by GG Anderson
Moe laughed, “I came from a pretty small school, we had about 800 in my class.” He smiled a cocky grin. “That’s small right?”
“Not at all.”
He shrugged, “Well, it felt small. I swear but the time senior year hit, I had dated all the girl’s worth dating.”
“So maybe the school wasn’t small, just the person.” I took a sip, shocked that the words tumbled out.
“What?” apparently, Moe hadn’t heard.
I shook my head, “Oh nothing, tell me more about you?” That did it. He dove into sports stories, and weekend debauchery memories of the boys at home, and all the crazy stuff they did. Honestly, none of it sounded plausible, but I added the correct eyebrow interaction, ohh’s, and no ways to make him keep going.
Obviously, this date with Moe would be over soon and never be repeated. My mind started to drift.
Tyler was so much easier to talk to. Well, Tyler used to be so easy to talk to. Used to be so fun to hang with. Moe was definitely not Tyler.
I had finished my coffee and had already returned the cup back to the dish holder, as I waited for Moe’s latest story to wrap up.
He looked down at my interlaced fingers. Slowly he reached out to touch them. “Hey, you wanna go for a walk? This downtown area is really nice.”
Instinctually, I pulled my hands from the table and tucked them under each leg. “No, I think I should get back, I have a ton of homework to get through.”
"Ok, if that is what you want.” Moe’s expression fell, and he leaned back in his chair acting as if another glory story was going to start.
“It is.” I popped up from the chair and grabbed his empty coffee cup. “It really is.” I set the cup back in the dish return and walked quickly back to the table. I didn’t sit back down, but stood next to it, waiting for Moe to stand up.
He got the hint, and slowly stood grabbing his jacket. I didn’t check to see if he had followed me but when I reached the truck door, I saw him slowly crossing the street. Yeah, this didn’t go like he’d hoped.
We drove back to campus relatively silent. I turned the truck radio up when a hint of a song I sort of recognized sang through the speakers. Then that was it. We were back at campus.
We shut the doors of the truck and began walking towards my dorm. “Don’t you live in Simplot?” I asked as he continued toward my dorm.
“Yeah, I just wanted to make sure you made it back ok.” He looked down, a little stricken.
“Oh, thank you.” There was no need to be rude, he had gotten the message that I wasn’t interested. Let him at least have some dignity left.
We approached the doors and he started to lean in, so I awkwardly turned it into a hug. “Thanks Moe, this was-good.” What was I supposed to say? “I’d never been there before.” My smile hung thinly on my face, as I back stepped to get to my door. Unfortunately, I stepped right into someone, I turned to apologize. “I am so sorry,” I added, as I turned to face them.
Of course. It was Tyler.
His eyes went from Moe to me, and his expression hardened for just a second. Then he quickly hid it in his smile. “Here let me get the door for you guys.” He stood on the side opening it wide.
I looked at Moe and then to Tyler, “Nope, just me,” I walked through, “Thanks again Moe,” I waved as I continued down the hall.
I rounded the corner glad to be away from the testosterone. My head's dull ache echoed in my ears. I didn’t want to think. Thinking would cause me to get a bigger headache, bottom line, I was not open to this.
Sleep didn’t quite touch my mind, as I lay captured in the space between deep sleep and reality, the small sliver of vortex that existed when my subconscious couldn’t quite let go completely, and when the mysteries of my imagination peeked around the corner, just barely visible.
Crystel’s alarm went off and pulled me back to reality.
I turned over chewing through the remnants of dreams that hadn’t escaped the clutch of my fingers of consciousness.
An image from the corner caught my attention. It seemed important.
The image felt male, and menacing.
But somehow, familiar.
The door shut, and I lost the tiny grip of the dreams.
I shuffled out of bed and down the hall for a shower, still trying to extract the images from the faded dreams. As I rinsed the shampoo, nothing came back to me. Just little shards of memories, but nothing that was real or tangible. I couldn’t quite tell why it mattered. Why my brain was trying so hard to push the recovery of this image.
