by Londyn Skye
“Thank you, masta’ Lee!” Lily suddenly threw her arms around her father’s neck to hug him.
Levi smiled and hugged her back. “Go on and see what you can find, okay?”
“Okay!” Lily took off running, grabbed her new basket, and went in search of little orange and red treasures.
Maya and Levi both watched their daughter scamper away with smiles on their faces. But the smile suddenly faded from Maya’s face when she turned to look at Levi again. “Levi, what’re you doin’ ova’ here with her?” she asked, giving him a disapproving look over his interaction with Lily.
Levi did not see the look on her face, though. His eyes were still on Lily as something else distracted his mind. “Masta’ Lee,” he said somberly. “Feels like shards ‘a glass in my ears every time I hear Lily refer to me that way. It literally turns my stomach that my own little girl has absolutely no idea who I really am.”
“You know that’s the way I want it to stay, Levi.”
“And I pray every day you’ll change your mind,” he replied, finally turning to look at Maya.
“I truly believe it’s best this way.”
“And I truly believe this will always be somethin’ that we agree to disagree about. I just don’t see how it could eva’ be best for a little girl not to know her fatha’.”
“Unda’ normal circumstances, I’d completely agree with you. But you can’t keep pretendin’ like this is anything close to normal. As much as it may hurt, I’m hopin’ one day you’ll admit to yourself that this is indeed what’s best.”
“I highly doubt I’d eva’ be able to get my mind or my mouth to form such a statement.”
Maya sighed and shook her head after hitting a brick wall over the issue yet again.
Levi slid his hands into his pockets. “Despite how differently I feel, I know this is the way you want it, and I promise I’d neva’ dishonor your wishes, but…” He shook his head and sighed. “It’s killin’ me inside, Maya.” He turned and watched Lily still searching for fruit. “There’s hardly eva’ a minute in my day when that little girl isn’t weighin’ heavy on my mind and my heart. I miss readin’ Lily stories. I’d love to let ’er climb on my back for a pretend horse ride. I wish she’d ask me to a pretend tea party, ask me to dance with ’er, or whateva’ otha’ fun things little girls love to do with their fatha’s. I wanna tuck ’er in bed and kiss ’er goodnight. I wanna pick ’er up and hug ’er wheneva’ I feel like it.” He exhaled to steady his emotions. “And God knows I’d give anything to hear her call me daddy,” he said, his voice slightly cracking. “I wanna tell ’er how much her daddy loves her…” Levi turned back toward Maya. “And how much I love ’er motha’.” He touched Maya’s face. “I want ’er to know that even through this entire situation, my love for you has been unwaverin’. I want my little girl to know that she was made outta love. But here it stands, the woman I love beyond measure has given me the little girl I thought I’d neva’ be fortunate enough to have…” He took his hand off Maya’s face and turned to look at Lily again. “And I can’t even show ’er how precious she is to me … and it’s killin’ me inside,” Levi whispered. He then turned back to look at Maya. “And so is the fact that I’m missin’ you.” He softly caressed her face. “I miss you more than you can possibly imagine.”
Maya could not logically comprehend how it was possible for her to feel the way she felt about a man who had sold other people’s children. But there she was, returning his gaze, feeling a wonderful surge of butterflies fluttering through her stomach after hearing his words and feeling his gentle touch. She suddenly broke her fixation on Levi when she heard Lily calling to her.
“Mama! I found an orange for you!” Lily exclaimed, running back toward her. She took the fruit from her basket and handed it to Maya.
“Thank you, baby,” Maya said, smiling down at her. She was glad to have a way to hide the tears Levi had caused to flood her eyes.
“You’re welcome!” Lily then turned to Levi. “I found one for you too, Masta’ Lee!” she said in a voice that exuded pure innocence. She reached in her basket and handed an orange to her father with the brightest smile on her face, as if she was handing him a rare treasure.
