“Hello, Kiln,” she says, her voice cracking. “I knew you’d call me. We have so much to talk about. So much time to make up for.”
My nostrils flare. Instead of responding, I brush past her and head to the kitchen, leaving it up to her to follow me. My forgotten cup of coffee sits on the counter. It’s too cold for me now, so I don’t bother with it. Instead, I walk to the pantry and get a small medical kit I keep close at hand for minor cuts and scrapes.
Opening it, I find the alcohol pads. Once I apply it to my cheek, I hiss at the burning pain. Try as I might, I can’t think of anything other than Raine. Her expression of ecstasy and smiles. Her disbelief and anger.
“Do you need me to clean that up for you?”
Dietrech’s voice startles me but it also reminds me of why she’s here. Touching me is definitely not it.
“No. I don’t.” Grinding my teeth together, I head to the dining alcove, where I ate with Mother and Raine last night.
Dietrech’s heels clip on the parquet floor. At the table, I sit and nod for her to do the same, indicating the chair across from me.
“She gave you a nasty cut,” Dietrech murmurs. “You really should give up the whores you fuck before you end up dead.”
“Raine isn’t a whore,” I correct. “She’s my mistress.”
“A mistress isn’t a girlfriend. Or an ex-wife.”
She’s fishing, asking without asking if I’m off the market. Fuck her. I’m well aware of her sneaky ways.
“Raine didn’t leave this scratch on my face. Mother did.”
Dietrech places her arms on the table and folds them. “I’ve heard Alexia has had problems.”
“From?”
She shrugs.
I refuse to take any further bait from her. “Where’s your kid and husband? How did you and Mother get back into contact?”
“We all have stories to tell, love. But if you want mine, you give me yours first. Where’d you meet Raine? Are you serious with her? You once told me there’d never be anyone else for you but me. That I’d ruined you. You swore you’d never get into a serious relationship again.”
“I misspoke, Dietrech. I was a young man, whose ego and pride had been hurt. You’ve remarried. You can’t expect me to stay alone forever.”
She stiffens and her cheeks flush. “So you intend to marry Raine?”
“What? Of course not.” Where the hell did she get that idea? “I still believe that love is the only reason to marry.”
“You don’t love her then?”
“Fuck, no,” I say in exasperation.
A gleam enters her eyes and she smiles at me. “She’s in love with you,” she says casually, fishing again.
“That isn’t true. If it was, that’s her business, not mine. I have no control over someone else’s feelings. You taught me that.”
“Oh, Kiln. Don’t be naïve. The girl threatened me on your behalf. You obviously trusted her enough to confide in her about the dissolution of our marriage.”
“I was just talking,” I bark in frustration. “Now that you’ve managed to get this shit from me, answer my questions.”
“You still haven’t told me how you two met.”
I glare at her and she sniffs.
“My husband cheated on me,” she says quietly. Her lips tremble and her eyes water. “But he had money. He got full custody of our son. I can’t even see my baby boy.” Tears slip down her cheeks. “I didn’t know what to do. I had nowhere to go, so I called Joe Groveston. He gave me Alexia’s information.” She sniffles.
Maybe, I’m a cold bastard but I feel vindicated. “Karma is a motherfucker, huh?”
She drops her head into her hands and bursts into sobs. Folding my arms, I lean back in my chair and watch her, not in the least moved by her display.
“Are you through?” I ask a few minutes later, when she grabs a paper napkin and dabs at her eyes and nose.
“What has you so unkind and uncaring?” she wails.
“That would be you.”
Springing from her seat, she barrels to me and wraps her arms around my neck, burying my face in the valley of her breasts.
“Kiln, please forgive me. I’m so, so sorry I ever cheated on you. Please! I still love you so much. Sloane—”
I grab her hands and untangle myself from her. “I don’t want to hear anything about Sloane and your fucks.” I get to my feet and shove her away. “I didn’t call you here to discuss us. But it was a mistake to get you here at all.” I can’t do this.
