Life of the Party

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Life of the Party Page 7

by Olivia Gatwood


  AILEEN WUORNOS TEACHES ME ABOUT COMMITMENT

  First rule. Men always want to come inside you so that if they give you a sickness or a baby, you are bound to them forever. People will tell you men don’t like commitment and the first rule is that you shouldn’t believe them. Remember, sickness or a baby. Neither of which they’ll take care of. Men will commit to hurting you but not to healing you. I love commitment and you can believe me on that. Second rule is that you should always believe me because I am always telling the truth. I love commitment because I hate asking questions. I want everything to be big and loud and forever and certain and true. I want to say my mother’s whole name. I want you to tell me I have her nose and mean it. I want to be forgiven quickly. I want to say I love you on the first date. I want to play your favorite song until you get sick of it and then never play it again. Tell me you’re hungry and I’ll fry you an egg. I want to remain young enough to believe I’ll never change. I hate epiphanies. I spent my whole life getting into cars with strangers and the worst part was when I recognized them from somewhere I couldn’t remember. No, the worst part was when I remembered but couldn’t tell if they did too. No, the worst part was when my mouth pulsed around them and they said, Do I know you from somewhere? Everyone says I speak in hyperbole but it’s just that there are so many ways for things to be the most of what they are. I hate being just a little bit cold in the supermarket. I just want to know where I’m wanted and where I’m not. And that’s what I told them, you know? I told them I wanted to make sure the people who hurt me don’t ever hurt anyone again. And since you can’t ever be sure of that, I took their whole damn bodies.

  III.

  Big mothership and all. I’ll be back, I’ll be back.

  —AILEEN WUORNOS

  SHE LIT UP EVERY ROOM SHE WALKED INTO

  but never asked to be the center of attention, just came in, always with a smile on her face, excited to see the people who loved her, which was everyone she ever met, and did i mention she was always happy, never ever ever was she in a bad mood, in fact i don’t think anyone ever saw her not smiling, did you? i heard, from a girl at church, that she actually had a smile surgically implanted into her face, i mean just the most bubbly, cheerful girl you’ve ever met, everyone had a crush on her but no one actually dated her, which made her that much more desirable. she was celibate, i heard, but somehow knew exactly how to make everyone want her, she was like that, such a bright future, so bright we could barely even look at it without permanently damaging our eyesight, she could’ve done anything she wanted, a nurse, a lawyer, a silent wife, talk about a girl with goals, and on top of all of that? she was a track star, volunteered at the soup kitchen on weekends, and had never disappointed her parents, honestly, come to think of it, there was no one in the world who deserved this less than she did, of all people, i can think of twelve people who deserved this more, it’s almost like a sacrifice, maybe the world just didn’t deserve her, maybe none of us did, someone so wholesome, so vibrant, so alive, so obedient, so demure, so petite, so tender, so strong, so pretty, so prude, so brave, so quiet, so butchered, so blue. i guess the silver lining is that now the bar isn’t so high for the rest of us, we all look better with her dead, just kidding, did you hear she was clutching the fence when they found her? she fought like hell, apparently, it’s a shame it was my birthday party and i forgot to invite her, it’s a shame no one heard her screaming, the music was just so loud and we were all singing along.

  [everything we called hormones. everything we called a temper tantrum. everything i envied. everything i wanted. everything about the babysitter’s other life, i wanted, the one i wished so badly to know, the one where she shows me where she hides.]

  WHEN THEY FIND HIM

  The men who loved him say,

  We never would have expected this,

  while his ex-wife goes into hiding.

  Before the Visalia Ransacker

  turned Original Night Stalker

  turned East Area Rapist

  turned Golden State Killer was caught—

  a former cop, living with his daughter

  and granddaughter in a vast and stuccoed

  suburban home in Citrus Heights, California—

  the detectives were overwhelmed with tips

  from women who were convinced

  it was their uncle, their boyfriend,

  their coworker who once,

  in a fit of rage, smashed his computer

  screen with an empty mug.

  Everyone keeps asking aloud,

  Who would have guessed?

  Him, of all people.

  But we look at each other

  across the room.

  We roll our eyes.

  We have the composite sketch

  in our pockets. We held it

  up to our fathers

  while they slept.

  what does it mean

  to have an instinct?

  does it just mean I was born

  to avoid a certain breed of death?

