by J. L. Beck
The song ends right then, and I release her like she’s a venomous snake that’ll strike at any second, refusing to give in to the need burning through me, the need to make her hurt, to feel my pain. Turning around, I stalk off the dance floor and back over to Clark, who is smiling like a fucking asshole. I hate her, but I also want her.
I grab my beer from him and down the entire thing at once. I don’t want to see her face again. I can’t handle seeing her play the innocent little girl when I know all too well that she’s a liar. A beautiful one at that.
28
Ava
What the hell was that?
My whole body is shaking as I watch Vance walk away. I’m not sure what I expected our first interaction to be like, but it certainly wasn’t like that. My hand is still warm from where he was holding onto it and I think he burned a hole in my dress where he was touching my hip.
Why is he so angry with me?
I’ve been watching him from afar all day. Too scared to talk to him after so long. It didn’t take but one look for me to know that the boy I had known since I was a young child was no longer a boy, but now a man.
A dark, broody, man that apparently had it out for me. His warning rung inside my head. Disdain dripped from his words, there was venom in his eyes and he wanted to inject me with it, but why?
I couldn’t take my eyes off of him, or forget the way he looked down at me during our dance. The image will forever be ingrained in my mind, and I don’t understand why. He’s handsome as sin, his hair the same russet brown, but cut shorter on the sides and longer on top. His jaw is sharp, and his cheekbones are high. And those green eyes of his, seem darker now, holding secrets that I plan to expose. Obviously time has been good to him, he looks like he walked off the cover of a GQ magazine.
Shaking my head, I will the images away. Trying to forget how it felt when he touched me. Those butterflies I got in my stomach all those years ago, it felt like there was an entire zoo of them taking up residence inside me. His sudden hate for me is nothing but confusing. It should be me who is mad, not him. I’ve lost everything, and he...he got it all. Just like Henry and my mother, he got everything he wanted.
The poor boy he used to be, the one with nothing had everything now, and the roles were reversed. The girl who once upon a time, had it all, had nothing.
People start to flood back onto the dance floor, and I realize that I’m still standing in the middle of the room. Everyone joins in to celebrate the happy couple and I force my lips to pull into a smile as I smooth a nervous hand down the front of my dress.
I feel dizzy, drunk, and all from one simple dance.
It takes me a moment to compose myself and get my legs to start moving again, but once they do, I find my way out of the crowd, walking toward the bridal party table. I look around, trying to find my mother in the sea of bodies, but all I see is hundreds of faces that I don’t know.
All my fears start to trickle into my mind. A knot forms in my throat. I’ve never felt so out of place in my life. Like a flower in a sea of weeds, I stick out, drawing unwanted attention.
I heard some of the guests whispering about me, about how my mother only married for money, and how my father was a drunk. Their words stung even if they weren’t directly said to me. It almost hurt more that they said them behind my back.
Trying to soothe the ache in my chest, I remind myself that I’m not here for anyone else, but still Vance’s warning isn’t something I can just shake off. Surely he didn’t mean what he had said? Maybe he was joking? Yeah, I don’t think so...
I glance around the room again, silently searching for him, but he’s nowhere in sight. And suddenly I’m reminded of why I never should’ve agreed to come here.
Everyone around me seems to be having the time of their lives, drinking, dancing, singing while I’m standing in a corner of the room alone. I don’t need anyone to tell me that this isn’t where I belong, that this isn’t where I should be. Vance and my mother have already proven that tonight. And yet I have nowhere else to go, nowhere else to be. And somehow, I wish my past was my present. Where Vance and I were friends again. Where my parents were still together, and I had never discovered the one secret that shattered my world.
After the wedding last night I went to bed, tears filling my eyes while I prayed the next day would be better. All thoughts of Vance were pushed to the back of my brain, along with his anger toward me. College was what I needed to be focusing on, making something of my shit life. All I could do was keep pushing forward, remembering that things could be worse.
