“You know, I could make a trash bin for your car out of a cereal container,” I said.
“That’s okay. I’ll clean the car out one of these days.” He chuckled. “Or sell it and let someone else deal with the mess.”
“At least let me do an air freshener,” I said. “I saw a cool video about how to make one out of a clothespin and some cotton balls.” Yes, it was probably less work to just buy a car air freshener, but where was the fun in that?
“Lexi, don’t worry about it. Really.” Dad glanced over at me as we stopped at a red light. “How are you doing? Are you okay?”
“Fine,” I said. Fine, fine, fine. How could I admit to being anything else when my parents were already so stressed out?
“This could be the last surgery,” he said when we started moving again. “The doctors said that if Bug heals okay from this one, we might be in the clear.”
Could. Might. When it came to Austin, we never used words that actually meant anything.
When we pulled up to the Antique Barn, I ran inside and found Ms. Hinkley sitting at the counter eating some yogurt.
“Lexi, is everything all right?” she asked, putting down her spoon. Her eyes flicked over to my dad waiting in the car.
“Yes, um …” I didn’t know how to explain, so I forged ahead with something like the truth. “I left something here yesterday, and I wanted to get it because I thought it might be good luck.”
Her face softened. “Sure. Grab whatever you need.”
But when I got to the back of the store, I realized my piles were gone. “Ms. Hinkley!” I cried, running over to her. “The stuff I went through yesterday, where is it? The trash pile? Where’s the trash pile?”
“Oh, I …” She blinked. “I put it in the bins out back. You were right, none of it was worth keeping.”
I dashed to the back door and threw it open. Then I rushed over to the line of trash bins. Normally, I wouldn’t even think about touching them without gloves on, but this was an emergency. I pulled off one lid after another, riffling through broken clothes hangers, greasy take-out containers, and packing peanuts.
And then, finally, under a moth-eaten curtain, I found the velvet bag. The tag was stained with what looked like coffee, but when I opened the bag, all four stones were inside.
I poured them into my hand, the stones clinking together in my palm. There it was. The Health stone. I squeezed it as tightly in my fingers as I could, closed my eyes, and wished.
At the hospital, we waited and waited for Austin to get out of surgery. After some pacing, Dad settled in to answer work emails on his iPad and told me I should try to get some homework done. But there was no way I could focus. I was so jittery with nerves, my legs couldn’t stay still and my fingers couldn’t stop tapping on my notebook. The wishing stone had to work. It had to. Then we’d never have to worry about Austin being sick again.
“Feel like taking a walk?” Dad finally asked when my hands and feet were practically doing a drumroll. “How about you go get us some snacks from the cafeteria?”
“But what if—”
“Take my phone,” Dad said, slipping it into my hand along with some cash. “If we hear anything, I’ll call you from the nurses’ station.”
I grabbed my bag and headed down the hall of the children’s wing. It had been a while since we’d been here, but I still remembered my way around. It felt strange to be by myself, though. In the past, Mom or Dad was always with me. Now I was riding the elevator alone, surrounded by nurses in scrubs and old folks with walkers. As I got out on the ground floor, even though there were people bustling all around me, I suddenly felt totally alone.
Amazingly, the first person I saw when I walked into the cafeteria was Elijah Lewis-Green. At that second, he looked up and waved.
I bought some snacks for my dad and a lemonade for myself and then headed to Elijah’s table. Even though I barely knew the guy, I was suddenly glad to see him.
“Hey,” he said, pushing up his blue glasses. “Grab a seat.”
“Thanks,” I said, plopping down opposite him. There were drawings spread out across the entire table. “What are you doing here?”
“My mom’s shift is up soon, so I’m waiting until she’s done.” He moved some of the papers aside so I could put my food down. “How are things going?”
I started to say “fine,” but the truth slipped out instead. “My brother is in surgery right now. It’s taking forever. You don’t think that’s a bad sign, do you?”
Elijah shook his head. “My mom—Mama Dee—is a nurse, and she always says that surgeries take as long as they take. Nothing we can do about it.”
“But we should be able to do something about it,” I said. “It’s not fair that we have to sit and wait.”
“Yeah, it’s not fair,” Elijah said matter-of-factly. He was so calm and relaxed about everything. I tried to imagine what that would feel like, but it seemed impossible.
“So what are you drawing?” I asked.
He glanced down at his scattered sketches. “You know how I made that Batman picture for your brother? I started thinking that I could make cards for the other sick kids here. I spend so much time at the hospital anyway, you know? Might as well use it to make something awesome.”
“Wow, that’s really nice of you,” I said. “Thanks again, by the way. My brother loved the picture.” I glanced at my dad’s phone. No missed calls.
Elijah shrugged and started sketching again. “Yeah, no problem.”
Silence fell between us, but it wasn’t the loud kind of silence that had been happening with Cassa lately. Elijah drew and I sipped my lemonade, and it was actually nice to quietly coexist for a minute.
“What’s it like being homeschooled?” I asked after a while.
“It’s good,” he said. “There are tests and lessons I have to do, but my moms let me set my own schedule so I still have time for art. That way I don’t get bored like I did with regular school.”
