“The old king’s farm—in the highlands. That’s where she is now—” He coughed, a weak grin tugging at his mouth. “But you’ll never get there in time.”
CHAPTER SIXTY-FIVE
KAZI
“She’s over this way.”
A woman with sun-worn wrinkles guided us through knee-high grass on a trail that meandered away from the farmhouse. I stared at the braids that neatly circled the back of the woman’s head as I absorbed the certainty. Her eyes had given me my answer. I knew as soon as I asked, “Where is my mother?” She had looked down, confirming what I had always known. Jase walked beside me. He was quiet, unsettled by the truth even though he never knew my mother.
On a bluff that overlooked the valley far below, the woman stopped at a large, flat white stone.
Jase looked down at the plain marker. “This is it?”
She nodded.
“How long ago did it happen?” I asked.
“Years ago. Before I came.” She estimated that it had been about ten years, not long after my mother had arrived. The old cook had told her the story and made her promise to keep the grave marked.
“How did she die?”
“A brief illness, but the old cook said it was really a broken heart that took her. She knew the girl was fiercely unhappy, but she didn’t speak the tongue of the land and no one on the farm spoke hers. She had fits of tears and rage. It wasn’t until years later, after the girl had died, that the cook learned the king had procured his new wife from a Previzi driver.”
“New wife?” Jase said.
“That’s why she was brought here. The old king was an awkward, quiet man, but he wanted more sons. He believed a farmer needed sons. His wife had died, and he was disappointed with the son he had.”
She told us that the younger Montegue had no interest in farming and had never even set foot on the highlands farm in all the years she had worked there.
“Did he know what his father had done?” Jase asked.
She shook her head. “I think it was intended to remain a discreet arrangement until another heir was produced, but that never happened.”
That was why Zane had chosen my mother. He knew she already had one child and could likely have more.
“I’m sorry for your loss,” the woman said and looked down at the stone. “I know it’s plain. Would you like me to mark it with her name? We have some dye we use to mark the sheep.”
I nodded. “I’ll do it.” She left to get a paint pot and brush. Jase left with her, saying he would give me some time alone.
I looked down at the mound of earth and plain stone. I never got to say good-bye. I never wept for her loss. Even if my gut said she was dead, I never knew for sure. Without facts, there was always doubt. Wondering. What if?
It was settled now.
I turned and looked out over the valley, the view from her final resting place. It was beautiful. Something she would have liked.
“But you never rested, did you, Mama?” I whispered to the wind.
I knelt beside the grave and brushed my palm over the small mound. She had fits of tears and rage. “It was you, wasn’t it? Not letting go.” I spoke as if she could hear me, because I was certain she could. “Did you make a bargain with Death? Rage against him? Twist his arm? Make him watch over me? Make him push me to stay alive?”
As much agony as I had suffered, how much more had she endured? Her life had been about protecting me, and then suddenly she couldn’t.
I picked some of the tall prairie grass and began weaving it together the way she had taught me.
Like this, Kazi, one strand over another. She leaned over me.
Let’s weave a wish stalk in too.
Do wishes really come true, Mama?
Of course they do.
Make a wish now, Kazi, one for tomorrow, the next day, and the next. One will always come true.
I tied off the grass, shaping it into a crown, and laid it on her grave.
“I wish you rest, Mama.”
When Jase came back with the brush and dye, I marked her gravestone.
Mama
My chiadrah
My beloved
* * *
It would be months before the temple was rebuilt. But Vairlyn insisted on another ceremony, just as Jase had said she would. Not because a Vendan ceremony wasn’t good enough, but because a celebration was due.
We had a ribbon.
We had a priest.
We had a town full of witnesses.
Even with all the rubble around us and a ceiling of sky, the temple altar still stood.
The priest had finished his part. Now it was our turn.
“You remember the words?” I asked.
“Every single one.”
“You aren’t going to go getting all choked up again, are you?”
Jase smiled. “Nah. I’m experienced at this now.”
But as he began wrapping the ribbon around my wrist and helping me tie it off, he swallowed hard, and when he began speaking, his voice broke just as it had the first time. I squeezed his hand. “We’ve got this, Patrei,” I whispered. “And remember, we have a hundred more times to go.”
He nodded and leaned forward to kiss me, but Wren’s hand darted out and swatted him away. “That comes after,” she scolded. Our other witnesses who stood beside us, Synové and the entire Ballenger clan, rumbled agreement.
Jase’s eyes locked onto mine and he began again.
“Kazi of Brightmist … you are the love I didn’t know I needed.
You are the hand pulling me through the wilderness,
The sun warming my face.
You make me stronger, smarter, wiser.
You are the compass that makes me a better man.
With you by my side, no challenge will be too great.
I vow to honor you, Kazi, and do all I can to be worthy of your love.
I will never stumble in my devotion to you, and I vow to keep you safe always.
My family is now your family, and your family, mine.
You have not stolen my heart, but I give it freely,
And in the presence of these witnesses, I take you to be my wife.”
