She actually laughed, rolling her eyes. "Yeah. That, too." She paused and then shook her shoulders. "Anyway, I realized after seeing my grandmother that you had no shot in the Long Mesa pack. I knew I earned my omega status. I betrayed the pack, and I could own up to my mistakes. But, usually, there are ways for an omega to work their way up in the pack ranks. I knew you would never be allowed to be part of the higher ranks of the pack, but assumed that as you got older, you would be able to establish your own place in the hierarchy. Especially since you're a female."
I snorted. "Yeah. That was never gonna happen."
She nodded. "Which I realized after talking to that old shrew. They would always keep you down. And even if you got pregnant in the omega house, odds are they would take your child or sentence it to the exact same fate. So, I decided to get you out. I was trying to figure it out, watching the guard shifts at night when Linden caught me."
I sucked in a sharp breath.
"He told me in no uncertain terms that you and I were pack property. If they ever caught me trying to escape - with or without you - that the guards had orders to shoot you on sight or rip you apart. Whichever they wanted. The next day, the drain was filled with cement and closed off for good. It’s part of the reason why the eastern part of the compound floods when there’s a storm."
She looked at me again briefly. "I wasn't going to risk your life. I knew we had at least a decade to figure something else out. I was working with Zara on a plan to get you out before you turned eighteen."
"Get us out, you mean," I corrected.
"No, honey. Just you. I didn't think I could get us both out. Besides, all that has ever mattered is keeping you safe."
I growled. "And leave yourself to that psycho? To those assholes? Great freaking plan, Mom."
"Hey!" She snapped, her green eyes flashed with irritation. "You don't get to judge. I was doing everything I could to keep you alive.”
"What about my father?" I demanded.
Her eyes flashed with warning. "We aren't discussing your father." Her knuckles turned white on the steering wheel.
Shocker.
"We never discuss my father," I snapped back. I should have stopped then. I knew I should stop, but this had been on my mind for seventeen years. "Why didn't you go to him for help?"
Her teeth clenched together. "It wasn't possible."
"And now? Why don't we go to him for help?" I pressed.
"It's still not an option." Her nostrils flared and she kept her eyes glued to the road in front. "Drop the subject, Skye. It's not open for debate."
"Why? Why not?" I kept pushing.
"He doesn't even know you exist!" She finally yelled. The silence that followed filled the car like a physical being.
"He doesn't know I exist?" I parroted back hollowly.
She shut her eyes briefly, huffing. "No. And believe me when I say it's for the best. Long Mesa is nothing compared to the world your father came from. It was … something that could never happen. I was an idiot to even think it could work. That night was a stupid moment of weakness from a silly girl who thought she knew love could conquer all."
"A stupid moment of weakness," I repeated softly, turning to stare out the windshield. "So, I was just the result of your stupid moment of weakness?"
"Yes," she replied vehemently. "You were the only good thing that came out of that night. The only good thing in my entire life. I would endure a million more stupid moments of weakness if it meant I got to be your mother. I might regret a lot of things where your father was concerned, but you need to really hear this, Skye: I have never for a second regretted having you."
I blinked back tears, not realizing how much I needed to hear that. The raw emotion in her voice created a fissure in my heart. I knew she loved me. I had always known that.
"Do I hate that I pulled you into this twisted world? Absolutely. But I will never, ever be sorry that I had you. That I was able to raise you. I'm just so damn sorry that you've had to endure all you have these last seventeen years." She swiped at her eyes with her fingers. "You're my world, baby girl. I love you."
I sniffled and glanced at her. "I love you more."
A small smile played on her lips as she turned the car down a side road. "I love you most."
She took another turn onto a dirt road and drove a few minutes more before she stopped the car. I looked up to find a woman and a man standing several feet away beside a gray sedan in the middle of the clearing in front of us. They straightened as they saw us.
"We're here," Mom said, turning off the engine and giving me an encouraging look.
Here goes nothing.
