WILDly

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WILDly Page 13

by T Swanepoel

Chapter 13 – Paparazzi

  The smell of fried onions filled the air and I was compelled to obey when my empty stomach ordered me out of bed. With a frown, I wondered how I had gotten into bed? The last thing that I could recall was the safety belt clasp of the backseat in Alex’s car pressing into my back as I fell asleep.

  I was still in the same clothes, I smelled like a dead rat and I knew that I probably looked like a hobo. Whoever had helped me into bed must have smelled me. It was bad enough that Alex and Benjamin saw me like this, never mind carrying me with this stench around. Oh, the shame!

  The small mirror on the dressing table confirmed that it was as bad as I had thought. I moved closer to examine my face. There was no evidence at all of Duncan’s slap or punch. With a shaky hand, I stroked over my jaw line, my nose and my cheeks. It didn’t even hurt a little. I pressed harder, to make sure, but there was no pain at all.

  My healed face was nothing more than a miracle. Under normal circumstances, the swelling would have stayed for another day or so, not to mention the visible bruises. And now it was completely healed. The only evidence of the events of the past few days was my glow, which was white instead of the normal blue. I felt thankful again, for how lucky I was.

  Then I shivered. It was a scary thought, being a part of all of this... this weirdness. And I couldn’t deny it, not even to lull myself. No, the proof was staring me right in the face. And the knee, I suddenly remembered. I bent over to analyse my leg. The thin pink scar that I had seen yesterday was now almost white.

  This was me now, the girl with the superhero secret. I had to start accepting it.

  With the stench under my nose fast becoming unbearable, I suppressed my enormous hunger and picked up the folded towel and heap of clothes, a pair of jeans and a flowery blouse, from the dressing table. It was girly clothing, but it was about my size, and the tags were still on, so I assumed that it was meant for me.

  The bathroom was right across the passage, with a big shower and a heap of little bottles with soaps and shampoo and stuff. It was heaven to feel the water running over my skin and the soap washing away the past few days. But I couldn’t dwell on things, the hunger rushed me out of the shower.

  Before I left the bathroom, I looked in the full-length mirror. The image was a million times better than before: for one I was clean, and the clothing fitted like my own, not my taste but not bad either.

  My stomach growled. I put the dirty pile of clothes on the bed and turned, letting my shoes follow my nose from the small bedroom to the kitchen, to find Benjamin in front of the stove, busy making brunch.

  The owner had a minimalistic hand to both the furnishing and decorating of the small cottage. The bedroom had no more than one single bed and a dressing table. The kitchen had, apart from the fridge and sink, a big table in the middle and one tall cupboard. But it was a safe house, after all, and maybe this was the norm for safe houses.

  “Oh, it smells soooo good! What are you making?”

  Benjamin looked over his shoulder from the stove, grinning from ear to ear.

  “You’ll see. Go sit there, at the table. It’ll be another half an hour or so before we can eat.”

  I wanted to help, but also didn’t want to spoil his fun. So I did as he said, although a small taste would have helped with my growling tummy.

  “You’re looking and...” he walked closer and smelled my hair, ”dare I say it, smelling better,” he said and winked at me. “And your face doesn’t look like a dandelion any more.”

  I couldn’t hold back the blush, even though he was only teasing. He noticed my discomfort immediately and walked back to the stove.

  “Seriously, are you feeling any better?” he asked, suggesting I inspect myself properly.

  I stretched my arms forward and then my legs, to test again for any pains, but felt nothing. Physically, I was as good as new.

  “Yes, thanks for asking, and thank you for the clothes. I am feeling a lot better. I’ve slept enough for a few ages.”

  “I’m glad to hear that. I guessed your size, and the store lady helped me with the choice of clothes. And with the shampoo and soaps.”

  “You bought all this?”

  “Yep.”

  “Thank you very much, it was very considerate of you.” He had been to an awful lot of trouble for someone who almost had him killed. I felt humbled.

