“Fuck…” he murmured as his hand reached for the metal cuff on his ankle.
I wrapped my arms around my legs. “Your mom and Henry put that on.”
“January.” Justin’s eyes snapped open, and he shot up into a sitting position. His golden eyes found mine, and his lips parted as he stared. “What happened?”
“Do you remember last night?” I asked.
His gaze went distant. “Parts of it, but I don’t remember you. I escaped here and… left.”
“Left to fly to challenge a demon to a death match.”
His eyelids widened and lips parted, and the moment I saw his expression, I knew that he’d done all of that consciously. I had suspected as much, but seeing confirmation in the lines of his face, made the cold knot forming in my gut tighten.
“I was there.” I hugged my legs tighter. “Your mom hired Parker to find you, and Parker pulled strings to get me out of school and sneak me into that Pitchfork Clubhouse. I found you in that pit while that demon attempted to beat you to death. I asked a half-demon named Blaze to let you live, and he signaled the fighter in there with you to only knock you out. They let us go, and Parker drove us here. I forced your mom to tell me the truth.”
Fissures deepened across Justin’s brow as I spoke, and a look of terror grew in his citrine eyes. He stood from the bed and crossed toward me. His chains scraped over the wood floor, sounding like a massive snake slithering its way straight to me. When Justin was only feet away, I steadied my breathing and looked straight up into his eyes.
“What really happened, January?” His hands rubbed over his hair. “Shit. The strzyga demons were waiting outside the club. How did you get away?”
“We hit them with spells your mom gave Parker and fled.” I stared into his fathomless yellow eyes. “I’m so terrified, Justin—not because I owe a half-demon a favor, or because now these strzyga demons are after both of us. I’m terrified because I feel like I’ve already lost you.”
He shook his head, but I knew it was true. I wanted to believe that it was some other soul inside Justin at the wheel, forcing him to go to that club and fight. I wanted to believe that it was his out of control demon instincts—but it was Justin. It was the same Justin I knew. The Justin I knew had always been motivated by the instinct to protect those around him—so much that he would sacrifice anything for his friends, even their love and respect.
“You went to that deathmatch to die, didn’t you? You did it knowing the demons in there would kill you and throw your body out to the strzyga demons. The strzyga demons were waiting just outside for you, surrounding the clubhouse. You went there to die.”
He rubbed his jaw and looked away. “January… those demons plan to eat me alive unless I join them, and I’m not joining them.”
I stood and took the final step toward Justin. “Now the strzyga demons plan to kill me whether or not they get to you.”
The lines of Justin’s jaw sharpened as he glowered down. He gritted out, “What the fuck did my mother make you do?”
“What I’ll always do, Justin, protect you. I don’t understand what you’re going through, and yes, everything that happened tonight terrified me to my core. That doesn’t matter. If I think you’re in danger, I will always come after you whether we’re together or broken up.”
“Are we?” he asked quietly.
I shook my head, not understanding. “What?”
“Are we broken up?”
“No.” I squeezed my eyes shut. “I of all people know what it’s like to lose control of your instincts and do horrible things—I almost attacked an innocent girl tonight.”
I staggered back a step as the words truly sank in. Everything had been moving so fast that I hadn’t really processed what had happened last night in its entirety. After losing my blood supply and injuring myself, I had almost bitten Sam. If we had been alone in an alley together, and there had been no one to whisk her away, would I have done it? Justin’s crimes were, as ever, nothing compared to mine.
Justin was going through the same, awful journey I had. He was losing control of the magic inside him—but when he lost control, he protected people. When I lost control last night, I attacked.
I was looking at Justin as a threat all this week when I was a far greater threat. I peered up into his golden eyes, and with absolute surety, told him, “ I love you. I would never break up with you for turning into a demon—”
I cut off as Justin wrapped me in his arms. He was sweaty and covered in dried blood, and the scent enveloped me. Instead of repulsing me, I felt comforted. I sunk into his chest and wrapped up in his arms.
