by Starr, Faith
That sounded insecure.
I am insecure.
He doesn’t need to know that.
True.
Realistically speaking, my behavior over the last half hour probably mimicked his groupies’ requests. Nonetheless, for my own peace of mind I wanted to make the distinction clear.
He froze over me. “You are in no way, shape, or form, the same as the women I meet on the road.”
It might have been meant as a compliment and satisfied my moral compass, but his words stung because soon enough he’d be back on the road with those same slutty women. Defensiveness kicked in.
“Do you say that to all of them?”
“No. I’m saying it to you. Don’t confuse the two.” He pushed hair behind my ear. “Now, can we please get back to the part about me fucking you?”
He was such a man—his mind on one thing and one thing only. I got a kick out of it, causing my defensiveness to take a hike.
“Mighty demanding rock star, aren’t you?”
“And spoiled too.”
He kneed my thighs farther apart, and his hand drifted between them. His eyes followed the movement of his fingers as they glided between my folds. He slipped two inside me, using a gentle up and down motion. My hips matched their tempo and speed.
Aah.
My eyes locked tight but the rest of my body relaxed into the mattress. He removed his fingers which caused my eyes to open and my mind to ask why. He bought them to his lips and licked them clean.
“Mmm. Best appetizer I’ve ever had.”
My cheeks warmed tenfold.
“So much so, I think I’ll have seconds. Bring your sweet ass up here.”
What did he mean?
He must’ve sensed my confusion because he elaborated. “I want your mouth on my dick and your pussy up here.” He pointed to both to better get his point across.
How humiliating that I needed clarification.
Feeling a bit uncomfortable, I shifted.
“Come on, baby, you’re moving like a sloth. Do you not realize how hot you are? Look at me right now.” He stroked his length.
“I think a cool breeze would have that effect on you.”
“What? Just for that, I’m going to torture you.”
“Torture me?”
“Yup. I’m going to drag out letting you come. You’re going to have to earn your orgasm.”
“Bring it on,” I challenged.
“I damn well will. Now, put that delectable pussy of yours over my mouth. Chop-chop.” He clapped. “The clock is ticking.”
His teasing led me to forget all about the compromising position he placed me in. My speed didn’t work for him so he took matters into to his own hands.
I concentrated on the texture of his shaft as I licked a path to the tip, the skin smooth under my tongue, intriguingly different from the ridges it had explored a second ago. He graced me with a sample of his yummy flavor.
“I think you’re the one torturing me.” My lips curled up against him. Not usually one to swallow, I couldn’t wait to taste every drop Ryan fed me.
My palm got involved in the fun. I cupped the delicate flesh underneath, only to take one of his balls in my mouth.
These actions lessened my inhibitions. I didn’t understand why. But they did.
Engaging in a sixty-nine was new for me. I had to admit it was quite fun.
He got into his own groove by steadying my hips over his face, his tongue not wasting a second to probe my entrance. The man was insatiable.
“Suck me.”
Oh yeah. I had forgotten.
I fisted him, lubing him up with the moisture beading at the tip. My mouth added more. I rolled my tongue over the head then down the underside, glorying in the veiny texture, ending again at the base where I cupped his sac in my mouth.
He moaned.
After spreading me wider, he darted his tongue in and out of me. He swirled it over my clit. The poor man was probably suffocating because my pelvis begged for more by burying itself over him.
He sucked. I sucked.
He laved. I laved.
It became a synchronized dance without prescribed steps. We moved to our own beat yet had perfect timing, craft, leading, and following.
Stars danced behind my eyelids, my body light as if gliding.
All movement on his part came to a halt.
Wait, what?
“Not so fast. Remember?”
“You are cruel!” He couldn’t see my scowl.
His dick shook in front of my mouth, and his body vibrated with the chuckle he blessed me with. Tease!
“How bad do you want it, Lizzie?”
“Bad.”
“How bad?”