Waking up the next morning, I had hoped I could spend some time with my mom before she and Henry left for their honeymoon, but it was obvious that wasn’t going to happen as soon as I woke up. I had barely seen her yesterday and today she was absent, nowhere to be found in this enormous house. In fact, I hadn’t seen anyone except the housekeeping crew.
Disappointment settled heavy in my gut. When will I ever come to terms with the fact that my mom is and always will be, absent from my life. Five years ago, I didn’t just lose everything, I lost my mom. Finding her that night, seeing her…
Squeezing my eyes shut, I will the memory away. I press my curled fists into the Tempur-Pedic mattress and exhale through my mouth. After a few moments, I feel calmer and open my eyes.
At least I haven’t run into Vance yet, and after his cryptic threat last night I’m more than thankful for that. I’m not quite sure what to make of him. I was too shocked by his words to form a single sentence last night. I wanted to respond but I couldn’t, my vocal box refusing to work.
Most of the morning is spent hiding in my room, sneaking out to grab some breakfast from the kitchen before retreating back inside it. It feels weird staying here, eating food without asking. This doesn’t feel like a home to me... it feels like I’m more of a guest…an unwanted guest at that. When I hear voices carrying through the house, I pop my head out my bedroom door and into the hallway.
I don’t see anyone, but I can hear my mom’s high pitched giggles and Henry’s deep laugh. I bound down the stairs like a kid on Christmas morning, beyond excited to see my mother, and maybe get a chance to spend some time with her. When I reach the bottom step, I’m met with disappointment once again because I know my mother isn’t staying here. Not with them pulling luggage out of the hallway closet.
“Hey, sweetheart. We’re about to head to the airport,” my mom greets me.
“Oh, okay,” I say, trying to hide the hurt from my voice.
Shouldn’t I be used to the let down by now? I feel like one of those kids that wait outside all day for their parent to pick them up, but they never come. That’s my mother, never showing up, never caring.
“Sorry we weren’t here when you woke up, we had some last minute errands to make,” she explains while looking through her carry-on bag. She doesn’t even look up at me as she’s talking, which only grates on my nerves further. I’m her daughter, not some piece of crap, the least she could do is give me a sliver of her attention.
Henry starts to wheel out the first suitcase and that’s when I spot someone moving behind him, walking through the door.
Vance. The air around me becomes electrically charged. The fine hairs on my arms sticking up at his entrance. When we were kids, I thought he was disgusting. I mean, I thought all boys were. But now… now I’ve come to realize that Vance is anything but disgusting. He’s sin dipped in chocolate.
“There you are. I need to talk to you before we leave,” Henry says, propping the suitcase up against the door.
“What is it? I’m busy,” Vance snaps, his gaze on his phone rather than his father. His muscles tense and as if he feels my eyes on him, he lifts his eyes to mine, giving me his full attention. I should look away, it would be the smart thing to do, the safe thing but I’ve never taken the easy route and it’s not like he doesn’t already know he’s disgustingly gorgeous, drawing all the attention and air out of the room.
I’m simply window shopping, looki
ng is just fine. Plus, he hates me anyway, and I’m totally not checking him out. Taking in his appearance, I see he’s wearing a pair of jeans, Wrangler, I think, that hang low on his hips, rather than a designer pair. He’s matched his simple jeans with a plain cotton t-shirt, and a pair of black boots. He looks more like the boy from my past than he did yesterday in his suit and tie.
Swallowing, I imagine the body he’s hiding beneath that cotton shirt. Does he have a six-pack? Are his muscles stone, and chiseled from rock? God, I need to stop thinking about him. Somehow I snap myself out of the trance his presence has put me in and lick my dry lips. Hopefully, I’m not drooling. The last thing I want is for him to know that I’m attracted to him.
Henry ignores his son’s attitude. Obviously he’s used to it. “There’s been some changes… I know I’ve told you both that you could live on campus after classes start, but Laura and I decided it would make more sense if you guys just lived here instead—”
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” Vance interrupts his father, his gaze turning murderous.