There has to be another way. Mother might be fine when she wakes up. Well enough to continue on as she has been. She has a daily housekeeper and a cook. She knows them, so I can ask one of them to move in with her.
Last night comes to mind. The way they gawked at her, instead of offering help. When I sent them away, they scurried off. They wouldn’t do. Mother likes Dietrech, even after everything. And she needs someone who can handle her.
“Was Raine telling the truth?” Dietrech asks hoarsely. “Did you call me here for Alexia?”
“Yes,” I admit. “But that was a mistake. I’ll figure something else out.”
“No! Please, Kiln. I adore Alexia. If she needs anything, I want to help.”
I shake my head.
“Please. Do you know how much your mother sacrificed for you? If she needs help and you think I can offer her assistance, then, my God, put your pride aside. You owe her that. She deserves that.”
She’s right. That’s why I put my bitterness and hatred aside to call Dietrech in the first place. In this situation, my feelings don’t count. Whatever it takes to help my mother is all that matters.
Turning my back to Dietrech, I lean against the sideboard and heave. Absently, I note a forgotten knife left over from last night. “This is so hard for me.”
I don’t realize I’ve spoken aloud until I feel her hands skim my back.
“I know,” she whispers in a shaky voice. “Alexia has always been an amazingly strong, beautiful woman. But your love for her and concern about her outweighs your disdain of me.”
Dietrech is manipulating my fucked-up situation to her advantage. She’s right, though. I’ll do anything to help my mother. If I point that out to her, though, she’ll deny it and walk the fuck away. I loathe her.
If Raine were here…I scrub my hand over my face. In my head, I hear Raine’s voice. Feel her touch. See her face.
I feel more for her than I should. But she’s gotten under my skin. Last night, she comforted me. Today, she defended me. Yet, one day, when I make her unhappy or fuck-up, she’ll stab me in the back.
“Kiln?”
Mother’s voice makes my insides clench. When I face her, I find her still in the bedclothes Raine changed her into. Despite my mother trying to kill her, she remained at my side. My helpmeet. Doing what I was always too embarrassed to do.
She asked for nothing in return. She did it because I needed her.
“Dietrech?” she whispers in awe. “You’re here. Together.”
“Yes,” Deitrech answers in a soothing tone. “We are. Kiln has asked me to…”
Her voice trails off and she leaves me to fill in the blanks.
More fucking manipulation on her part. This is drama I invited by calling her. Was my subconscious also searching for a way to put a divide between Raine and me?
Am I that afraid of my feelings? Or am I just looking for a tidy excuse?
Or, maybe, I really don’t give a fuck about her.
“Why is my daughter-in-law here, Kiln?” Mother asks briskly.
Sighing, I turn to her. She gasps and her mouth falls open.
“What happened to you?”
As usual, she doesn’t remember her behavior. “Nothing, Mom. Just a slight accident.”
She walks to me and touches my cheek with a trembling hand. “Oh, my son. Who did this to you?”
I grab her hand and kiss it. “It doesn’t matter,” I grit out, on edge.
She nods and steps back. �
��Why is Dietrech here?”
I glance between both women. Hope brightens Mother’s face. Dietrech offers me a gentle smile. After last night, I need a break from seeing my mom as often as I do.
“I invited Dietrech over because I’d like her to move in with you. Just for a few months.”
Mother’s eyes brighten. “Truly, son?”
My reservations vanish at Mother’s happy response. I nod. “Until...” My voice trails off.
Dietrech doesn’t need to know about Sloane’s impending demise. Of course, if I bring it up to my mother, she’ll make it a point to tell her. I sigh. “I have things to take care of, so I won’t be able to spend as much time with you.”
“Of course, Kiln,” Mother says with a huge smile on her face, before she draws herself up. “When you do drop in, please don’t bring that nasty girl with you. Georgiana Mason isn’t welcomed in my house.”
“That wasn’t Georgie, Mom. That was Raine.”
Her happiness slips away and I go on alert. “I don’t care what her name is. She isn’t good enough for you.”
