We brutalize each other, our mouths fighting for control, bodies grinding against one another, and I’m primed to explode. I don’t know how long it goes on, only I’m dangerously close to the edge, so damn near losing all control. Her hands delve into my hair, and she tugs hard, yanking my head back. We are both panting and glaring at one another, and it’s glorious.
I haven’t been this turned on in years.
Not since Vegas.
“You don’t have to like me to fuck me,” I rasp. “You’ve just proven that point.”
Her eyes narrow to slits, and I wait for her to sling her next shot. “I agree. You could be any man sitting on top of me and my body would respond the same way.” Her eyes glimmer mischievously. “Dion sat right there a half hour ago, only we were naked and he was sliding his cock in and out of my pussy, and I fucking loved it.”
“You’re really starting to piss me off, Firefly.” I knead her breast and shove my dick into her pussy through our clothes. “This pussy is mine and mine alone.”
“You are insane if you think I’m agreeing to that.”
I sit upright, still straddling her hips but keeping my hands away from her tempting body. “You will agree or I will slaughter any man who touches you in cold blood.”
“You wouldn’t.” Her face pales.
“I would and I wouldn’t advise you to test me.” I climb off her body, needing to get out of here before Rowan wakes. I don’t want him to see me like this—when I’m angry and sexually frustrated and quite likely to throttle his mother if she keeps this shit up. I’ll grab a few hours’ sleep across the road and come back when I’ve regained my composure.
“So, I’m expected to break up with my boyfriend and only have hate sex with you while you get up to who knows what in New York, and you seriously think I’ll be okay with that?”
I adjust my hard-on behind my jeans. “I don’t care what you think. All that matters is that pussy remains mine. What or who I do in my spare time is no business of yours.”
I haven’t fucked a woman in weeks. Not since I came to Chicago for the funeral. And the only woman starring in my dreams is the vengeful vixen glowering at me on the bed. Her messy blonde hair is strewn across the sheets like the rays of the sun, and she’s magnificent. No one holds a candle to her, and I have zero interest in calling any of my usual fuck buddies.
It’s safe to say Sierra Lawson has ruined me for all others. I’ve known it since Vegas, but I could continue the charade while she wasn’t a part of my life. Now, she is a part of my past, my present, and my future and the only woman I have any interest in fucking. Not that she will ever hear those words leave these lips.
She props up on her elbows, glaring at me. “I won’t accept double standards, and I’m not agreeing to fuck you. We share a son. We are co-parents, and that is the extent of our relationship.”
“We can do this the easy way or the hard way, Firefly.” I shrug. “I have no moral indecision when it comes to killing anyone you take to your bed, but can you say the same? Can you live with yourself if you continue this nonsense with that man and he ends up dead? We both know he is not worthy of you, so do us all a favor and stay away from him.”
Remembering I need her to continue hating me, I leave her with one final parting blow. “If I’m not mistaken, Saskia’s husband is out of town this weekend. I think I’ll pay her a little visit.” I harden my features and plant my mask firmly on my face, ignoring the hurt brimming in her eyes. “I’ll return to visit with Rowan at the original agreed time.” I walk out without giving her a backward glance, and she doesn’t verbally retaliate, my parting shot delivering the message, loud and clear.
“Stay with Sierra,” I tell Alessandro when I exit the house. “And make sure Frank goes with you if they leave the house. I’ll be back later.”
Alessandro throws Leo the keys to the SUV, and I climb into the front while he slides behind the wheel. Ciro gets in the back. “Where to?”
“Drive around to the back road and park at the rear of my house.” He looks at me like I’m nuts. “Just do it.”
“You’re the boss.”
We drive in silence around the corner and park behind the back wall that borders the house.
“What do you want to do with them?” Leo asks, casting a glance in the back seat.
The flowers are still propped up on the floor, against the side of the door. I have no idea what possessed me to buy her flowers. I’ve got to learn to manage my impulse control before I ruin everything. Presenting Sierra with flowers would have only given her the wrong impression. “Throw them in the trash,” I instruct, climbing out.
