by Mark Tufo
“He must not be allowed to gain entry.” Azile moved quickly to the door. She hesitated slightly as she caught sight of the large bird. I’m pretty sure a normal raven stands around two feet high and has roughly a four-foot wingspan. By any standards that’s a big bird. The monster standing on the sill was close to double those figures. I felt like with a proper harness I could maybe cruise the skies with that thing as my ride.
Azile gasped as the bird swiveled its head, his white eye casting an impossibly dark, white light throughout the room. It illuminated nothing yet cast our shadows against the far wall, creepy as fuck, that was.
“Need help now…” fluttered on the softest of air currents. If not for the hole in the window we may not have even heard it. “…by the burning bridge,” was all we heard before the bird squawked loudly and lifted off. Lana had somehow got her sword and it was at the ready. Mathieu had changed over, Azile was saying a spell to dispel the evil that clearly lingered, and me? Well, I was standing there with my mouth wide open waiting for something to fly into it I suppose.
“Was that Tommy?” Mathieu asked in that gravelly voice he had when he was in mid-morph back to his human form.
My first inclination was to say, “yes.” Azile beat me to a response.
“It may have been; it may not have, as well.”
If she was trying to sow seeds of doubt in my mind, she was successful. It had taken root and was actively sprouting at this point. “What’s that mean?” I asked.
“You said it yourself, Michael. You were only allowed to regain your soul in the hopes that you would one day yield it to the great deceiver. Perhaps he grows impatient.”
“This…all of this is a lie?” I knew the answer before the words even made it to the ears of my audience. The great deceiver would be able to pull off something like this, so, why wouldn’t he? Shit pretty much seemed right up his alley. He knew about Tommy and me; most likely knew all about my impetuous behavior. He could pull just about any string he so desired and watch me come running down the hill full-tilt, trip, skid and tumble straight into whatever trap he had erected. He didn’t even need to do anything; I was about to come willingly. Probably be a bigger thrill for him to capture that which had not earned its way to him; big joke on the hairless ape. “I guess I just…just figured I had more time.”
“You cannot go; you must see that now,” Mathieu said in desperation.
“Hold on. We don’t know that it wasn’t Tommy,” I said in defense, though I wasn’t so certain I wanted any. Defense I mean. “The bird is a messenger, right?” I asked Azile.
“But from whom?” Lana asked astutely.
“The bird is more than that…I…I don’t quite know all it is.” Azile seemed to be racking her brain.
“But is it good or bad?” Mathieu needed an answer.
“It is both; or rather, it is neither,” she replied cryptically. “It walks on the edge of a razor; minor fluctuations temporarily give more weight to one side or another but never for long. Its reason for being is balance; it makes no judgement, holds no allegiance.” Azile seemed to be speaking from far off as she pulled knowledge, a long-ago legend from a distant past.
“It’s time.” We spun to see a sleepy-eyed Gabriel wiping his eyes.
I swallowed the lump in my throat that was my heart trying to lurch its way out, so I guess in the end even with all that was going on I managed a status quo, seemed about right for me. Much ado about nothing. Thank you, Shakespeare, for stating every human dilemma so very eloquently.
In the dark of night, after that horrifying experience and now the questions of doubt being raised by my most trusted allies, I was far less inclined to go than I had been just ten minutes before while in the warmth of the living room, surrounded by friends and the comfort of a roaring fire.
“I’m not ready,” Azile said.
“Does not matter. They are ready,” Gabriel replied. Oh yeah, that made me feel better.
“Who exactly are ‘they,’ honey?” Lana asked.
He shrugged his shoulders and kept vigorously working at his tired eyes.
“Are you sure about this Michael? I have not yet been able to weave all of my protection spells.”
“I don’t think there’s time now,” I said. “You all heard the urgency in Tommy’s voice.
“Or the deceiver is fearful that Azile could somehow prevent him from obtaining that which he wants,” Mathieu chimed in.
“Thanks for that,” I said sarcastically. “You wield that kind of power?” I looked to her.
She shrugged, much like Gabriel had.
“Huh. Lot of shrugs going on around here. The last time I saw that many, my kids were much younger and I was trying to figure out who ate a hunk of birthday cake a day early. Yup. Bunch of shrugs then, too.”
“We need to get you into a comfortable position, for once you are in place, it becomes crucial you are not moved; not so much as an inch, or there could be…problems when you realign with your body.”
“Realign with my body? Wait. What?”
“You are not traveling in the physical sense, at least not as you perceive it. Surely you knew that?” she asked.
Somewhere inside of me, I guess I knew that. Just hadn’t really paused to put all the puzzle pieces together, I guess. Plus, some things my brain deliberately hides from me to keep me from freezing up. “Like astral projection then?” I tried to make it sound like a clarifying statement; don’t think it worked.
“Something like that, though I won’t be able to slap your foolish self awake,” she snapped.
“Slap? Why would you want to slap me awake?”
“Even you cannot be this thick,” Mathieu said as an aside.
I wisely said nothing more as Azile led us all to the master bedroom. “Lie down,” she commanded.