“It’s only a twenty-minute drive to campus, plus you can ride together. It will be good for you two to spend some time together. Catch up,” Henry adds.
Vance makes a snorting noise, his eyes rolling so far to the back of his head I’m afraid they might get stuck back there.
My mom smiles nervously, her gaze moving over each of us, as if she’s trying to avoid confrontation. How typical of her. Always avoiding the important stuff.
“We can talk about this more later, but I want to make it clear to you right now…” Henry’s staring at Vance and using what I would call his authoritative dad voice. “I want you to watch out for Ava. Show her around, treat her as a friend. Remember when you guys used to be friends? Maybe you can find your way back to that?” He pokes fun, but nothing about this scenario is fun. I’m stuck in a house with a man that hates me for no apparent reason and has a serious anger problem that apparently only I see.
Speaking of angry man, his hard eyes cut to me. “She’s a big girl. She can take care of herself. Can’t you, Ava?” I don’t miss the dig he makes at me, but I don’t give him the satisfaction of responding either. The dude clearly has got some mental issues, and there’s no way in hell I’m tangling myself in that web of bullshit. I’ve got my own problems, no need to add his to my heaping pile.
Henry sighs impatiently. “Watch out for her, Vance. I mean it. If you don’t, there will be consequences.”
The warning is clear like a neon sign hanging in a bar window, fail to comply and his father will bury him. In what way, I don’t know, but I’m curious. Vance doesn’t take me as the kid that will just take his punishment and let it be, plus he’s an adult. What can his father do to hurt him? Take away his trust fund? I almost chuckle at my own joke. Silence settles over the four of us. It’s uncomfortable and makes me want to retreat back to my bedroom.
“Oh, I’ll watch out for her...” Vance finally says, his lip curling, a sinister smile forming on his sensuous lips. I can’t help but gulp at the intensity of hate in his eyes. My skin burns and my cheeks heat without permission. It sounds more like a threat than an obligation to actually protect me and I vow not to put myself in a situation that will require me to need him. I can’t rely on him, just like I can’t rely on my mother.
Before anyone can say anything else, he turns and walks out of the room. Tension clings to the air, like peanut butter stuck on the roof of my mouth and my lungs burn as I release the breath I wasn’t even aware I had been holding in, my chest sagging as I do.
I want to ask where he’s going, but it’s not really any of my business and I tell myself I don’t care, even though I kinda, sorta do. He can do whatever he wants. I mean, it’s better like this anyway. Maybe if I stay out of his way, he’ll stay out of mine. No conflict means no problems. Hopefully we can get along, at least until our parents get back.
“When I get back, we can have a spa day, and maybe do some shopping for your bedroom.” My mother’s singsong voice meets my ears and I skew my facial expression, giving her a megawatt smile instead of a disappointed frown.
“Of course, that sounds great.” And it does, but it would’ve sounded better three years ago. God, I need to let go of my disappointment in her, of the past. There isn’t shit that can be done to change what happened. Life is cruel sometimes, suck it up and move on, right?
“Good, good. Well, I love you, sweetie. I have a flight to catch. I’m sure everything will be fine with Vance. He’s a little moody sometimes, but don’t let him get you down. He’ll come around.” My mother gives me a hug and a kiss on the cheek before walking away.
Henry gives me a soft smile a moment later before following behind my mom, a checklist of things rattling from her mouth. I stand there in the entryway, my feet cemented to the floor for a long moment.
Alone. All over again, I am alone. Tears sting my eyes, and I try to swallow the emotions down but just like vomit, refusing to be subdued, the tears keep coming.
“It’s sad, isn’t it?” His deep voice sounds against my ear a moment before his scent meets my nose. Citrus and soap. Clean, spicy. I whip around, wiping the tears from my eyes.
Where did he come from?
“What’s sad?” I croak.
Those green eyes of his narrow in on me and his head cocks to the side in amusement, or maybe curiosity. It’s almost like he’s trying to read my soul, trying to suck the secrets right out of me. No. No, I won’t show him how weak I am. How broken I feel on the inside, that I’m one pull string away from unraveling completely.
