The second one, Rheba, gives me a slow once over. “You sure, sweetie? He’s cute, but I know where that sweet talk leads.”
My head jerks back and my cheeks flame.
“Yes,” Sage says. “He’s not the problem. He… he’s my boyfriend.”
33
Sage
When I left this rambunctious group of women, I made it five feet before I gave up hope of finding my way back to my friends. Of watching the eclipse with Neb. They were still watching me when I turned around and swaddled me into the center of their group where I collapsed onto the ground.
But now here he is, missing the eclipse and I casually labeled us before we ever talked about it. For all his confidence and ease, he looks completely unsure of himself.
But wait.
“Neb! You’re missing the eclipse!”
The ladies finally part, giving him space to come closer, and he crouches next to me. “Boyfriend, huh?” He trails a finger along my jaw. My eyes close on their own and I lean into his caress.
“Ahh, she’s in good hands,” one of the ladies says.
“I know we didn’t talk about it and I didn’t mean to just throw that out there but—”
He places his finger over my lips. “I’d love for you to be my girlfriend.”
I open my eyes and the emotion on his face makes me feel like maybe everything will be okay. How am I so lucky to have found him? A shadow falls over us and we both look up, then quickly back at each other. “You’re missing this.”
He presses his forehead to mine. “I lost my glasses.”
“You have more, right?”
“Not on me.”
“This is all my fault.”
“Stop.” He takes my hands in his and looks in my eyes. “You did nothing wrong. You were scared, and that’s okay. And if I miss this, it’s okay because—” He glances at the sky then back at me. “You’re worth it.”
Three simple words better than any other combination I could hope for. Better than another promise or declaration. Because he’s showing with his actions how much I mean to him.
But he’s not missing this for me.
Before I can stand, he scoops me into his arms, stands at his full height, and carries me toward the center of the field. Cradles me to his broad chest. And the bliss and heart eyes evaporate. My body stiffens as an incredible urge to push him away and stay huddled with the ladies courses through me. My breathing slows. My skin crawls. Everything shuts down while my mind screams to run.
Because this is exactly how it started with Pax. Picking me up. Literally rescuing me like a knight in shining armor. Or Starlord in flannel.
Neb’s noticed my reaction.
“Are you hurt?”
“No. It’s just.” I force a breath. “Can you put me down?”
His jaw ticks. “Let me get you out of here.”
My pulse races unsteadily.
He’s only helping.
He cares about me.
He’s deciding what’s best.
He’s not listening to me.
I don’t get a say.
What I want doesn’t matter.
My body isn’t mine.
“Stop!” My shout stumbles off my tongue. A few people eye us through their black-out glasses, but no one stops to help. Because the big strong man is always right.
Neb lowers me to my feet. He doesn’t let go of my arm, but he puts a little space between us. “What did I do?” The confusion and worry on his face nearly break my heart. He’s not Pax. Not bad.
Tears spring to my eyes and I shake my head. “It’s not you. It’s my head. It’s—” Tell him.
He lifts his hand from my arm to my cheek and cradles it without moving closer. “I’m never going to hurt you.”
The tears turn to full-on sobs that shake my whole body. Despair that I’ll never be okay battles with desperation to believe him. To trust that he’ll always be a good person. “You can’t know that.”
His lips pull into a frown and his eyes shine in the dim light. “No. But I can promise to always be the man my dad raised me to be.”
The darkness feels like a blanket, enveloping us in our own private world. We stare at each other for what feels like an eternity, and finally, like popping a cork, my breathing slows. The panic lessens. My sense of self starts to return. He isn’t forcing me to believe him, or even to listen. He’s giving me the space I need.
I reach for his hand. He grips my fingers, but otherwise doesn’t move. “And I promise—” What? Not to freak out on him for the sins of another man? I take a step forward so mere inches separate us. “I promise to always believe you.”
He swallows hard, his jaw firm. “I don’t know what happened to you, or what you’re still dealing with, but I like you. A lot. And I want to be here for you.” He glances at our hands. “For all of it.”
They’re exactly the words I want to hear. Better than any plot in a romance novel. With the perfect inflection and the appropriate amount of physical contact so as not to scare me away.
And yet the little voice in my head whispers to be careful.
Maybe I’ll never be rid of her, and maybe that’s a good thing. Because I don’t ever want to repeat what happened with Pax. I refuse to let it. I’d rather spend the rest of my life alone than be trapped in something I can’t escape.