  “Anything, Valerie.” His stare was intense for a short moment. “Can I get you something to drink? I’m having coffee but there’s juice in the fridge if you prefer it,” he offered.

  “That will be wonderful, thanks. Or no, I’ll get it myself. Just point me in the right direction for a glass.”

  Under Benjamin’s instruction I poured myself a glass of orange juice and then sat down again.

  “And how are you feeling? After the accident, I mean? I saw you crashing into us.” I remembered the whole scene, and why it had happened as well. “Oh, Benjamin, I have to say it again. I am very, very sorry for betraying you. You were almost killed because of me.”

  He stopped what he was doing at the stove, walked to me and pulled out a chair for himself. Leaning forward, he took my hand in his.

  “Valerie, look at me. We are not going to talk about it. I don’t want to hear one word about it ever again. It’s in the past.” He bent over and hugged me. “Forgive yourself, get over it and put it out of your mind.”

  Then he got up and continued with the food. It was silent for a while. His kindness brought the tears to my eyes again.

  “Could you pass me the milk in the fridge, please?” he asked. I was glad for the minute chore, it gave me a moment to hide my tears. The fridge was practically empty, but he let me search for it until I was ready.

  “You’re a great guy, you know?” I said as I handed him the milk ages later.

  “Yes, I know. The FHM girls tell me that too,” he joked.

  I sipped my juice while he poured some milk into the food. He stirred the pot once more before he sat down at the table opposite me, deep in thought.

  There was a good vibe between us, and I took the chance.

  “Benjamin, can I ask you a question?”

  “Sure, anything.”

  “Why am I glowing all the time and you guys only glow sometimes?” A possible explanation that I had thought of was that they were stars. But then I would have seen Lisa’s glow; she was a planet as well.

  “We can control it, except during transfers of energy or when our emotions run high, either good or bad. You will be able to control yours as well once you’ve practised a little.”

  “Okay, but tell me something else as well. Why am I glowing white now, and different shades of blue other times?”

  “That’s just because of Alex. He is a regular yellow star, which is an incredibly powerful star. If he transfers energy, it causes close-by ambassadors and most objects to glow white. And I have to add that he was very mad at seeing you so beat up. Me too, you know. Really upset,” he said bitterly, staring deep into the cup of coffee in front of him.

  “Oh,” I answered a little perplexed. Alex cared for me in some way, and clearly Benjamin did as well.

  “Yes, his power is really intimidating, even to me, and I’ve known him for a very long time,” he said, his jaw stiff.

  I didn’t want to think about the episode with Duncan any more, and deliberately focused on everything around me instead.

  “Where are we? It’s test week this week and the first one is tomorrow. I hope we aren’t too far away from campus; I still need to study.”

  The first test on the roster was Astronomy, if memory served me right. It was now my favourite subject in the entire universe. I couldn’t wait to get my hands on my text book, and I didn’t even care what Jennifer would think.

  “It’s no more than an hour’s drive. And we can leave directly after brunch... if you want?”

  “That’ll be good. There’s a heap of studying waiting for me.”

  “In that case, you
can maybe wake Alex. The meal is basically ready.” And with that, Benjamin jumped up to check on the food again.

  I really didn’t want to wake Alex, so I stayed put.

  “He’s sleeping in the last bedroom down the passage,” Benjamin said pointedly, so I got up. But the easiness about the atmosphere had suddenly vanished and I couldn’t figure out why.

  I tiptoed down the passage to the last door. It was closed and I opened it as slowly and softly as I could. Alex was on his side, with his back to me. I hesitated. It felt as if I was intruding. A feeling of uneasiness overwhelmed me and I turned to go. But I stopped in my tracks in the passage, arguing with myself.

  It wasn’t such a big deal, waking someone. Maybe it only felt so wrong because I had placed him on a pedestal in my mind, which wasn’t necessarily a good thing.

  Determined, I turned back into the room to wake him.

  “Alex!” I called, in a semi-soft voice.

  He didn’t move. I walked a little closer.

