“What happened to the two of you?” I asked while walking forward to Aubry, trying to touch the side of her bruised face.
She flinched away from me with a sneer, making me frown.
“She knocked me out!” Tommy exclaimed with a laugh! “She beat the shit out of me!”
I looked at Aubry wide-eyed and then laughed at Tommy’s reaction. It was funny because no one else would be happy to get knocked-out like Tom was.
“It was so freaking awesome!” Tommy said excitedly.
“Sofia, you may leave. Just take it easy for a few days. Your back will be sore from the tension, but you’ll be fine,” I called behind me without even tearing my gaze away from Aubry, who wouldn’t even look at me.
Sofia pushed through us all with a sneer to Aubry.
I took Tommy’s weight off of Aubry’s small frame and sat him down, cleaning the blood that was dripping from his nose, eyebrows, and lips. We spoke about her technique, and he gushed about her high-kicks, telling me that she knocked him out by kicking him in the face.
I laughed heartily at that. I was so proud.
However, she had yet to say a word.
By the time I finally got Tommy’s face to quit bleeding, I was over-the-top nervous about what Aubry was thinking about what happened between Sofia and me. I knew it looked bad, and I just hoped that she gave me a chance. I didn’t deserve one though.
“Good luck, dude . . .” Tom said as he left the training room quickly, closing the door behind him.
I swallowed thickly as I turned around to face Aubry. I had no idea what to say as I approached her slowly. I stared at her as she stared at the ground, wearing a frown.
“He got your cheek good,” I said softly as I wiped some dried blood off of her darkly bruised and cut cheek.
She pulled away from me with a huff as her crossed arms created distance between us.
“Are we just going to ignore it?”
“Ignore what?” I played dumb.
“So, you and Sofia, huh?” she spat out venomously. “I wish that I could say I was surprised,” she added more to herself.
I sucked in a deep breath at those words. They hurt, but they were true. I knew that trusting me around other girls was not an easy thing to do for anyone, much less Aubry, who already had severe trust issues.
“I know that you have no reason to believe me, but that was not what it seemed. She asked me to examine her back.”
“She had no shirt on, and her bra could barely even be considered such a thing.”
“I know. Look, she came in here trying to seduce me. I did not reciprocate and told her to leave if that was what she wanted from me because I was not interested,” I said while holding her eyes, trying to show her the honesty in them.
“You were touching her,” Aubry said softly with a pained voice, making me close my eyes in frustration at myself. “You know what? I guess it’s really none of my business. You can do whatever you want with whoever you want!” she said, brushing past me quickly going for the door.
“Hey, hey, hey . . .” I said, grabbing her arm before she turned the doorknob. “I only want one girl, Aubry. There is only one person on my mind constantly,” I said while loosely pinning her up against the door with my arms on both sides of her head.
She scowled at me with a look of disbelief.
“Sofia doesn’t interest me in the slightest. Aubry . . . she’s not you.”
She studied me for a long moment while trying to figure out if I was truly being honest with her.
I left my eyes unguarded as my hands found their way to the side of her neck and as I caressed her cheeks and jaws. I needed her to believe me. I didn’t want anyone else.
“Why?”
I looked at her in disbelief. “What do you mean ‘why’?”
“You could have anyone that you want.” She sighed. “She’s a beautiful girl. She could give you what you deserve and not have all the issues that I have.”
“I don’t want her,” I said harshly and tightened my grip on her arm just a little. “I only want you. You are the most beautiful girl to me. Scars, trust issues, and all . . . absolutely beautiful.”
She studied me for a long moment before she sighed in defeat and rested her head on my shoulder with no words.
“I’m sorry, I should’ve told Tom or B to deal with her because we all know how she is with me,” I said softly. “The last thing that I want to do is break what little trust you have given me. I know that I have a bad reputation and too many girls in my past. But Aub, I’d never do that to you. I have never felt the way that I feel for you with anyone else. No one can even come close, so please believe me when I say that nothing happened, nothing will ever happen, and I only want you. Please believe in me.”
She looked me in the eyes for a moment and nodded.
“I believe you,” she whispered.
I kissed the top of her head with a sigh of relief and hugged her. “Thank you.”
“Can we go and actually train now . . . no more interruptions?”
“Not so fast. Now it’s my turn,” I said with raised eyebrow and crossed my arms. “Who were those creepy guys?” I asked cautiously.
She took a sharp inhale of air and paused. “They were some guys that I used to know. They’ve pretty much always been a part of my life growing up. They were . . . friends . . . of my parents. Actually, the older one was one of the only people who used to help me and care about me after my mother died. He took pity on me and helped me when I needed it most. He just came to tell me happy birthday.”
I could tell that there was more to the story than that, but she had given me at least some of the story. For that, I was happy. I was happy that she was not completely freezing me out, even though, there was obviously a painful story behind her relationship with those two men.
“What about the younger one? I didn’t like the way he looked at you,” I found myself saying.
“Yeah . . . He was never as accommodating as his brother. He never really liked me. He likes to annoy me and throw insults at me. That was why he came . . . to bother me.”