That was the most troubling piece of this puzzle. The menacing ache in my stomach. The driving force to remember who or what this image was. Why did it matter, and furthermore, why could I not quite grab it?
The week continued and the dreams played on repeat in my mind. Each morning I woke with frustration and annoyance as I couldn’t quite get the picture to form.
Every morning it continued in the shower, with my brain feeling on edge. It was as if it watched me from the folds of my subconscious, taunting me.
What was so important that it continued to haunt me?
“Hey, can we talk for a minute?” Tyler’s voice broke through my continued fog.
I turned meeting his eyes, completely forgetting how to breathe. “Um, yeah.”
His eyes darted around the room, “In private? It is really important, Savanah.”
My spine rolled with emotions. He hadn’t said my name in that tone for a while, and the sound made my knees rubbery. Unable to form words, I motioned him to lead the way, as if I needed a map to where we were going.
He walked to the Auditorium, holding the door wide while I walked under his arm to go in. Sure, I could have walked around, but at that moment, I couldn’t resist the emotional high I would get just being that close to him.
Silly, I know, but his nearness was irresistible. It made no sense, his tone was serious, his body language announced he was all business, but the 13-year-old girl inside of me couldn’t resist brushing ever so lightly against him.
We walked silently to the basement, sitting in our usual spots, facing each other.
His hat came off, and I could see the beads of sweat around his ears as he hung his head and looked at the floor. His knees supported his arms, and he heaved his chest up, as is finally digging in enough to get the strength to talk to me.
“Look, I know you don’t want to help me. I know somehow, I made you mad, or pissed you off, or whatever,” his eyes met my confused expression. “Hell, I don’t even know if you are for real, but if you are, I seriously need your help.”
“Of course,” my words barely broke the sound plane. “What can I do?” His obvious stress made me want to consciously reach over to him and touch his knee, comforting him.
His head shook, his nostrils flared. “Really?” The veins in his hands strained against his obvious anger. “Never mind. This was stupid.”
Flip-
My mind clicked and anger boiled in my own brain, “Wait, what are you talking about?” I stood, “You don’t get to ask to talk, and then just get pissed when I ask what I can do? What the hell, Tyler? I didn’t do anything. I am not pissed at you; I am not some crazy girl who is following you. I shared a huge secret with you-and secret I have never shared with anyone by the way, and you get all weird, so I give you space. THEN you go off about needing my help and get mad when I tell you because of my concussion my gift isn’t there anymore, and instead of being slightly sorry, or asking how I was doing with it, you get pissed and just leave-stop talking to me, and act like I did something wrong.” I stood silent for a moment and flopped back down on the sofa, “So no Tyler-you don’t get to say really-because, well—really back at you!” My sentence didn’t even make sense, but I was done. As much as I liked him, as attracted to him as I was, the switch between being meek and allowing him to be angry at me for no reason was over.
“It’s because of your concussion?”
“What?”
&n
bsp; He cocked his head and looked sideways at me, not fair, not at all fair. “That’s really why your thing isn’t working?”
I shrugged my shoulders, suddenly tired, “I don’t know, I guess so. I can’t figure out why else it’s gone. Whatever was wrong with my brain must have been knocked back into the proper place by the fall,” I leaned back on the sofa, “Nothing has happened since I left the emergency room. I have tried, but obviously I am just officially broken,” I laughed slightly, “Or not broken anymore. Something like that. I don’t know, but I do know it is gone.” My eyes focused on the floor. I had just admitted defeat. I had just verbally admitted that my gift was gone.
Although I had grieved some at home over the break, I had not said it out loud.
“How are you doing with that?” Tyler’s feet moved, and he sat next to me, reaching tentatively for my shoulder, but settled his hand on the back of the sofa.