“I thought you were dead,” I admitted as I pressed my face into his skin. “For ten whole seconds, Justin, I truly believed that you were dead. My mind stopped working. I don’t think I could even put into words how it felt.”
His hand rubbed over my shoulder. “I wish I could undo every choice I made tonight.”
“Just never, ever do it again. Please. I need you to survive this.”
Suddenly, it was like a dam of emotion exploded inside me, relief and terror and longing. When Justin leaned down toward me, I went to my tiptoes and met his lips with mine. His mouth tasted spicy and sweet, and when his tongue plunged between my lips, I felt it all the way to my toes.
Our kisses were desperate as his hands went to the back of my ridiculous dress. He pulled the material over my shoulders, and I shimmied out of it. My underwear followed quickly, leaving me only in knee-high boots. My whole body thrummed with sensation, and my fingers went to the button of his jeans. His lips crashed down on mine again, and his hands helped me with his button.
“I need you too,” he whispered onto my lips. Justin eased his zipper down, revealing just how much he desired me at this moment.
My whole body tingled with want. “Yes. Now.”
Justin broke away, panting, and the moment he did, I leaned up toward his mouth. “Don’t go. Stay with me.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” Justin whispered as he reached for his back pocket and pulled out his wallet. He tugged out a condom package from the billfold and ripped it open. Justin shoved down his boxers and slid the condom on. Reaching down under my thighs, he lifted me off my feet before carrying me the few feet over to his bed. He sat and pulled me onto his lap, and I slid down onto him. The first time Justin and I were together was slow and careful, but this time was nothing like that. We were making a desperate declaration of our love, knowing that we almost lost each other tonight, and we weren’t even close to being out of danger yet. I gripped onto his shoulders, and he squeezed my hips as we moved together, never breaking our kiss.
Pleasure crashed through me, and I broke away and pressed my forehead into his. “I need you.”
“I love you,” he whispered back.
I grabbed both sides of his head. “I love you, and I need you to live.”
We stopped for a second, locked in one another’s gazes as my words hung between us.
“Promise me that you’re going to survive this, Justin,” I demanded.
He didn’t respond, and in his golden eyes, I could see the inner battle he was facing. Every day that he lived, others died.
“Promise me,” I begged. “We’ll find a way.”
He sighed. “I promise, January.”
I leaned in and kissed his sweet lips. We began to move again, but our movements slowed. Neither of us was in a rush to be disconnected from one another. Sensation built in my center each time he rocked up into me, and tingling pleasure exploded through my whole body. Justin moaned long and low onto my lips, and his eyes slid to half-lidded as he squeezed me down onto him.
We collapsed together on the bed in a sweaty, panting mess. Justin ran a hand over the rats’ nest that I knew my hair had turned into.
“I can’t believe we just did that when your mom could have walked in at any minute.” I glanced back toward the staircase. Hopefully this cellar was soundproof because neither Justin nor I were bei
ng quiet.
“My mom fully expects that we’re doing this every time we’re alone together,” Justin chuckled as he knotted up his condom and tossed it into the trashcan beside his bed. Then he stood and pulled up his boxers and jeans.
Instead of attempting to put my dress back on, I pilfered Justin’s dresser, stealing a pair of his boxers and one of his shirts. The boxers I rolled about ten times before they would fit me, and then I climbed back onto his lap.
With my fingers running through Justin’s short dark hair, I said, “Okay… we’re obviously not going to break up, but we have to be held accountable for the things we do when our instincts are out of control.”
“Like having sex a minute ago?” he asked, with his golden eyes sparkling with amusement.
“More like when you hit Mitch and broke up with me at that party before blacking out. I’m just taking a stab here, but I’m guessing that you were trying to protect us by sending us away from you—just like you’ve done with everyone else,” I said on a sigh. “Isn’t that what happened?”