I was going to ask her where she would be sleeping but I got the distinct impression she would be doing precious little of that while I was gone, and I didn’t want to be slapped prematurely. I did as she asked, lying on my back. I clasped my hands over my chest. Azile gently undid my hands and placed them down by my side. “You may cut off the circulation if you keep them that way,” she said gently.
“Just now you looked like how we laid you the first time,” Mathieu replied with a shudder.
“Michael, you need to listen to me. You can be injured; you can die where I send you. This physical body will remain here, but you will have a physicality there, as well. I know it sounds strange, but do you understand?”
“Yeah. It’s like I’m getting cloned.”
“You can think of it like that, but this isn’t a body double. Your spirit can only inhabit one shell. Your clone dies, you go with it.”
“I should look into a better stunt double.”
Azile was muttering something, and for the first time in the last few minutes, Gabriel looked like he was awake.
“Are you ready?” he asked as he reached for my hand, never waiting for my response as he clasped it tightly. I’d like to say it was like being in a Star Wars movie, more specifically in the Millennium Falcon when it went (successfully) into hyperspace; at least I would have experienced a transition. In one moment, I was on my bed in my home next to my wife; the next, I was on a bed of thorns in the middle of a vast field full of them.
“Listen to Sebastian…” drifted out from a distant somewhere. I was afraid to move; it felt like my body was being used like a pin cushion, because indeed, it was.
“What are you doing there?” I gently turned my head to the sound and clenched; I think I would have been better off shoving my head into the thorn pile and hoping for the best. It, this…creature, was somewhat like Sebastian, though it was probably ten times the cat's normal size. Its ears were much larger, elongated. The razor-sharp fangs in its mouth were at least six inches long and stuck out of its mouth, much like I figured a saber tooth looked like. The only thing that made me think it was Azile’s familiar was that the colors and striations were the same–oh,
and the blatant contempt it had for me. That seemed about right. Other than that, this was a completely foreign animal. Plus, the thing was talking to me.
In typical Talbot fashion, the smartest question I could manage to ask was, “You talk?”
“Not as such. It is you who understands me; you are thinking in felinese.”
“Huh?” I shifted, slightly fearful I was going to put a thorn through my ass.
“What does one with such greatness see in someone like you? No, I’m honestly curious. She has had many suitors, all were much more deserving of her gifts and beauty, yet she has settled for…I mean chose, of course, someone so…pedestrian.”
“Take the cat, Michael. Listen to the cat. Follow the cat’s lead, she says. I wonder if she knew the cat was such an asshole.”
Sebastian let go something between a lion’s roar and a red fox scream. It was unsettling, frankly it was terrifying. I got a good long look at multiple rows of pointy teeth. I’d not known the cat had a little bit of shark in it.
“I could kill you right here at this very moment and no one, not even Azile, would be the wiser. This is where my spirit dwells; this is my kingdom.”
“I wouldn’t get so high and mighty, cat. It’s an arid shithole covered in barbs. I guess just the kind of place something like you enjoys.” He approached. I noticed he was not walking atop the thorns but rather floating an inch or two out of their reach.
“I am not going out like my friend.” I rolled over, my hands taking the brunt of the maneuver. “Death by cat makes sense in an ironic twisty sort of way, but I’ve got work to do.”
“I respect Azile. She will be one that lives long in the annals of time. I will honor her request that I protect you. But know this, Michael Talbot, I will not place myself in harm’s way to save you, not at any time.”
I couldn’t help it and I was pissed that it happened, but I shied away a bit when the cat reached out a large paw and touched me on the shoulder. I was surprised that I did not feel the pain of his claws dig into me or a torrent of hot blood flowing down my chest. What I got instead was a light and airy sensation as I began to rise. I was still on all fours, but up in the air. I was trying to get my balance as I magically hovered.
“What the hell is happening, cat?”
“I have given you a rise above the grip of the thorns. I could allow you to walk among them, if that is what you would prefer.”
“Let’s not get hasty.” I felt like I was on a sheet of ice; my hand or knee would sometimes shoot out at a strange angle as it sought to gain traction on seemingly nothing.
“It is easier if you do not dwell on it. I would assume not thinking on something would come naturally to someone of your intellect.”
“A cat with jokes. Just what everyone needs in their life.” My right hand shot out and my head dipped down. The point of a thorn came within millimeters of my left eye. Would have popped it out like an olive on a toothpick.
“My name is Sebastian. If you call me ‘cat’ again in this realm, or in any realm, it will be a mistake you will regret.”
“Where are we?” I asked, instead of letting spill a bunch of words that would surely get me in a bucket of hot shit. And believe it or not, I was smart enough to realize when I was completely outclassed and out of my element.
A Cheshire grin appeared on Sebastian's face as he once again reached over, this time he was not so gentle as he batted me in the side. I spun in place like a suspended ball of yarn.
“Where are we?” He repeated my words as I flipped over again. “We are at the gateways to the underworld.”
“And you’re the…err…gatekeeper?” I asked, holding back a little bile.