I shrugged, “I always wanted to be normal, I guess I got my wish.” My eyes couldn’t leave the floor. I knew if I looked up, I wouldn’t be able to see him through the tears that were threatening to sneak out.
His hand gently touched my shoulder, and I felt the first tear escape, rolling down my cheek and landing flamboyantly on my jeans.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t really think about it that way. I just,” He shook his head and exhaled, “Oh I was too focused on my own stuff to even consider what was happening with you.” His arm moved up and down on my back, landing on my shoulder again, squeezing slightly. “You don’t seem to be ok with it being gone.”
I shook my head; his touch was piercing my soul. Too much. Tears, emotions, attraction, annoyance, frustration, all bubbling out.
“Tell me. I’m sorry I wasn’t there before, I really am. I was being an ass.” He pulled his hand in tighter on my shoulder, pulling me in to his chest.
And the gates were opened.
The tears crested my eyes as if they had been held back for years. They flowed not in drops but in rivers, cutting their own path down my cheeks on to his shirt. My shoulders shook slightly, and he just held me in his strong arms, rubbing my back gently.
My hair felt his fingers slowly petting me and it forced the other dam in my eyes to break loose.
I didn’t even know what I was crying for, only that obviously I needed it.
Finally, it slowed. I wiped my sopping wet cheek and for the first time assessed the damage my tears had done to his shirt. It was soaked. I might as well of tossed a soda on him with how wet he was.
I sat up slowly, not wanting to leave his arms. “I’m sorry.”
“No, I’m sorry. I should have,” He paused and reached for my chin.
Before I knew what was happening his lips were pressed against mine. Slowly, but with a fire just under the surface. It was that fire that melted the ice of my resolve. I had never been kissed before, and the small part of me that feared I wouldn’t have any idea how to do it, dissolved away into the soft electric heat that radiated off him.
His fingers found my hair again, and mine instinctively found the back of his neck, reveling in the feel of the soft little brown curls. My other hand slid up his chest, pausing on the wet t-shirt that clung to his pectoral muscles just perfectly. My fingers joined my other hand as his lips left mine, to trail down my throat. My eyes opened slightly, inhaling, trying to breathe.
“Ohhh!” My hands froze and my word broke the magic of the storybook moment. Tyler pulled back, and with it, he broke out connection.
“I’m sorry, I guess I,” his face was flushed, but I didn’t let him finish.
“No, Tyler that was wonderful. No, I,” I looked to the empty hallway again, “Tyler, I just saw your grandpa.”
Chapter Thirteen
Tyler looked behind him. “Wait, are you serious?”
My eyes sparkled; my breathing hitched as my emotions were racing around like a firefly in a jar. “Yes, I opened my eyes, and he was looking at us.”
Tyler blushed deeper, “Oh that’s a bit creepy.”
“No, Tyler that is the first time I have seen anything.” I reached for him. “Come here.”
His lip curled in that little smirk, his dimples flashed, the whole look I couldn’t resist. “Well, if you insist.”
He leans in to kiss me and I dodge him, “No be serious for a minute. I mean just for a minute.” I blushed deeply. My hand went for his shoulder again, and he dodged this time.
“Wait, is this ok? I mean are you healed enough, or are you going to pass out on me.”
I pulled back. “You’re right. Hang on,” I took a deep breath. I centered my soul, which with the flying emotions took more energy than usually. I breathed slowly, calming myself and then placed both feet on the concrete floor. I inhaled and exhaled, trying to slow everything down. Slowly, I reached for Tyler’s shoulder again and opened my eyes.
His eager expression was the only thing that I could see. I squinted my eyes, trying to focus harder, wondering if I could will him into view.
My head started to ache almost immediately.
I dropped my hand. “It isn’t working,” I felt my shoulders fall. “I promise he was there; I wasn’t lying.”
His eyes squinted. “Of course, you weren’t. I believe you.” He smiled.