  “Alex. Alex!” I tried again, but he still didn’t move.

  I stretched out my hand and touched his shoulder.

  He was in a very deep sleep, because my touch startled the poor guy. He jerked awake with a quick intake of breath and almost jumped off the bed. The combination of my awkwardness and his reaction was too much and a giggle slipped out of me.

  “Hey, Valerie,” Alex grinned, embarrassed.

  The giggle stopped in my throat. He didn’t have a shirt on and the sight of his naked chest made me even more uncomfortable.

  “Uh... hi, Alex,” I answered unnerved. “S-sorry,” I stuttered, feeling intimidated.

  “It’s okay. We’re even now.”

  Even? My mind was a big white blank.

  “The day in the parking lot? Remember?” he asked.

  He had that effect on me again. I couldn’t do much but nod.

  He climbed out of bed and stretched out, his full length and unbelievable physique centimetres away. I stood completely frozen, his body close to me, the body of nothing less than a Greek god.

  Then he looked down at me. “Something the matter?” he asked, smiling again.

  It struck me that I had just woken him but I couldn’t remember why. Focus, Valerie! I scolded myself. He was Lisa’s, and I chanted her name over and over in my head.

  “No,” I answered and turned to leave. Then I remembered about the food. “Benjamin said to wake you, he made brunch and it’s almost ready.”

  “Thanks, Valerie.”

  I disappeared immediately.

  In the kitchen, Benjamin was busy with a small fruit salad. He was going all out. My hands were shaking and I plunked down on the closest chair I could find. I didn’t want Benjamin to see how unnerved I was and blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

  “Do you like playing chef?” Most men I knew, which were basically only my dad, preferred to stay out of the kitchen.

  “I do, sometimes. When I feel like treating someone,” he replied with a secretive smile.

  Okay, the message was becoming clear now. Benjamin was really trying hard here. For a moment, I considered that he was trying to impress me, but then decided that he was only being friendly. He’d admitted that he was sorry for me over the terrible ordeal with Duncan. No, he was definitely only being friendly. Besides, he was doing this for Alex as well. Oh, I could be so selfish, thinking the entire universe revolved around me. Just because I had romance on my mind didn’t mean the rest of the world did as well.

  “Can I set the table for us in the meantime?” I wanted to help, keep busy. It wasn’t good to think so much. I only came to the wrong conclusions.

  “You can if you want to, everything is in the cupboard.”

  The cupboard proved to be sufficiently stocked. I found everything in there from an orange and maroon checked table cloth to cutlery, crockery and serviettes.

  Alex walked in, smelling like a bar of soap, just as I finished putting out the last plate.

  “Well, thanks, Bennie. It smells real good. You shouldn’t have.” Alex gave Benjamin a light slap on the back and peeked over his shoulder into the pots. He lifted the lids one by one and commented with a ‘hmmm’ every time.

  “We always beg him to cook for us, but he’s always so busy with all of his wild hobbies,” Alex told me. “It’s high time!”

  “Yes, my friend, I have to admit that it’s been a while. But we have been busy, you know?”

  “Yeah, we have,” Alex said, a little toned down.

  “Wild hobbies?” I asked curiously.

  “Benjamin is an adrenaline addict. He loves anything extreme. From bungee jumping to skydiving to who knows what.”

  I just shook my head. It wasn’t my idea of fun. I was too milk-livered.

  “Hey, don’t make me out as the crazy one. You got me into it!”

  “Guess so,” Alex admitted.

  “You guys seem like good friends.”

  “We are, in spite of the hierarchy,” Benjamin answered.

  “But enough with the waiting now, let’s eat! I’m hungry as an ox,” Alex changed the subject.

  They waited for me to dish up and then we all dived in. It was the brunch of my life, from chicken livers to cocktail sausages, fried eggs and tomatoes, even flapjacks. The table was quiet as we all dug into it.

  Alex stopped eating and raised his glass of juice. “We should be celebrating,” he announced in a formal fashion. He waited for us to finish and pick up our glasses before he continued.