But for now, I choose to trust my heart. To trust Neb. To believe what he’s saying because he hasn’t given me a reason not to.
I close the space between us and look into his eyes. “I like you too. And I would really like it if you kissed me now.”
He gives me a soft smile. “Are you sure?” When I nod, he lowers his head to mine and gives me the softest, most gentle kiss imaginable.
The people around us erupt in a cheer. We jump apart and look around, but everyone’s focused on the sky. On the eclipse.
I grip his shoulders. “It’s happening!”
Nearby, echoey piano notes drift from a cell phone. Then the words start. “Turn around…” People sing along, waving their arms in the air.
“How do they all know this?” Neb asks.
My jaw drops. “Total Eclipse of the Heart? You had to know this was coming.” As the music grows louder, the instrumental coming to a crescendo that has the crowd swaying, I feel like the lyrics are talking to me. That I’m coming out of the darkness and all I want is to be in his arms.
He laughs under his breath and does exactly what I want. He pulls me into an embrace, protecting me from everyone around us, and kisses me like we’re the only two people on earth. It feels like we’re on the edge of the night. That forever is starting now.
People sing the words around us as the music grows louder. I want to stay in this moment forever, but the whole reason we’re here is slipping away with every soft breath that passes between us.
“I can’t believe you’re missing this,” I whisper against his lips.
He shrugs, and the corner of his mouth lifts in a smile. “I’ll catch the next one.”
My heart melts. Right there in the middle of a random football field surrounded by thousands of strangers. But I can’t let him miss this for me. “Let’s go.”
He leads me through the crowd—there really is an advantage to him being so tall—and the second I see Naomi, she pushes through the people around us to tackle me.
“Where the hell did you go? I was so worried!” She runs her hands over my arms and shoulders like she’s checking me for injuries.
The guys who harassed me feel like an eternity ago and my energy falters just thinking about it. “I’ll tell you later.”
I grab my glasses from my backpack and hand them to Neb.
“No, they’re your glasses. You should look first.”
“Neb, are you kidding me? This is your moment. Take them.” I shove the glasses in his hand, careful not to tear the black plastic, and he finally takes them.
“Science Boy lost his glasses?” Kit asks. Neb tenses, but Kit throws an
arm around his shoulder and laughs. “Nice to know you’re human after all.”
Neb bumps his shoulder against Kit and laughs as he slips on my glasses. He watches the sky, a look of pure wonder on his face. Then his hand finds mine and when our fingers lace together, I feel safe. Like I’ve finally found where I belong and I don’t have to hide or pretend to be someone I’m not.
Naomi loops her arm through mine, and we ooh and ahh as almost complete darkness descends. Total Eclipse of the Heart blasts from another phone and as we all sing along, my heart feels like it might burst.
We stay like that as the moon moves past the sun, revealing a crescent of sun. Neb’s hand tightens on mine. “There’s nothing I can say…”
I snort as he quotes the lyrics.
His free hand touches his chest where his pendant is and a tear runs down his cheek.
“I’m glad I could be here with you.”
“I am too,” he whispers.
It turns out that despite being in outer space, the eclipse is pretty slow. We have plenty of time to see it, even with my earlier escapade, and we take turns with the glasses, arms locked, for another half hour before people start packing up.
It feels strangely like a metaphor for my life. Like I was afraid I’d thrown away the best years of my life with someone awful, but that was only my first chapter. I’ve got plenty of time. And sometimes life’s better when you stop worrying so much and just look up and enjoy the view.
EPILOGUE – Neb
April 6 – Seven Years Later
“Come on, Sage, we’re gonna be late!” I double check the trunk for supplies, but nothing’s changed since I checked five minutes ago. Tent, camp chairs, picnic blanket, enough food for several days, and a dozen pairs of black-out glasses.
“Sorry!” she calls through an open window of our apartment. “Naomi and the guys should get to the campground about the same time as us.” A moment later she pushes through the door to the building and shields her eyes from the sun. “I didn’t think to bring regular sunglasses, but maybe I should grab them…” she trails off, her hand still on the door.
I exhale loudly for her benefit. We’ve been living together since junior year of college and have been compatible since that first camping trip in high school, but our one sore spot is our difference in opinion about punctuality. As in, I arrive when expected, while Sage has a more fluid belief about time.