Stepping out of the car and into the lush woods of Washington was mind blowing. My senses were immediately assaulted by new sounds and scents. I felt my wolf perk up. She wanted to explore this new landscape, wanted the feel of the soft earth under her paws. It was so different from the arid, dry place we had left behind. It was still mid-September, but here was a chaotic world of colors, cool breezes, and waning sunlight.
I closed the door and met Mom's gaze across the roof of the car. She smiled, her eyes full of hope. Taking a deep breath, I walked around the front of the car with her, falling into step slightly behind her to approach the man and woman ahead of us.
The woman's face broke into a beautiful smile as we approached, her teeth bright white against her dark skin. She looked fit and strong, her head high and shoulders set back. There was a striking confidence to her I couldn't help but be drawn to even dressed in jeans and a flowing blouse. "Welcome, friends," she greeted. She seemed to hesitate for a second, but then reached forward with a laugh to hug my mother.
"It's good to see you, Zo," my mom said, hugging her tightly.
Zoe pulled back and glanced at me. Her hazel eyes ran up and down me as she shook her head slowly. "My God, is this Skye?"
Mom turned and smiled at me. The pride in her gaze made something flutter in my chest. "Yes. A little different from the last time you saw her, huh?"
Zoe's eyes sparkled as she lifted her brows. "The last time I saw her, she was naked and dipping her crackers in desert sand before eating them."
Mom's head dropped back and she laughed loudly. "I forgot she used to do that."
"I used to eat ... sand?" I blinked, stunned. That didn't sound appetizing at all.
Zoe winked. "It was a phase. Didn't last long." She reached her hand back to the man with her. His green eyes were shining as he watched her. He laced their fingers before raising her hand to kiss the tips of her fingers. "This is Michael, my mate. He's part of the Blackwater council and one of Gabriel’s betas."
Immediately I dropped my eyes and shifted back a few steps to show deference. Years of constantly submitting had been drilled into my head. My shoulders hunched, and I tried to seem as non-threatening as possible. I felt my mother mimic my motions beside me.
"Oh, hey, no," Michael said quickly, stepping forward. He reached out and touched my mom's shoulder. "You don't have to do that. This isn't a test. You're friends of Zoe's, so you're friends of mine. Please."
We both looked at each other, unsure, and then at the man before us. He smiled kindly. "Zoe told me a bit about your old pack."
Mom's back went ramrod straight and she visibly swallowed hard before glancing at Zoe, trying to figure out exactly what he knew. What Zoe knew or what Zara had told him. "I ... I don't know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything," he answered. "Gabe will have questions. Zara told Zoe a little of what was going on a few days ago. She called right after you two got on the road."
Mom went still. "A few days ago?" Her gaze zeroed in on Zoe. "You haven't talked to her since?"
Zoe shook her head with a sigh. "No. To be honest, I'm a little worried. I called the house since she wasn't answering her cell phone, but Linden said she was busy." Her bitter tone left little unclear about how she felt about her brother-in-law.
"But you couldn’t speak to her?" Mom asked carefully.
Zo
e nodded once. "He said Zara was busy planning the memorial for Warren and she would be indisposed for a while before he hung up. Asshole."
Michael wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pressing his lips to her temple. "We'll figure out what's going on."
"Damn it," Mom hissed under her breath. "I knew we shouldn't have left her."
"We could go back," I offered quietly, my stomach twisting violently at the thought of crawling back to the compound. But I would for Zara. She had risked everything to help us.
"No!" Zoe and my mom shouted the word at the same time. They both looked horrified at the suggestion. Even Michael was frowning.
"Your uncle asked if I had seen you or your mother," Zoe told us seriously. "He knows you're missing. If he asked me that means he probably knows Zara and I helped you."
Mom drew in a deep breath. “This is exactly why I wanted her to come with us.”
Zoe gave her a sad smile. “You know my big sister. She never would have left Bella behind, and Bella thinks her father can do no wrong.”