And to Levi, that’s exactly what it felt like Lily was handing him: a precious gift from his precious little girl. He looked at Lily and could feel a lump growing quickly in his throat. Such a small gesture nearly brought him to tears. He kneeled, touched Lily’s cheek, and looked into a tiny set of eyes that mirrored his. He wondered how on earth the laws could ever punish him for creating a child so beautiful … in every sense of the meaning. He wished that the man who had the audacity to create such an offensive law could kneel the way he was and come face to face with the sort of child whose existence he was trying to prevent. “Thank you, little flowa’,” Levi finally said, unable to take his eyes off his daughter.
“You’re welcome,” Lily smiled, not knowing how her simple gesture had triggered her father’s emotions, nor how her father’s nickname for her would trigger this very memory twenty-two years later. “Ma-ma, can you help me find some more apples?”
“Sure baby,” Maya replied, walking off hand in hand with Lily as Levi watched on, feeling unbridled envy.
****
Just after ten p.m, Levi finally tossed his comforter aside. After lying in bed unable to sleep, he sat up, put his feet on the floor, and exhaled. From the nightstand, he picked up the orange that Lily had given him. He sat on the edge of his bed mindlessly twisting it, while thinking about the little girl he had created with a woman who inspired him to write his thoughts daily. Still holding his cherished orange, Levi got up and walked across the hallway. He leaned against the doorframe of the bedroom directly across from his. In the secret world of his mind, this room was Lily’s, decorated in whatever artful colors her heart desired. Many a bedtime story he had read to her there with a goodnight kiss that followed. Knowing such a thing would always be just a fantasy, though, Levi sighed and walked back to his bedroom. He leaned against the doorframe while staring at his empty bed. He closed his eyes and pictured Maya lying in his embrace as he dozed off after making love to her. That vivid imagery had comforted him for years as he laid feeling lonely and unloved next to his wife.
The loving thoughts of his fantasies with Maya and Lily drew Levi to his bedroom window. Like it was a priceless artifact, he carefully sat his orange on the window ledge and gazed out at the place that housed the two beautiful subjects of his daydreams. Minutes later, he suddenly exited his bedroom. With a relentless nagging voice in his head tugging him, he was drudging across the fields in nothing but his work boots and pajama pants. He stopped in the barn, retrieved something from his hidden compartment in the horse stall, and took it to his bedroom. He then quietly tiptoed into Maya’s cottage and into her room. Maya had her arms wrapped tightly around Lily with her face nestled into her curls. Both were deep asleep. Levi just stopped and stared at the beautiful display of motherly love. It was yet another moment that amplified the love he felt for Maya. But it also amplified his envy. He often wished that Lily could curl up on his chest and nap with him on the couch, just as he had done countless times with his boys when they were her size. Unable to resist the urge to hold Lily that close, Levi reached down and took her from her mother’s arms.
Maya immediately roused. “Where you goin’ with her?!” she said, panic in her voice as she sat straight up.
“Shh, it’s okay.” Levi caressed Maya’s face. “Everything’s okay,” he reassured her.
Lily did not move a muscle or open her little eyes at all as Levi gently laid her head on his shoulder. He held her dead weight with ease as he ran his hand gently up and down her back. He embraced her tighter, closed his eyes, rested his head in her hair, and swayed gently with her as Maya watched on. When she saw the way that Levi held her, she immediately relaxed and finally accepted that her fears were not warranted. Levi opened his eyes after a moment and reached his hand out to Maya. She
hesitated at first and then placed her hand in his. He got a firm grip on her and helped her to stand. “Come with me,” he said.
“Wh-where we goin’?” she asked, confused.
Levi gazed lovingly at her. “Where you belong,” he whispered, his eyes communicating his sincerity.
Maya was not sure what he meant by that, but the tender tone in his voice made her decision to join him an easy one. Levi held Maya’s hand the entire way across the field while holding Lily in his other arm. He guided both of them into the house and quietly closed the door before taking Lily upstairs to the bedroom he had just imagined her sleeping in. He gently laid her down on the mattress. For the first time in his life, he then tucked Lily into bed. He placed the comforters just right and then sat down next to her. Lily still had yet to budge. “Does she always sleep this hard?” Levi asked Maya, as he ran his hand over Lily’s hair, feeling a ping of sorrow over the fact that he did not know something so simple about her.
