“You better call her before she hears about it from Poe. She’s stubborn, but you know she’ll still worry about you.”
“After we speak to our prez and VP. I don’t want them on our asses, especially with how strained things have been between you and Chaos.”
“Bet,” I mutter, agreeing. Bear meets us in the middle of the road, and we catch up with the others, leaving in a big group. I begin to hear the faint wail of a police siren and thank my lucky stars we’re on our way out of here. The deputy must’ve owed Chaos big, for the cops to hold off for this long. We could’ve ended up in jail today, and Chaos managed to save my ass from it, while Ruin and Bear had my back so I wasn’t killed. This right here is exactly why the club is so damn important to me and why I’m determined to get my patch. Kings of Carnage is about true brotherhood, mutual respect for one another, and devotion to our families. Of course, it has its various businesses and hellion side where we party our asses off, but the core holds true to so much more.
We make it to the club, and it’s safe to say my bike has exterior damage as well as an oil leak. Jupiter shouldn’t have any issues fixing it back up for me, and knowing her, she’ll have it to me in no time looking fresh. The only downfall is the custom airbrush of my spades on it is ruined. Next time I’m out through Texas, I’ll have to get Dad’s guy to hook me up. Regardless of my sore spots, I’m grateful. Today could’ve went a lot worse than it did.
Dad and Chaos are outside smoking a cigarette, already waiting on us before we make it into the parking lot. We park in the usual spots, and Dad is beside me in the next beat. He pulls me off the bike and into his embrace. If you know my dad, you know he’s a hugger. He’s been like that for as long as I can remember. “Are you really all right? Don’t bullshit me, Sterling, I mean it.”
“Scratched up from the road, but I’m not shot. You know I’m stubborn. It’ll take a helluva lot more than a dip and some stray bullets to take me out,” I joke, not wanting to admit I was worried for a beat about getting shot in the back as I ran for cover.
He pulls back, firm grip on my shoulders. “Your mom is on her way. Figure you deserve to be prepared.”
“Shit,” I sigh, and he dips his chin, agreeing. Mom will be all over my ass about getting hurt and worrying her. Growing up, my father was protective of all of us, but that didn’t mean my mom wasn’t just as fierce. She has a habit of going rogue and telling us after the fact when she wants to handle something. It’s no surprise that my siblings and I are so different, considering our parents tend to always do whatever the fuck they want. I suppose I come by that trait naturally from them.
“Let’s get inside so you guys can fill us all in on what happened.” We head for the door and he says, “Took everything me and Chaos had to stay back and wait. I don’t think either one of us was expecting the club to be hit this much when you two would be getting patched in.”
“It’s not your fault.”
“I know that, but all of us have worked hard to bring stability and a sense of normalcy to the club. We wanted our families to be involved in our club life, but not touched by the bad shit. You know what I mean?”
“Yeah. You and the brothers have always made sure we were all protected. What’s happening lately, you can’t control that. None of us blame any of you.”
“I sure as fuck hope not.” He claps my shoulder and I cringe, sore. Half my shirt’s ripped off, along with some of the leather on my boots. I’m glad I had them on or I’d have been fucked up worse. I step inside and Dad curses. “You’re missing some skin on your back.”
I grunt. “Yeah. Fairly sure it’s like that in a few places.”
He hollers at the club ass to grab the bottle of alcohol, a towel, and some whiskey. If he’s planning on pouring that shit on my wounds then I’m toking up too; fuck just whiskey.
“If you’re pouring that on me, I’m going to go smoke first.”
“Your mom will want to fuss over you, you know how she is. You guys need to give us all the details before she gets to make you scream.”
He grins and I roll my eyes. That only happened one time and it wasn’t something little either. I’d been out screwing around by the train tracks. I’d lost my balance, fell, slit my leg open on some broken glass, and broke my fucking arm. Mom soaked my leg in alcohol, catching me off guard, while Dad checked my arm over. Pretty sure anybody that age would’ve screamed, not just me. Regardless, Stryker made fun of me because he was at that dipshit age all younger brothers seem to hit a time or two growing up.