He leaned back his head. “I honestly don’t know what happened that night, January. I wasn’t lying when I said that I blacked it out. Some hazy memories might be coming back to me…” He squeezed his eyes closed. “But that was the day my wings first emerged. All that day, Henry had been injecting me with spells and drugs that were supposed to keep me asleep through the agony, but I kept coming out of the sleep. I was in too much pain to take in what was around me, but I overheard my mother and Henry talking about the strzyga demons. It took me a while to remember what they said because of the spells, but they said that it was only a matter of time before the demons found people who knew me.”
Even in his haze, Justin’s instincts must have taken over, driving Justin from the bed and down to the party where he did what he always did to protect those he loved. He sacrificed his relationship with Mitch and me so he could take all of the risks on his own.
“Justin—I think I understand why you said all that you did. You were trying to protect me, and your demon instincts took over. But you can’t treat me like that—never again. We’re both standing at a knife’s edge with our supernatural instincts, and we need to take control of them before we hurt each other.” I burrowed my head into his chest and squeezed my arms around him. “Never sacrifice yourself again, Justin. We’re going to find another way.”
“The strzyga demons won’t stop killing people until I’m dead, January. But, even if that weren’t true, I can’t go back to living a normal life after this.”
“Why not? You just need to fake being human. I’ve been doing it for over a year.”
“I’m not sure if I still know how. Sunlight sears my eyes, and then there’s these...” There was a loud rustling, and Justin leaned in toward me. Giant wings erupted from his back. The feathers were gray and mottled, and the wings unfurled straight out of his shoulders and to the side, like owl wings.
“I thought that demon ripped them off?” I asked.
“It hurt more than having the demon rip them off in the first place, but my wings grew back. I can keep them hidden in my back, but it’s agony.”
I reached out toward the feathers, but pulled back my hand, remembering that his wings were his weakness now. “Sorry.”
“You can touch them, January. I’m not sure what that’ll feel like for either of us, but I like the idea.”
Slowly, I reached past his shoulder and ran my hand over the delicate feathers there.
Justin sucked in a breath, and his eyelids shuttered. “I can feel that.”
“Does it hurt?”
“No.” He leaned back and gave me a heated look that displayed just how much that didn’t hurt.
When I brushed my hands over the thick bone structure that sprouted from his shoulder blades, his breaths quickened. I ran my hand over the juncture where his back sprouted the thick bone, and Justin’s hands wrapped around my back and squeezed me to him. “You probably should stop that…”
“Does your wallet have any more—”
“No,” he said on a sigh.
“I’ll have to bring you a supply next time I visit. I might have some in my dorm room.”
He laughed, but his gaze travelled far away. “It’s only a matter of time until the strzyga demons find me here, January. All they need to do is track down someone who knows me and torture my location out of them—and now that they’ve seen us together, I’m terrified that their next target will be you.”
“You’re right. There’s no going back. We have to be who we are—and that’s Supernaturals with predatory instincts that’ll control us if we’re not careful.” I leaned into Justin’s ear. “What if we run away together out of the strzyga demons’ territory? That way, they’d leave Brightside without a fight.”
Justin leaned back. “I have no idea where their territory ends.”
“I know. It ends in Phoenix. It’s a demon neutral city.”
Justin stared off, his eyelids narrowing, then he gave his head one decisive shake. “No, January. We can’t leave your mother when the vampires are still after her.”
I closed the little bit of distance. “My father is the leader of Brightside coven again, and he’s ordered the vampires to protect my family.” I squeezed my arms around Justin’s shoulders. “You promised that we would find a solution that doesn’t involve you sacrificing yourself for all of us.”
Justin shifted, making his ankle chain scrape across the floor. “My mother has me chained in a basement. How do we escape?”
“Leave that to me…” I trailed off as I mentally started formulating a plan. “I now have a couple of friends who aren’t exactly playing by the Hawthorn Group’s rules.”