  “We are celebrating the triumph of round one...” he paused. “And we are celebrating life.” Then he turned to me. “And earth.”

  His gaze made me uncomfortable, especially in the presence of Benjamin. I couldn’t move.

  Benjamin rescued me.

  “Yes, to celebrate earth. But we also need to protect her. We need to decide on the... attack strategy,” he flew off at a tangent, letting the cat out of the bag in the process.

  “We? Aren’t we missing a few people, like say, Jupiter for instance? Or any of the other planets? Lisa, maybe?” I asked. He caught me on the wrong foot. It felt wrong, me in the decision chair.

  “Between the three of us, we have veto power. You are the most powerful amongst us, Alex’s powers have the biggest reach and I have all the combat knowledge that we might need. And, Valerie, don’t underestimate yourself. Give yourself a chance before you give up,” Benjamin said.

  He talked right to my heart. I had to learn to trust myself again, but it would take time. I hesitated.

  “I’ll listen. But you guys know that I don’t have any experience with this... kind of thing?”

  “We know,” Benjamin answered.

  “Hold your horses a bit, Bennie-boy. We need to get Valerie on the same page first,” Alex intervened.

  Benjamin moved around in his seat. “If you must, but you need to make it short, Alex. Valerie has studying to do,” Benjamin said.

  “I know. I have to study as well. But Valerie needs to know, this is life and death. And not only for us around the table,” Alex said, more serious than I had ever seen him before. “Let’s start at the very beginning, at what Duncan did to you. Now, just like the earth never sees the other side of the moon, it’s the same with his powers. Only once you have physically seen the other side, the dark side, is his spell broken. No one else can tell you about the other side, you have to experience or see it for yourself. That was the main reason why no one was allowed to tell you anything. Think about it. Once you saw his other side, his spell was broken. Isn’t that right?”

  I thought about it. If he had the power of manipulation, he could have forced me to swallow the sleeping pill. And before that, I was prepared to do anything for him. He even had me believing that Alex and Lisa, of all people, were the baddies.

  “The more I think about it, the more it makes sense,” I answered Alex.

  “You need to understand that we don’t know everything about another ambassador’s powers.
The little we do know is deduced from the physical properties of the sponsoring celestial body and previous encounters with the ambassador. In Duncan’s case, his powers aren’t so much physical but more on the spiritual side. I know a little about his powers because he once pretended to be a friend of mine,” Alex said sourly.

  Benjamin nodded, a strange expression on his face that I couldn’t identify.

  “But back to the point. You grew up under your adopted father’s protection. But the day that you left his house, you became my... responsibility, for lack of a better word. That is why I waited for you in the parking lot that first day, do you remember?”

  I nodded. I did remember, so well.

  “Unfortunately, I’m still a young ru... I’m still new at this. I can sense other strong ambassadors by their gravity, as you can when I’m mad for instance. You sense it in the form of a force, pulling on you. Anyway, I made a mistake, a big mistake. I didn’t sense him, I concentrated on the big guns. And I underestimated him. He patiently waited for you, for a long time, and took the gap when it presented itself.”

  Alex took a sip of his orange juice. I realised it couldn’t be easy admitting to a mistake. He probably blamed himself for all of this.

  “Fortunately, I have another power, which basically saved you that day. I have the ability to see everything on earth, everywhere the sun shines. I have to think of a person and then concentrate on the mental image I have of that person, so it only works on people who I’ve met before. But it is limited in that it has an eight minute delay and limited vision on rainy days. I saw what was happening, Valerie. And it was almost too late. You can just imagine how mad I was. Lisa had to calm me down, I could have exploded,” he said bitterly and started glowing softly.

  Suddenly the eight minute mystery was solved. And the white glow in my room for two weeks.

  It was getting more and more interesting, but also stranger by the second. It didn’t sound like a story that I had played a part in. It sounded like a movie that he had seen and was telling me about.

