by Londyn Skye
With tears now on her own cheeks, Lily descended on James’s parted lips. She passionately kissed him, sat up, and then began rocking her hips to the rhythm of his moans. As beautiful as the sight was, James no longer had the strength to keep his eyelids open; intense pleasure had snapped them closed. Lily would not have known, though, her body had caused her eyelids to do the same. Pleasure had even weakened the muscles of her neck. Her head fell backward, and her mouth fell open. All the strength in her body had transferred to her hips as she slowly rode James, guiding his mind and body back to sanity. Her thrusts were long and deep. She buried him for prolonged moments, grinding gently and intentionally slow, letting him dangle near the pinnacle of satisfaction. She kept his damaged mind lingering in the realm of bliss, while letting the pleasure of her body slowly obliterate the pain in his.
After minutes of slowly trotting him toward the clouds, Lily raised up on her knees and began forcefully burying James’s erection into her pleasure passageway. The erotic sound of skin clapping rose louder as she began riding him hard and fast into the climactic heavens. The drawn-out way that James suddenly called out for God signaled that Lily had just galloped him to the finish line of their heavenly destination. An explosion of his seed set fire to her insides, causing her to reciprocate with a rain shower of hot orgasmic juices that heated the skin of his stomach, as she called out the name of the stallion beneath her.
Completely depleted of strength, Lily immediately collapsed onto her man’s chest. It heaved just as hard as hers as they both fought to catch their breaths. “My god,” James said, breathlessly. “Do I get that kinda lovin’ afta’ every letta’ I read?” he panted.
“If that’s what my man needs, then that’s what my man shall have…” Lily kissed his neck. “Wheneva’, whereva’, and howeva’ he wants it,” she seductively reminded him as she nibbled lightly on his ear.
A low rumbling moan escaped James as he smoothed his hands down the sides of her body. “You’ll have my mind right in no time, Miss Lily.”
“That’s certainly the ultimate goal,” she smiled.
Lily then carefully dismounted him, laid down, and got comfortable on his chest. She lay there quietly for a moment, listening to the beautiful melody of his heartbeat as he caressed her soft skin. She suddenly sensed a shift in his demeanor when his fingertips grazed one of the faded lines of her whip striations. “Stop dwellin’ on it,” she suddenly said.
“On what?”
“On all the things you could’ve done differently to prevent those scars, and to prevent us from bein’ separated the day I got ’em.”
“Damn.” James kissed her forehead. “Scary how well you read me.”
“Your heart beats differently when somethin’s weighin’ heavily on you.”
“I won’t lie. It’s gonna be hard not to dwell on it sometimes. Especially when I think about how many years I’ve missed moments like this with you.” He paused, his mind momentarily drifting away. “And moments with our little Rose,” he whispered.
“I can’t believe you were right.”
“About what?”
“Rose … we had us a little girl afta’ all. You won,” Lily smiled.
“Say that one more time. A little louda’ this time, though. I couldn’t quite hear you,” James joked, putting his hand up to his ear.
Lily laughed and playfully hit him with a pillow.
“No fair hittin’ cripples,” James laughed.
Lily settled onto his chest again and went quiet. James was now the one sensing a shift in her demeanor. “What’s suddenly weighin’ on this beautiful mind?” he asked, softly kissing her temple.
“W-were you there when Rose was born?”
“Yes. I was there to catch ’er.”
Lily tried to swallow a sudden lump in her throat. “W-was she stillborn?”
James paused for a moment while he recalled the short time he had spent with his first born. “No,” he replied, swallowing back the swell of emotions the memory had conjured up. “She spent her whole life in my arms.”
“That’s the only thing I’ve been wantin’ to know about that day. I just wanted to be sure she was in the lovin’ arms of her daddy when God took ’er soul home,” she said as her tears spilled onto the very chest that Rose had laid next to.
“She was. I held ’er as close as my arms would let me. It was the most cherished thirty-six minutes ‘a my life.”
The tears that Lily suddenly felt roll onto her skin, proved how sincere James’s words were. “I’s so eager to see the look of pure joy on your face the day our baby came into the world. Seems impossible that I have absolutely no recollection of even givin’ birth at all. I genuinely don’t recall a single thing. Kissin’ you goodbye on the porch, and you tellin’ me that you loved me is the last clear memory I have of that day. My mind usually retains everything so vividly, but I’m glad everything else from that day was wiped clean outta my brain. I don’t even wanna know any otha’ details. My scars and losin’ our baby are enough to make me realize that I should be grateful to have no recollection of what was clearly the worst day ‘a my life.”
Thank God, James thought to himself. He kissed Lily’s forehead, relieved that she had no recollection of what his father and brother had done to her. He planned to gladly take those horrors to his grave.
“The only otha’ thing I wish I knew was where Rose’s body is now. I wish we could give ’er a propa’ burial.”
“I know exactly where she is.”
Lily quickly looked up at James “You do?” she asked, sounding stunned.