We step into church, and before anyone has a chance to sit down, Chaos demands, “Give me everything that you’ve got on these motherfuckers! Going after my club and my kid, way to sign your death warrant.”
When your man is mad, call him ‘Baby Girl’ and tell him you can’t talk to him when he’s so emotional.
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I’m so fucked where my head and heart intersect, it’s not even funny. I slow my speed as I cruise past the smoothie shop, neck whipping side to side like I wasn’t nearly roadkill yesterday. Leigh’s car’s not there, and it’s the only thing I was looking for. I shouldn’t be riding my bike much with it still fucked up, but I can’t help but choose it over my car until it goes into the shop. I make the turn to head by her apartment next, even though I damn well know it’s the last place I outta be. I can still remember word for word the talk my father had with me again yesterday.
“You can’t be with her, Sterling. She’s not like other women around here. She’ll never be club ass.”
I glower in his direction at him insinuating I’d ever consider that option for Leigh. “You think I don’t know that?” Part of the reason I’ve stayed away is because I know she’s too good for what I could possibly offer her. She deserves so much more.
“Well, fuck, Sterling! Do you, son? Cause I’ve got my best friend pissed off at my ass for the first time in God knows how long, and it’s over you and his daughter! Hell, those kids have been family to me as well, and then you go and get shit twisted up.” He shakes his head, fists clenching. Dad isn’t known for his patience or easy temperament. He’s gotten his name from losing his shit and bashing in whatever’s within reaching distance. I’m used to his temper. He’s never come after me or my siblings, so it doesn’t frighten me, only alerts me to his mood.
“Of course, I know she’s special. Why do you think I want her?” The words leave me before I have a chance to reel them in and think. The last thing I need to do is go around spouting off that I have a hard-on for Leigh and how it feels like chewing glass to stay away from her.
He mutters, more to himself than me, “It had to be the prez’s daughter, of-fucking-course. Only my kids. First Stryker constantly testing me with his fighting, and then you, neck fucking deep into club shit when you should be worried about partying and fucking off at your age. Before I know it, Sawyer will be fucking pregnant. Your wreck and run-in with the other club have me rattled enough. Don’t need to add any more to it. Kids giving their old man a fucking stroke.”
I snort, rolling my eyes. “I’ll castrate any asshole that comes at her with his dick.” I don’t comment on the rest, well, because it’s true. Ruin and I have always been about doing whatever we could to get into Kings and be like our fathers. Stryker’s an ass always getting into shit, we all know it.
He chuckles a bit, then grows serious once more. “When I told you you’d find a good woman to change things someday, I didn’t mean right now. I sure as hell wasn’t nominating Leigh for that position either. You know Chaos will come for you over this? And what, Sterling, am I supposed to sit back and let him? You’re my kid and as much loyalty I have for the club, my family comes first, always. Chaos knows as much. I can still remember when he met Cambri. He said brothers before all others…until her. The same happened to me when I met your momma.”
I feel like utter dogshit with his words. I’m fucking everything up with th
is pull I have to Leigh. “I’m trying to stay away,” I eventually confess. “It’s harder than I thought it’d be.”
He nods. “As long as you’re trying to do the right thing, then I can support you. I’ve got your back, Ster, always. You just have to at least try.” He pulls me in for a tight hug, palm hitting my back but thankfully staying clear of my road burn. “I always have you, kid. Don’t forget as much.”
I nod into his shoulder, not realizing I’d needed his hug and affirmation over this sensitive topic so badly. With his support, I feel stronger. I always have. It’s strange how much weight a person’s words can have on another.
I shake off the conversation replaying in my head from the day before and notice Leigh’s car isn’t at her apartment either. She’s probably at her parents’, which is the last place I need to be right now. Chaos would see right through me if I showed up, knowing I was looking for her. At least I know she’s not alone with some douchebag and she’s safe. It’s enough to put me at ease, and I make the decision to head home instead of waiting her out.