I’m punching in the code on the back door when my cell vibrates in my pocket. Pulling it out, I grimace.
“What’s up?” Leo asks, coming up behind me.
“Could this day get any worse?” I show him my screen.
Briefly, I consider not answering, but that will only infuriate him more, so I push the answer button as I stroll through the door and into the garden. “Saverio. What can I do for you?”
25
SIERRA
I fidget with the full skirt of my silver and gold ballgown as I attempt to tune my sister’s irritating voice out. Father insisted we travel to the gala event as a family, so I’m currently sequestered in a limo with my parents, Serena and Alfred, and Felix and Saskia. Our bodyguards are traveling in two armored vehicles. One in front of us and one behind us.
As usual, Saskia is monopolizing the conversation. She just loves the sound of her own voice. They only picked me up fifteen minutes ago, and I already want to bail. It would’ve been good to have Dion with me tonight, but I broke things off with him the Monday after that disastrous weekend.
I’m pissed Ben forced my hand, but the truth is, the writing was on the wall with my relationship even before Ben reentered my life. Initially, when Ben reappeared, terrorizing me that first night, he sent me racing straight into the safety of Dion’s arms. I tried to convince myself settling for safe and secure was the right choice, but it didn’t last long.
You will have to kill me before I’d admit this to anyone, even my besties, but Ben’s cold gaze, cruel words, rough touch, and brutal dominance has excited me like never before. Don’t get me wrong—he still scares the shit out of me and I haven’t forgotten he’s a cold-blooded killer, but I’ve turned into one of those idiots in romance books: the ones who get off on possessive alpha men who know how to work a woman’s body better than she knows it herself.
I’m determined to fight this madness, and it’s one of the reasons I have gone to great lengths to avoid him these past three weekends. He has already proven I can trust him with Rowan, so I have made myself scarce when he’s shown up and kept our interactions to the bare minimum.
Saskia throws back her head, laughing as Felix fills her glass with more Cristal Champagne. She smiles at her husband, and I can’t help wondering if her good mood has anything to do with Ben. I don’t know if he carried out his threat, but even the thought of it hurts so much.
I’ve got to stop nurturing stupid fantasies when it comes to that man. He has never been mine, and he never will be, and that’s a good thing, right?
“Here.” Serena tops off my glass from beside me. “You look like you could use this.”
“I have a feeling I’m going to need a lot more than a couple of glasses of champagne to survive this night.”
Father holds this ball every October in support of one of my mom’s charities—the recipient is rotated annually. Mom is on the board of several charities, and she spends her days volunteering and offering practical support, so she isn’t just a sponsor like a lot of wealthy women.
Mom was the inspiration behind my decision to work with The Dream Catcher Foundation. It’s a local anti-trafficking support center, and I man the phones one night a month with Esme. Pen tags along sometimes when Eric is at home to watch the kids. I also donate on a monthly basis as they are almost entirely reliant on donations to
survive.
Esme and I worked tirelessly with a small team from the foundation a couple of years ago to lobby local politicians to update the TVPA legislation.
What happened in Vegas troubled me for a long time, and after Rowan was born, I decided to do something practical about it. Human trafficking—and sex trafficking—is a massive global problem, and it’s something I feel strongly and passionately about. Maybe, returning to the fold won’t be such a bad thing if I can convince Father to make The Dream Catcher Foundation the annual recipient one time. These galas are attended by the richest and most powerful men in Chicago, and they always raise millions for the chosen charity. The Dream Catcher Foundation could do a lot with a sizable donation.
Tonight is important to Mom, and she’s the main reason I’m here. It’s been years since I attended one of these balls, thanks to my single-mother status, but Father seems to be in a forgiving mood lately.
That doesn’t make me suspicious at all.
“You aren’t mistaken,” Serena murmurs in my ear. “Tonight holds extra importance because Father has invited some powerful men, from out of state, to attend.”
