by L. E. DeLano
Coupons hang from decorative hooks on the walls and displays, and some even dangle in clusters from the ceiling on colorful wires, all while the dozen or more TV screens around the store blare out ads for various products. Even the glass doors on the beverage cases have ads that interact with you. I’m fascinated by it all, flashing around me, screaming their catchphrases and playing their jingles.
I’m meandering down the aisle, thoroughly intrigued by the strange and unusual products I’m seeing on the revolving store shelves. Therapeutic tar and strawberry face gel? Sticky-Wicky Chips? And what the hell is Candied Rage Fruit? You never know what you’re going to find when you enter an alternate reality, I guess.
“What do you think she wants?” Finn asks.
“How would I know?” I shrug. “Why don’t you ask her?”
He stares at the woman warily, and I have to admit he’s not being paranoid. The woman is watching his every move.
“I don’t have a good feeling about this,” he says. “We don’t know if she has an ulterior motive.”
I realize I’ve been so busy looking at all the crap in this stupid store, the thought didn’t even occur to me.
“I’m going to go talk to her,” I say, but before I can start forward, he puts his arm out to stop me.
“I’ll go,” he says.
I lower my voice again to a furious whisper. “If she’s being duped by Eversor into setting us up—”
“—then I’ll find out,” he finishes. “I’m the one she’s staring at. I’ll go.”
He wanders over to the display of blueberries beside the peaches, then leaps back in surprise as a giant stuffed berry on top of the stand comes to animatronic life, singing to him about the wonders of antioxidants. Sheesh. This place is unreal.
I hear him say hello to the woman and make some small talk about the weather, and then my hand claps over my mouth as I hear the dirty old broad proposition him in very descriptive terms. He shuts her down as diplomatically as possible, and I turn and walk for the cover of the nearest aisle so he can’t see me laughing.
“Amused, are you?” he grumbles as he falls into step next to me.
“Oh, come on, you have to admit it was funny.”
Finn gives me a death glare. “She was fifty if she was a day. And she was moments away from grabbing my arse.”
“She was a cougar,” I say with a smirk. “And she thought you were cute.”
“Well, let’s reverse that, shall we?” He glowers. “If some middle-age man with a bad hairpiece was chatting you up in the market, trying to get you to accompany him to his home to do his domestic chores without a shirt on, would it still be funny?”
I hadn’t thought of it that way. “No, it wouldn’t. You’re right.”
“’Course I’m right,” he says. “And do I look like I’m a lawn boy? I don’t even have a lawn!”
“You didn’t have to come along,” I remind him. “There isn’t even a you in this reality.”
“And what about you?” he asks grumpily. “Are you aligned with the mysterious ‘Ben’ here?”
“I haven’t seen Ben Hastings in this reality at all. I’m not in Ardenville, remember?”
“Hastings?” Finn looks surprised. “Lovely.”
“You know Ben?”
“I’ve run into him a time or two.”
“Good or bad?”
“Mostly indifferent,” he replies as we start loading stuff onto the conveyor belt at the checkout stand. “He’s a bit of a fop, if you like that type. How long until we can return?”
I ignore his remarks and glance at my phone. “They’re at the end of the finale—I’m in that, too. Once that’s done, I need to give her at least five or ten more minutes so Mom can come backstage and congratulate her.”
“Pity I won’t see you dance.”
“It’s pretty impressive—for me,” I tell him. “I have a solo in the middle of the number. Lots of kicks and a triple turn with a giant candy cane in my hand.”
“It sounds quite thrilling.”
“A real showstopper,” I say as I pay the clerk and he grabs the bags. We head for the doors and out into the parking lot.
“Speaking of shows…,” I say. “You told me to ask about you being a magician.”
“Ah, yes. I did.” He nods.
“We’ve got some time to kill. Might as well enlighten me.”