“Ava, the good doctor in the little Negro hospital you were in, was kind enough to bury her for us. She even made ’er a custom tombstone with a rose on it.”
“You were there?!” Lily exclaimed, surprise still evident in her tone.
James nodded. “It’s a long story that I’ll fill you in on lata’. But I followed the few clues and tips I had about the unda’ground railroad. I also recalled that Gideon used to share supplies with a few Negro doctors in Ohio. It all led me to Ava’s little hospital, but you were long gone by then. Ava told me about the Ghost Rida’s raidin’ that place months before. She said you were one of the ones they stole. Every lead I followed from there was a dead end.”
“I’m surprised anybody from the unda’ground railroad would trust you enough to tell you anything.”
“They didn’t at first. It was my name and my description of you that convinced Ava I was an ally and not an enemy.”
“Why your name?”
“Ava told me that you asked to see Rose’s body. She said afta’wards, you kept repeatin’ that James would neva’ forgive you for losin’ ’er.”
Sickened by the memory of her own words, Lily felt her stomach turn. “I-I didn’t mean it. I just wasn’t in my right mind.”
“I know, that’s what Ava figured to. But I wanna say this to you loud and clear, right here and right now.” He gently put his hand under Lily’s chin and made her look at him. “I neva’ eva’ thought to blame you for Rose’s death. Nor is that somethin’ I’d eva’ expect you to ask forgiveness for … not eva’, okay?”
Lily’s eyes fluttered closed when the kiss he let linger on her forehead sent warmth through her entire body. “Thank you for sayin’ that,” she sniffled. “I know betta’ now. Like I said, I just wasn’t in my right mind back then.”
“I don’t think any of us were then. I’m glad Ava realized that too.”
“My memories of bein’ in that hospital with Ava are spotty at best. But I’ll neva’ forget Rose’s tiny face,” Lily smiled. “We sho’ did make us a beautiful baby, didn’t we?”
“Far and away the most perfect I’ve eva’ laid eyes on. I eventually wanna bring our beautiful baby home and bury ’er here where she belongs.”
“Me too. And I’d certainly wanna thank Ava personally.”
“I told ’er you probably would.”
“That’s certainly the least we owe her fo
r givin’ our daughta’ a propa’ restin’ place. Far too many folks aren’t even given that.”
“That’s very true. That’s why I’m eternally grateful for her kindness. Which reminds me. Ava was kind enough to keep somethin’ else buried for us all these years.” James slowly got out of bed and limped over to his trunk full of sentimental treasures. He retrieved a satchel and sat back down on the bed with it. “I have a message to give you.”
“A message?”
James nodded. “A very important one.”
“From whom?”
“Well, I’d ratha’ not tell you just yet. Because before you can truly unda’stand the magnitude of the message, I think you need to read these first … every word,” he said, reaching into the satchel and handing Lily the first of her father’s journals.
“What is this?”
“Believe it or not, this is one of your fatha’s journals.”
Lily quickly handed it back like a snake had just bitten her. “Why in the world would I wanna read that?!” she snapped. “Where did you even get that?” she asked, looking at it with disgust.
“Your brotha’, believe it or not.”
“Wyatt?”
James nodded. “Him and Colt. And they broke me outta prison just to do it.”
Lily looked completely dumbfounded. “What? Why? Austin told me you went to prison, but he neva’ said how you got out.”
“I neva’ told Austin. Only Harrison knows. I needed to protect Wyatt and Colt for makin’ such a sacrifice. It’s a long and sordid tale, one I promise to tell you every detail of. But they broke me out for one reason and one reason only … to expend every breath in my body to find you and give you the message in a letta’ they wrote. But if you read your fatha’s journals first, I think you’ll have so much more clarity about your brotha’s motives, and all the otha’ gifts in this trunk that they made me promise to pass along to you.”
“Certainly speaks volumes about how important this must be to ’em.”
“Trust me, it is. I know all this sounds insane, but afta’ you read these, I’m certain you’ll unda’stand why it’s so important to ’em.”
Lily still just stared at the journal in James’s hand, a look on her face like the book would open the portal to hell.
“Lily, I don’t mean to upset you with any ‘a this. That’s the last thing I’d eva’ want.” James lowered his head, stared at the journal in his hand, and exhaled. “This world seems so ova’crowded with cruel people. I s’ppose that’s why it’s been so rare that a person eva’ inspires me. My motha’, William … and you,” he said caressing Lily’s cheek. “Outta the hundreds ‘a people I’ve known, you’re the only three who have truly inspired me in my life. But now, afta’ readin’ these journals … I have to add your fatha’ to the list.”
Lily’s eyes shot up to James’s face. She was stunned to find sincerity in his facial expression. The thought that her father had the ability to inspire any human seemed an impossibility in her spinning mind.
“I know that sounds preposterous. But you trust me, don’t you?” James asked.
His words brought Lily’s spinning mind to a halt. “Of course. But you want me to trust that the man who sold me away from my motha’ is worth readin’ about?”