  “But what was he trying to do, Alex? Was he trying to steal my power? I don’t understand.”

  “We’ve figured out this much. He tried to weaken you. You need to remember, your link was brand new. He actually triggered you. And he also knew that forcing power from you could weaken you enough to disturb the balance.”

  “And where would that have brought him?”

  “He wants to destroy earth, Valerie. He’s jealous. Earth is world- or rather, universe famous. He wants earth out of orbit, so that the moon can take her orbit. Earth is the only one that is exactly the right distance from the sun to be able to support life,” he said, glowing brighter this time.

  It really was about life! I was famous? My heart galloped. I still couldn’t believe it, it was too fantastical.

  “This is really about life, as you said the other day?”

  “Yes, Valerie. It’s the reason for all of this. We are all here to appreciate and revere life on earth,” he said softly.

  If someone had told me all of this three months ago, I would have classified the person as seriously disturbed. Now it wasn’t only a scene that I had been playing in, I had the lead role!

  My mouth fell open. “This is big.”

  Alex ignored my comment. “Okay, now you understand the first attack. I stopped him the first time. So the logical thing was to get me out of the way. I saw that coming, which was why I ordered the Reds to keep an eye out for you. But I underestimated Duncan again. He used a method to weaken me that no one knew was possible. Luckily it was figured out during the emergency meeting.”

  “How did he do it?” Benjamin asked. “I don’t know either.”

  “He blocked my link. Between any two bodies pulling on each other, there is a ‘neutral’ point, as is the case with celestial bodies having mass and gravity. These points are called Lagrange points. Now in space, there are five Lagrange points around any two bodies. Duncan slowly weakened me by placing objects in the form of satellites on each of the Lagrange points.”

  “But why would that weaken your link, Alex?” Benjamin asked.

  “It seems to disturb the balance between the sponsor and the ambassador, and apparently it can nullify the link” he said heavily.

  “No wonder you were out cold!” Benjamin exclaimed.

  “Then the weather added to this dilemma, keeping me from any direct sunlight.”

  I remembered his reference to the weather and his warning the day before he fell into his coma. Now I understood why he had asked me, the night in the cabin, to accept myself and get into a better mood.

  “I’m so sorry, Alex. If only I’d known...”

  “I’m not blaming, I’m explaining. Don’t be sorry. I know you would have acted differently if you knew the truth.”

  “And with you out of the way, he came for me. Or rather waited for me,” I realised.

  “Yes, he waited for you to come to the wrong conclusions.”

  “And I fell right into his trap. So predictable.” One thing was sure, Duncan certainly was a master manipulator.

  “Put that out of your mind and concentrate on our strategy forward. I would like to hear your opinion as well,” Alex urged.

  But Duncan was the moon. What powers could the moon have against the sun?

  “But Alex, why all this hassle? Why don’t you destroy him, if that is possible?”

  “It is possible. But think about the order of the planets: Mercury, Venus and then Earth and the moon. I would risk them all. And I’d probably have to exceed the capacity of my connection.”

  I considered his words. Everything made sense now, but it was a lot to absorb and my brain was boggling. I still had studying to do, but that would be easy against this. Studying was mere facts, where this was life-saving stuff, as Alex had said.

  There was a lot that I had to learn about this new world. And I realised that studying for my test would also help me prepare for the new world that did revolve around me.

  “Anyone for coffee?” Benjamin used the moment of silence. “I need to get up, I don’t have a bum of steel,” he complained.

  “Thank you, Bennie-boy. Breakfast was great,” Alex said and bent backwards as if trying to make space.

  “Yes, thank you Benjamin. It was delicious. And now I’ll make us all coffee, you did everything else,” I offered.

  Benjamin glanced at me. “No, you won’t. You can open your present,” he said with a grin.

  “My present?” Not having a clue as to the occasion or the intent, I frowned. He disappeared into the passage. I turned to Alex with my frown still in place.