“Sounds like a dick.”
She snorted and shook her head. “You have absolutely no idea.”
“You’re okay though, right? They didn’t do anything to you?”
“Aiden, I’m fine, truly. They just came to check on me. No harm was done, I promise.”
I nodded once and opened the door. “Well, okay then. Lets train.”
I accepted her answers for that moment, she just told me more than I thought she would, so I didn’t want to push my luck.
***
Fridays were not fun for me at the gym. When closing time hit, and everyone was getting ready to leave, no one would take a hint. No one would leave me alone, and they all tried to get me to go out with them. It was like that often.
The issue was on that particular Friday. Everyone was being even more persistent than usual. People were asking me over and over again, and I was getting annoyed. Not only because people were asking me to go out and not taking ‘no’ as an answer, but also because not a single person had even acknowledged Aubry. They certainly weren’t inviting her along with us. They were treating her as if she didn’t even exist.
“Come out with us tonight, Aiden. We can finish what we started in the trainer’s room,” Sofia said while smirking at me and biting her lip.
I rolled my eyes at the girl and scooted closer to Aubry, who was sitting on the bench in front of my locker, tying her shoes on while waiting for me to go home.
“Finish what? Me rejecting you. We don’t have to go out for that. The answer is. and always will be ‘no’.”
Sofia scoffed, but went away with minimal arguments to lick her wounds.
Aubry and I both laughed at the girl’s dramatics, but soon enough she looked up at me thoughtfully.
“Aiden, if you want to go out any of these people who’ve been inviting you, then go for it. I can manage by myself. I don’t want to h
inder you from having fun.”
“Aubry, I would have no fun without you,” I said, looking into her beautiful eyes. They were my favorite sight to see—forest green with gold flecks and fire . . . absolutely stunning.
“Besides, I need my rest for tomorrow,” I added nonchalantly.
“Aiden, I’ve seen you fight. Whoever you go up against tomorrow will not win, rested or not.”
“No, no, I’m not talking about the fight. I’m talking about tomorrow, during the day.” I smirked at her, hoping that she caught my drift.
“What?” she asked confused with her eyebrows furrowed. “What are you doing tomorrow?”
She was completely oblivious.
“Correction, what are ‘we’ doing.”
“Aiden, I don’t understand. What are we doing then?” she asked with a cute expression on her face.
“It’s a surprise, my little Aubry,” I teased.
She rolled her eyes exasperatedly, still not comprehending.
Chapter Thirty-Five
The Best Birthday
Aubry
It was twelve in the morning, and I felt like I was dying. My breathing was ragged, little dots clouded my vision, and my head was pounding along with my unusually fast pulse. My heart felt like it was going to explode if kept up like that. My stomach churned uneasily, yet I couldn’t throw up.
The feeling was nothing new, those feelings had plagued me every day for three months straight after Kelsey had left. Granted, at that moment, it was far more intense than any of those times.
I closed my eyes, trying to focus on making the nightmare go away, but it immediately made a reappearance in my mind. I was there surrounded by every single bad thing in my life—my father, Sunny, Daniel, James, Demetri, those men who laid hands on me as an adolescent, the football players from school, plus many more nameless faces from my past.
It wasn’t only people either. There were piles and piles of drugs, money, guns, and blood that were sitting around us all taunting me. It all surrounded me and made me feel enclosed and trapped. I was so terrified.
Then I saw him. He walked up painfully slow and joined the circle of the bad things in my life that surrounded me. They looked so alike—the black hair, the same built, and the same nose. However, he was so different from his son.
“Don’t think you could forget me that easily,” he spoke menacingly, and I instantly started crying. “You’re going to kill him, just like me. You’re going to tear him apart and make him bleed out slowly. Everything you touch, dies in the end, little girl.”
My sobs we’re so loud, but no one else was in sight. I was there alone with all my demons, and I was suffocating.
“You’re not the only one who knows what you did. Remember that,” Daniel and Demetri said in unison, making me fall to my knees.
Suddenly, everything in dream began advancing on me. It was all going to swallow me up whole.
I immediately opened my eyes and silent tears began falling down my face once again. Thinking about that did nothing to slow my fast beating heart or dot-filled-vision. My stomach began churning, and I was going to throw up.
I sat up quickly and more black dots filled my line of sight. I felt like I was going to die. I was hyperventilating, and it was out of control.
Not knowing what I was doing, I got up and began walking. I couldn’t see where I was going, and I had no idea what I was doing. I just walked with no destination in sight, letting my legs take me to wherever I was going to die at.
After walking for what seemed like miles, which I was sure was only a few feet, I collapsed on the ground in a heap and just laid there.
That was it, my death place. I was done.
“Aubry?” I heard him say in panic. “Aubry!?” I heard again with even more dread laced in his voice.
“Aiden . . .” It came out as a whisper.
That was where I went . . . to Aiden.
My guilt was astronomical at that point as the voice popped into my head, reminding me of the words from my dream . . .
I was going to kill him. Nothing good survived around me. I thought about it intently and that only made my heart rate speed up.