He steps closer, his firm chest pressing against mine. Caging me. He’s all perfectly sculpted muscle and stupid gorgeousness and I want to rip my gaze away, but I can’t. I’m pretty sure he means to intimidate me, and he does, easily since he’s a whole foot taller and has at least one hundred pounds on me but there is another feeling, rising up, poking through the tremble of fear and it’s a strange one, one that spreads warmth through my belly.
I’m forced to crane my neck back to keep eye contact with him. Breathing deeply, I suck more of his intoxicating scent into my nostrils, my nose wrinkling at the scent. Not only is he stupid gorgeous, but he also smells like a fucking supermodel.
Who the fuck is this guy?
“The fact that she doesn’t care about you. The fact that you’re here and she still doesn’t want you. Why don’t you face the facts, Ava, no one wants you. No one. You’re an unloved liar.”
He could have slapped me, and it would’ve hurt less than hearing him speak my truths. Curling my hand into a tight fist, I try and tell myself it’s not worth it to punch him in his fucking face, because I really, really want to punch him in the face.
He doesn’t know what my life has been like since that night five years ago, and I guess a part of me should blame him...if he hadn’t dared me…
He leans into my face, his eyes flicker to my lips and for a moment, I think he might kiss me and I kind of want him to. I want to bite his lip, draw his blood, make him feel the pain that resonates deep within my chest every time I take a breath. But as fast as the thought appears in my mind, it disappears at the sound of his gravelly voice.
“If you were smart, you would leave now. With both our parents gone, there won’t be anyone to protect you...no one to save you from me.”
He can’t possibly be threatening me again, and yet that’s what it sounds like, no, it’s not a threat. It’s a promise.
“I’m not scared of you, Vance. What reason would I have to fear you? And why are you so mad at me anyway? It’s not my fault our parents got married and you got stuck with me for a stepsister,” I sneer, the closeness of his body to mine making me dizzy.
His head tips back and a bitter laugh fills the space. “You think this has to do with our parents getting married?”
My brows knit together in confusion. What the hell else could it be about? I’ve done nothing to him, hell I haven’t even seen him in f
ive years. He must be mentally unstable, conjuring up things inside his head.
When I don’t say anything, he starts to shake his head in disbelief, his body vibrating with rage that reaches inside me and sticks to my bones.
“Liar. That’s what you are. A fucking liar. And guess what, you can’t lie your way out of this one, nothing will save you from me. I’ve seen the truth, heard it first hand and I’ll get my revenge on you, Ava. I’ll hurt you until you beg me to stop.”
“I…” Words lodge in my throat. “I don’t understand.” I blink rapidly, his frame still towering over mine, making me feel as if I’m an inch tall.
“You will soon enough, and if I were you. I would watch my back. You never know when someone’s going to lodge a knife in it.” With one last cold sweep of his eyes, he pushes past me and out the front door. His words leave me feeling cold, and a sliver of fear cuts through me.
Whatever happened to the boy with soft eyes that never stopped smiling?
29
Vance
Beads of sweat slip down my face blurring my vision. I hit the punching bag at the gym until my knuckles scream at me to stop and the muscles in my arms shake with exhaustion. The rage inside my veins dulls to a low simmer, instead of torrid fire. That lying minx thinks she can come back into my life and play me for a fucking fool. Batting her eyes at me like she is an innocent little girl.
Fuck her.
“Jesus, dude,” Clark exclaims next to me. “Calm down, you’re showing off your hulk skills. Everyone’s going to be jealous.”
Glancing over at him, I see genuine concern flash in his eyes, even though his words are playful. I stop throwing punches and place a hand against the punching bag, leaning against it.
“Just getting in a good workout,” I half lie. Clark knows all too well about my boiling rage and need for vengeance. Usually my temper is in much better check, but with Ava around, I’m one match strike away from exploding.