  “Your phone was damaged during the transfer,” Alex said with a roll of his eyes, spoiling Benjamin’s surprise.

  I still didn’t understand.

  “It was in Duncan’s apartment. He recognised it by the little green butterfly on the string. He kept it in his pocket and forgot about it. It was damaged by the flow of power when he held you while I healed you.”

  “But a phone is too expensive! I can never accept it!”

  “Oh, he doesn’t even feel it. He’s a Red, remember? They are highly professional and are also highly rewarded for their... services.”

  Just then, Benjamin walked in with a small, wrapped package in his hand and a shy grin on his face.

  “It’s a phone,” he blurted out nervously as he handed me that package. “I broke yours, sorry about that.”

  Benjamin was on the spot and I decided to accept it. There weren’t any ulterior motives after all. I would have done the same if I had broken someone else’s phone. That was if I was in a position to afford it.

  “Benjamin, you’re the best!” I exclaimed. I felt like hugging him.

  His smile widened. “Sure. I’ve asked the store guy to program my and Alex’s numbers, so that you can phone me whenever,” he answered.

  Benjamin made us all coffee and I opened the package. It was a fancy phone, a business type Nokia, with way too
many functions and buttons for a mere varsity student.

  “Thank you, Benjamin.” I walked to him and hugged him under Alex’s staring eyes.

  “It’s my pleasure,” Benjamin answered graciously.

  “Now phone your dad! He was worried when I talked to him yesterday,” Alex ordered. “We can talk strategy afterwards.”

  “No, I’ll rather do that on our way back in the car. I still have studying to do.”

  Everyone took in their seats around the table with coffee in hand.

  Alex didn’t wait to set the ball rolling. “Now that we all know what Duncan wants to achieve, we can strategise our moves. We need to line up our biggest guns and attack when he least expects it,” he said sounding eager.

  “Well, we need to know what we’re up against and what we have available on our side,” Benjamin commented.

  “I agree. But it’s not that easy. On our side we know what we have. The problem is that we don’t know who he has on his side or what powers they may have. I know for one that Lucas, Mars, is on his team from the incident at the party, but I have no idea who else or anything about their powers. If we know who, we could try to deduce it from the physical properties of the celestial body, but it’s not always that straight forward.”

  “I remember someone else with Duncan. His name is Gavin. Do you know him?” I asked hopefully.

  “Yes, I know Gavin: he is not to be underestimated. He’s the closest brown dwarf. But that’s all we know, then. And we shouldn’t leave a possible traitor or two out of the equation. Basically, we don’t and won’t know who or what we are up against.”

  “Were fighting blind,” Benjamin murmured.

  “Valerie, we need to awaken your powers. And quickly. In order to do that, I’m going to do something dangerous.” Alex swallowed and looked at both me and Benjamin with big eyes. “I am going to endanger Earth.”

  “I’m going to... fight?” I asked nervously, suddenly realising what the attack strategy might involve. It made me so nervous that I had to stand up. I looked around for something to do, and found the breakfast dishes conveniently heaped. Benjamin protested, but I ignored him. I couldn’t sit still for one second longer.

  “Yes, you are our biggest... uh... gun. We can’t win this without you,” Alex said. “But it’s nothing like a bar fight, don’t worry. It’s like you’ve seen at the party. Normal people can’t even see it,” Alex explained, slightly amused.

  “Is someone going to die, Alex? Do I need to ... to kill people?” I asked, worried.

  “Only one, the others we can manage,” he answered.

  I stopped and looked at Alex. “Do you want me to kill him? No matter what he did to me, I can’t see myself killing another human being!” I really hoped that I had understood him wrong.

  “Valerie, I’m sorry that we have to ask this of you. But you are the one in this position and only you can save earth. If there was a way to strip him of his link or powers, that would have been our first option.” He drew a breath. “Yes, you are going to have to kill him.”

  “No! It’s too much to ask. I cannot do this!” I exclaimed. “And tell me, what will then happen to the moon?”