He squeezed my hand. His brown eyes danced, just as they had the first time he spoke his vows to me. It was my turn now. I took a deep breath. Were any words enough? But I said the ones closest to my heart, the ones I had said in the wilderness and repeated almost daily when I lay in a dark cell, uncertain where he was but needing to believe I would see him again.
“I love you, Jase Ballenger, and I will for all of my days.
You have brought me fullness where there was only hunger,
You have given me a universe of stars and stories,
Where there was emptiness.
You’ve unlocked a part of me I was afraid to believe in,
And made the magic of wish stalks come true.
I vow to care for you, to protect you and everything that is yours.
Your home is now my home, your family, my family.
I will stand by you as a partner in all things.
With you by my side, I will never lack for joy.
I know life is full of twists and turns, and sometimes loss,
but whatever paths we go down, I want every step to be with you.
I want to grow old with you, Jase.
Every one of my tomorrows is yours,
And in the presence of these witnesses,
I take you to be my husband.”
We turned, lifting our hands to the sky, the ribbon fluttering between us in the wind, our gazes meeting the cheers of witnesses. Synové sniffled, dabbing her eyes, and Lydia and Nash beamed beside Vairlyn. The rest of the Ballenger brood, including Paxton, clapped even as they conspired, exchanging whispers with one another, probably planning to dunk Jase in the plaza fountain, which I heard was a Hell’s Mouth tradition. We clearly wouldn’t be slipping into a quiet ruin of our own anytime soon. At least life with a large family would never b
e dull.
We looked out at the other witnesses who stood beyond the broken walls of the temple, still cheering, needing this celebration just as Vairlyn had said. I saw the butcher, the chandler, Beata, and Imara. And then I saw two other witnesses skirting the edge of the crowd, watching, witnesses I was sure no one else could see. The taller one pointed his bony finger at me and said, Not yet. Not today. He turned to the woman whose arm circled his. She wore a crown woven of prairie grass. She smiled, her own last good-bye. I memorized her face, the lines fanning from her amber eyes, her thick lashes, the warmth of her skin, the ease in her expression, rest, but mostly what I saw in her face was love. She nodded, and they both turned and were gone.
Good-bye, Mama.
Good-bye.
The celebration continued with mountains of feastcake, just as Jase had promised. Everyone brought some, all of them different, with their own taste surprises, none quite like Vendan feastcake, but maybe that made it better. We celebrated in a hundred different ways. And when the last cake was eaten and the last jig was danced, we each picked up a fallen stone and together began the work of rebuilding.
We pile rocks where my grandfather died. His bones are long gone, maybe carried away by a beast. But this is where he pressed the map into my hands and drew his last breath.
Tor’s Watch. It is up to you now. Protect them.
So far I have kept my promise to him.
I stand back and look at the memorial. We will make sure it always stands.
When Fujiko says a prayer to honor my grandfather and his last act as commander—giving up his life to save ours—Emi tries to repeat the prayer but cannot say the long word president, and twists it into something else. She squeezes my hand and says it again. Miandre nods approval, and thereafter, as leader of Tor’s Watch, I am known as Patrei.
—Greyson Ballenger, 23
CHAPTER SIXTY-SIX
JASE
One and a Half Years Later
The Candoran ambassador’s belly had grown, his red tunic rising over the table like a high tide. His buckles and jeweled chains shimmered in the flickering light of the bronze oil lamp and rattled every time he wheezed. His straza stood behind him, and ours behind us.
It seemed like nothing had changed—but everything had. The ambassador, in spite of evidence to the contrary, had just finished a long tirade complaining bitterly about the hard times that had come upon him because of our new business practices.
“It’s been a year and half. It’s hardly new, and you seem to be doing quite well.”
He was doing well. He never seemed to remember that we processed all the incoming and outgoing inventory.
Lukas toddled around the low table, fascinated with the ambassador and all his shiny buckles and chains. He pressed his tiny finger into the ambassador’s belly like it was a tempting jelly pastry.
The ambassador’s wiry brows twitched. “And what is this?” he grumbled, twirling his finger toward Lukas. “You bring a baby to a meeting?”
“My brother needs to learn the business.”
“He’s only a pup!”
“It’s never too early to learn.”
The ambassador pulled hard on his water pipe, his scowl deepening, even as he slipped a shiny bauble from his pocket and gave it to Lukas to play with.
“There are other places to trade, you know?”
Gunner tensed. I nudged him beneath the table to keep his mouth shut. Some things about Gunner would never change.
“I have important business elsewhere,” I said. “Take our offer or leave it. We’re breaking ground on a new addition to the settlement today, and we have special guests coming.”
“More special than a Candoran ambassador?”
“Very much.”
His thick fingers wove together across his belly. “Kazimyrah! You know that is a Candoran name. Maybe I should be negotiating with your wife!”
“You probably should be. She’d strike a harder deal than me. Lucky for you, she’s not here.” I stood and gathered Lukas into my arms. “Ready, brothers?”
“Oh, sit down!” the ambassador yapped.
I raised my brows, waiting. His puffy lips rolled over his teeth. “Your father always sweetened the pot. Are you not your father’s son?”