“Always. She refuses to nap in the afta’noon. She fights it hard, but pays the price at night,” Maya answered. She smiled and sat down on the opposite side of the bed and played in Lily’s hair along with Levi. “You could run a train through here, horns blarin’, and she wouldn’t move a muscle,” Maya laughed. “She plays hard and sleeps even harda’.”
Levi laughed quietly. “I miss the days when I could sleep like that.”
“Me too.”
Levi leaned down and lightly kissed Lily on the cheek before rising and going around to the other side of the bed. He took Maya by the hands and guided her out of their daughter’s temporary bedroom. He then guided her across the hall to his master suite and locked the door behind him. He took a moment to light several candles in the room. He then turned around and stood there quietly gazing at Maya for a moment, happy that he had given into the nagging voice in his head that had led him to now be alone with this woman. He reached both of his hands out to Maya, inviting her to place hers there. When she obliged, he gently pulled her toward the center of the room.
“What’re you doin’?” Maya asked, starting to feel her heartbeat accelerate.
“Somethin’ I know I shouldn’t … but I can’t seem to help myself when it comes to you.” Levi walked over to the dresser and retrieved what he had taken out of the secret compartment in the barn earlier. “I made this for you,” Levi explained as he handed Maya a plain wooden box.
Maya opened it and pulled out what looked like a large white jewelry box. She looked confused. “What is it?”
“Open the lid,” Levi said, as he took the empty wooden box from her and set it aside.
Maya slowly opened the lid and the sound of a piano melody began to play, while the tiny sculptures of a Caucasian man and a Negro woman spun around in a circle, dancing to the music.
“It’s a music box,” Levi explained, gazing at the look of awe on Maya’s face. “That’s s’pposed to be you and me dancin’ in there. I’m no artist, so I know it’s not the most perfect lookin’ thing eva’,” he said, laughing lightly at his own attempt at artwork. “But since I don’t have a piano here, I figured this was the best way for you to hear the song it’s playin’. It’s one I play in church often and I really wanted you to hear it.” He touched Maya gently on the face. “Because you inspired it.”
Maya looked up with tears welling in her eyes. “Levi,” she whispered. “This is beautiful.”
“Wheneva’ I play this song, in my mind, I can see little Lily walkin’ down the aisle of a church, droppin’ flowa’ petals on the floor. She has a big smile on ’er face, lookin’ so pretty in her little dress with ’er hair all fixed up. And then I see you…” He caressed Maya’s face again. “You’re in your weddin’ gown, makin’ your way down the aisle toward me as I stand at the altar, waitin’ eagerly for you.” Levi briefly closed his eyes. “In my mind, you’re far and away the most stunning bride on earth.” He paused a moment and listened to the melody. “This part ‘a the song always trigga’s an image of me pledgin’ my vows to you. When the ceremony is ova’, I always imagine us at our reception…” He looked down at his handmade gift. “I’m holdin’ you close to me, dancin’ just the way we are in this music box.”
“I’ll always cherish this,” Maya whispered, tears now cascading down her cheeks.
Levi took the music box from Maya’s hand and set it on the dresser. He closed then opened the lid and restarted the music. He drew the curtains back and opened the window all the way. He then took Maya by the hand, guided her to where the full moon was casting its light into the room, and pulled her close to him. Maya rested her head on his shoulder and wrapped her arms around him. Her tears ran in streams down Levi’s bare skin as they danced under the moonlight, just as gracefully as the figurines he had carved.
“I missed holdin’ you this close to me,” Levi whispered when the song was over. “More than I can possibly explain.” He placed his hands on either side of Maya’s face and let the sensuousness of his slow kiss express that for him.
The feel of Levi’s lips and the warmth of his skin melted Maya just as quickly as the first time he had touched her in that way. “I missed havin’ you this close too,” Maya whispered back, resting her forehead against his. “But I want you even closa’,” she added, her supple lips grazing his as she spoke.
“How much closa’?” Levi lustfully replied, his lips grazing hers in return.
