by Jeff Kitchen
Jake’s story checks out and he is let go.
Notice how much the detail has expanded. Think about the section in all these passes that describe Jake’s gun getting pointed at him in the gang house. The first pass for the overall script pass doesn’t even mention the gun because it’s too small a detail. It says: Smiley and his crew jump Jake and are about to kill him. In the Act III section it gets expanded to: The gang members cajole Jake’s gun away from him and take his ammo clip. Then in the section we just looked at, it has become three separate causes: (1) The guys goof around and get Jake off guard, (2) The gang cajoles Jake’s gun away from him and Smiley takes the ammo clip out, (3) One guy points Jake’s gun at him, and Jake says he’s got to leave.
Look at how the Proposition, Plot conflict map perfectly represents what happens in this sequence. It’s the classic shoving match that turns into a knock-down, drag-out fight. Notice how the Initial Act of Aggression is the guys tricking Jake into handing over his gun. Jake clearly precipitates the fight to the finish when he jumps Smiley. He’s going for the knock-out punch and everybody in the audience came up on the edge of their seat, wondering if he can somehow make it out of that room.
Sequence, Proposition, Plot for Act III, Sequence 2, Scene 3 of Training Day
It’s crucial that each scene works dramatically because the scenes are the only part of the film the audience is truly aware of. Remember the Michelin Tires commercial explaining how that little square of rubber is the only contact your car actually has with the road, so you should buy the best tires available? Well, the scene is the only part of the movie that the audience actually interacts with. Movies basically consist of one scene after another, and the audience is not saying, “Wow, did you check out the second act structure?” They don’t see the underlying deep composition, any more than you see the steel girders inside a finished skyscraper.
Look at how detailed this reverse cause and effect becomes. You can practically hear the dialog. Try reading from the bottom up, and see how well the action flows.
Object: Jake walks off with the money and leaves Alonzo powerless.
Final Effect: Alonzo rages at the locals, but he’s got no power anymore.
Immediate Cause: Jake walks off with the money as Alonzo yells at him.
Cause: One of the locals picks up a gun and covers Jake so he can leave.
Cause: Jake rips Alonzo’s badge off and says he doesn’t deserve it.
Cause: Alonzo says he wants to go home, and Jake lowers his gun.
Cause: Jake says he’s taking the money as evidence and asks Alonzo if he wants to go to jail or go home.
Cause: Alonzo freaks out at Jake, raging that he
has to have that money.
Cause: Jake will not back down—he’s taking the money from Alonzo as evidence that he robbed and murdered Roger.
Cause: Alonzo’s mind is blown that Jake shot him in the ass, and he shows real fear.
Cause: Jake shoots Alonzo.
Cause: Alonzo goes for the gun.
Cause: Alonzo says Jake doesn’t have the balls to shoot a cop in the back, and he threatens to grab the gun.
Cause: One of the locals puts a gun down near Alonzo.
Cause: Alonzo offers to make anyone rich who puts a bullet in Jake’s head.
Cause: Jake points a gun at Alonzo.
Cause: Jake slugs Alonzo and takes the money.
Cause: Alonzo slams the car around trying to get Jake off, and gets stunned.
Cause: Jake drops on the car’s hood as Alonzo drives off with the money.
Now let’s look at the structure of the conflict for this scene:
Protagonist
Antagonist
Initial Act of Aggression
Alonzo says he’ll make anybody rich who puts a bullet in Jake’s head.
Justified Retaliation
Jake says the locals are not like Alonzo, just as he’s learned that he’s not like him.
Aggravation of the Issue
Alonzo challenges Jake, saying that he doesn’t have the balls to shoot a cop. he says Jake will get the gas chamber and then he goes for the gun.
Precipitating Act
Jake shoots Alonzo in the ass.
Central Dramatic Question
Will Jake stop Alonzo, or will Alonzo somehow still pull this off?
Alonzo rages at Jake to give him the money.
Jake takes Alonzo’s badge, saying he doesn’t deserve it. Jake gets back-up from two locals, who let him leave.
Alonzo screams at Jake to stop and tries to power trip the locals.
Jake walks off, getting out with the money as evidence.
Again, notice the proportion. Late in the scene when Jake shoots Alonzo in the ass, it touches off a fight to the finish within the scene itself. There’s so much detail at the scene level that we’re paraphrasing the dialog. Writing a scene is simple with this kind of in-depth structural map to work from.
You’ll see a lot of Sequence, Proposition, Plot in Part Two of this book as I develop and construct an original screenplay. I’ll guide you through my entire thought process as I wrestle the story into shape, doing exactly what we just did here—but I’ll be building a plot, not just analyzing one. I’ll take Sequence, Proposition, Plot all the way from the overall story level down to the scene level—and then I’ll write the actual scenes. I want you to get as much practical working experience as possible with this master tool so that you can use it properly, and consistently make your scripts work.