Justin’s hands slid up my back, making shivers travel over my skin. “Clearly, a lot has happened while I was locked in here. And, you say you owe a half-demon named Blaze a favor?”
“Don’t worry about him… I’m going to be a millionaire in a couple of days.” I gave Justin a light kiss on his lips. “We’re going to need it.”
Justin’s citrine eyes burned into mine. “What about Mitch?”
Justin’s question made my chest physically ache.
What about Mitch?
It was a good question. We would be abandoning him. Justin was the only family Mitch had left, and, for whatever reason, Mitch let me past the giant cement fortifications he had erected around himself. If we ran away and left Mitch alone in this world, it would be the deepest form of betrayal. But, taking him with us would be even more selfish.
Squeezing my eyes closed, I said what I knew I had to, “What happens when the strzyga demons find us? What happens if I get injured, and he’s next to me, and I don’t have easy access to blood? What happens if one of us loses control?”
“We would never hurt him—not seriously…” Justin pressed his forehead to mine, “And neither would you.”
I released a shaky breath. “You may never hurt him, Justin, but I might…”
“You have more control than that, January,” Justin insisted.
“It’s more than just that, Justin. Mitch told me that he’s leaving Brightside. He wants to leave this world, and he actually has a chance to do it. He’s human. He could have what you and I are never going to be able to have again, normalcy and safety. We’re never going to have that. The strzyga demons will always be a threat looming over us, and the Hawthorn Group will probably send out an APB declaring that I’m a dangerous fugitive. You and I will be running and fighting forever.” I bit my lip. “Mitch is your cousin. It’s not up to me to decide, but I really think that he’ll only ever be safe when he’s far away from us.”
The words felt like a betrayal to Mitch, but they were also true. The corruption of the world of the sabbatianoí was destroying Mitch, one alcohol bottle at a time. His brother murdered his sister, and Mitch would see no justice. He had been beaten and abused all his life, and yet, somehow, he still found it in him to protect others who needed it, even pi
eces of shit like Amber. But all of that came at a cost. He was destroying himself every moment that he stayed in this toxic hell. And, if he followed along with mine and Justin’s desperate escape, Mitch would more than likely end up dead or thrown in Alderwood —which, from what I’d been hearing— would be tantamount to the same thing.
Justin looked away. “You’re right.”
I ran my fingers through Justin’s short dark hair. “Are we really thinking about doing this?”
His eyes slipped closed. “So many things would have to happen to make this plan work, and I can’t help you with any of them.”
“I can handle it. I promise.” I leaned into his neck and whispered into his skin, “Do you know anywhere I can find a renewable blood supply?”
“Hmm…” Justin arched his neck. “That part is easy. But, there’s only one way to be sure it will work.” His hands squeezed around my thighs.
“You’re right.” I gently traced my lips over his soft skin. My mouth closed over his pulse, and he gasped as my fangs pierced into his flesh. Two beads of blood welled up, and the sweet taste filled my mouth, tingling over my tongue. Damn. The bagged fish juice I’d been sustaining myself on was incomparable to Justin’s delicious blood. A familiar warmth soothed my throat, but his wounds closed far before I was satisfied.
Justin growled, “Drink again.”
Oh, I wanted to. But I kissed his neck and whispered on his skin. “You’re still healing.”
A smirk twisted up his lips. “I’m one-hundred percent healed.”
I nuzzled into the side of his neck, inhaling his musky scent. “I wish I could stay with you all day, but I have to go see my mom during visiting hours. After all of that, I’ll sneak back in here, okay?”
Justin chuckled and rubbed his hands down my back. “I’ll be here.”
Yes, he would. He was literally chained to the basement floor.
“I hope your mom understands just how fucked up what she’s doing is.”
“I honestly don’t think my mother is capable of understanding that.” Justin’s wings tucked up against his back, folding against his skin. “If we’re going to run, it needs to be soon.”
Broken Elites (The Vampire Legacy Book 3) Page 17