“I and others like me, yes,” he said as he reached out and, thankfully, stopped me. Without any friction, there was a good chance I would still be spinning around a hundred years from now. Some poor traveler would come across my shriveled remains still going strong like a grotesque pinwheel.
“That’s true? I always said that because of my dislike for your species.”
“It appears in your ignorance you were right, for once. What is that aphorism? Even a clueless moron can fall down on the correct spot occasionally.”
“I don’t think that’s how it goes,” I mumbled. “Your job is to keep people out?”
Sebastian laughed. “If only our task were so simple. That is but a part, a very small part. There are all manner of creatures that we must keep behind the gates. For those fools that willingly enter, well, we simply don’t have the resources available, or the desire, really, to stop them.”
“How far are we from the gate?”
“An eternity, or the mere blink of an eye. Though this is accurate, because of your limited brain power, I do not mean to be metaphorical. This world is not how you would expect it to be.”
“Gee. Thanks, I think.”
“As a human, most of your kind live in only one dimension, and are very reluctant to consider the possibility that more exists beyond what you can see, feel, or touch. You limit yourselves to the few senses you are most familiar with to keep you in tune with your existence. Even those that are open to the idea that there may be other worlds beyond theirs, still believe that their world is far more vast and more significant that any other. In terms of realms, yours is middling at best, perhaps even somewhat below the median.”
“This ain’t my first rodeo, Sebastian. I have been to a realm or two. I know mine is not the only one that exists. As far as ranking goes, I’ll leave that to others, but of course I am going to give more weight of importance to the one I inhabit.”
The cat regarded me for a moment. “This is true; I had nearly forgotten that you escaped the clutches of the passing. I’ll admit I was surprised that someone of your stature made it back. Those journeys are usually reserved for gods, or at least legends—neither of which you are.”
“I hope whatever we have to do here is quick because being around you for too long is its own type of hell.”
It smiled again. Pretty disturbing sight. “I can understand that from my point of view. We will travel to the burning gates; that may be the best place for you to go through.”
“Me? What about you? And why are so many things down here burning? Nobody paid taxes for the fire department?”
“I cannot go through!” The cat seemed alarmed that I would even suggest such a thing. “It is forbidden.”
“Oh, that’s just great. Typical feline response. When someone is in need, just turn away so we can all see your swishing tail.”
“I will allow you this slip in judgment because you are ignorant in the ways of this world. I have no choice in this matter. I do not choose to stay behind simply because I loathe nearly everything about you. I am bound by laws down here that are not as easily breakable as the laws of Man seem to be. I can no more travel across the gateway than you can harbor an intelligent thought.”
“Fuck. If that wasn’t coming from you, it would almost hurt. What do I do once I’m past the gate?”
Sebastian paused and licked his front paws, very reminiscent of a normal house cat as opposed to whatever this gargoyle-like thing in front of me was. “I do not know,” he finally said when he was satisfied.
“Having a hard time figuring out why I need you here.”
“Should you somehow survive, which I am hoping, and predicting, will not be the case, you will need to cross back over. That is why you will need me.”
“Yeah, about as much as I need my own nipples,” I muttered.
“Come, we venture.” He started walking, well, floating, away.
I moved my legs hoping to keep pace. I was basically just spinning my gears, like a truck with a burned-out clutch or possibly Wile E. Coyote as he flies off the edge of the cliff and has a delay before he drops.
Sebastian looked back; disdain was clear amongst his features. “If walking is going to be this much of a problem perhaps you should just go back now and Azile will somehow let Tomas know that you have f
ailed. Pity. For a soulless one he is a rather exemplary being.”
“I’m not throwing in the towel just yet.”
“I would not wait much longer; this place will not be safe for long.”
“Not safe? Not safe from who?”
“Whom. It is from whom.”
“Oh come on. A grammar nazi in hell? Well, wait. Actually that makes sense.”
“What comes, I can neither prevent, battle, nor hide from. We must leave here. It may be better if we ask Azile to call you back now and we can attempt a new insertion point.”
“How do I do that? How do I go back?” I wasn’t in a panic just yet, but a feeling was starting to bubble to the surface as if my instincts were becoming vaguely aware of a threat coming our way. Maybe the cat had me spooked, or maybe some deep, primordial part of me was wired to know when something super fucked up was heading my way. Like Spidey.
I expected Sebastian to put his paw to his forehead and shake his head back and forth. Pretty sure he sighed. “You must fix her image in your mind; concentrate on the love you feel in your heart. You must smell the scent of her in your nose, the warmth of her touch…”
The sight of Azile’s image began to brighten in my mind. “I’m doing it, I see her!” I said excitedly. “It’s like she’s on T.V..”
“I have no doubt it is more her keeping the lines of communication open than your superlative cognitive abilities.”
“I am about sick of your fucking tongue. How about if I come over there and wrap it around your neck…” Unbeknownst to me at the time, Azile could see me, too. I was making my way to him in good fashion before she spoke.
“Michael?” she asked. There was genuine concern in her voice. “Are you in trouble already? You have been gone less than five minutes.”