Hated You Then (Book One: Love Hurts Duet)

by M. Robinson

  I was excited, Daddy didn’t allow me to do much. Sayin’ he was protectin’ me from all the little shits who wanted a piece of his baby girl. Like they wanted a piece of his old lady...

  He didn’t play around when it came to his family. Raisin’ Luke and Owen to be just like him. They were becomin’ rabid guard dogs when it came to me as well.

  It was actually super annoyin’, but I loved my daddy too much to go against his wishes. So, I just didn’t tell him everythin’. I wasn’t lyin’, just withholdin’ information he didn’t need to know.

  Momma always understood me. She was forever on my team. Tellin’ me Daddy hadn’t changed. He was like that with her when she was my age, and she found it super annoyin’ too.

  “Trigger keeps starin’ over here at you,” I told Shiloh, catchin’ him lookin’ at her for the tenth time that night.

  We were dancin’ around the firepit on the beach, to Cash’s band’s live music.

  “Well, then let me give him something to look at,” she coaxed, spinnin’ around.

  Instantly, she flipped him the bird.

  Makin’ me laugh my ass off.

  Shiloh was a good ol’ girl and just like the boys, she was feisty.

  Don’t piss her off.

  However, she didn’t really cuss, got straight A’s, and didn’t cause problems for her parents.

  She was a role model for everyone, includin’ me.

  All that mattered to her was school and her family. She wanted to follow in her daddy’s footsteps to become a lawyer, attendin’ Stanford Law like he did too.

  But it was more than that, Shiloh was just smart about everythin’. Especially boys. The girl had her head on right and didn’t allow bullshit into her life.

  She wanted to get married a virgin and everythin’. Only allowin’ one lobster to love her for a lifetime.

  To say she was picky would be an understatement. She even had a “do’s and don’t’s” list for her future dude to keep her on track and the path she wanted to follow. No one stood a chance to her high standards.

  Specifically, the boys at our school.

  “I think he likes you.”

  “He likes the idea of me.”

  “What do ya mean?”

  “I’m way out of his league, Harley, and he knows it. Boys like Trigger only want one thing.”

  I cocked my head to the side. “Blowies?”

  “That and notches on their belts. I’m a challenge to him, and the worst part is, he thinks I’m stupid enough to fall for it. It’s offensive.”

  “Facts. He’s cute though.”

  “He’s alright. I’m not into hicks.”

  “Hey! I’m a hick.”

  “You’re my cousin,” she giggled. “And my best friend.”

  I nodded. “More facts.”

  She made a heart with her fingers. “Forever and ever, it’s me and you, girl.”

  I made a heart back. “You just spittin’ facts now, Shiloh.”

  We laughed.

  “What are they doing over there under the pier anyways?” she asked, shiftin’ my gaze to the group of football players, includin’ Jackson.

  I shrugged. “Bein’ shitheads?”

  “Do you smell that?”

  I took a whiff of the air. “I do now.”

  “Are they smoking a joint?”

  My eyes widened, thinkin’ of Jackson smokin’ pot.

  “Yeah, I think they are,” she added.

  She was right, they were. It was right in his hand.

  Before I knew what I was doin’, my feet were stompin’ their way over to him. Snatchin’ the joint from his fingers.

  “The fuck, Grem—”

  Crudely, I turned and walked straight to the garbage can. Tossin’ it where it belonged instead.

  By the time I spun back around, Jackson was in my face. Roarin’, “What the fuck?”

  “Yeah! What the fuck is right! What are ya doin’?”

  “Mind your own business, Harley.”

  “No! I will not! Why are you smokin’?”

  “Why do you care?”

  “Cuz your momma! That’s why!”

  He immediately gripped onto my arm, draggin’ me a little further down the beach where we couldn’t be heard. Once we were alone from pryin’ eyes, I tore my arm away and gave him a piece of my mind.

  “Why do you wanna be a stoner?”