I take the turn that’ll bring me to my trailer. I don’t live too far away from her. It wasn’t planned that way or anything, just happened that we live in a small town. The ride’s short and I’m pulling up to my place in no time. My car’s parked under the carport where it always is, and sitting parked right behind it is Leigh’s car. My brow furrows as I slow down, taking in the scene, and I drive past her car, pulling to a stop between my car and the trailer. I keep my bike tucked close so no one fucks with it.
“What are you doing here, Leigh?” I ask as soon as the rumble from my motorcycle quiets, my voice a bit gruffer than she deserves. I climb off my bike and unclip my helmet, staring anywhere but directly at her. She’s standing propped against her car, arms crossed snugly over her voluptuous chest. She’s wearing an expression between worry and anger. I don’t like either one of those emotions on her, especially when it seems I may be the reason for them.
I stride towards the front door and impatiently ask again, “Leigh? Why are you here?” I pause, turning to momentarily meet her eyes before heading up the rickety stairs that I still haven’t fixed. I can’t spend too much time around her. I’m supposed to be doing the right thing here, and it doesn’t help to have her showing up at my place. She needs to leave so I can keep us both out of the doghouse.
“I’m here because I’m angry!”
It’s cute how she nearly sounds intimidating. I’m sure she would be to some, but I’ve known her for far too long to allow her tantrum to get to me. I huff out a dejected chuckle, as she has no reason to be pissed off. I’m the only one here that possesses that right. “That’s rich coming from you. I’m fucking angry too,” I shoot back, nostrils flaring. “You need to leave before you get me killed, before you push me too far.”
Her lip wobbles and tears crest. I don’t know what to do with her when she’s like this. Everything in me goes on high alert and demands that I protect her. She asks, her pitch caked with emotion, “How can you joke like that? Hm?” A tear falls over her cheek.
My brows drop, confusion overtaking me. We must not be talking about being angry over the same thing. I push it aside and warn, “I’m not joking. Chaos or Ruin, hell, even my father will kill me if I go near you again. You need to get out of here.” She stomps towards me, stopping to shove me with both hands. I rock, nearly losing my balance, and my arms shoot out to grab her. “The fuck, Leigh? Stop your shit already. I’ve had enough of it.” First the fits at the studio, then her deceiving me, and now her attitude. I don’t deserve this from her. Nor am I used to it. She’s always been so calm and levelheaded, it’s like she’s gone ass backward lately.
She pounds her fist to my chest. “Ugh, you’re so frustrating, Sterling Spade! I heard what happened in town. How you were shot at and rode after them, how you were nearly killed! Then you go and talk about death like it’s nothing. Well, news flash, Sterling, it’s something! There’s enough bad in this world already…” She trails off a beat before whispering, “Don’t make me picture it without you in it. I don’t want to exist in a place where you don’t.” Tears coat her cheeks now, and it feels like something crumbles in my chest at her words.
I cup her cheeks, my thumbs moving to swipe away her tears. “Fuck, Leigh,” I whisper, and then she’s shooting up on her tip-toes, her mouth meeting mine. I could fight it. I should. Hell, I’m supposed to, but I don’t. I want her too fucking badly to turn her touch away right now, if ever.
I hold that beautiful woman right there in front of me and take her mouth like a dying man seeking his last breath. I was so angry at her—I still am, for what she pulled at the studio—but the need to comfort her overrides anything else right now. Her hands bunch my shirt in her grip, while her mouth gives me everything I’m seeking and more.
She’s so much more than I’ll ever deserve, more than I can ever imagine having.
She’s not mine.
She won’t be, not ever.
“Leigh,” I murmur against her lips, drawing back. “We can’t do this. We aren’t able to be together right now.” I keep repeating the words silently and aloud. I need to beat them in deep so I stop this madness between us. There’s no hope of the two of us ending up together in any of this. One of us, if not both, will only get hurt with it all.
“Please, Sterling, please. I need to feel you, to make sure you’re okay. Show me that you’re all right, that you’re alive and here with me now. I want you.”