  “Nothing. Absolutely nothing will happen to the moon. It will remain where it is, jealous and manipulative and devious as always, but without an ambassador on earth. In a few year’s time there will be another supernova and the moon might send another ambassador. We’ll probably upset him even more, only being able to watch earth at a distance then.”

  “Won’t that only delay the problem? Or even make it worse?”

  “It will, but to be honest, it’ll never stop. He will never ever stop hunting you. Don’t you get it?” Alex was upset, practically screaming at me.

  It went quiet around the table. I turned and kept myself busy with the dishes, deep in thought.

  “I’ll think about this. It’s not something that I can easily agree to, killing someone, you know? It’s not me at all,” I said when I finished.

  “We both can understand that, but you need to hurry. He could attack at any time. I’ll obviously keep an eye out for him. But I’ve underestimated him before. Actually not him so much as the power of sheer jealousy,” Alex said as if to himself.

  I wanted, or rather needed to get away. One moment this new world sounded so glorious. Now it required me to do something horrific.

  My link with the earth was strong. And earth had an almost unique ability to support life. That was exactly who I was and I felt: the very essence of me was to support or revere or love life. And Alex was asking me now to take a life? I couldn’t. Not even Duncan’s, in spite of everything.

  Duncan had made me betray myself under his spell. Now Alex was asking the same of me; voluntarily but not really voluntarily.

  The breakfast aftertaste was bitter in my mouth. I should have expected this. There was no such thing as a glamorous world without a glamorous cost. And maybe this was the price that I needed to pay, the bad part, the paparazzi of being a part of this ... astronomical universe.

  “Can we go now? I still need to study for tomorrow’s test.”

  Alex sighed. “Sure.”

  Benjamin grabbed a few loose things lying about. I went to my room to tidy it and then grabbed my dirty clothes from the bed and my new phone from the kitchen table.

  We were quiet and the atmosphere was downbeat in the car all the way back to the dorm. Not even the upbeat music or the scenic drive made it better. Or my new fancy phone.

  I wasn’t ready to talk to my dad yet either, and couldn’t get myself to phone. Instead I asked Alex to let them know that I was fine. After all, he was responsible for me. I rolled my eyes at the thought.

  I looked out the car window and I could feel the moon was laughing at me.

  They dropped me in front of my dorm.

  “Thanks for breakfast, Benjamin. And thank you again for my new phone. I’ll see you around?” I asked hopefully. I liked having him close by all over campus.

  “I’ll be around, Val. Take care of yourself,” he smiled.

  “See you Alex,” and I got out of the car with that.

  Alex called me back.

  “Valerie, I’m sorry for asking this of you. Please consider it carefully,” he begged as soon as I answered.

  I didn’t need to ask what. I shook my head. “Alex, I can’t do this. I cannot go against my own beliefs, even if it means saving the earth.”

  “For your parents? For the next guy on the street? For the survival of man?” he asked.

  I stared at him wordlessly. He was still my Alex, he looked the same as always.

  And then softer: “For me, Valerie?”

  He knew how I felt about him, I thought. Was he using it?

  I couldn’t answer and walked away with raindrops falling on my head.

  The astronomy text book stared at me. I was in my room, behind my desk, supposed to be studying. Only yesterday there was a moment that I’d thought it was my new favourite subject in the world. Now I felt too conflicted to open the textbook.

  I’d done everything but study after they’d dropped me: I collected notes from Lisa and gave her an update, I did my laundry, I cleaned my room, I reorganised my closet, I visited Jennifer and told her a conjured up story about Ronald. She clearly didn’t know he’d been in an accident.

  Now there wasn’t much else left to do that I could think of. And time was running out. The sun was setting already and the test was scheduled for ten tomorrow morning.

  I’ve never flunked a subject before. I didn’t want to flunk this test either. It would jeopardise my entrance to the final exam. And that would jeopardise my entire first year. and all of my parents’ life savings.

  I had no choice. I had to study. And fast. I opened the thick book reluctantly...

  ***

 

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