly, and then he laughed. His body shook with it, vibrating the bed underneath them.
“It isn’t funny!” She elbowed him, not quite accidentally, as she sat up. “I know it’s probably just the pregnancy hormones, or the orgasm talking, or something. But you don’t have to laugh at me!” Angry at him, and at herself, she tried to get out of the bed. If she was going to make an idiot of herself she could at least do it fully clothed.
Ryan stopped her, pulling her against him. “I’m not laughing at you. Really, I’m not.”
She rolled her eyes. “Oh no?”
He turned her so they were facing each other. “No,” he repeated, his face serious now. “I mean, I’m not laughing at your feelings, anyway.”
“What then?”
“I’m laughing at how you made falling in love sound so terrible, like it’s a diagnosis of a terminal disease or something.”
“Isn’t it?” she muttered, even as she felt some of her earlier tension melting under his touch.
“I hope not. But if so, I guess you caught it from me.”
“Wait, what?” She searched his eyes for any sign that he was teasing her, and found none.
“I’m saying, if you’ll stop freaking out long enough for me to say it, that I love you. I have for a while now. I just was waiting for you to catch up.”
Her mouth dropped open. He loved her? “And you don’t think that’s a big deal?” He was talking about love as if he was discussing what color to paint the living room or what brand of trash bags to buy.
“Of course it’s a big deal. But in a good way. It’s not supposed to make you cry.”
“But this wasn’t the plan,” she sputtered, her mouth not quite caught up to her brain. “This was supposed to be temporary. Business. Not—”
“A relationship? Honey, you’re the one who insisted on all that. Not me.”
Her head spun. Yes, she’d known he was attracted to her, that they had chemistry. And yes, he’d talked about seeing where their marriage went. But love? Love changed everything. She’d always known exactly what needed to be done, and how to do it. But love? A relationship? She didn’t have a clue what to do with that. So she did the only thing that made sense, and the one thing she hated most of all. She asked for help.
“So what do we do now?”
* * *
Ryan grinned. “Well...”
Jessica smacked his chest in frustration, but there was the smallest hint of a smile on her face. Good. Seeing her cry killed him, especially when it was because of him.
“Men! Is that all you ever think about?”
“No—sometimes we think about food. Which is probably a better idea anyway. Then after we eat we can—”
“Talk,” she said, cutting him off before he could suggest a more pleasurable way to pass the time. “We need to talk about what all this means.”
He sighed. Talking didn’t sound like anywhere near as much fun. “Anyone ever tell you you’re bossy?”
“All the time. Now come on, you said you were going to feed me.”
Obviously being in love hadn’t made her any less the forthright woman he’d come to know. A good thing, as far as he was concerned. He loved that she was feisty, that she didn’t let anyone take advantage of her, even him. “Fine.” He stood, not bothering to do more than pull on a pair of jeans that were hanging on a chair. “Soup and sandwiches okay?”
She averted her eyes as he dressed, staring at the wall somewhere above his head. “Um, that sounds good. Just give me a minute to get dressed.”
“I think it’s a bit late for modesty, don’t you? We’re married, you’re carrying my child and we just had the world’s most amazing sex.”
She grinned. “Now who’s saying it was amazing?” But his words had the desire effect. Her shyness gone, she pulled off the sheet that had been covering her and stood, making him wish he’d been a bit less insistent on eating. The sight of her naked body couldn’t help but reawaken a whole other kind of hunger, one that was much more fun to satisfy.
Jessica noticed his obvious arousal and shook her head. “Down, boy. Lunch, then conversation.”
“And then...?” He waggled his eyebrows in what he hoped was an appealingly suggestive manner.
“Maybe. If you can control yourself while we eat.”
He’d be on his best behavior if it meant a repeat of what they’d just done. He could spend all day—for several days—making love to her and it wouldn’t be enough. He was going to need a lifetime to get his fill. And for the first time, he had real hope that he might get exactly that. Hearing Jessica admit she loved him was quite possibly the best moment of his life, even if the words had been said through tears. She might be terrified at the idea of making their marriage the real deal, but he had enough certainty for both of them. There was no way he was going to let her slip away again.
First he let the dog back in, giving her a good petting to make up for ignoring her earlier, then put together two sandwiches while Jessica put a pot of soup onto the stove. While it warmed he dug around in the fridge and found the pickles she favored and added a few to her plate. “Tea?”
“Please.”
He poured two glasses of sweet tea and joined her at the kitchen island where she’d filled their soup bowls. They ate in silence, Jessica apparently not quite ready for that conversation she’d insisted they needed to have. When the dishes were rinsed and stacked in the dishwasher and she still hadn’t said anything, he decided he’d better take the lead. The sooner they discussed whatever she was worried about the sooner they could do other things. Naked things.
“So, spill it.”
She flinched. “What do you mean?”
Man, she was more nervous than he’d realized. Was the thought of a relationship with him really that scary? “You know, there are worse things than being in love with your husband. Some people would actually consider it a good thing—especially when your husband’s head over heels for you.”
She made a face. “I’m guessing those people got a chance to figure out their feelings before the wedding, not afterward.”
“Fair enough.” He moved in closer, careful not to crowd her while she was in this mood. “We did things a bit out of order but that doesn’t have to chang
e the end result.”
“I don’t know. I mean, here we are, about to be a family, and we’ve never even been on a date.”
Was that what was bothering her? “Fine, so let’s do that.”
She blinked. “Do what?”
“Date. We can go to the movies, dinner, whatever you want.”
She smiled. “You’d do that?”
“What, spend time with my beautiful wife? Yeah, I think I could manage to suffer through,” he drawled.
She smacked his arm, and he grabbed her hand, pulling her into his arms. Snuggling close, she rested her head on his chest. Her inhaled, taking in the honey-apple scent of her shampoo, and tried to find the right words. “In all seriousness, in case you haven’t noticed, I’d do pretty much anything for you.”
She looked up at him, her eyes wide. “Why?” She wasn’t fishing for compliments—Jessica didn’t play games like that. She honestly wanted to know. So he told her.
“Because I love you. And before you ask why again, there are a million reasons. I love that you face down every challenge that comes your way, and never even consider backing down. I love that you are close to your family but don’t let them dictate how you live your life. I love that you are brave, and smart and most of all, how honest you are. Like tonight—even though it scared you, you were up-front with me about your feelings. So yeah, I love you, and I count myself very lucky to have you in my life.”
She stiffened in his arms and for a moment he thought she was going to argue. But she shook off whatever it was she’d been about to say, and pulled him down for a kiss. It seemed he’d been good after all, and it was time for his reward.
Chapter Fifteen
They spent the rest of the weekend making love. Well, that and eating. She was pregnant after all, and her appetite had become something of a running joke between them. Ryan had more than once asked if she was sure she wasn’t hiding a litter in there as no single child could possibly require that much sustenance. She’d have been angry, but he had a point. She did eat an ungodly amount. But the doctor said her weight gain was within normal for a first pregnancy, so she wasn’t going to worry about it.