“There’s not much more to it than your own ballerina story,” he says, raising his voice a bit to be heard over the sound of the advertisements playing over the loudspeaker in the parking lot and the noise of the video screens over the cart returns shouting out the weekly sales.
“I have a younger brother in some of my alternate lives,” he tells me. “In one particular version of my life, he’s injured and uses a wheelchair. In the early days after his accident, he didn’t get out as much. I used to teach him magic tricks.”
“So you became a magician in order to do that?”
“I borrowed the knowledge from another of my selves,” he says with a smile. “I cheated.”
“I think we established that it’s not cheating. It’s shared knowledge.”
“You have to admit, it all comes in quite handy at times.”
I glance at the time once more as we reach the car and start loading our bags in. “Not too much longer. They’re just about done now.”
“Hey, handsome!” a voice calls from behind us. “Little help?”
We turn in unison, and it’s the older lady again. Her grocery bag hangs in tatters and peaches are rolling all over the parking lot.
“Are you kidding me?” I huff under my breath.
Finn rolls his eyes and hands me his bag. “I suppose I should do the chivalrous thing and help her.”
“Watch your arse,” I goad, and he gives me a dark look before stalking over to her. I follow behind.
“Nice selection of man candy at this store,” the woman calls out to me with a wink. “Am I right, honey?” She gestures to her fallen bag, and I bring my hand up, pretending I have an itch on my nose so Finn can’t see that I’m trying not to laugh. He glowers at me anyway, and when he bends over to pick up the fruit, she’s definitely enjoying the view.
I can’t help it, a laugh squeaks through, but a heartbeat later I am stone-cold serious as I see a car round the corner at the end of the aisle behind Finn—and I hear the engine gun. There’s no time to call a warning. I reach out and grab his arm, spinning him and yanking him back hard as the speeding car whizzes by. We both slam down onto the asphalt of the parking lot. The car screeches around the corner at the end of the row and keeps on going, but not before I get a clear look at the driver.
My palms are scraped, and my right knee feels like I ripped it up, as well. I flip over as fast as I can to see Finn, lying on the ground not far from me, his body contorted and writhing. I scramble over to him, keeping an eye on the car as it leaves the parking lot.
“Oh my God!” the woman says, rushing over to us. “She could have killed you! I didn’t get the license plate. She was going so fast!”
Finn grips my arm, and he’s still not breathing right. “Jess—Jessa! H-help me up.”
I look at him frantically because his breathing is so labored, and he’s clutching his shoulder. I don’t see blood anywhere, and he’s rolled to his knees.
“I’m all right,” he says. “Let’s just get out of here.”
I glance at Finn again, alarmed by how flushed he is. I wrap my arm around him and he manages to stumble to his feet with a grimace as the woman admonishes him for moving. He throws himself into the passenger seat of my car as I climb in and shut my own door. Then I throw the car in reverse, driving out of the lot as fast as I safely can. I pull off once we reach a side street.
“Are you okay?” I pant. “Tell me you’re okay!”
“Was that her?” he thunders.
I nod. “Yes. It was her.”
“Dammit!” He punches the door, and then he groans and grabs at his
upper arm.
“You’re hurt!”
He waves me off. “The mirror on her vehicle clipped my shoulder. I’ll have one hell of a bruise, and I got the wind knocked out of me, but I’m all right.”
“Hang on,” I say, putting the car in gear. “I’ll get us out of here. We’ll go back to the store and get some ice for your shoulder. We can wait there until we’re sure she’s good and gone.”
“Are you mad?” His hand shoots out, grabbing mine. “We have to catch her! Which way did her conveyance go?”
“We’re not going after her!” I say adamantly. “She’s trying to kill you!”
“We don’t have time for this!” he snaps. “If you’re not going to chase her then get out and I’ll bloody well drive!”
“I am not losing you again!”
He stares at me in silence, tense and very, very angry.
“I didn’t even see where she drove off to,” I lie. “So calm down and let’s get you taken care of.”