She moves to my side and pushes to her toes to kiss my cheek. “I’m kidding. They’re in my bag.”
In a swift motion, I wrap my arm around her waist, pull her to my chest, and kiss her for real. When we first moved in together, people warned us that the romance would die, but if anything, it’s gotten more intense. Her fingers play with the hair at the back of my neck and my mouth slides to her throat. When she lets out a soft sigh, I pull back. “You’re not tricking me into being late.”
“Who me?” She presses a hand to her chest and flutters her lashes. “I would never.”
I love this playful side of her. She still has moments where her past tries to get its claws in her, but she’s made a lot of progress. We’ve made progress together. I tap my pendant and glance at the sky. “The eclipse waits for no one.”
Once we’re on the road, Sage shifts in her seat so she’s facing me. “Naomi says Kit’s bringing Thomas.”
“It’s about time. They’ve been dating for almost a year.”
“I was starting to think we’d never meet him, but Naomi can be very convincing.”
And I’ll always be grateful for that.
Naomi and Kit reconciled after Kit came out midway through senior year of high school. Apparently that was the big secret that only Theo knew, and the reason Theo put up with so much of Kit’s crap. “Is Theo bringing Becca?”
“Nah, they’re off again. Said he didn’t want to add any drama.”
I reach for her hand on across the console. “But what would camping be like without a little drama?”
She shudders. “That was enough drama to last a lifetime. I’m one hundred percent happy with our no-drama lives.”
I pull her hand to my lips and kiss her fingers. “I am too.”
Both our phones vibrate, and Sage checks her screen. “It’s Kit. Says, ‘Hey Sage, is it cool if I bring my new neighbor? He doesn’t have any friends…’”
“Tell him yes.”
She faces me and the smile that spreads across her face fills me with a happiness I thought I’d lost when my dad died. But every day she’s shown me that the worst days of our lives don’t have to define us. They may change us forever, but it’s what we take away from that pain that makes us who we are.
And I’m pretty damn happy.
To You, the Reader
I first got the idea for this novel on August 21, 2017—the day of the Great American Eclipse—but didn’t start writing it until the fall of 2019. Then the pandemic changed the world so drastically that writers everywhere weren’t sure what it meant for the future of contemporary novels. Slipping into the summer of 2017 was an escape for me, and I hope you had the same experience.
If you enjoyed Sage and Neb’s story, please consider leaving a review on Goodreads or any online bookseller’s website.
* * *
Connect with Melanie online:
www.melaniehoo.com
[email protected]
Newsletter: melaniehoo.com/hoos-letter
Facebook/MelanieHooyenga
Twitter: @melaniehoo
Instagram: @melaniehoo
* * *
Or if you prefer pen and paper:
Melanie Hooyenga
PO Box 554
Grand Haven, MI 49417
Acknowledgments
Thank you to everyone who helped me write my tenth novel.
My early readers, who encouraged me to dig deeper, share what the characters are thinking, and add more space jokes: Nancy Matuszak, Stephanie Scott, Adrienne Whisman, and my mom, Judy Hooyenga.
The Twitter writing community for an endless supply of said eclipse jokes: Heather Levy, AM Rose, Danielle Hammelef, Christy Helzner, Jennifer Mercieca, Steve Austin, and Dee Long.
Taylor Swift, for releasing the album Lover, which I listened to on a loop while writing this book.
Sara Spock Carlson, for always answering random texts about plot issues, being an encouraging sounding board, and for being an all-around amazing human.
And finally, my husband Jeremy, for your unceasing support of my “side gig” and making me laugh when I need it most.
About the Author
Multi-award winning young adult author Melanie Hooyenga writes books about strong girls who learn to navigate life despite its challenges. She first started writing as a teenager and finds she still relates best to that age group.
Her award-winning YA sports romance series, The Rules Series, is about girls from Colorado falling in love and learning to stand up on their own. Her YA time travel trilogy, The Flicker Effect, is about a teen who uses sunlight to travel back to yesterday.
When not at her day job as Communications Director at a local nonprofit, you can find her wrangling her Miniature Schnauzer Owen and playing every sport imaginable with her husband Jeremy.
Other books by Melanie Hooyenga
The Flicker Effect
FLICKER
FRACTURE
FADED
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The Rules Series
THE SLOPE RULES
THE TRAIL RULES
THE EDGE RULES
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Anthologies
THE ART OF TAKING CHANCES
LOVE ON MAIN
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