Everything screams at me to walk her to her car and tell her good-bye, but I can’t. I sigh, more to myself, “I hate the way I always miss you.” Taking her hand, I lead her up the stairs and inside. I close and lock the door behind us and tug her to the couch. I sit, legs spread wide, not sure how to make her see that I’m okay. “Sit, Boo,” I order, expecting her to plop down beside me or maybe perch on the edge since she’s upset. Rather, she climbs right on my lap, thighs moving to straddle my hips. Her juicy round ass lands on my jean-clad cock, resting there, teasing me not to get hard.
My hands move to grip her sides while hers rest on the couch behind me. “What are you doing?” I ask, knowing I should just keep my damn mouth shut for once. She leans in, peppering soft kisses under each of my eyes, the tip of my nose, my chin, and then my mouth. She kisses me tenderly, drawing each of my lips between hers to suck until eventually, our tongues meet. This chick makes my head spin already, and throw in the touching and tasting and I’m a goner. My hands slide to her back, wanting to feel as much of her as I can without overdoing it and pushing her further. She’s so goddamn sweet.
Her body shifts, causing me to groan. “You gotta be careful,” I warn.
“Why?” She peers at me, a sweet bit of innocent curiosity staring back at me in her irises.
“‘Cause, you’re sitting on my lap and moving around. I’m attempting to be a gentleman here, Leigh.”
Her eyes widen, a smile curling her lips. “Oh, you mean because of this?” she asks, shifting her hips forward and back, rubbing her core over my hardening length. She’s a sinful tease and she damn well knows as much.
“Fuck,” I whisper the curse, my hold tightening to get her to be still. “You can’t do that, not when I’m not allowed to have you like I want you. You know our families don’t want us to be together.”
Her nose slowly nudges mine as her hips rock side to side, driving me wild. I try to think of anything to keep my dick limp, but it’s no use when it comes to Leigh. “How about I do something else?” she asks, and my brows shoot to my hairline. Her hands move, and in a flash she’s got her top off, tossed onto the floor behind her. It’s official, this woman is trying to be the death of me.
The pad of my finger lightly trails over the globes of her breasts encased in her lacey bra. The touch is teasing, eliciting goose bumps to kiss her flesh. “Mm,” she hums, reaching behind her to unclasp her bra. The elastic releases, then she’s yanking it off and throwing it, baring her beautiful, lush tits
. I swear she has the prettiest set of titties I’ve ever seen before. “I’ve fantasized of you for far too long to care what anyone not in this room thinks. I don’t give a damn what any of them want. I want you.”
Her words do something, striking a chord deep. Hearing she’s thought of this for years…How have I not noticed before? Were my blinders on that much or was she simply good at hiding her true feelings from me for so long? “Magnificent,” I mutter, watching as my thumb rubs circles around her silver dollar nipples and they harden to pert peaks. I’m going to taste her there and anywhere else she’ll allow me to.
“Kiss me, Sterling,” she commands. I eagerly obey, knowing it’s wrong, but it feels right regardless.
Leaning my head to her chest, I begin by placing kisses between the valley of her breasts then explore under each globe, nipping the tender flesh and making her squirm. Eventually, I make my way to each nipple, pushing her tits together. I lavish them with my tongue and light bites. She has no idea how incredibly beautiful she is, especially in my eyes. Her hips rock forward and back, my cock growing harder with each pass of her center. The feelings are dizzyingly good. My mouth moves upwards, licking as I go until I can suck and kiss on the silky smooth flesh of her throat. I hit a hot spot as her hand flies to my hair, griping enough to give it a bit of a tug as she moans and grinds against me.
“Damn,” I sigh, nearly panting and still fully clothed. “We have to stop,” I repeat, knowing we’re about to go past the point of no return for me. I’ll be coming in her or in my pants, that much I’m sure of if we don’t pump the breaks and I grab a cold shower.
“I don’t want to stop. Please?” she asks sweetly, pulling back to meet my heated gaze. “I want this and I want you.” Her words are the confirmation I need, and I can’t get naked fast enough. Standing, I lay her on the couch and snap my jeans open, shoving them down as I pull my cut off and fold it to the side. My shirt’s removed last, tossed somewhere in the room without a second thought.
Sterling: Kings of Carnage MC - Prospects (Kings of Carnage - Prospects Book 2) Page 10