I take my foot off the brake and ease out onto the road, determined to ignore the trembling of my fingertips, the pain in my body, and the sound of Finn grumbling under his breath. My eyes scan the road, trying to tune out the blaring, blazing billboards on either side. It looks like Eversor is long gone, but I’m not taking any chances.
I return to the store, being careful to park around back so we won’t be recognized from the road. Finn waits in the car while I run inside. He glowers at me when I take the keys out of the ignition, but I wouldn’t put it past him to drive off and leave me, as pissed as he is. I return with a bag of frozen peas.
“Can you move it?” I ask, laying the bag of peas across his shoulder. He winces and reaches up to adjust it.
“I’ll get by.”
“We should have a doctor look at it.”
“It’s fine.” His jaw is ticking furiously, and he won’t look at me. I glance down at the dashboard clock.
“Let me leave my other self a note so I know to be on the lookout—just in case Eversor comes back,” I say, fishing a pen out of my purse and scrawling a quick note on the back of the cash register receipt. I leave it on the dashboard and then I angle the rearview mirror so I can see into it.
“You ready?”
He glowers at me again and gives a nod as he shifts over next to me. He’s smushed into me so we can both see the mirror, and I can feel that every muscle in his body is stiff and rigid. I place my fingers against the mirror, and a few moments later, she responds.
In the space of a heartbeat, we’re through to the dressing room at the retirement home, and I’m clutching a big wad of tissues in my hand—which is a really good thing because I immediately burst into tears as the aftermath of both realities washes over me.
Here, I had finished my final curtain call and run around to the back, where my mom met me in the middle of the hallway. She had thrown her arms around me with a “Wow! Jessa! You’re amazing!”
She’d gushed over me for a good long time, and I knew I was about to cry so I’d just hugged her and hugged her. Mom had finally had to awkwardly pry me off her and remind me that I needed to get out of my costume. Then I’d made my way to the now-empty dressing room and, according to the tearstained note I’d left myself, I doubted I’d ever been this happy.
Well, at least that went all right. I feel guilty because I had to leave her a note explaining why she’s covered in scrapes and bruises.
I can see my reflection in the mirror in front of me. I’m riding a crazy mix of elation and fear. Everything’s a jumble. I see Finn in the mirror behind me, pacing the room and rotating his arm.
“Is your shoulder okay? We can probably get some ice for you.”
“Damn!” he exclaims. “She was that close!”
He slams his fist angrily down onto a nearby table, and a couple of props tumble off and hit the floor.
“Hey! Watch it!”
“How did you not see her before that?” he demands. “She had to be close by. Perhaps even following us through the market!”
“I was shopping!” I shout back.
He turns away with a growl and kicks a chair, sending it skittering across the floor.
I get shakily to my feet, wanting to put some distance between us. “My mom must think I’m nuts, falling apart on her like that. I’d better get out there.”
He’s not even looking at me, and now I’m adding a new emotion to go with my alternating joy and terror: anger. He’s acting like this is my fault.
Mario was right—Finn is only here because he wants to get Eversor. And I can lead him right to her.
I am suddenly incredibly tired. I just want to go home. I reach down and start packing up my stuff as Finn throws himself into a chair and sulks with his arms across his chest. Eventually I walk over to the door, not even bothering to look at him. He can just sit there and stew all day, for all I care.
Of course, I don’t get that lucky. He stomps out after me. We make it down the hallway and turn the corner, where I run smack into somebody carrying a bouquet of flowers.
Crap.
I guess Ben decided to show up after all.
16
Sparring Match
“What the…?” The flowers slip out of Ben’s fingers and fall to the floor as he stares openmouthed at Finn.
“Ben,” I say, stepping between them. “We have to talk.”
“He’s here?” Ben is still staring at Finn, who has jammed his hands into his pockets and is rocking back and forth on his heels.
“Is he always this astute?” Finn asks blandly.