“I’m surprised he insisted I be here. Isn’t he worried I’ll open my mouth and disgrace him?” I reply, sipping my champagne as I watch Saskia laughing with our parents and Felix while casting a surreptitious glance our way.
Serena and Saskia had a big falling-out a few years ago, and they aren’t close anymore. I bet Saskia hates the bond I have with Serena now. In her bitchy head, she probably thinks I orchestrated the entire situation just to reel Serena to my side, but she couldn’t be more mistaken. As much as I dislike Saskia, I would never, could never, deliberately harm her. She is still my flesh and blood—even if there is little about her I can relate to or respect.
“It’s a good thing you are here. It means you are officially back in the family, and that gives me peace of mind. I know you are passionate about things, but I suggest you keep your opinions to yourself and toe the line tonight. If you do anything to cause a scene, Father will blow a gasket.”
“Don’t worry,” I murmur, taking a healthy mouthful of bubbles. “I have no desire to ruffle any feathers. I have enough stress in my life as it is right now.”
She looks funny at me. “Is there something I should know?”
I want to confide in Serena so badly, but I’m afraid she might tell Alfred and he would tell my father and then everyone would find out and it’ll turn into an epic shit show. I want to avoid that, at all costs, so I have no choice but to keep the truth to myself. “It’s nothing. Work has been super busy, and we have a new receptionist. She’s ditzy as fuck, and she keeps making mistakes.” That’s not a lie. I’m the only acupuncturist at the center, and I’m booked out solid for the next three months. I’m having to turn down clients, which I hate. The manager is pushing for me to go full-time, but I won’t sacrifice my time with Rowan. If I wanted to work full-time, I wouldn’t have applied for a part-time position.
“We’re here,” Father announces, and I quickly finish my champagne. “It’s important we put on a united front tonight,” he adds, eyeballing me on purpose. “I want this event to go off without a hitch, and that means being charming and hospitable to all our guests.” He’s drilling a hole in my skull, and I know his little speech is all for me.
“Don’t worry, Father. I won’t embarrass you. I know how important tonight is to Mom.”
Saskia mutters something under her breath as the limo pulls up in front of the hotel entrance, but I ignore her. That’s the best way to handle my sister. It infuriates her when she doesn’t get attention. Pretending she doesn’t exist has always been my greatest weapon.
Alesso is waiting outside when my door is opened, and I gratefully accept his hand, struggling to get out of the car without stumbling.
I made the mistake of going dress shopping with Mom, and she coerced me into wearing this Christian Dior gown. It’s beautiful and a real showstopper with the golden mesh outer layer over a silver bodice and very full skirt. Clusters of beads and glittering diamonds in the shape of butterflies are strategically arranged over the length of the gown in a mix of silver and gold. The sweetheart neckline and corset-style top make the most of my cleavage. The makeup artist Mom sent to my house dusted my décolletage with a light coating of shimmer, and I’m wearing a trowelful of makeup, but she did a great job of making it appear natural. My hair is pulled into an elegant chignon, and I know I look good.
I just don’t buy into all the falseness, and I know I’ll need to keep a fake smile plastered on my face all night as spiteful women lie with their compliments while the men at their sides barely contain their leering looks. The bullshit is tiresome, yet it’s for a good cause. I’ll just have to keep reminding myself of that.
Alesso is dressed in an Armani tux, and he looks devilishly handsome as he offers me his arm. He is my official “date” for the night. Father wouldn’t let me attend on my own. I knew if I didn’t find someone, he would foist some horrible pervert on me. He wasn’t pleased I was bringing my bodyguard as my date, but I guess Mom sweet-talked him into agreeing.
Alesso almost passed out when I mentioned it to him until I told him the alternative was letting my father appoint my date for the event. That or asking Dion to do me a favor. It seems Ben quickly agreed to the arrangement after that.
“You look beautiful,” he says as we follow my family along the red carpet.