“I know. So let me make it clear that I still don’t condone what he did, nor do I mean to disrespect you with any ‘a this. But please trust that I’d neva’ give these journals to you if I felt they’d hurt you in some way. I give these to you because I don’t think you truly knew your fatha’, Lily.” James looked her in the eyes. “Because you were neva’ allowed to meet ’em. In fact, I don’t think anybody knew the real Levi Collins at all. He seems to have only revealed his true self to the pages of these journals … and to your motha’.”
“My motha’?”
James nodded.
Lily’s wall immediately came crashing down. “Well, afta’ that intriguin’ statement, I certainly can’t resist givin’ it a chance.”
“That’s all I ask. Some ‘a this may not be easy to read, but I get this unrelentin’ feelin’ that it’ll help a small bit of you to heal, maybe even bring you some inner peace. At the very least, you deserve closure … and to get to know who your fatha’ really was.”
Lily stared at the first journal, feeling just as hesitant to touch it as she would a rabid dog. But she blew out a breath and slowly took it from James. When she finally garnered the courage to open to the first page, James suddenly stopped her. “Hold on,” he said, “How about you read these out at your favorite spot on William’s lake? I wanna hold you in my arms and listen to you read, just the way we used to.”
Lily’s face illuminated with a smile. “It’s a date!”
“See you there,” James smiled in return. He gently kissed her on the lips, then hobbled off to clean up and get ready in another room.
While Lily dolled herself up for their date, James had slowly made his way out to her favorite lakeside Oaktree, where he had taught her to read. He laid out a blanket, wine, and food beneath the shade. When James stepped back and glanced at the scene, fond memories of him and Lily laughing, and making love there, began to flash in his mind. He was warmed by the memories of moments that had helped reignite the smoldering embers of their love and turned it into a breathtaking wildfire. For all those beautiful reasons, this little shady slice of paradise now held just as much sentimental value to James as their childhood playground.
James snapped out of his trance when he caught sight of movement in his peripheral vision. He turned to find Lily walking toward him in a white flowing summer dress. The color contrasted perfectly against her honey brown skin. Her hair was blowing beautifully in the light wind, looking just as elegant as her dress. James refused to blink as he gazed at her. In his eyes, she was equivalent to an ethereal angel floating from the heavens to bless him with her presence.
The smile that illuminated on Lily’s face proved she was equally delighted by the sight of her man. She was proud to see that just a few days of intimate sponge baths, home cooked meals, and the pleasures of her body, were already undoing four years of war damage. Hair that was once matted down with oil was now featherlike locks that flowed easily in the wind, underneath James’s Stetson hat. His new black trousers were now nicely filled out, and so, too, was the white long-sleeved shirt, beneath his black suspenders. Lotions and oils, that Lily thoroughly enjoyed massaging into his body, had already helped to shed dead, sunburnt skin to unveil the youthful skin beneath. Lily’s smile broadened to see that his limp was even far less pronounced, as the incredibly strapping man in her sights began to hobble toward her on his cane.
“Excuse me, beautiful lady,” James said, smiling as her sweet scent graced his nose.
“Yes, may I help you, sa’,” Lily replied, playing along.
“I was wonderin’ if an extraordinarily stunnin’ woman, such as yourself, would take pity on a broken man, and have lunch with me?”
“Hmm.” Lily took a moment to think as she looked around their shaded slice of paradise, trying to decide what she wanted her next sentimental memory there with James to be. “Only if you kiss me first,” she finally replied.
Innately knowing Lily’s motive, James laid his cane down and granted her wish. He gently held the sides of her face and kissed her in the most loving, memorable, and sentimental way his lips could manage.
“You’re not a broken man … you’re perfect in my eyes,” Lily whispered when their lips parted.
“That’s all that matta’s to me.” James took her by the hand, kissed it, and led her to the blanket. “Lunch is served,” he said, playfully bowing.
Lily smiled and sat down to enjoy the fine cuisine and aged fine wine. When they finished their meal, Lily got comfortable in James’s arms and finally opened to the very first page of her father’s journal.
May 7th, 1831
Today, my father-in-law gave us one of his slaves. Her name is Maya. Considering the definition of her
name, it is so fitting that she has arrived here in this season. She has undoubtedly enhanced the beauty of spring. I never believed in love at first sight, but after what I felt when I first saw her, I’m starting to think that I can’t make that claim anymore…
Lily immediately stopped reading and whipped her head around to look at James with obvious shock. “Is this real?” she whispered, tears already welling in her eyes.
“Oh, you ain’t read nothin’ yet.” James pulled her closer. “Prepare yo’self, Miss Lily. Once you start readin’ this, I doubt you’ll be able to stop. I’m gonna hold on to you extra tight the entire time, ‘cause this is about to be one hell of a wild emotional ride.” James wiped the tear that finally slid down her face and kissed her cheek. Lily got comfortable in his arms again and proceeded on reading a story that she was now dying to know about.
Chapter Thirty-One