  WILL I EVER STOP WRITING ABOUT THE DEAD GIRL

  & all of the ways she, i, we, would be unborn

  & at the hands of who—men we once loved

  or who stumbled upon us, those who we ticked off

  or turned down & then, how they will remove

  what’s left, in small parts or on display

  or tucked into bed to be found by the landlord?

  even when i am not writing

  about the dead girl, i am writing

  about the dead girl. even when the girl

  in the poem is alive, she is dead

  & i am writing about a time when she wasn’t.

  i am sorry for killing the mood.

  it’s just that i can’t stop thinking about her

  & how she must have been afraid like i am,

  how she too must have imagined some blue

  version of herself. i’ve always had trouble

  getting over people & maybe the dead girl

  is the one i never will, the one that got away,

  whose favorite song is playing in the pharmacy

  while i wait for my medicine.

  maybe there is a dead girl inside of me,

  inside of all of us, waiting for her turn

  to tap dance at the beauty pageant,

  maybe right now she’s shy & nervous

  backstage, but once she hears her name,

  she’ll shuffle, ball, change

  & not blink twice.

  [i am sorry to do this to you. i know you’ve been hanging on so long. i did not get a final phone call. i saw her face on the internet and i knew it was a tribute. do you ever think about which picture they’d use? if you’re reading this, please choose the one of me in a t-shirt the color of burnt sienna, my hair in a single braid laid over my shoulder & across my chest. it is not my favorite photo but the one where my mother says i look most like myself. alec took it. ask him for it. the babysitter died in the hospital where my mother works. no, the babysitter died in the bathroom of my favorite restaurant. then was taken to the hospital where my mother works & died again. i hate telling people how it happened. there is a difference between fact & truth. the fact is that she overdosed. the truth is that he killed her.]

  ELEGY FOR ALLEGEDLY

  In its place, a gap   wide enough for a girl

  to press her finger.

  Now a sentence looks   like my teeth.

  The boy   touched me in my sleep.

  The owner of the cake shop   drove

  twenty women to quit their jobs.

  What I said   happened is what happened

  and not what I remember.

  ODE TO THE WOMEN ON LONG ISLAND


  after Jennifer Givhan

  I want to write a poem for the women on Long Island

  who smoke cigarettes in their SUVs with the windows

  rolled up before walking into yoga, who hack and curse

  in downward dog, and Debra from the next block over, who

  has strong opinions about Christmas lights after New Year’s,

  who says that her body isn’t what it used to be

  but neither is the economy or the bagels at Rickman’s Deli

  so who really cares, who, during shavasana, brings up

  the rabbi’s daughter, who got an abortion last spring,

  and Candy in the corner, who is mousy and kind

  but makes a show of removing her diamond ring before

  class because it’s just too heavy, calls Debra hateful

  and the class takes a sharp inhale through the nose

  then out through the mouth. And after class, after Candy

  rushes home to check the lasagna, Debra lights up

  a smoke and calls her best friend Tammy.

  So then the girl calls me hateful,

  hateful, can you believe it? What a word.

  Some kind of dictionary bitch over here

  and so you know what I says? I says

  you don’t know the first thing about hateful,

  wanna know what’s hateful? Menopause.

  And it doesn’t really matter if Debra actually said that

  to Candy (which she didn’t) because Tammy is so

  caught up that Candy called Debra hateful (which she did)

  that next week when Tammy runs into Candy while

  shopping in Rockville Centre and Candy asks Tammy

  how she’s doing, Tammy will adjust the purse strap

  on her shoulder and say, We all have a little coal

  in our stocking, Candy, and Candy will shuffle away,

  certain that Tammy knows something about her marriage

  that she shouldn’t, and she doesn’t, she just loves

  Debra, who just has a lot of opinions and had Candy given

  her the chance to finish her sentence, Debra would have

  talked about the reproductive rights march she went to

  in the ’60s and the counterproductive sex-shaming

  methods of organized religion. I want to write a poem

  for the women on Long Island, whose words stretch

  and curl like bubblegum around the forefinger, who

  ask if I have a boyfriend and before I answer, say,

  Don’t do it. Don’t ever do it. You know

  my friend Linda, she’s a lesbian,

  like a real lesbian, and whenever I go

  over there, she lives on Corona over by

  Merrick, by the laundromat, you know where

  I’m talking about? Whenever I go over there

  and see her and her wife, what’s her name?

  I can never remember the girl’s name,

  anyway whenever I go there I says you know

  what I need? I says, a girlfriend, that’s what I need.

  The women on Long Island smoke weed once a month

  on the side of the house after their husbands—Richard Larry

  Gary Mike or Tony—go to bed, they let their teenage

  daughters throw parties in the basement while they watch

  the home network upstairs and keep a bat by the couch

  in case anyone gets Mickeyed, even if it’s their own sons

  who did the drugging, the women on Long Island won’t

  put it past any man to be guilty, even their kin, who,

  after all, have their husband’s hands and blood and

  last week, when a girl was murdered while jogging

  in Queens, the women on Long Island were unstartled

  and furious, they did not call to warn daughters.