A Quick Review of What We’ve Done with Training Day
Let’s get an overview of what we’ve done applying Sequence, Proposition, Plot to Training Day. The following diagrams showing our work from this chapter, printed small and basically unreadable, are intended for instructional purposes. Bear in mind that for simplicity, they only show the first page of the reverse cause and effect (see expanded versions earlier in this chapter). First, we see the whole script on the left and Act III on the right:
Whole Script
Act III
Next we have Act III, Sequence 1 on the left, and Act III, Sequence 2, Scene 3 on the right:
Act III, Sequence 1
Act III, Sequence 2, Scene 3
These diagrams should help you see the big picture and give you a better grasp of what we’ve just done.
CONSTRUCTING A STORY WITH SEQUENCE, PROPOSITION, PLOT
Rather than analyzing an existing plot as we’ve just done, in most instances you’ll be using Sequence, Proposition, Plot to construct a plot for your own screenplay. To demonstrate this I’ve prepared the following example: Imagine that we’re writing a script in one section of which our protagonist, a thief, must ditch a crooked detective who’s so hot on his trail that he can’t do business. In laying out reverse cause and effect for the whole script, it would take only one line to say that the thief gets rid of the detective by framing him. It’s simple and presented with no detail, which is the proper way to treat it on the first pass. In going over the material again at the act level, however, we would create more detail, adding that the thief pretends to make a huge score using counterfeit money, knowing that the detective is watching. When the detective swoops in and relieves the thief of the cash, he’s promptly busted for the counterfeit money by the Secret Service, who the thief had tipped off—so the detective is now out of the way.
Reverse Cause and Effect for a Sequence
Now let’s outline Sequence, Proposition, Plot for the actual sequence in which our thief frames the detective. This sequence is just one unit of the act, and the frame-up is just one key action in the entire plot, but our job is to make it function as a gripping, actable segment of the script. So we’re going to flesh out the framing of this crooked detective. To do so, must think through the particulars of how it would happen in more detail. This raises a lot of questions. How does the thief get the counterfeit money? Why wouldn’t the detective suspect anything? Where would the f
ake robbery take place? How does the thief get word to the Secret Service that this detective will have the funny money? How does the thief make sure that the charges will really stick? What’s to prevent the detective from saying the counterfeit money was part of an investigation? There are many other potential questions and pitfalls to be addressed by firming up the details. These may even be notes to yourself to inform your writing, not actual details that make it into the script. We want to keep it simple, unencumbered, and clear. Remember, this is for just one sequence within one act, and we’ll already be dealing with a fair amount of detail. Let’s call the thief Mitchell and the detective, Kepler.
What’s the Object of the sequence? Mitchell gets Kepler arrested and sent to jail, freeing him to pursue his line of work.
What’s the Final Effect that demonstrates the Object on-screen with real actors? Secret Service agents arrest Kepler for possession of counterfeit money, and then find hidden in his house the plates for the fake bills, which Mitchell had planted to make the charges stick.
What’s the Immediate Cause of the Secret Service arresting Kepler? The Secret Service picks Kepler up and finds the phony money on him.
What’s the cause of the Secret Service finding the money on him? Kepler grabs Mitchell after the heist and takes all the money.
What’s the cause of Kepler grabbing Mitchell? Mitchell comes out of a mansion loaded with cash, and Kepler is waiting in ambush.
What’s the cause of Mitchell coming out of the mansion with the money? Mitchell pulls off a fake robbery.
What’s the cause of Mitchell doing the robbery? Mitchell gets word to the Secret Service that Kepler has bogus money.
What’s the cause of Mitchell alerting the Secret Service? Mitchell acquires the counterfeit money.
What’s the cause of Mitchell getting the counterfeit money? Mitchell goes to a counterfeiter seeking help to get rid of the corrupt detective, and convinces her to let him use her phony bills for the job.
What’s the cause of Mitchell going to the counterfeiter? Kepler tells Mitchell that he wants a cut of the action or there’ll be no getting rid of him, and Mitchell won’t be able to commit any more robberies.
See how we’ve expanded upon the detail by thinking it through one more time? We’ve answered some questions and raised still more, which we’ll answer when we use Sequence, Proposition, Plot at the scene level.
Developing the Proposition and Plot for a Sequence
Now we move on to Proposition and Plot. When working with this tool, look at the conflict you’ve already got as well as what you’re missing, and then build from there. At this point some of the elements don’t exist yet, and that’s okay. Remember, here we’re actually creating the conflict. Or more specifically, we’re mapping out the opposition that we’ve imagined so far, seeing where the gaps are, and then filling in those gaps, thereby fleshing out the full conflict. This is different from the analytical work we were doing with Training Day—here, it’s a work in progress. We’re building a plot using this tool.
Protagonist
Antagonist
Initial Act of Aggression
Kepler tells Mitchell to cut him in on the action or he’ll stop him from committing any more heists.
Justified Retaliation
Mitchell tells Kepler that he won’t go along. He then acquires some counterfeit money and sets a plan in motion to take Kepler down.
Aggravation of the Issue
(No action here by Kepler yet that advances the conflict.)
Precipitating Act
(No action here by Mitchell that touches off the fight to the finish.)
Central Dramatic Question
(Question is unknown at this point.)
(No action here by Kepler yet.)
Mitchell commits the fake robbery.
Kepler grabs Mitchell and takes the money.