I couldn’t imagine being home all day with no real schedule. “But how do you know if you’re spending time doing the right things?”
“I guess I don’t worry about it.” Elijah smirked as he glanced down at my hands. Without realizing it, I’d started putting his drawings into neat little piles. “You should try not worrying sometime. It’s kind of nice.”
I snorted. “I’m pretty sure I was born worrying. My mom says that I started grinding my teeth before I even had teeth.”
That made Elijah laugh, and I couldn’t help smiling too. For a second, at least, I felt a little lighter.
Then Dad’s phone started buzzing in my hands. “Hello?” I said, my voice barely a whisper.
“Austin is out of surgery,” Dad said on the other end.
I leaped to my feet. “Gotta go,” I told Elijah. I barely heard his reply as I ran out of the cafeteria. Only when I was in the elevator did I realize that I’d forgotten the snacks I’d bought. But there was no way I was going to waste time going back to get them.
In the waiting room, Dad was standing at the window, staring out at the buildings below us.
“What’s going on?” I nearly shouted. “How is he?”
Dad turned toward me, and I was stunned to see him smiling. Really smiling. “The surgery went perfectly,” he said. “The doctor said this might be it, Lex. This might be the last time.”
I let out a long, long breath, as if I’d been holding it for years. It had worked. My wish had worked! Maybe Elijah’s positive attitude was rubbing off on me, because even though Dad had said the dreaded “might” word, I knew, just knew, that Austin was finally going to be okay.
After Austin was back in his hospital room and “resting comfortably,” Dad insisted that Mom and I head home for the night. “Go get some rest,” he told us. “Bug and I will be fine here.” Dad had looked exhausted earlier that day, but he was all smiles now.
When I got home, I used my mom’s computer to check my email and found one from Cassa wondering how
Austin was doing. Are we still on for Saturday night?? she asked at the end. For once, she hadn’t said anything about inviting Marina along, and it made me smile in relief. Things between us were fine. I didn’t have to doubt that anymore.
I quickly wrote back to let her know Austin was okay and that our usual Saturday-night plans were on. I couldn’t wait to eat popcorn and Junior Mints without Marina judging us for mixing them together, and to watch the latest episode of Unbelievable Medical Mysteries, the one about the boy who was born with his heart outside his body. Cassa would probably be grossed out as usual, but I loved those shows. If people could go through that kind of bizarre medical stuff and be okay at the end, then surely Austin would be fine.
When I got into my pajamas and climbed into bed, for once I didn’t have the feeling that there was something I was forgetting, something I should be doing. And for the first time in a long time, I actually fell asleep without worrying.
When I woke up in the morning, something was off. But I was in my own bed. Everything in my room was where it was supposed to be. And Austin was okay. When I sat up, I finally realized what was different. My jaw didn’t hurt! I had to laugh as I remembered my conversation with Elijah. Maybe my lifetime habit of grinding my teeth was finally over.
Mom had all our bowls and plates out on the counter when I went into the kitchen.
“What’s all this?” I asked.
“I figured I’d run them through the dishwasher again,” she said. “Never can be too careful with the things we eat off of.”
I knew what she really meant was that we could never be too careful with the things Austin ate off of. Even though those dishes were already sparkling clean and he probably wouldn’t be home for days. But this was how we coped with things in my family. I obsessed and Mom sanitized. Austin had obviously gotten most of his personality from Dad. Lucky kid.
“Here,” Mom said, handing me a cereal bowl that was still scalding hot from the dishwasher. “This one should be clean.”
As I went to pour myself some Cheerios, Mom said, “After you’re done eating, we can head over to the hospital.”
“Wait, what? I have to go school.” I wanted to visit my brother, of course, but what if messing up my schedule knocked things out of balance again?
“Lexi, you can miss one day. You have a good excuse.”
“I know, but …” But there was no way to explain it in a way that my mom would understand.
“You are so much like your grandmother sometimes,” Mom said, giving me a warm smile. “She was pretty much married to her routine. I’m afraid that since Austin was born, you’ve become even more like her.”
It was true. I’d always been particular about stuff, but when Austin was in the hospital that first time, that’s when I’d made my deal with the universe. I’d promised to get good grades and never miss school and do all my chores, if only Austin would be okay. I’d been convinced that if I could just get everything right then nothing else would go wrong. And it had worked! Austin had recovered enough to come home, and ever since then, I’d been desperately trying to keep the universe happy.
“We can’t lose sight of what’s most important, okay?” Mom added.
She was right. Being there for Austin was more important than sticking with my routine. Besides, if my wish kept working, it might not matter if I veered from my schedule for one day. Just in case, though, I should probably use the rest of my spending money to get some more four-leaf clovers from Felix tomorrow.
When we got to Austin’s hospital room, I was surprised to see him sitting up in bed, totally awake. Usually he was on so much pain medication the first couple of days after surgery that he’d be too groggy and cranky to do much besides watch cartoons.
“The doctor was in a little while ago and said Bug’s making a miraculous recovery,” Dad told us, his eyes shining.