Maya caught his lips in a kiss again, as she slowly unbuttoned her dress and let it fall to the floor. She then confidently stepped back into the moonlight, letting it illuminate her nude body to perfection. All the while, she watched Levi’s unblinking eyes as they roamed the landscape of her body in awe. His parted lips and jagged breaths made her nipples harden and set her nether region ablaze. She kept her eyes trained on his captivated face as she untied his pajama pants and unleashed the rock-solid mass that was clearly begging to escape. When Levi stepped out of his pants, Maya took him by the hand and pulled him toward the windowpane. She turned to face the stars in the sky and made him put his arms around her waist. She then placed her hands on the ledge, leaned over, maneuvered her hips backward, and slowly filled herself with his erection. “This close,” she moaned.
Feeling pure elation after sliding into the silky wetness of Maya’s abyss, Levi let out a long satisfying groan. For nearly four years, he had fought this sinful sexual temptation that was as strong as the devil’s will; but no more. He now wanted to erupt inside of Maya, even if he was sentenced to hell for it.
Levi did not want to move at first while standing in the window reunited with Maya, bathing with her in the soft glow of the moonlight. He needed time for his mind to photograph such a picturesque moment with the woman he loved. He bathed her neck in gentle kisses as his hands slid up her waist and onto her breasts. Gently, he began tugging her hardened nipples as his tongue and teeth playfully teased her earlobe. Not knowing if he would ever be blessed with another moment like this, his hips remained still. He simply wanted to enjoy the feeling of melting inside the heat of Maya’s paradise. The pleasurable feeling radiating from Maya’s nipples eventually turned on her hips, though. But her tamed slow movements proved that she, too, wanted the feeling to last. Levi began moaning in response to Maya’s soft sighs as her slick internal folds began to massage his erection. Softly, he bit her neck as the pleasure escalated within him. Perfectly matching Maya’s rhythm, he began meeting her thrusts with slow gentle strokes. Despite their patient pace, Levi’s pleasure began to elevate quickly. He leaned his head back and let out a groan to help alleviate the mounting pressure. He then grabbed Maya’s waist and drove himself deeper, picking up speed. Maya immediately fell in sync, the plump cheeks of her posterior now slapping hard against Levi’s pelvis. The sudden spike in intensity built into a sensual melody of moans that drifted out the window like an erotic duet.
Just seconds away from exploding, Levi suddenly withdrew from Maya and turned her around to face him. He descended on her mouth with fervor,
completely covering her lips with his, dancing his tongue around hers. Maya gently bit each of his lips when he slowly tried to break their kiss. The twinge of pain sent a pulse of pleasure to his groin and stirred a carnal growl. As if her bite had turned him into a beast, Levi suddenly began savagely suckling on Maya’s neck. He then kissed his way down to her breast and softly bit her nipple in return. Moisture pooled between Maya’s thighs as she unleashed a carnal growl of her own. She grappled the back of Levi’s head, silently begging for more pleasurable punishment. Levi happily followed her orders and devoured her other nipple while driving two fingers inside of her abyss. Maya’s head fell backward as the shock of immense pleasure sent a primordial roar ripping through her vocal cords. With her head hanging slightly out of the window, she rode Levi’s fingers as he feasted like an untamed caveman on her breast.
Levi and Maya’s starvation for one another was evident in their hasty, manner-less movements. After nearly four years of deprivation, they were suddenly torn between wanting to extend the experience and rushing to satiate each other. Levi’s ravenous hunger caused him to tear away from Maya’s breast. He was starving for another part of her. He slid his tongue down her abdomen and onto her swollen nub, quickly sucking it into his mouth. Maya’s cries elevated, pleasantly piercing Levi’s ears. He growled again when she gripped the back of his head and began thrusting her southern lips against his tongue, forcing him to have his fill. With intense sensations now shooting through her body, Maya’s purrs were non-stop and so, too, was the heated pleasure rising in her core. Sitting on the windowpane illuminated by her beloved starlight, she suddenly tilted her head back and howled at the full moon as she came with intensity. Levi grunted over his appetizer, happily syphoning her sweet honey as it rushed down into his mouth and delighted his tongue.