  “A stoner? Smokin’ pot a few times doesn’t make me a stoner. Plus, I got more in my pocket.”

  “A few times? You’ve smoked before? Why do you have more of it?”

  “How many times do I have to tell you to mind your own fuckin’ business, Harley?”

  “As many times needed for you not to smoke weed!”

  He stepped toward me, loomin’. “Stop fuckin’ yelling at me.”

  “Somebody has to!” I pushed him. “You’re better than that, Jackson Pierce! Don’t fall for peer pressure like your stupid ass jock friends do!”

  “Fuck off!”

  I shoved him again.

  “Harley...”

  “Don’t ‘Harley’ me!”

  “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “Jackson! Why would you trigger anythin’ in your mind that could bring on demen—”

  He bit, kickin’ up the sand, “Shut your fuckin’ mouth, Harley.”

  “No, I won’t! This is stupid! You’re bein’ stupid! What do you havta prove to anyone? You’re the star quarterback, every girl wants ya. You’re already a legend in this town cuz of your arm,” I reminded, shovin’ him as hard as I could that time.

  “Stop fuckin’ pushing me,” he snarled through a clenched jaw.

  “No! You deserve it!” I went to shove him again, but he grabbed my arms, turnin’ me so my back was to his front.

  “Stop being a fuckin’ brat, before I really give you something to bitch about!”

  I didn’t hesitate, liftin’ my foot up to kick him in his balls but he blocked it. Holdin’ onto me tighter.

  “You really need to learn how to control that short Jameson fuse, baby girl.” He tugged me closer to his chest. “I wasn’t smoking.”

  “But you had a joint in your hand.”

  “Did you see me bring it up to my mouth?”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “Yeah, you wouldn’t. You have both your parents at home. Go home, Harley. You don’t belong here. Don’t make me text your daddy.”

  I gasped, “You wouldn’t.”

  “Try me again and watch how fast I send him every last video I have of you.”

  “Why would you be so evil? What other videos do you have?”

  “You’ll have to wait and see.”

  “Jackson, this is bullshit. I’m just tryin’ to protect you from doin’ somethin’ stupid.”

  “What do you think I’m trying to do?”

  I jerked back. I wasn’t expectin’ him to admit that.

  “So, then you do like me?”

  “Go. Home. Now.” With that he let me go, turned and walked back toward his friends.

  “I hate you!” I spewed to his back, watchin’ him walk away.

  Thinkin’ to myself, I couldn’t get the words out of my mouth for what I was truly feelin’.

  “You have me, Jackson. You’re not alone. Cuz you got me.”

  Sincerely meanin’ it...

  With each part of my confused, torn heart.

  <>Jackson<>

  I went home shortly after Harley left, wanting to put my plan into action.

  Harley didn’t have a fuckin’ clue, and I wasn’t going to allow her temper tantrum to deter me from what I honestly thought would work.

  Leaving my jeans where Mary Poppins could find them, I went about the rest of my weekend.

  Come Monday afternoon, I strode into my bedroom after school, knowing it was exactly where I’d find our nanny waiting for me.

  With a stunned gaze, I played dumb. My eyes roaming from her concerned expression to the ba
g of weed securely in her grasp.

  Hook, line, and sinker...

  I grinned. “I didn’t know Mary Poppins got high. Is that why she’s always so happy?”

  “Very funny, Jackson. We both know this isn’t mine.”

  “Are you trying to say it’s mine?”

  “Who’s else would it be? It was in your jeans.”

  “It’s not mine, and I have no idea how it got in there,” I lied, egging her on.

  “Oh, so it just magically grew legs and jumped in your pocket without your knowledge? Just happened to show up, while I placed them in the dryer to de-wrinkle your clothes? Try again.”

  Eyeing her skeptically, I threw my backpack on my bed. Witnessing her have a meltdown exactly how Harley had.

  “What exactly are you trying to do here? Get me fired? Huh? That’s quite the stunt to pull on me, even for you. Skyler could have me arrested! No more nursing school, no more future, no more nanny for you! No more nothing thanks to you. I’m already missing so many classes because I’m here caring for you, instead of showing up for school!”