“What?” my cheeks were flaming red.
He bumped my shoulder. “So, my kiss is so powerful it brought back your gift.” His cocky grin spread across his face.
My blush deepened, “I am sure that is what it was. Or it could be that I am still just a freak, but now I have a short. You know like a bad lamp.”
He took my hand, his fingers felt electric on my skin. “I think you are a perfect lamp,” he wove his fingers through mine. “So, you ok with this?”
I smiled, nodding, “Yeah are you?”
“Very,” he looked down, studying our fingers. “I’m sorry I wasn’t paying attention to how you felt. I honestly have been so consumed with my family stuff that I didn’t even think.”
I didn’t meet his eyes. “It’s ok. It really isn’t that big of a deal.” Ugh, discounting myself, I knew I wasn’t supposed to do that, but it was impossible to not think I had over reacted.
“It really is,” he shook his head. “Mom would kick my ass.”
What an odd time to bring up his mother.
He leaned back on the sofa. “So, can I tell you what is going on?”
I met his eyes and nodded, losing my ability to speak again. “Gramps left the ranch to my parents. My dad has a brother who helps them with things, but bottom line, it is my parents’ ranch. Mom’s older brother hasn’t even been around for years. The ranch is pretty big, and a developer wants to put in a subdivision on part of it. My parents are not really cool with the idea, but have been considering it, if it was only part of it and they had some control on what type development goes in.
Well, that is when they found out that my uncle, my mom’s brother, had already started contracts for the sale of over three quarters of the ranch. He is fighting them in court, saying that the deed was left in will to each of them. Gramps had the deed changed to just mom, he moved it into her name, not even dad's, before he died. “
“Then there’s a record.”
“Well, that’s the thing. Apparently, the deed wasn’t recorded properly. Unless we can produce the original with Gramps signature on it, we will lose over half the property. Honestly, probably most of it because after we pay the lawyers and all the other crap, we will be upside down. It’s a mess.”
“Why would your uncle do that to his sister?”
He smiled, “Money. That’s all he ever cared about. Not that the land has been in our family since the 1800’s. Not that he and Mom were both born there, not that Grammy is buried there, none of that matters. It’s about the almighty dollar.”
I shook my head. For years, I’d always wished I had a sibling. Right about now, I was thankful that I was a loner.
He sighed, “Anyway, that is what has me preoccupied. There is no
way we can afford this school if we end up having to fight for the ranch. This will be my last year.”
“I am so sorry I couldn’t see your grandpa.”
“It is really ok. I mean, it isn’t your fault.”
He looked at his phone.
“You have to go?”
“Yeah, sorry, I have practice.” He stood up but kept my hand in his. “Walk me out?”
We headed out to the front of the auditorium. The sun felt bright after the fluorescents of the basement. His long strong hand kept a tight grip on my fingers. “So, can we catch up later?” he faced me; his emerald eyes owned my attention.
“That would be nice.”
His expression shifted. His hand went for the back of my head and ever so gently, he kissed me, long and deeply, way more than I would be comfortable if anyone were around. He pulled away and smiled at me, and then flashed a taunting head nod towards the quad. I followed his eyes and saw a very disgruntled Moe walking the other direction. Ahh, so that was his motive.
“That was kind of mean.” I looked at him through my lashes.
His cocky grin spread across his face again, “I’m sorry, did you want to go out with him again?”
I shook my head, “No, I don’t think we have much in common.”
“I really gotta go, I’m gonna be running late as it is.” He kissed my cheek quickly and jogged away. “I’ll text you.”
I turned back toward the library, where I really needed to spend the next several hours. My head was filled with Jell-O. No thoughts were coming into focus.
My phone alert went off.
Apparently, I was late for my concussion checkup.
I headed off smiling, this could be interesting.
I was still showing improvement, and it looked like next week I should be completely cleared to head back to full normal schedules.
Just in time for Camryn to get back.