He had to know this was difficult for me.
“Tell me exactly what you want me to do to you.”
No response.
“Don’t get all bashful on me again.”
“You don’t need instructions. You were doing an excellent job.”
“And here I thought you were trying to tame my big ego.”
“As I told you the other day, in bed, you’re entitled to it. Now how about continuing what you were doing?” My hand encouraged him by tapping his thigh.
He laughed again.
Before I could reply, his tongue lapped over my clit, making me jerk, my body picking up right where it had left off.
My mouth picked up where it had left off too. I drew a line up his rigid length with my tongue, then got ambitious and took him in his entirely. I circled my tongue over his sensitive tip.
That was all it took. Warm salty fluid shot into my mouth. He had tried to be a gentleman by tugging on my hair to give me fair warning, but I wanted none of that.
I shifted off him and rolled onto my back to give the guy air. He smoothed his hand over my leg.
“Screw dinner. Now I’m full.” He sighed with contentment.
“Silly man.”
We ended up ordering in Italian—baked ziti instead of pizza. Seeing and smelling the sauce and cheese enticed my senses, kicking my appetite back into gear.
“What kind of movie should we watch? A comedy, mystery, or horror? I’m not a big fan of horror,” he said while scrolling through the channels on the television.
“Me neither. Hey, you left out a genre.”
“I did?” He cocked his head to the side and ceased clicking the remote. We were sitting next to each other on the couch.
“Yup. Romance.”
“Nah, that was intentional.” The clicking resumed.
“Fine. How about a comedy then?”
“New or old?”
“I have no preference because I rarely go to the movies these days.”
“The guys and I have a ritual of watching 80s flicks on the bus.”
“80s flicks? That’s cute.”
“Cute?”
“Yeah. You have your own movie night thing. I think that’s cute.”
“We do have a ritual movie night thing, but I don’t consider it cute. Macho, maybe, but definitely not cute.”
“Got it. Not cute. Studly. Is that better?”
“Much.”
So easily pacified.
“I’m game for watching an 80s flick unless you save that for your bandmates. Out of curiosity, why the 80s?”
“It’s a funny story. Well, to me and the guys it is. You can decide for yourself. The guys and I were having dinner at Jonas’s. It was a gathering of all the parents. They wanted to have a family powwow before the guys and I hit the road. Not that we were going to follow their rules. But we let them have their moment and pretended to listen to what they had to say.
We ordered pizzas and ate ‘em up. When Jonas’s mom brought out dessert, she asked if anybody wanted coffee. Most of the adults did. Nick’s father asked for a refill, to which his wife replied, ‘Mike never has a second cup of coffee at home.’ The other adults followed suit by spewing out other lines from Airplane. You’ve seen it, right?”
&n
bsp; “Sure have.”
“Well, when the parents found out the guys and I had never seen it, they demanded we watch it right then and there. Personally, I thought it was dumb. But I get what the rave is all about. When it was over, they told us about other 80s movies we had to see: Breakfast Club, Ferris Bueller, of course, Gremlins, and Die Hard, along with countless others.
The guys and I appeased them by telling them that if and when we ever made it big, we would make it a point to watch all the 80s movies we had missed out on because we would have plenty of time on a tour bus. The irony is, we love most of the films we’ve seen and now watch our favorites repeatedly, citing lines ourselves now. And the best part is the movies never get old.”
“I agree it’s a funny story. Did you ever think you’d become as big as you are now?”
“None of us did. We dreamed it. Our parents begged us to have backup plans in case music didn’t pan out. We believed we had to get heard. Staying home, living with our parents, wasn’t going to make that happen. Playing local gigs was fun and all but it wasn’t enough. We needed exposure. So we got in Mason’s truck and hit the road, performing in various cities. We earned barely enough money to get by. At one of our shows, Steam’s band members happened to be sitting at a table having drinks. What are the odds?”
“I’d say nil.”