  Offended, I put my hands up in the air. “Hey! I didn’t know you were going to dry my jeans. That’s on you.”

  I didn’t.

  I thought she’d find it before she threw them in the laundry.

  “So, you did know the bag was in your jeans?”

  Rolling my eyes, I scoffed out, “No. I didn’t.”

  “Then what? Huh? Explain to me what’s going on here, before I explain to Skyler what I think is going on instead.”

  I arched an eyebrow, unfazed.

  Finally. We were getting somewhere.

  Shrugging, I simply replied, “Then here’s your chance to get back at me, Camila. Go tattle, I don’t give a shit. Skyler’s not my mother and neither are you.”

  “So, you are smoking weed?”

  “Why does it matter to you if I am?”

  “You have your whole life ahead of you. You shouldn’t be smoking weed, that’s why.”

  “And why is that, Mary Poppins? You’re telling me you’ve never tried it?”

  “Nice try. This isn’t about me. This is about you.”

  “Actually, this is about both of us. You brought this on yourself. Stay out of my business and we won’t have any problems. Yeah?”

  “You know what? You’re right about one thing, I’m not your mother, nor do I want to be. Why is it so hard for you to see that? The stunt you pulled today crossed the line, Jackson! This is not okay! You know Journey is with me all the time, and the house reeked of weed because of your ploy to get me fired! Thank God I found a surgical mask to put on her, or else I would have been beyond screwed! You put your baby sister’s health in danger!”

  “Oh bullshit, you’re just being dramatic. There was barely any weed. She was fine.”

  I’d never do anything to hurt Journey. I thought she’d find it before her dumbass put it in the laundry.

  Some housekeeper she was.

  “How would you know? Are you in medical school? Do you have a degree in—”

  “Camila!” I shouted over her bullshit rambling.

  This wasn’t about her.

  It had nothing to do with her.

  She was my means to an end.

  “What do you want from me? If you’re looking for an apology, you’re shit out of luck, cuz you’re not getting one.”

  She stepped up in my face. “Do you have any idea how hard I’ve worked to get to this point in my life? I didn’t grow up like you with your million-dollar house, name brand clothes, and overly-priced education you take for granted.” She pointed to herself, standing her ground.

  One thing I knew for sure, she wasn’t leaving my room until she got her opinion across.

  She was going to put me in my place, regardless of the consequences.

  “I grew up poor with parents who struggled to put food on the table for all of their kids, but who still provided the best they could under the circumstances. I grew up with hand-me-downs, shopped at thrift stores, bought secondhand everything, just so I could have shoes to wear, a book to read, a calculator to do my math homework with. I didn’t grow up with a silver spoon in my mouth like you did! But I’ll tell you one thing, Jackson, if I had, you bet your ass I would’ve appreciated it and not have been a spoiled little shit like you who doesn’t know the meaning of the word grateful.”

  My eyes glazed over. It was quick, but she saw it.

  Don’t fall for it, Jackson... Stay strong.

  “It’s not my fault your parents didn’t know when to stop having kids.”

  Her mouth dropped open. “Wow. There is no getting through to you, is there?”

  “And yet, here you are, still trying.”

  She shook her head disappointed, stepping away from me. “I have nothing left to say to you.”

  “Great, cuz I don’t want to hear anymore. Tell Skyler whatever you want, maybe it will make my dad come home for once.”

  Shit.

  Mary Poppins was smart. It wouldn’t take her long to put two and two together.

  She cocked her head to the side with the realization of what my plan was, slapping her in the face.

  Fast and hard.

  “This wasn’t about me at all, was it?”

  “Get out of my room, Camila.”

  “You want me to rat you out, don’t you?”

  “I’m not going to say it again,” I warned, my temper threatening loud and destructive.

  “Jackson, acting out isn’t going to bring him hom—”

  I got right in her face. “Get out!”