I was a plague. Actually worse; I was an asteroid set on wiping everyone around me out. He needed to get away from me. Everyone needed to stay away from me. I needed to get them all away from me before it was too late!
However, I was selfish. I couldn’t let them go. I couldn’t let Aiden go. I needed to, but I couldn’t. I was too selfish.
“Aubry, are you hurt? Do I need to call my mom? Talk to me Aubry,” he said, putting his hand on my shoulder. It felt like fire, but I didn’t ever want his warmth to go away.
“Aubry . . .” His voice was full of anguish and concern.
I felt horrible for going in there—disturbing him from his sleep and inserting myself into his life to disrupt everything around. It was all a mistake. I was a mistake!
My breathing was speeding up. I was surely dying. I had to be. It was only a matter of seconds, and I’d be gone, no longer around to complicate everyone’s lives and hurt the people around me.
“Aubry.” I heard an angel’s voice next me.
I was blind, but I knew it was Aiden. Dying next to him would be okay. It meant that everything would be okay.
“Aubry, you’re having a panic attack. Listen to me . . .” I could feel his hand on my back, making slow circular motions. He pulled me to him and put my head on his shirtless chest, it felt so intimate.
“Listen to my heartbeat,” he said, putting my hand on his chest as well.
It was slightly more elevated than usual, but I focused intently on it.
Thump, thump, thump. It was strong and steady, just like him. He was swaying us softly and humming in my ear.
Thump, thump, thump.
My tears were slowing down as I clung to him tightly. It was so selfish, but I needed him. It was unhealthy, but he was the only thing that felt real to me.
A few more minutes passed and slowly, one by one, the dots began to fade.
A few more minutes, and my breathing and heart rate slowed down to almost a normal rate.
Even as I was finally calmed, he never let me go. He wouldn’t even budge, and continued to held me against him tightly.
I looked up at him, and he looked back at me with soft eyes.
“Aiden . . .” I said, though my voice was hoarse. “T-Thank you,” I whispered, turning my face into his chest and kissing where his heart was without thinking.
“I don’t deserve it,” I whispered so softly that I didn’t think he’d hear it.
He was too good for me. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes again with the realization that everyone was too good for me. I was nothing.
“Hey, look at me,” he told me softly while turning my face to his.
“You are strong. You are worthy of the whole world, Aubry. Don’t think less of yourself because you had a panic attack. Don’t let your mind sabotage you. You are amazing!” he said, boosting my confidence level slightly.
A long period of silence passed as he still held me without ever letting go.
“Aiden, you should get some rest,” I told him when I looked at his face and noticed the dark circles under his eyes.
“So, should you,” he finally agreed and let go of me with a small nod.
I felt cold when he dropped his arms from my body. I sighed, but took my cue to leave the room. My feet felt like I was walking on pins and needles as I limped towards the door uncomfortably. I already felt like crying once again.
He stayed, sitting in the middle of his bedroom floor where we both were, just staring at me. I wanted nothing else more than to sit back down there with him again as he held onto me. I wanted him to make me feel like he was never going to leave me.
However, I knew what the reality was. Unfortunately, reality always has a crappy way of popping back up and making itself known. It didn’t matter how crappy that said reality really was.
&nb
sp; “Where are you going?” he asked when he stood up as he looked at me like I was crazy.
I looked around the room and raised my eyebrows. I thought it was obvious . . .“The living room?”
He frowned at me and shook his head. “Will you please sleep in here . . . with me?” He gently pulled me with him towards the bed. “I . . . I need to know that you are truly okay.”
My eyes widened at him. “Aiden, I’m fine. Besides . . . What about your mom? I’m just going to be in the living room.”
Aiden shut the door in front of me and looked at me with skeptical eyes.
“Aubry, you’re not fine. You just had the worst panic attack that I’ve ever seen before just a few moments ago! You already look like you’re about to cry again! I honestly thought you were going to die for a split-second. Please, just let me help you. I need to know that you’re okay.” He sat down on the bed and rested his head in his hands. “I was so worried.”
I stared at him as he sat there, looking distraught.
“Don’t worry about my mom, Aub. She’ll understand. Please . . . Just come here?”
That was all the coaxing that I needed. I sat on the bed with him and stared at him, intently letting myself relax and unwind. He put an arm around me, and I laid my head on his shoulder as I finally let myself simply breathe.
“Thank you, Aiden,” I whispered into his neck.
“I thought you were dying . . .” he whispered into my hair with a shaky voice.
“Me too,” I whispered back solemnly.
He sighed and kissed the top of my head softly. He slowly laid down and pulled me with him. When we were both laying all the way down on the bed, he slid his arm around my waist and pulled me to him, cuddling me sweetly.
I breathed him in deeply and settled myself against him. I let myself relax even more as he held me.
As much as I knew that I needed to let him go, that was where I felt like I belonged . . . I felt like I belonged right there with him.
A few long moments passed, and I was getting very sleepy.
Aiden took a deep breath as hugged me tighter.
Fighting For Life Page 39