CHAPTER III.
POLL'S FUNNY TRICKS.
In summer, Poll lived mostly out of doors, hung in a cage at the top ofthe piazza. Here she seemed very much amused at the various operationsshe witnessed.
In the morning, she was placed in front of the house on account of theshade; but after dinner, the cage was carried round to a porch, wherethe shed and barn were in full view.
From the front porch, she could salute all the early visitors, and watchthe butcher's cart as it passed, often startling him with the inquiry,--
"What have you to-day?" Then, if no one answered, she would quicklyreply, "Veal," or, "Only veal to-day."
But her greatest amusement was to watch a family of children, who livednearly opposite. There was one child just commencing to go to school--aduty which he disliked exceedingly.
As soon as Poll saw him she would begin, "You must go, or you'll grow upa dunce."
Then she would whine, and cry, "I won't go, I say I won't."
"Go right along, you naughty boy, or I shall tell your father."
Poll now begins to sob and sniffle in earnest, when she suddenly stopsand begins the whole conversation over again, greatly to the merrimentof her hearers.
There is, however, one trick that Poll has learned, which is quiteinconvenient.
Near Mr. Lee's house, the ground rises, his residence being on a hill.Teams loaded with coal, and other heavy articles, continually pass by,it being of course quite an object with the drivers to get the horses tothe top of the hill without stopping on the way.
But this would spoil Miss Poll's fun. When they are about half way up,and just in the steepest part, she calls out, "Whoa," in a loud,authoritative voice, so exactly in imitation of the driver that theyobey at once. This she repeats as often as he attempts to start themforward, until, greatly vexed, I am sorry to say, he sometimes swearsat both the horses and the bird.
Nor is this all. When the teams have reached the top of the hill, andthe driver wishes to let them stop and breathe, Poll begins to cluck forthem to go on, and will not let them rest until they are out of hersight, when she begins a hearty laugh over her own joke. In the meantime, the driver frets and fumes, and wishes that bird had the drivingof those horses for once.
Poll has formed quite an acquaintance with most of the children of theneighborhood. At one time, there was a great excitement among the boysin regard to a company of soldiers they were forming. On Wednesday andSaturday afternoons, they marched up and down the street, past Mr.Lee's, beating a drum, and singing, "Rub-a-dub, dub! rub-a-dub, dub!Hurrah, hurrah!" As soon as they were out of hearing, Poll began thestory, and went through the drill with great glee.
From the back porch, Poll witnessed the grooming of the horses, when, aswas often the case, they were taken out for Mrs. Lee and Minnie to ride.Indeed, she did her best, as far as words could go, to assist in theoperation. While the harness was being put on, she continually calledout, "Back, sir! Stand still! What are you about there?" This was oftendone, greatly to the discomfiture of the hostler, who was obligedgenerally to countermand these orders.
I have told you that Poll was very fond of her friends, and jealous oftheir affection. She was also very strong in her dislikes. There was onemember of the family whom she could not endure, and she took everyoccasion to vent her spite against him. This was the colored boy whoblacked the boots, scoured the knives, and ran errands.
Early one morning, when Poll was hanging up at a back window, she sawTom polishing the boots, and whistling a merry tune, never once thinkingof his enemy near him. Squeezing herself, as she often did, through thewires of her cage, she crept silently along through an inner room intothe shed, when she flew directly at him, caught him by the legs, andheld him fast.
Poor Tom was frightened nearly out of his senses, and yelled for someone to take the parrot away. The servants enjoyed the fun too well,however, to release him. They laughed heartily, telling him to shake heroff; but he was paralyzed with fright, and stood the picture of horroruntil the cook coaxed Poll away.
At another time, she took a great dislike to the groom, who was anIrishman. Watching a favorable opportunity, she flew at him, caught holdof his shirt bosom, and held it so tightly with her strong beak, that itwas some time before Mrs. Lee, who was attracted to the kitchen by thenoise, could make her let go her hold of the astonished object of herhatred.
After this, whenever the women servants were displeased with the man,they would slyly let Poll out of her cage, when she darted directlytoward him, and was thus the means of his losing many a dinner.
When his grievances became too heavy, he complained to his mistress, whosoon put a stop to such unjust proceedings.
One evening, when Mr. Lee drove into the yard, he heard Minnie laughingheartily. Approaching nearer, he saw her sitting on the piazza; Leo,looking rather ashamed, crouching at her feet; and Poll talking, ingreat excitement, in exact imitation of his own tones--
"Leo, come here! good fellow! Down, sir! Leo, Leo! Hurrah, boys; whatfun!"
As it was near the time for his master's return, the dog had been morereadily deceived by the parrot's call, and had run rapidly toward thehouse, when he perceived that he had been made a fool of, as he oftenhad been before.
A few hours later, they were talking it over in the library, when Mr.Lee said he thought he had read an incident very similar.
Minnie joyfully clapped her hands, while her father took down the book,and read,--
"A parrot belonging to a gentleman in Boston was once sunning himself inhis cage, at the door of a shop. Seeing a dog in the distance, he beganto whistle, when the animal, imagining it to be the call of his master,ran swiftly toward the house.
"At this moment, the bird exclaimed, 'Get out, you brute!' when theastonished dog hastily retreated, leaving the parrot laughing andenjoying the joke."
"That reminds me," added Mrs. Lee, "of a story a lady once told me of aparrot she owned, and which was really a wonderfully intelligent bird. Anew family moved into the neighborhood, consisting, among others, of twoyoung ladies, who always dressed very gayly.
"Polly had a bad habit of making remarks upon the passers by, as shehung in her cage overlooking the main street. If, as was sometimes thecase, persons engaged in conversation stopped near the house, they wouldoften be startled by the cry,--
"'Go home, now! Want to quarrel?'
"But when she saw ladies dressed fashionably, she gave utterance to amost contemptuous laugh, which would have been insult enough by itself;but she often accompanied it by the words,--
"'La, how smart I do feel!'
"My friend called at once on her new neighbors, but unfortunately foundthey were out; she waited a long time for the call to be returned, andat last began to wonder that no notice was taken of her politeness, whenthe cause of the neglect was explained by a mutual friend.
"It appeared that on several occasions the young ladies had passed thehouse, and had heard the insulting laugh and words, which theyattributed to my friend; so that when asked whether they had becomeacquainted with Mrs. G., they answered, coolly, 'We have no wish to makeher acquaintance.'
"Being pressed for a reason, they at last confessed that they had beenrepeatedly insulted, and narrated in what manner it had happened.
"This answer caused such a burst of merriment that they were surprised,until, being told that it was the chattering of a tame parrot, they soonjoined in the laugh, and went at once to make her acquaintance, and alsothat of her mistress."
Minnie's Pet Parrot Page 4