“Raine is perfect for me. She’s sweet and kind and funny.” I’m not sure if I’m serious or not. The words slipped out before I thought better. Almost on instinct. The one thing I’m sure of is it doesn’t matter how I feel about Raine. No one else can talk about her. “You can’t tell me who to be with. It’s my fucking life.”
The moment I speak those words, I recognize my mistake. The wildness I’ve come to dread creeps into Mother’s eyes. One moment, she’s inches away from me and the next she has that knife from the sideboard, holding it to her chest.
“Alexia, no!” Dietrech cries.
Mother presses the point in and blood blooms on her pajama top.
I start toward her but she presses the point in more.
“No, Mom! Please.”
“Raine, Georgiana, whoever was here with you, is a whore,” she snarls. “She told me herself. You deserve better than her. I’d rather die than to watch you throw away your life on her.”
I hold out my hands in supplication, not knowing what to do and frantic to save her. “Mom, you’re right. Do you hear me? I found Raine on the street and I hired her to fuck me. That’s it.” That’s not true. The lie actually sicken me, but I won’t watch my mother die if I can save her. Raine revealed the secret herself. I’m only verifying it. She should’ve shut the fuck up and not put me in this situation. “She’s just warming my bed for a few weeks.”
Mother’s hand holding the knife shakes. “Oh my God! My poor boy. I want to die! How much have you paid her so far? The filthy moneygrubber.”
No, Mom. Raine is no such thing. I want to say that, but I can’t. “I haven’t paid her anything. Now, give me the knife.”
She shakes her head.
“Please, Mom,” I beg, creeping closer to her. “You love me, and it would break my heart if you died. If I had to watch you die. Just give me the knife.”
“No! You’ll only make me sleep. Leave me.”
“I swear I won’t. If you need me to stay for the next week, I will.”
Shit, what the fuck am I saying? There’s no goddamn way I can leave Raine alone for a week. By the time I return, she would be gone and in danger of being found by Sean.
“Alexia,” Dietrech says in a soft, kind voice. “Kiln has things to do. Please put the knife down. He’ll stay with you long enough, so I can get some clothes, then you and I will play a few games.”
Mom blinks and considers Dietrech’s words. A moment passes, before she holds the knife out to me.
I grab it and sag in relief. “We need to see your doctor.”
“No!” Mother cries. “No, please! They shackle me and…and it’s horrible. I even heard them saying they’d let the press see me.”
The press? No fucking way is my mother’s condition making headlines.
“Why didn’t you tell me this before?”
“You said you’d take care of me and allow me to be treated here.”
Impossible promises to my mother, but I’ll do my damnedest to keep them.
“That’s what I mean,” I backtrack. “He’ll see you here. Maybe, do a medication switch. If you need to be hospitalized, there are other places than the one you went to.”
“No! All doctors and nurses hate me. They’ll kill me.”
“I will never allow anything to happen to you,” I swear. “You don’t have to go anywhere you don’t want to. Ever.”
On a sob, my mother launches herself into my arms and I hold her tight.
“I love you, Mom.”
“You’re a good son,” she responds, her usual words to show her approval.
Resentment stirs in my gut. Suddenly, I don’t feel like a good son. My mother is sick, but she knows how to get her way. She knows how to play on my guilt.
“Thank you,” I mouth to Dietrech, unsure how much of what just happened was real and how much was manipulation. Without her, my mother mightn’t have calmed down.
Dietrech nods. “Why don’t I scrounge up breakfast for the three of us.”
Mom lifts her head. “I’m starving,” she says in a normal voice, as if she hadn’t held a steak knife to her chest a moment ago.
“Dietrech, Mom’s housekeeper will be in at two. I’ll give you the schedule of both her and Cook. If you need them to come additional days, let me know.”
“Of course we do,” Mom inserts, grabbing Dietrech’s hand and squeezing. “I’ll make Maid press your sheets the way she does mine.”
Shit. I have to give that poor woman a raise. I’ve never considered the hell Mother must put her through.