"Gabriel and the council are working on a solution," Michael informed us. "Zoe still has a few friends in the Long Mesa pack we can reach out to also."
"It's not the pack you remember, Zoe," Mom told her, her jaw set in a hard line. "It's so much worse than Zara probably told you."
"Zara hasn't told me much," Zoe admitted. "Linden frequently monitored her calls."
"That doesn't surprise me. My little brother is nothing if not completely paranoid. He's been running Long Mesa the last few years even while Warren was still technically the Alpha. His father didn't bother controlling him. Truthfully, I don't think he could. I half expected Linden to challenge him any day." Mom shook her head, her ponytail swishing over a shoulder. She absently reached up and twisted the ends around her fingers.
"We should get going," Michael said. He pulled a set of keys from his pocket. "We'll leave your car here. I'll have some of the pack members bring it back to our house later on this evening. Gabriel and Mallory are expecting us for lunch. She’s cooked enough for an army."
I tried not to tense but failed miserably. Michael caught it and gave me another open smile. "Don't worry. Mallory is always looking for an excuse to throw a party, but Gabriel convinced her to keep it low key. It'll just be the six of us today."
Telling myself to relax and breath was a lot easier than actually putting the words into practice. Again, Michael caught my hesitance.
"Skye, you're safe. You and your mom are safe now. Trust us, please." His gray eyes studied me, imploring me to trust him.
Zoe smiled at her husband, looking at him as if he had just climbed into the sky and plucked out the moon just for her. She turned that smile on me and held out a hand. "Let's go home, honey."
Taking a deep breath, I stepped forward and took her hand.
6
Whatever I expected the Blackwater Alpha house to look like, this wasn't it.
The drive to the house took a little over fifteen minutes, up a winding road. The car climbed higher and higher, thick trees lining the way. The Alpha home sat atop the mountain surrounded by woods, and I could see a small town set below. It was like the residence and people who lived within the walls were standing sentry over the people below.
The building itself was a sprawling log cabin, three stories high with large windows and smoke curling out of the stone chimney above. It was beautifully rustic. The wraparound porch had several seating areas that looked comfortable and inviting. It was a stunning home that made the one my mom grew up in look tiny in comparison.
We barely made it to the stairs leading up before the double front doors were pulled open. A tall woman with dark hair curled into glossy brown waves beamed a smile down at us. She was dressed in jeans with a red flannel shirt and a pair of socks with dancing sloths, no shoes. Her brown eyes were sparkling in the fall sunlight as she watched us approach.
"Welcome to Blackwater," she greeted kindly, coming down the stairs to meet us, stepping onto the grass with her socks. She extended a hand to Mom, clasping it firmly. "I'm Mallory Holt."
"Mallory is our Alpha's mate," Zoe supplied, taking Mom's place to hug Mallory.
Mallory returned the hug but waved her comment off. "Please. All that means is that I have to make sure Gabe behaves himself."
"But you do it so well, babe."
Gabriel, I realized, forgetting to look at the ground and instead taking him in with wide eyes.
We all looked up to see a man leaning against the door frame, one muscular shoulder propped against the wood. He looked completely at ease in a black t-shirt and jeans and ... also no shoes. His light brown hair looked like he had been running his hands through it all day. The stark domesticity of it was jarring. I was used to an Alpha who insisted his mate be seen and not heard. Zara was mostly just pretty decoration for Linden and a big screw you to my mother.
This man screamed Alpha, but he also gave an air of safety and kindness. The way he watched his mate was beautiful. He looked at her like she hung the moon and the stars just for him.
Mom elbowed my side, and I quickly ducked my head the way she did in deference, waiting for the Alpha to acknowledge us.
Gabriel cleared his throat. “Thank you, but that isn’t necessary.”
Mom and I exchanged wary glances before lifting our heads.
Gabriel looked down at his mate. “One of your timers went off before I came out here.”
Mallory froze and gave him a suspicious look. “And you left it alone, right?”