“You clean up very nice yourself,” I say, smiling and nodding as we pass members of the hotel staff. “On a scale of one to ten, how pissed is your boss?” I ask, fighting a smug smile. Considering how crazy Ben went that time in my hallway, I’m surprised he didn’t make Frank escort me tonight.
“You’ll find out soon enough,” Alesso murmurs as we walk across the marble lobby toward the main ballroom.
My strappy gold Dior heels make a clicking noise as we advance. “What do you mean?” I ask, smiling at the two men standing guard outside the ballroom as we pass by.
“Ben will be here.” He throws it out so casually, and I almost trip over my dress with the shock.
“What?” I cry. “Why would he be here?”
“It’s business,” he replies, taking my elbow and steering me toward the large circular table at the top of the room in front of the podium.
Ben must be one of the powerful out-of-state men Serena referred to. But why would my father invite him? As far as I know, Ben doesn’t have any pharmaceutical business interests or any connections to my father. From what I remember, Father wasn’t fond of Saskia’s boyfriend.
Thoughts of my sister has all the blood draining from my face.
Is she responsible for this? Did she maneuver things so her lover could be here?
Flaunting her lover in front of her unsuspecting husband’s eyes would be right up Saskia’s alley. Perhaps this is Ben’s way of paying me back for ignoring him.
“Business or pleasure?” I hiss, the bite in my tone clear, as Alesso holds out a chair for me.
He shrugs, like he knows nothing, and I inwardly seethe as he claims the seat on my left.
A waiter magically appears at our table, looming over my parents, holding a bottle of champagne in one hand. I lift my hand, waving to capture his attention. Father scowls at me, but he can’t say anything as he’s conversing with a short man with a rotund belly and a bad comb-over. I’ve met him before, but I can’t recall his name. He’s on the board of Lawson Pharma and a big suck-up.
The waiter fills my glass to the halfway point, and I encourage him to keep going. Alesso declines, filling his glass with water. Without asking, he fills a second glass, purposely sliding it to me. “You should pace yourself.”
“You should mind your own business,” I retort, taking a healthy glug of my champagne.
“Did something happen on the way through the lobby?” Serena asks, frowning as she slides into the seat on my right.
“No. Why would anything be wrong?”
&n
bsp; “You have a murderous look on your face, and you’re clutching that glass like it’s somebody’s neck.”
I bark out a soft laugh because she is so close to the mark. “I’m just trying to talk myself off a ledge. You know what I’m like. I’m practically allergic to these types of events.”
Things only go from bad to worse as the room quickly fills. My parents, Saskia, Felix, and Alfred are busy greeting guests while Serena and I talk in hushed voices at the table. Champagne sloshes through my veins, helping to relax me, but I don’t want to get drunk and end up disgracing myself. I’m a mom, and that role is the most important thing to me. I never want to do anything to let Rowan down. So, I drink water, deciding to take Alesso’s advice and pace myself.
Father claps his hands, looking proud as punch, as he fixes a wide smile on his face, moving away from our table to greet someone. The look on Saskia’s face tells me all I need to know, and I swivel in my chair, watching a large group approach this side of the room.
A distinguished-looking man leads the charge, escorting a knockout Sophia Loren look-alike on his arm. The woman has long dark hair, styled into glossy curls, and killer curves that make her gorgeous fitted red dress look molded to her body like a second skin. Piercing blue eyes and full lips painted in a similar shade of red complete her look. She wears a diamond choker and matching bracelet, and she screams sophistication in an effortless way.
I’m so entranced by the unfamiliar woman that I don’t see Ben until he is a few feet away, holding a chair out at the table right alongside ours. A painful pressure sits on my chest as a gorgeous brunette slides onto the chair, beaming up at him like he hung the moon. My claws come out, and I want to gouge her eyes from her eye sockets so she can’t look at him like that and slice her lips from her face so she can’t smile adoringly at him.
Condemned to Love:  Page 20