  They called their sons. Took their car keys, their coats,

  locked the door, and sat them at the kitchen table.

  If you ever, and I mean ever, so much as

  make a woman feel uncomfortable

  I will take you to the deli and put your

  hand in the meat slicer, you think I won’t?

  You hear me? I will make a hero out of you.

  With mayonnaise and tomatoes and dill and onions.

  I want to write a poem for the women on Long Island

  who, when I show them the knife I carry in my purse,

  tell me it’s not big enough, who are waitresses

  and realtors and massage therapists and social workers

  and housewives and nannies and tell me they wish

  they would have been artists but

  life comes fast. One minute you’re taking typing classes

  for your new secretary job in the World Trade Center

  and the next it’s all almost over, life I mean, but I kicked

  and screamed my way through it, and so will you,

  I can tell by the way you walk. One more thing:

  When they call you a bitch, say thank you. Say thank you, very much.

  MY GIRL

  Dee & I are rolling silverware in the ’50s-themed diner where we work & “My Girl” is playing on the jukebox for the forty-second time today. We are still singing along, even though we don’t want to, it’s just so easy to say it, My Girl, & Dee stops to tell me she’s been on television once, Dateline, she says & if there is one thing I know about Dateline it’s that you’re either on it as a dead girl or as someone who knew her, but Dee is neither. Dee is just a woman who stopped her car one day when she saw a girl, naked, running down Central with shoelaces tied around her neck & asked if she needed help. They’ve gotta learn that this stuff happens, somehow, she says of her daughters, who were piled into the back seat when it happened, as if defending herself from some judgment she thought I might make about her motherhood, but if there’s one thing I know for sure it’s that Dee knows how to raise a kid. She’d been kidnapped, just picked up right outside of her studio apartment & escaped after three days of being tortured, Dee says without a shift in tone, she never shifts in tone, even when she is explaining to the group of Harley riders at table 10 that she can’t serve them any more beers, even when she tells off some lady’s kid for wasting the ketchup, even when she hits the high note on My Girl, somehow, the gavel of Dee’s mouth always thuds the same way. One might even think she is telling me a story about her daughter’s new boyfriend, how he refuses to wash his dishes, a nuisance, this man who took the girl & tied her to a bedpost in his Albuquerque apartment. When they caught him, he led them to a body up north where the family of the first girl he murdered found her bracelet in the mud. Dee says, You can watch the episode, somewhere. Three years later, after I’ve quit the diner, I move to New York with a man who loves me & I am drinking a beer in a bar with flat-screen TVs above the liquor shelf that are usually reserved for football but today, they’ve turned the channel to Dateline & there is Dee’s face, explaining that she watched the girl for a while as she ran into businesses and was kicked out every time. No one helped her, Dee says to the camera. But my tire iron is under the front seat of my car. I’m not going to let anybody hurt us.

  AILEEN WUORNOS CONVINCES ME TO PUT DOWN MY DOG

  If it was socially acceptable to bite people, every person in this city would have a chunk ripped out of their thigh in the shape of my mouth. I undid a few men and now the state is gonna undo me. When I was a kid, we would scoop out snails from their shells with a spoon and let them sizzle on the sidewalk. How many men do you know who did that to a woman and still get to walk free at the grocery store, try all the samples, go golfing on the we
ekends in their peach pressed pants? In an article about me, I read that you always know the killer was a woman if the body is left covered with a blanket. Just say it, you always know the killer was a woman if she cleaned up after. Just say it, you always know the killer was a woman if she tried to protect the kid who would discover the body. Even the television shows have titles that show we only do it when we lose it: Snapped, Enough, Women Who Kill. But listen, and I’m only telling you this because you asked me, it’s better to let her go than shut her inside your house until she’s so old you have to carry her up the stairs. She deserves to be somewhere where no one is afraid of her and maybe that place is death. I just think it’s funny how, before they kill you, they give you anything you want to eat. Like, don’t do me any favors. I’m gonna ask for black coffee because these motherfuckers don’t deserve to watch me enjoy something. But you? You boil that dog a whole chicken. You let her rip it to shreds.

  ODE TO MY BITCH FACE

  you pink armor, lipstick rebel,

  steel-cheeked, slit-mouth,

  head-to-the-ground, mean girl.

  you headphones in but no music

  you house key turned blade

  you quickstep between streetlights

  strainer of pricks and chest-beaters,

  laughter is a foreign language

 

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