The old ladder creaked and squealed but stayed in one piece under Alex’s weight. I followed him up into the attic.
The attic was a small room. Except for an enormous chest sitting by the side wall and a metal bed, it was otherwise empty. The window had no glass. Two panels of wood met in the middle of the rectangular opening, closing it shut. Alex pushed them out, and the fresh air instantly flew in.
“It’s too dark to see it now, but you can see the sea from here,” Alex informed.
I looked out into the dark forest. “How can you possibly see anything through the jungle of trees?”
“You’ll be surprised. We are a lot closer to the water than you think. Shhh—listen! Can you hear it?”
I paused for a moment, forcing my hearing beyond the forest. “I do. It’s very soft—I hear the faint sound of waves washing on the shore.”
“Look! The lighthouse beacon.” He pointed out into the night. A light circled in the sky far in the distance, but a lot closer than I’d have guessed. “Hurst Castle’s lighthouse stands as a beacon for all wandering vessels.”
“My father brought Lucca and me to see it once when we were children. I hardly remember it though,” I softly said. I didn’t want to think about them. It was too painful.
Sensing my apprehension, Alex didn’t inquire further. “My family came here during hunting season. My grandfather built the cottage when my father was born. When my grandfather died, we stopped coming often.”
“It’s very peaceful.”
“It’s the perfect hide out.”
“Do you think there might be more German soldiers in the forest?”
“Not likely. They wouldn’t come down this far. It’s too close to Hurst Castle.”
“But, what if—” I started, but Alex interrupted me.
“Don’t worry, my lady. If there are more Germans around, I will send Thomas to fight them,” he joked.
“Very amusing, general.”
A distracting sound came from the forest below.
“They are ready,” Alex said. “I’ll take a few men with me down to the fortress. It might take a while. Besides checking on the status of the ship, I need to send a report to London relating the developments since we left Forte Radici.”
“Do you think there is a ship already here?”
“Not likely.”
“Are you going to send a message to your parents? I’m sure they’ve found out about the attack by now.”
“No, I can’t. My mission requires total discretion. I only exist to the army until our task is fulfilled. My parents know how it is. They’ll be fine.”
“Would you inquire about Forte Radici and my father?”
“I will.”
By the time Alex returned, the night had completely settled upon the forest. Though it hadn’t been too long—it had been long enough for me to make the place more habitable.
The lamp, which I found among a hidden pile of ancient artifacts in the main floor, became my best friend. Its light helped me to dust out the entire cottage, shake off the bedding that lay inside the chest upstairs, and organize our few possessions from the military bags we had brought.
“General Sterling is returning,” I heard a soldier loudly announce, followed by the sound of horses nearing the cottage. Moments later Alex walked in.
“Look what I got—we aren’t going to starve for sure.” Alex smiled. He placed the supplies he brought back from Hurst Castle on the spotless table and proceeded to unwrap a few packages of bread and some fruit. We sat down at the table to eat our first meal since our escape into the forest, but surprisingly I found it difficult to do so.
“You’ve been busy,” he observed, looking around.
“There was nothing else to do. And believe me, it’s a lot less frightful without the spider webs hovering over our heads.”
“My lady…” Alex took a deep breath, taking in the humble circumstances of the cottage. “This is very far from the way you are used to living. And definitely not the place I imagined spending a honeymoon…”
“Anyplace you are is the perfect place for me,” I answered. The look in Alex’s eyes had my cheeks flushing. I dropped my gaze to the piece of bread in my hands. “What about the ship?”
“There are no vessels at hand. They are working on it.”
The question I had been dying to ask and Alex had been dreading to answer found its way out. “Any news about Forte Radici?”
Alex’s expression turned serious now. “Very little…” His eyes held mine with a measure of compassion that worried me.
“Tell me, Alex, please.”
“All I know is that shortly after we left, the reinforcements arrived and ended the battle…” Alex hesitated to continue.
“What’s wrong? What happened to my father?”
“I’m sorry, Florence, but General Contini along with some other men are missing.”
“Missing? What do you mean missing?”
“They’ve been unable to locate him. Sometime last night they started to search the woods near the house for survivors.”
“They have to find him.” A rising desperation crept into my heart. “He could be wounded.”
“The fact that they haven’t found him is a good sign in itself. Your father is a strong man. He is well trained, and he’s come through worse scrapes. I’ll check again tomorrow.”
His words made sense, but my feelings didn’t understand them. “There must be something we can do.”
“The best thing we can do for him right now is to complete the mission he assigned us.”
“I know, but it’s so hard.” The uncertainty and fear would nudge at me, yet I would suppress it. I had no choice; like the night before dawn, I’d stay still.
“I know it is.” Alex moved his chair closer to mine and wrapped his arm around my shoulders, bringing me into his chest.
“If it cheers you up, you must know that the soldiers at the castle had a good laugh at me.”
“They did? Why?”
“Have you seen my face?” Alex raised an eyebrow. His face was considerably swollen. “They called me ugly.”
“How rude,” I retorted, then laughed.