My heart felt warm in my chest. Miraculous, or magical? Or just good karma. It didn’t matter what it was. Only that it was working.
Mom busied herself scanning through Austin’s chart and asking him a million questions about how he was feeling until he started trying to hide under his pillow. Sometimes she sounded like one of the doctors.
“How’s it going, buddy?” I asked, giving my brother’s nose a honk.
He smiled back at me. “Kinda boring. Did you feed my turtles?”
“Yup,” I told him. “Those guys are pigs!”
“They’re not pigs. They’re ninjas!” he said. Then he started pretending to spin a pair of nunchucks over his head like the characters in those goofy cartoons he was always watching.
“Austin, careful of your IV!” Mom called, but she was smiling.
It was Dad’s turn to head home so that he could take a shower and change, but before he went, he turned to me and said, “Oh, Lex. A boy named Elijah dropped this off for you.” He handed me a paper bag. Inside were the snacks I’d accidentally left in the cafeteria along with another Batman drawing for Austin, this one of the two of them water-skiing.
When Austin saw the picture, his entire face lit up.
“I’m winning a race against Batman!” he cried. Sure enough, Elijah had drawn it so that Batman was firmly in second place. Austin was even more excited when he saw that I’d remembered to bring his Batman action figure from home.
“Who’s Elijah?” Mom asked me as she settled in to read some comics with Austin and Batman.
“Just a kid from school,” I said. “Actually, not anymore. He’s homeschooled now. He’s an artist and he doodles all over his clothes …” Mom’s eyebrows went up, as if she thought maybe Elijah was more like a boy-boy than a friend-boy. “His mom works at the hospital, that’s all.”
“Mom, Mom, Mom!” Austin said. “Can you scratch behind my ears?”
Mom laughed softly and did as he asked. Austin curled up against her and kept flipping through the comic book, looking like a happy kitten.
“It’s nice to see you finally making some new friends,” Mom said to me.
“I thought you loved Cassa!”
“Of course I do. But you’ve always been so afraid of new things, Lexi. I don’t want it to hold you back in life. I mean, look at your aunt! I don’t want you to struggle the way she has.”
I almost choked. I might have been Grandma Jean’s clone, but Aunt Glinda and I couldn’t be more different. When I tried to tell Mom that, she only gave me an “if you say so” look and turned back to Austin.
On Friday morning, I was exhausted from staying up late studying for my math test. I had to get a good grade, especially since I’d missed a whole day of school. Just because things had been going well lately didn’t mean I could give up on my deal with the universe. It was finally holding up its end of the bargain. I couldn’t start slacking now.
When I got to the footbridge, I was relieved to see Cassa waiting for me as usual. But she wasn’t reading one of her history books. She was staring at the trees, nervously twisting one of her curls around her finger.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“Oh, nothing. It’s just … I still haven’t heard from Marina. She wasn’t in school yesterday, and she hasn’t called or anything. I tried stopping by her house, but no one was home. I know you said she’s okay, but I’m kind of worried.”
“She’s fine,” I said. Maybe the wish I’d made had been a little extreme, but there was nothing I could do about it now. Even if I wanted to undo it, I wasn’t sure how.
“I guess she’s blowing me off.” Cassa huffed. “I don’t get it. We’ve been having fun working on our time capsule project. And we have so much stuff in common.”
That last part stung, especially since it wasn’t true. Marina trekked all over the world, while Cassa and her mom never traveled because they couldn’t close down the antique store for too long. (And, of course, my family never went anywhere because we couldn’t risk being too far away from Austin’s doctors.) Besides, I was the one who’d known Cassa forever. I knew her better than anyone
!
But I clenched my teeth and said, “She’s probably busy or something.”
“Yeah,” Cassa said, but she sounded so sad. “I guess I was hoping this year would be different.”
I didn’t know why she’d gotten so obsessed with things changing. I wondered, suddenly, what she would have done with the wishing stones if she’d found them first. I shuddered to think what her Friendship wish might have been.
As we walked through the maze of residential streets behind the school, I was bursting to tell Cassa about the wishing stones, which were now safely tucked away in the back of my T-shirt drawer at home, but I kept my lips firmly shut. What if spilling the secret made the wish stop working?
Besides, what if she figured out that I’d also used the stones on her? I seriously doubted she’d be okay with that.
“How was the knitting club meeting?” I asked instead.
Cassa let out a soft laugh. “A disaster. I tried to make a square and it turned into a Swiss-cheese oval. I think I’ll try the journalism club instead.”
“Since when do you like to write?” The last time Cassa and I had worked on an English report together, I’d done most of the work.
“Well, it’s not my favorite,” Cassa admitted. “But who knows? It could be fun. My dad would be so excited if I told him I was going to be a writer too.”
“Your dad?” I repeated in surprise. “I didn’t know you even talked to him.” After her parents split up, Cassa’s dad had moved to the other side of the country to teach writing at some fancy college. I couldn’t remember the last time she’d even mentioned him.
She shrugged. “Yeah, he’s been calling every once in a while. He lives in England now, so he’s been telling me about some of the historical places he’s been researching for a new book.”
“Wow,” I said.
Secondhand Wishes Page 4