“Right? Hence, the fate thing. We had no idea they were in the crowd until after we finished our set. Joey, Logan, and Trevor approached us. It totally blew my mind. I mean, these guys are the real deal. We ended up hitting it off and hung out until the bar closed.”
“That does sound like fate.”
“Tell me about it.”
“So in a sense, Steam discovered you.”
“A hundred percent. We will never be able to thank them enough for all they’ve done to help us. Before we took off that night, they invited us to their soundcheck the following day. They fucking invited us to play with them too.”
His entire face lit up. His excitement got me hyped up as well.
“During their concert?”
He shook his head. “Don’t I wish. During their soundcheck which was an honor in itself. And guess who happened to be in the arena without us knowing?”
I had no idea. “Who?”
“Their manager. Again, fate. Joey introduced us, and the rest is history. Camilla is now our manager too. We got to open for Steam, which helped boost our popularity to the point we’re headlining our own shows. If someone would have told me this was how we were going to make it, I never would’ve believed it.”
“It does sound far-fetched and highly improbable. Do you still speak to the members of Steam?”
“We admire them. Wouldn’t be where we are without them. So yes, we keep in touch. If we’re in the same town, we’ll hook-up and play, do guest appearances at each other’s shows, you know, stuff like that.”
“Crazy how things work out, huh?”
Like meeting Ryan at the center. Had that been fate too?
“I agree. Now, back to movie selection. Have you seen Weird Science?”
“On regular TV. If I have a choice, I’d prefer Beetlejuice. I haven’t seen it in forever.”
“Beetlejuice? I thought you don’t like horror flicks. That has spirits and shit. You might get nightmares.”
His teasing made me giggle. “It’s not Poltergeist. Now that movie gave me nightmares. Every time the cable went out, I shut off the television. These days they don’t get staticky, but still. ‘They’re here.’ Oh my God.” I shivered. “Merely thinking about it creeps me out. I’m sticking with my guns. ‘Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice.’”
He covered his ears. “You’re not supposed to say that.”
“Now, now. You’re not afraid of a little bio-exorcist in a black and white suit, are you?”
“I am. I might need some comforting.”
“Not to worry. I’ll protect you.”
“Sold. I’ll put it on.”
We cuddled on the sofa, my head resting on his lap, the two of us watching Michael Keaton create havoc. I especially loved Winona Ryder’s character, Lydia. She rocked it.
Unfortunately, the movie didn’t have its usual spark to keep me intrigued because the next thing I knew, it was morning. “Shit!”
Ryan jerked underneath my head. “What? What’s wrong?”
I had woken him from a deep sleep, startling him.
“We fell asleep. I have to go home to get dressed for the center.” I also never texted Nikki to let her know I wouldn’t be home. I’d definitely hear shit for that one.
“Oh, man. I was out like a light.” He stretched his arms behind him. I sat up on the couch.
“You must have slept horribly.”
He was sitting in an upright position. It must have been so uncomfortable for him.
“On the contrary, I slept great. I had you here.”
Ryan: the heartbreaker of all heartbreakers.
He nudged me off him so he could rise. “Let me wash up, and I’ll drive you home.”
“Sounds good.”
“Wanna shower?”
“I’ll shower at my place. If I take one with you, I’ll be late for work.”
“This is true.”
We brushed our teeth and washed our faces, then he took me home. Nikki was making breakfast in the kitchen when I entered.
“Nice of you to let me know you weren’t coming home last night. Respect is mutual in this house. Don’t forget that.”
I deserved her anger.
“I apologize. I didn’t intend to sleep out. Ryan and I fell asleep watching a movie and didn’t wake up until this morning. You know I would have reached out.”
“Spending lots of time with the rock star, aren’t you?”
“He’s on a tour break so we’re trying to make the best use of it.”
“Better be careful. Guys like him don’t settle down. They’re players.”