The meal was soon gone and our conversation had died down. Alex extinguished the light from the lamp. With our thoughts and emotions racing in different directions, we ascended the ladder to the attic.
The night was warm and still, the only noise, the natural creaking of the old wooden structure. Coming to a stop in front of the open window, we contemplated each other with deep emotion. The moon’s light traveled across the treetops and into the room to touch our skin.
“I hope you will never regret the decision of marrying me,” said Alex.
“When I married you—it was the only time in my life when I knew exactly what I wanted.”
“I always want to be with you, Florence. I can’t imagine life without you,” he spoke softly, his cool lips tracing my cheek.
“I’m sorry about this,” I said, brushing my fingers on his injuries.
“My lady, just for a single moment like this, I would take the beating all over again.”
The unison sound of birds chirping high up in the trees called me back from a deep sleep. I knew it was day by the light touching my face, but I refused to open my eyes and let the peace I felt abandon me. Somehow being with Alex had removed from my heart, even if temporarily, all the evil things that had transpired. I stretched my arm out across the thin mattress searching for him—his spot was empty.
My daydreaming was interrupted by the outside sounds of busy soldiers, and restless horses. They attested that everything was very real. And with that solid reality, the undesirable parts of my story came back to life.
I was bombarded with the unchangeable, irrational, recent events: the battle at the manor, Colonel Swinger’s injury, the menacing Krause, the dead soldiers back in the forest, my father and Mrs. Allerton, the mission still ahead…
“No, Florence, not today,” I r
eprimanded myself. Consciously, I rejected the terrible memories. They wouldn’t interfere with the time I had with Alex, at least not for now.
“Florence, come down for breakfast,” Alex called from the bottom of the ladder.
“Only if you make me.” I smiled. He groaned as he climbed the ladder. I hid my face underneath the pillow, but it proved to be a bad idea. Alex tickled me until I started to suffocate with laughter.
“Are you coming now?”
“Not convinced yet.”
“My lady.” He faked a serious voice. “I think I’m starting to understand what poor Mrs. Allerton went through with you all these years.”
“She served me breakfast in bed,” I joked; he knew it wasn’t true.
“Well.” His beautiful eyes focused on me, considering what to do next. “I’ve already tried persuasion, so I’m left with one last resort—”
“And what’s that, general?”
“Force you to come down.” His strong arms swept me off the bed to swing me around in the air before letting my feet touch the floor.
“You know, general—if you want me to be obedient, all I require is a kiss.”
“Why didn’t you say that before!” He laughed and kissed me.
Breakfast would have to wait.
The afternoon sun shone brightly filling the forest with life. This was the first time since we left Forte Radici that I noticed the beauty of the New Forest. The many shades of green, full of vitality and moisture were refreshing. The trees didn’t seem so dark and clumped together anymore. They stood now like giant warriors to protect instead of harass us. And the wildlife that had been concealed from me was now everywhere.
“Hurry, Florence—come on!” Alex shouted back as he ran up ahead on the path to the sea. But accepting that my running ability was no match for his fast legs, I had given up trying to keep up with him. Seeing the vast blue sea and inhaling the sweet, moist air, was the propelling force that carried me to the edge of the water.
Alex had already dropped the bag off his shoulders onto the sand and was unlacing his heavy military boots. To my surprise, he removed his army pants and shirt and got into the water.
Apprehensive of the chilly water, I took off my shoes and let my feet test its temperature. I gasped at the touch of the water; it hit my skin like a million stabbing nails. It was brutally cold. The waves rolled back and forth onto the shore, pushing me back to the dry sand.
“Come on, Florence!” Alex insisted, challenging me to follow him into the sea.
“Are you mad?” The water was almost to his waist.
“Come on—come on!” he shouted. His voice lost in the sound of the waves.
“The water is freezing!” The thought of being cold and wet convinced me to stay dry.
“You’ll get used to it!” He submerged his whole body into the ocean.
I strolled away on the shore, letting my skin soak up the warm sun. The expansive fortress was fully visible. Its enormous armored wings sat majestically on the narrow strip of land stretching out into the sea, not too far from us.
Quick images, one after another, flashed in my mind of the day when my father brought Lucca and me here. Memory transported me back in time. I closed my eyes, looking up at the sun, my feet still moving. It had been so many years ago, yet I could see us so clearly, walking across the wide inner courtyard of the fortress.
I remembered the long, boring history lesson that my father provided for us on our journey across the New Forest. I remembered Lucca, proud to ride on his own horse.
Lucca had walked across the great Hurst Castle courtyard, dreaming of the day he would become a soldier, his face beaming with joy.
Alex’s wet arms encircled me from behind. “Where is my lady going?” I had wandered off without noticing, close to the fortress.
“You startled me!”
“Would you like to go inside?”
“No. Not today.”
“If you change your mind…”
“I won’t. And you, general, will catch a cold.” He was dripping wet.
“You sound like my mother!”
“I’m Mrs. Sterling, after all. Come on, let’s get you warm.”