Mitchell signals the Secret Service agents, who capture Kepler with all the counterfeit money as well as the plates planted by Mitchell.
An X-Ray of the Action
By mapping out the conflict as it stands so far, we’ve discovered that Kepler is not all that proactive as of yet, and that Mitchell takes no action to start the fight to the finish. Like an x-ray, Proposition gets beneath the doughy flesh of narrative to the script’s skeleton form. It shows us what actions we’ve already got in terms of conflict, as well as what we’re missing. It also indirectly suggests possibilities for key actions in order to create conflict. While we’ve set up the potential fight, the script is still lacking when it comes to touching off the fight to the finish. Time to get creative.
First, we’re looking to give Kepler an Aggravation of the Issue—an action that aggravates the situation—so let’s have him beat up Mitchell when he says he’s not going to play along. Now we’re propelling the conflict forward while keeping audience sympathy for our protagonist. But we also want to create a Precipitating Act—an action by Mitchell that touches off the fight to the finish. It should be a strong attack, something with a chance to finish off the antagonist. One route would be for Mitchell to hook up a chain from the rear axle of Kepler’s car to a tree. Then, when Mitchell speeds off in his car and Kepler races after him, the rear axle would rip out. That’s a fitting choice: Mitchell actually wants Kepler to catch him with the counterfeit money, and this should send Kepler charging to intercept the fake robbery. This gives rise to a more intriguing Central Dramatic Question, because we’re supposed to want Kepler to catch him, but we’re also enjoying watching Mitchell yank his chain (so to speak). The question might be something like, “Will Mitchell pull off his deception or will Kepler not to fall for it?”
Next we need an action by the detective in response to this attack—the act that constitutes the first step in Plot for this sequence—and we’ve got it. Wouldn’t he come flying after Mitchell in a rage and catch up in time to see the supposed robbery? That sounds right. So now we’ve added all the elements suggested by this tool, which has helped flesh out the conflict and dramatize this sequence. Sequence makes it tight, while Proposition and Plot make it dramatic. On the next page, let’s map out what we’ve built, tested, thought through, and revised:
Protagonist
Antagonist
Initial Act of Aggression
Kepler tells Mitchell to cut him in on the action or he’ll stop Mitchell from committing any more heists.
Justified Retaliation
Mitchell tells Kepler that he won’t go along. He then acquires some counterfeit money and sets a plan in motion to take Kepler down.
Aggravation of the Issue
Kepler beats up Mitchell, warning him to get used to his new partner in crime.
Precipitating Act
Mitchell chains Kepler’s car to a tree and races off, causing Kepler’s axle to rip out when he follows at high speed.
Central Dramatic Question
Will Mitchell pull off his deception, or will Kepler not fall for it?
Kepler commandeers a car and races after Mitchell, arriving in time to see where he commits the “robbery.”
Mitchell commites the
fake robbery.
Kepler grabs Mitchell and takes the money.
Mitchell signals the Secret Service agents, who capture Kepler with all the counterfeit money as well as the plates planted by Mitchell.
This chart gives us a good look at the real process of building portions of a script using Sequence, Proposition, Plot. We’ve filled in the gaps so this sequence works dramatically, and these details flesh out more and more of our script.
Creating a Scene with Sequence, Proposition, Plot
Now let’s divide our sequence into scenes and apply Sequence, Proposition, Plot to develop a scene. First, review the reverse cause and effect we already generated and look for natural divisions. It appears that four scenes occur in this sequence: (1) Kepler tells Mitchell that he wants a cut, (2) Mitchell convinces the
counterfeiter to provide the fake money, (3) Mitchell commits the fake robbery and Kepler grabs the money, and (4) The Secret Service agents arrest Kepler and search his house. We’ll explore Sequence, Proposition, Plot for Scene 2.
Because we’re working at scene level, we’re looking to add final detail—a level of detail that will allow us to write the scene directly after structuring it. To start with, who is this counterfeiter? Why not make her a female? Let’s call her Melika. Are she and Mitchell old friends? Enemies? Mitchell could steal the bad bills from Melika, but a conversation between them could be more interesting, giving us a look at Mitchell using whatever charm, muscle, brains, or chutzpah he’s got to work his friend or enemy or ally. Exactly how much money are we talking about? How convincing are the bills? Will Detective Kepler suspect their legitimacy? Why would Melika fork them over? Is Mitchell buying them? Begging for them? Trading for them? Does Melika need to get rid of the bills? Are they too hot to move? Is the market saturated with them? Is the law after Melika? Does this fake heist put her at risk? Does it divert suspicion away from her? Is there any kind of sexual tension between Mitchell and Melika? Do they have a history as lovers? What’s in it for her? Is he blackmailing her?
These and many more questions naturally arise while we think this scene through. We must figure out what we want the scene to look like. We need entertainment value, and we need the scene to achieve its Object (see below), but beyond that we can go in many possible directions—as long as the scene is not boring. We must create Dramatic Action so that we’re not just presenting information. It has to be actable, and it should reveal more of what Mitchell is made of, how he thinks, and how he works. If this is a thriller, then should we stay with that tone or use this scene as a breather, as comic relief? These decisions are all part of the process.