He flashed her a sheepish grin. “You shouldn’t have made my favorite cookies if you didn’t want me to touch them.”
She shook her head and climbed back up the stairs. "You would think that with the children at school I would get a bit of a break from chasing people out my kitchen."
Gabriel pushed off the door frame and hooked his fingers in Mallory's belt loops, tugging her against him as he smiled down at her. "You love me."
Her eyes narrowed playfully. "Sometimes." She pushed away and walked back into the house, motioning for us to follow. "Come on in. You must be starving from your trip. We prepared lunch. We can talk while we eat."
Gabriel smiled as we all came up the stairs. He clasped Michael's hand firmly. "I hope you're all hungry."
Michael and my mom followed Gabriel into the house, but I paused, still in shock. Gabriel and Mallory were nothing like what I expected. In Long Mesa, the only time I saw Linden touch Zara was with force, like at the night we escaped. Most of the male shifters in the pack treated women as though they were beneath them. Only a few female shifters were part of upper pack members, and they were just as cruel as the males.
"They're bonded," Zoe said softly, pausing beside me.
I looked back at her. "What?"
"Gabriel and Mallory." She inclined her head towards the house. "They're true mates. I don't think there are any true mates left in Long Mesa now."
"What are true mates?" The term sounded completely foreign.
"They're soulmates, essentially. Their wolves are bonded. It's a deeper, even sacred connection that’s more than just being mated or married. True, bonded mates are a rare blessing. Once wolves bond, the connection between them ...."
Zoe sighed, rubbing the back of her neck with a wry grin. "It's hard to explain. There's an added layer of awareness. They can sense each other’s emotions, even across long distances. In wolf form, they can eventually learn to communicate with each other. It also slows the human side of the aging process and increases fertility. It's why they have four children instead of the usual one or two most shifters can conceive."
That sounded like something out of a novel. "So you’re saying that they're telepathic immortals who have lots of babies?"
Zoe considered that with a laugh. "I guess that's one way to put it."
"How did they know they were bonded?" I asked, curious about the whole thing.
"They grew up together and were always inseparable, as Mallory te
lls it. They played together as kids, went to school together, dated, got married ... There's no obvious predictor of what pairs will bond. It's a connection that just happens, and, once it does, it's undeniable. One day, when they were in wolf form, the bond snapped into place. Like the final piece of a puzzle."
"And it just happened? No warning?”
Zoe nodded, a soft smile ghosting across her lips. "A mate bond is a strange thing. Most pairs don't find it. We have couples in the pack that the bond snapped into place after they had been married for a decade. Usually the bond seems to happen in pairs in their late twenties or thirties. Occasionally when they’re older than that, though.”
"Wow," I whispered, wondering why I had never heard of such a thing.
Zoe gave me a soft look. "My parents were true mates. It's the only reason why we can figure they had two daughters."
"They died, though, right?" I asked hesitantly. Mom had told me a few stories of her life with Zara and Zoe before she was banished.
Her smile slipped a bit. "Yeah. They were killed in a car accident outside of the compound. I was eighteen, Zara was nineteen. It was a year before your mom..."
Got pregnant, I filled in silently.
"Anyway," she said, breathing deeply and shaking away the memories, "I had already met Michael the summer before, and we planned to get married. I begged Zara to come up here with me, but she didn't want to leave her pack. She didn't want to leave your mom. Then when your mom found out she was pregnant, Zara got sucked into everything between the packs and married to Linden before Michael and I could get her out."
"I'm sorry," I told her honestly.
"Thank you," she replied, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. "I did get to come back a few times and visit for the first few years. We used to try and sneak things to you and your mom, but the guards always seemed to find them. Eventually your grandfather and uncle decided we were no longer welcome in the pack.”
"But you like it here?"
She nodded enthusiastically. "I love it here. Blackwater is my home. A lot of that is because of Gabe and Mallory. They're amazing friends, and a terrific Alpha pair."
Sanctum (Blackwater Pack Book 1) Page 5