“Let me dry off first, Mrs. Sterling.” Alex took my hand and broke into a run, pulling me along.
“You are insane! I can’t keep up!” I shouted.
“Is that so?” Before I knew what was happening, Alex slowed down, picked me up in his arms, and resumed his run. “How about now?”
“Much better!” I laughed wholeheartedly, amazed that he could run so fast with me in his arms.
“We’ve reached our destination, your highness,” Alex said, almost out of breath. He placed me down on the sand by his pile of clothes and our bag. “You are heavier than you look,” he teased.
“And you are stronger than you look, general.” Alex grinned at my words and quickly lay down on the sand, his eyes fixed on the sky. I sat by him, and unpacked our bag; a canteen, food, and a few other items that Alex had packed, all came out.
“Would you like an apple?”
“Not hungry,” Alex replied.
When I had taken the last bite of my apple, I realized that Alex was deep in thought. “What is on your mind?”
“Do you remember what the priest said?”
“The priest? When? During the wedding ceremony?”
“Yes. Do you remember?”
“Some of it—maybe—I’m not sure. I was too nervous. Why?”
“He said we would be together until death separates us.” It was difficult for Alex to express his feelings. “Truly, Florence, have you ever thought about what happens after death? Are we going to be together again? Or is this life the end? In the forest, I came too close to losing you. I can’t bear the thought of being without you.”
“I’d much rather believe that there is a life after death—that there is a God somewhere out there watching over us, giving us the gift of love. Love, I think, is the most powerful force in the world. It just has to last much longer than a lifetime.”
Alex remained silent. I looked into the red flaming sphere, almost gone behind the west skyline, and Mrs. Allerton’s words popped into my mind.
“Would you like to know what Mrs. Allerton said to me after my brother died?”
“What did she say?”
“She said that what really matters is the way we react to the trials of life. Difficulties come into our lives to shape us and make our character stronger. She said that in many ways we design our destiny through the things we do and believe during hard times. She said that there is more than we can see and feel right now. This life is just a temporary trip.” I smiled at the thought. She wasn’t here, yet I felt her influence ever so near.
“Florence, do you believe her?” Alex held my gaze, holding me accountable for my answer.
“Yes, I do. We have to hope, to have faith. Alex, promise me that no matter what happens in the future you’ll always hold on to hope. Promise me that you won’t do anything irrational if things don’t turn out the way we expect.” I held his gaze now, holding him accountable for his answer.
Alex considered my petition for a brief moment. “All right, my lady, if it makes you happy, I promise you. I won’t do anything irrational.”
“Very well, general. I’m pleased.”
“But just in case, we better use our time wisely.” He smiled mischievously. “I’d much rather enjoy you now that you are in a tangible form.”
“I agree.” I stole a quick kiss from him. “I’ll race you back to the cottage!” I ran towards the forest.
“Wait! What about all of this?” His eyes darted over the scattered items on the sand.
“That’s your problem, general. I need a head start!” He shook his head, watching me disappear at the edge of the trees.
“General Sterling, sir!” Thomas called from underneath the window. The sun had barely risen.
“Is he really calling for me…this early?” Alex yawned. He tur
ned onto his other side and fell back asleep.
“General Sterling! News, sir!” Thomas insisted, louder this time.
“This better be good, or I’ll shoot him.” Alex jumped out of the bed and quickly pulled his shirt on. I moaned, unable to shake off the sleep. The exhaustion had finally caught up to us.
Alex pushed open the wooden panels, eager to discover what was so important for Thomas to interrupt the otherwise peaceful morning.
“Captain Frankfort—what’s the rush?”
“The ship, sir, it has arrived.” His words awakened me completely. I perceived undesirable changes heading my way.
“I’ll be right down.”
“Yes, sir.”
Alex gazed out into the forest for a long while, something disrupting him.
“How soon do we have to leave?”
“Right away. We can’t delay our arrival in France any longer.” He managed to get his uniform on, his thoughts still very abstract.
“Should I start packing?”
“No…not yet. We’ll talk about it.”
We’ll talk about it? What was there to talk about? Alex hurried down the ladder to the front of the cottage.
Not wanting to intrude, I got dressed and waited in the attic until he returned.
“It’s a French navy ship.” Alex avoided looking at me. “Florence, only four of us will go.”
“Am I included among those four?”
“Florence, I’m sorry, but you can’t come.” His words cut deep into my heart. I was perplexed.
“You can’t be serious.” I reached for his arm and forced him to look at me. “You can’t be serious.”
“I’m sorry. Please don’t make this any harder for me than it already is.”
“Hard for you? You’re not the one being abandoned.”
“Listen, Florence.” His voice was unable to hide the increasing frustration in him. I sank on the bed and hid my face between my hands. “I wouldn’t ask you to do this if it wasn’t the best for you.” He sat next to me, his hands clenched.
A knot formed in my throat which prevented me from speaking. How could he leave me?
“Why didn’t you tell me this from the beginning? At least I could’ve gotten used to the idea by now.”
Awaken, Shadows of a Forgotten Past Page 30