  Her feet stumbled as I backed her out of my room, forcing her into the hallway before I slammed the door in her face.

  “Jackson!” She banged on the door. “You can’t do this! You can’t just shut me out like this!”

  “I just did!”

  “Come on! Give me a chance! All I’m asking for is a chance!”

  To both of our disbelief, I actually opened it. Getting right in her face again. “What else do I have to do to—”

  “What’s going on here?” Skyler announced, breaking up our argument. Catching us both by surprise.

  Mary Poppins turned to face her, still feeling my heated stare as she shoved the bag of weed in her back pocket.

  Still unsure of what to do.

  I watched her every move, just waiting for the other shoe to drop.

  Come on... just tell her already.

  “Yeah, Camila, what’s going on here?” I baited, wanting to move this along.

  “I- I- I- I mean... we were just...”

  There was only one way I imagined this would go down. Never in a million years did I think she would be this perceptive.

  Never in a million years did I think... she would care.

  The more she thought about it, the more she realized who I was and what I stood for. Football was my life, and I wouldn’t risk that for anything. It was the only thing I was truly passionate about in life, other than making her and Harley’s existence a living, breathing hell.

  I wanted my dad home, even if it meant I had to pay the price to make it happen.

  Her heart hurt more for me in that moment than it did over the last two months she’d been working for us. It didn’t matter how many times I pushed her away, she got right up to go another round with me again.

  Mary Poppins opened her mouth to say something but quickly shut it, looking over at me instead. We weren’t more than a foot apart, but it felt like miles of distance were placed between us.

  Physically and mentally.

  The confusion on my face was evident. There was no hiding it, because the truth was, Camila confused me.

  As the weeks continued to go by, she started getting in a little. Inch by inch, my guard began to come down toward her.

  Don’t get me wrong, I still hated her. Though that powerful emotion was geared due to the fact my father was never home. She stepped in, taking his place like Skyler did.

  He was
never going to come home if there was somebody here.

  Why?

  He didn’t have to.

  Did he even love us anymore? Were we even a thought?

  Time stood still in that instance, the truth consuming both of us.

  She was the first to break our middle ground. Locking eyes with Skyler, she muttered, “Jackson and I were just arguing about his laundry habits.”

  I stiffened beside her.

  “Jackson knows how to do laundry?”

  “Or lack thereof,” she added, smiling over at me.

  I narrowed my eyes at her, more confused than ever before.

  She had the chance to rat me out. Get back at me for all the shit I’d put her through, even the playing field once and for all.

  She didn’t.

  She took my side, being there for me.

  Making me realize right then and there...

  I was just as lost.

  As my father was.

  Chapter 22

  <>Jackson<>

  Then: Thirteen years old

  They say everything needs to come to a head.

  As the days continued on with no sign of our father, the further my resentment grew to a point of no return.

  Another month had flown by and still nothing.

  In spite of that, my dynamic with Camila had changed in ways I never expected. Our pranks developed into less hostile territory. We weren’t trying to take each other out like we were before. Now they were merely our source of entertainment.

  But I was still Jackson Pierce, and I still always won. At everything. Even our nicer pranks.

  Jagger and I walked into the house after school one afternoon, suddenly hearing Mary Poppins lose her shit on Journey’s stuffed animal in the living room.

  Screaming, “Can you hear me? I’m going to find you! And then we’re really going to have words!”

  “You know that’s a stuffed animal, right?” I questioned, looking at her like she’d lost her mind.

  She jumped as soon as she heard my voice, whipping around to face me. She yelled, “No! It’s your dad!”

  My father’s absence was affecting everyone in the house.

  “Since when did my dad become a bunny’s ass?”

  “He’s in here! I know it!”

  I tilted my head to the side, narrowing my eyes at her. “Mary Poppins, Journey is watching you lose your mind on one of her favorite stuffed animals. So, before you traumatize her any more than you already have, put it down and step away from the bunny.”