That’s where she was wrong. In my heart, I knew Ryan wasn’t playing me. Not with his respectful behavior and the kind words he said to me. I seriously doubted he treated groupies with such consideration.
“I don’t mean to cut you off, but I have to get showered and dressed for work. I’m running late as it is.”
“Very well. Next time, don’t forget to call or text if you plan on sleeping out.”
Hello? Had I not specifically told her I had fallen asleep at Ryan’s and hadn’t intended on a sleepover? What part of that sentence did she not comprehend?
Whatever. I had to get ready for work.
The day carried on at a snail’s pace. I couldn’t wait to go on vacation with Ryan.
Wanting to get the dreaded task over with, I drove to my dad’s house after leaving the center to give him rent money. I prayed he wouldn’t be there.
The grass hadn’t been mowed in ages. Figures. The image my mind conjured up about the condition of the inside was disturbing.
Not wanting to enter, I knocked. Sure, I had lived in the piece of shit, but I had never once considered it home sweet home. It was a dwelling I resided in until I could get out.
“Elizabeth. Why didn’t you use your key? You made me get up from my Lazy Boy for nothing.”
Heaven forbid my father be put out of his way or inconvenienced.
“Here’s the money.” I handed him the envelope with the cash in it. He snatched it out of my hand, the ungrateful bastard.
“Don’t you want to come in and have a drink?” He chuckled and stepped aside.
Jerk.
“No, thanks. It was nice seeing you. Please don’t call again.” I stalked toward my car and gave him a backward wave.
“Aw, come on. Don’t be so sensitive. I was kidding.”
Sure you were.
It baffled me how I still gave him power over my emotions. What a blessing I had plans with Hailey for dinner. I had intentionally scheduled to meet up with her following my visit with my dad because I knew I’d need an emotional intervention.
>
“He took the money and had the gall to offer me a drink. Grrr. He infuriates me.”
“Why did you give him anything? You’re enabling him. You know that as well as I do.”
“I know. I know. I told him it was a one-time deal.”
“You’re in denial, girlfriend, if you believe that’s going to stop him from asking again.”
Hailey spoke emphatically with a slight raise of her brows.
My plan had backfired. Hailey only had a piece of my current puzzle. Most of the story was missing. My secrets were bubbling to the surface, dying to come out. I prayed my staycation with Ryan would help me put things back into perspective and kick my motivation into gear because I was starting to lose it, and fast. Lying by omission was doing a number on my intestines as well as my heart. It hurt to withhold information. It went against my spiritual principles of honesty and trust.
Ryan picked me up early Friday morning. I was bursting at the seams with excitement, beyond ready for a change of scenery.
“You didn’t forget your bathing suit, did you?”
“Nope. I’ve got it,” I assured him.
“Hope it’s not a one piece.”
His comment wasn’t a joke.
“It’s your lucky day. I brought a bikini.”
“Now that’s what I’m talking about. And for the record, I do consider myself lucky because I’ll have you all to myself for the next two days.” He pulled me into his arms for a romantic kiss. “Shall we head to the resort?”
How could he be so unaffected by that kiss? I was breathless. Hopefully, we’d have plenty of opportunities at the hotel to act out on the creative thoughts floating through my mind.
“We shall. I’ve been counting the minutes.”
“Me too.”
He kissed me again, then assisted me into his car. The man was being a tease without even realizing it.
It took about forty-five minutes to get to our destination. And damn, Ryan had gone all out. I hadn’t expected him to put us up at a five-star resort.
He parked, and a valet attendant took the car from us. Ryan collected our bags, and we went inside to check in.
He scanned the lobby. “What do you think?”
“It’s beautiful. I would’ve been happy going anywhere, though. All this extravagance is a bonus but was unnecessary.” I waved to the area around us: the marble floors, the ornate fixture hanging overhead, the leather couches placed sporadically throughout the large space, along with the full-service bar in front of the wall-to-ceiling windows.