I give Finn a warning look, but he’s staring at Ben.
“He can’t be here!” Ben hisses. “Everyone thinks he’s gone!”
“Well, now I’ve returned,” Finn says amiably. “I’m sure I’ll pick up right where I left off.”
He gives Ben a purely taunting smile, and Ben looks like he’s about to turn green and split out of his shirt. I need to defuse this situation, and fast.
“Can we take this someplace private?” I ask. “Please?”
“Fine,” Ben bites out. I turn to walk back to the room we just left, but Finn takes a few steps forward and scoops up Ben’s flowers.
“Here you go, love,” he says as he hands them to me.
Ben takes two steps and yanks the flowers out of my hands. “I’ll give her my own damn flowers!”
“Stop it! Both of you!”
I turn and walk back into the dressing room, holding the door for Ben. I put a hand to the middle of Finn’s chest when he tries to go in behind him.
“Hold on,” I say. “Let me talk to him alone for a minute.”
Finn gives me a stony look. “Not a chance.”
“Stop.” Honest to God, I’m just not in the mood for this.
“Less than half an hour ago we were very nearly killed,” he reminds me. “I’m not letting you out of my sight.”
“You were what?” Ben demands from behind me. He spins me around. “Was it Eversor?”
I nod. “Not here. Over there. And she was aiming for him.” I jerk a thumb over my shoulder in Finn’s general direction.
“And if she tries again, I’ll be waiting,” he snarls.
“Of course you will,” I shoot back. “You wouldn’t miss it for the world!”
“And what is that supposed to mean?”
“Hey!” Ben snaps. “I’m over here, remember? And I need some explanations. Now.”
I let out a sigh and motion for Finn to enter the room before I shut the door. “Stay there,” I tell him.
He rolls his eyes at me as he leans his shoulder against the door, but he looks like he’s going to stay put. I grab Ben by the arm and walk him back toward the far corner of the room.
“He’s here to keep an eye on me while I travel,” I tell him quietly. “Like a bodyguard.”
“I thought you told Luigi—”
“Mario.”
“Mario. I thought you told him you wanted to be away from him.”
<
br /> “Mario thought that since we knew each other already, we’d be able to work together.”
“What do you mean, ‘you knew each other’?” Ben’s voice rises with alarm.
“Will you calm down?” I urge. “I met him in another reality. I met you, too, over there, if that makes a difference to you. Only you weren’t a pirate.”
“He’s a pirate? Great.”
“He’s a privateer,” I correct.
Ben gives me an annoyed look. “That’s a pirate who just happens to be on the right side of the current government.”
“An important distinction,” Finn says, coming up behind me. “But I’m still the man with the ship and the dashing reputation.”
I let out a huff of air, and before I can answer him, Ben reaches out to take my hand.
“Hey,” he says, “he’s not the only one watching out for you, y’know.”
“The lady doesn’t need another bodyguard,” Finn’s voice cuts in. “You can go about your business and let us handle it from here.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” Ben says. “And you don’t even belong here.”
“Yet here I am,” Finn says, folding his arms across his chest.
“Come on, you guys,” I growl. “We don’t really have time—”
“Jessa?” My mom’s voice breaks through from the other side of the door. “Is everything okay, honey?” she asks.
“Mom!” I call back. “I’ll be there in a couple of minutes.”
“Well, hurry up. Danny wants to treat you to ice cream.”
“Two minutes,” I promise her. “I’ll be right out.”
“I’ll be waiting in the car.”
“Okay.”
We all listen as her footsteps fade away down the hall.
I grind my teeth together and look at both of them. “Listen, you two. I’ve got enough to worry about without having to play referee here. And I don’t need either of you to play knight-in-shining-armor for me. Once I talk to Mario, I’ll have some more answers, and we can take it from there.”
Finn starts to open his mouth, and I shut that right down.
“Zip it,” I bite out. “I mean it. Now let’s go get some damn ice cream.”