I stared at him, letting the time tick by just as my father would have. Yes, I was, in many ways. And in this way too. The Candorans were good neighbors and customers. “A new barn in the back pasture to accommodate your new dray mares.”
He choked on his pipe and stood, a rare toothy smile creasing his face. I probably overshot it a bit.
“Patrei, always good to do business with you.” He ruffled Lukas’s hair. “And this little one too.”
Once we were outside of his apartments, Titus threw his hands up in the air. “A new barn? Why didn’t you just offer him a new palace?”
“Stop counting coppers, Titus.” I reminded him that we had plenty of lumber. In the rebuilding of the town we had kept our mill working nonstop. Our warehouses were overflowing with lumber. “Plus, our drays up in the lumber camps are aging. When it comes time for us to negotiate with Candora for more, we’ll use the warm barn we so generously gave them as a negotiating tool.”
Gunner nodded, approving of my strategy.
Titus grunted. “If he remembers.”
“He will.” He was a sly dog who remembered every detail, including Kazi’s full name.
I missed her desperately. I hadn’t seen her in two weeks. We had put all our efforts into rebuilding the town first, and now we were making the final repairs on Tor’s Watch, which required a lot of last-minute decisions on my part. I had to stay behind while she went on to the settlement to prepare for the caravan’s arrival. It was more complicated this time, and there was a lot to do before we broke ground.
At Tor’s Watch the remaining half of Greycastle had been mostly salvageable, and the other half was repaired with some of the black granite from Darkcottage. Blocks of it had been found as far as a mile away. Greycastle was now a house of two colors, which Lydia and Nash had already started calling it.
The main house was done, though the interior still needed extensive work—except for Kazi’s and my new suite. I had rushed it along while she was away to surprise her when she returned. The walls and floor were dark, the way Kazi liked it, and I had the ceiling painted with constellations so there would always be stars above us. I was grateful that my library was mostly intact. Kerry had come to help me sort through the mess, and I had already read books to him as I had promised I would. Our suite had plenty of empty shelves that would be filled with more of our history. I guessed these last months alone would fill volumes. Priya’s library, on the other hand, the one she had transcribed from the time she was a child, just like me, was entirely gone. She took it hard, but then discovered Jalaine’s library was still all neatly shelved. She took it as her own, and it brought her comfort.
I buried Jalaine next to Sylvey just as she had asked. The family knew this time, but we kept it a secret from everyone else. Burial in the woods was not the custom in these parts—it was an oddity—and we didn’t want their place of rest to become a curiosity that brought onlookers and disturbed the peace of the mountain. So after Jalaine’s “entombment,” we had another ceremony with just the family at the base of Breda’s Tears. I still didn’t know how Jalaine knew about Sylvey. Kazi said that messages sometimes had a way of finding people, and Jalaine had straddled a line between life and death for weeks before she finally died.
“There a fire I don’t know about?” Gunner teased, trying to keep pace with me. “Someone would think you were eager.”
“Not trying to hide it, brother. I haven’t seen my wife in two weeks.”
He opened the door to our apartments, and we went in to change and get ready. Most of the family was staying here until the main house was finished. All traces of Montegue’s presence had been wiped clean.
“Where have you been?” Mason asked as soon as I wal
ked in.
“Had to settle our deal with Candora,” I answered, handing Lukas off to Aunt Dolise. She had recovered, and Trey and Bradach had returned home, but Lukas was a godsend, helping her through her grief, because Uncle Cazwin didn’t make it.
Gunner saw Mason following on my heels and said under his breath, “Someone else is eager too.”
Mason trailed after me all the way into my bedchambers. “We’re going to be late.”
“What are you so eager about?” I asked.
“They’re expecting us.”
“Kazi sent a message,” I told him. “Wren and Synové will be there. That’s something to be eager about. I’ve missed them. How about you?” They had been called back to Venda months ago to help escort the new caravan of settlers.
He shrugged it off. “I was talking about the queen.”
Maybe.
He pulled a shirt from my wardrobe and tossed it to me, trying to hurry me along. “It’s hard to believe she’s finally coming,” he said. “And the king. I wish Father were here to see this.”
“Maybe he knows,” I answered. “The Keep’s coming too.”
“Who’s the Keep?”
“According to Kazi, he’s the most powerful man in Venda, the queen’s right-hand man. He used to be the Komizar’s Assassin. I’d be nice to him.”
“What else would I be?”
“I don’t know, brother. Sometimes you can be a little harsh. Just be nice to everyone. It won’t cost you anything but maybe a little of your pride.”
CHAPTER SIXTY-SEVEN
KAZI
“Breathe,” I whispered to Jase. “He’s not an assassin anymore.” But I was nervous too. I hadn’t seen Kaden in over two years. I felt like a young pledge awaiting inspection.
Kaden swung down from his horse, then helped Pauline down from hers. Their three children rode in a wagon behind them. Griz lifted them down, holding the eldest, Rhys, upside down, pretending he couldn’t tell his head from his feet in spite of Rhys’s protests.
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