“Fine. Whatever you need,” I grouch. “Dietrech, give me your bank information to transfer funds to you.”
She lowers her lashes again.
No matter the fucking reason, all my worst fears have come true. Not only has my mother become a danger to herself, but Dietrech is getting money and a cushy lifestyle, courtesy of me, once more.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Sitting in the den, I await Kiln’s return. My anger at both him and his ex-wife has abated. Fuck Dietrech. Kiln, however, is a different story. The man is completely lacking in relationship skills.
Once I arrived at the mansion, I slept a bit longer, waking up in early afternoon and showering. After eating a small lunch, I found another room to dust and vacuum, and then food to cook. In the process my anger cooled, and clarity took over. Kiln played me like a fiddle, working my temper to his advantage. He depended on my hotheadedness and I fell right into his trap.
Otherwise, he really is a non-human fuckhead, and I’m wasting my time. My fault with him lies in his lack of honesty. He should’ve told me ‘I need you gone because I’m going to ask my ex-wife to watch over Mama Cray-Cray’. He could’ve ended it there, and let the obvious go unspoken: Seeing you here wouldn’t sit well with Dietrech.
Either way would’ve been a welcome change. His boneheadedness is getting old and working on my last nerve. As is my immediately flying off the handle.
I’m annoyed with both him and me for the way we handled the situation. He might not have intentions of keeping me for a long time, but I’m here now. Instead of making my time here a battleground, I prefer our truce.
Of course, that pisses me off, too. Why should I, the woman, have to concede to him, Mr. Alpha Asshole?
Thirty minutes later, he walks in and I answer my own question. He looks exhausted, wrecked, and irritated. Even in his vulnerability, the man is a grouch. That doesn’t matter to me, though. Only he does. I want to show him he’s not alone. His mother is important to him and I admire that. Some might call him a mama’s boy. I just call him a good son. He’s taking care of her at all costs, including a very high emotional toll.
I stand from the couch and smile. He glowers.
“Hey,” I say, ignoring the storm brewing in his gorgeous eyes. I can stare into them for hours. It isn’t only the color; they are so expressive. They burn and sparkle, like
flaming turquoise. “Everything’s settled?”
Wariness creeps into his expression. Instead of speaking, he nods.
“Good. It must be a relief having someone with your mom.”
He rubs his eyes. “Yes.”
“So when are you and Dietrech announcing the date for your remarriage?” I keep the words light, despite the fact that a tiny part of me is worried that he’ll overcome his bitterness and realize he’s still in love with her.
“Never. I’d prefer to feed my cock to a bull shark than to ever allow her anywhere near it ever again. In this life or the next. If we meet up in hell in the afterlife, I’d tell the devil to incinerate my balls first.”
“Um, you know, that would probably be taken care of. It is hell, you know? You’d be burned to bits and pieces upon entry.”
“I don’t think so. You wouldn’t go to hell and get off that easily. You’d have to suffer first. Maybe, then, you’d be roasted.”
“This conversation reminds me of a joke.”
Folding his arms, he grunts. He hasn’t come any closer and still stands just inside the doorway, as if he’s a moment away from walking out. As usual. God, the man is soooo predictable.
“Um, this man ended up in hell and he looked around. Everyone was standing in about three feet of shit—real shit—and talking away. The man thought, ‘oh, this won’t be so bad’. Suddenly, over the loudspeaker, Satan said, ‘all right, motherfuckers, lunch is over. Get back on your heads.”
Hearty laughter bursts from him and his body relaxes.
I beam at him.
“Is that your joke?” he asks around chuckles.
“I wish. Montana told it to me. I think he got it from some joke book.”
He comes to me and pulls me into his arms, then bends and kisses me.
Lifting myself on my toes, I smile against his mouth, enjoying his taste.
“You aren’t angry with me for earlier?” he murmurs between kisses.
“I should be,” I respond, throwing my neck back and giving him access. “You were a supreme dickhead. I’ve thought about it, though, and decided to forgive you this time.”
Phoenix Rising Rock Band: The Series Page 102