Her blonde brows pulled together. “It’s been days, though. You guys have never not spoken for that long.”
“I know.” I sighed, eyeing some or other puff on the platter. It looked good, but my stomach rebelled at the idea of eating it. “He’s really angry, and he’s shutting me out totally.”
Haley speared another bite of fish with her fork, then glanced at my plate. “Have you eaten at all? You’re looking thinner. I’m worried about you.”
“I’ve eaten. Just not much.” I tugged my lower lip between my teeth, closing my eyes when I felt tears stinging the backs of them. “I can’t seem to stomach the thought of eating a huge plate of food when neither of them are talking to me.”
“Lincoln has no reason to be upset with you, though,” she pointed out. “You were the one who faced the brunt of your father’s anger when he found out about the two of you. What does he have to be angry about?”
“I wish I knew, but I just don’t. I’ve asked, obviously, but he hasn’t said a word in return.” My gaze drifted to the happy people around us. I felt a total disconnect from them. It was like I was eating lunch at the same spot but in a parallel universe where I could only be on the outside looking in. “I should’ve listened to you when you warned me about him.”
Haley stopped chewing and swallowed hard, lifting her hands as she shook her head. “Don’t jump to conclusions. Firstly, because it’s not like you. Secondly, because this doesn’t sound to me like the usual shit the military guys pull.”
“Why not?” I pulled my head back, the corners of my mouth turning down. “Disappearing into thin air is exactly what they do, isn’t it? When they’re done with you, they just vanish.”
She shrugged, but uncertainty flickered in her soft brown gaze and the slight wrinkling of her nose. “Sure. From experience and from what we’ve heard, that seems to be their modus operandi, but something about the way all this went down and the timing just doesn’t feel right.”
“Yeah, I agree about the timing thing, but what else could it be?” I’d been racking my brain for days but hadn’t really come up with a plausible explanation.
The last time he’d gone radio silent was when he’d gone on that mission, but it wasn’t like he could be on another one. While I still didn’t know what had happened, I sure as hell doubted Linc had been sent into the midst of battle right now.
I might not know the other superior officers, but I did know my father. If his attitude toward Lincoln was anything like how the others felt about him, that guy was going to be on suspension for a long, long time.
“Maybe you try talking to your father again,” Haley suggested, pulling me back to the here and now. “Try reasoning with him. If you can’t, maybe just ask him to tell you whether Lincoln is okay.”
I nodded but rolled both lips into my mouth as I thought. “I’ve tried asking him that before, but you’re right. I should try again. On the other hand, if Linc has decided he’s done with me, I don’t want to be the creepy, clingy ex-fling that doesn’t know how to take a hint.”
She made a sound of disgust at the back of throat, then pointed toward me with the cocktail in her hand. “If he doesn’t have the balls to tell you it’s over like a real man would, he can’t label you as anything. Let alone a creepy clinger.”
“That’s how we see it, but it might not be how he sees it.”
Bringing her drink to her lips, she took a long sip and swallowed it slowly. When she brought her eyes to mine again and sat back in her chair, the uncertainty from before had given way to something much harder.
“I don’t give a damn how he sees it. You fell for him and he was there when it was happening. It’s not right to spend that much time with someone and then just disappear on them. If trying to find out the truth makes you a clinger, then he’s just going to have to deal with it.”
A fissure opened up in my heart. I really didn’t want to believe that was what was going on, but I was at a loss for what else it could be. Except, of course, for one other possibility. “Okay, but what if it’s got something to do with my dad? What if he threatened him to stay away from me?”
“Do you really think he would do that?” she asked. Hurt flashed in her eyes. “If he knew you were really happy with Lincoln, do you honestly think he would force him to stay away from you?”
Another thing gnawing at my insides was the fact that I knew Dad would do anything to keep Lincoln away from me. Regardless of how much Haley and I both loved him, I didn’t think it’d be above him.
“I don’t want to say yes, but it’s my honest answer. You didn’t see the way he reacted to the news. I’ve never seen him like that. Whatever happened during that last incident that involved Lincoln took my dad from disliking him to believing he’s the damn devil.”
“It’s that bad?” Haley’s voice was soft now. This conversation was obviously hurting her. She’d always had the utmost respect for my dad, and they were so alike that I had no doubt a part of her was taking it personally.
But as much as I adored my father, too, he was in the wrong this time. “It’s that bad. He really believes there is and can be nothing good about Lincoln. He thinks he’s dangerous and that the only person he ever thinks about is himself.”
“Could he be right?”
I shook my head firmly. “No, he’s not right. Whatever is going on right now, I know for a fact that he has a good heart. He cares deeply about his job and the other SEALs. He just has a different approach than the very militaristic, old-school approach favored by those in charge.”
“But doesn’t that make him dangerous?” She held up a hand when I opened my mouth. “Just hear me out. I’m not saying I agree with the old-school approach. I’m just saying that it’s been that way for years and years. There’s a reason it is that way and always will be.”
“Sure, but can it really be said that if someone gets the job done but plays by their own rules that they’re dangerous?”
As we debated, I suddenly realized that I believed wholeheartedly in my argument. Haley, on the other hand, was obviously on the fence. I knew she was only being a soundboard for me to reason it all out, though. Playing devil’s advocate was an integral part of that, and I appreciated the role she was playing.
“I don’t really know what would constitute someone being dangerous to their teammates, but yeah, I’m willing to venture a guess that a person who disregards the rules could be.”
“He doesn’t disregard the rules, though.” I didn’t have to think. “It’s more that he interprets them a little more liberally than the rest of us.”
“Potato, potahto.” She frowned before releasing a soft sigh. “Look, I’m not saying he is dangerous, but let’s accept your father’s argument for a minute. Do you want to be with someone who might put you in danger?”
“Lincoln would never, ever put me in any danger. I know, believe, and trust him with everything I have inside me.” Passion fueled my words, and I felt the resolve that had been slowly trickling away from me during his absence returning with a vengeance. “I might not know where he is or why he’s being quiet, but I know for a fact that he isn’t a danger to me or to anybody else.”
My cheeks flushed and my chin lifted higher as the resolve built in my chest. “Maybe he plays fast and loose with the rules sometimes. Maybe he makes them up as he goes along and does what he thinks is best in any given situation, but I know he would never do anything that would result in anybody getting hurt.”
“Are you included in that anybody?” she asked, the corners of her mouth tipping up. “Because if you are and he’s not ghosting you to hurt you, then where the hell is he?”
“That’s what I plan on finding out.”
Haley’s smile widened. “There’s my girl. I almost didn’t recognize you for a minute there.”
“Thanks for making me realize that I couldn’t keep sitting back anymore. I know it’s only been a few days, but I really shouldn’t have been having a pity party because no one would speak to me.”
/>
“That’s what friends are for.” She scooted forward on her chair and propped her elbows on the counter, rubbing her palms together like an evil villain coming up with a plan might. “So what are we going to do? Should we go to Lincoln’s house first? Maybe we can catch him there and demand answers.”
“I’ve tried that. He’s not there. I went to the hotel he used to stay at, too. No dice.” Frustration hardened my voice. “Where else could I try? Any ideas?”
“One,” she said, amusement flashing in her eyes. “Maybe your dad shipped him off overseas.”
It was meant to be a joke, but something clicked into place in my head. “Maybe not overseas, but what if Dad had him shipped off somewhere for real?”
Haley’s amusement vanished in an instant and her eyes widened to the point that I could see the whites all the way around her irises. “Do you really think so?”
“I don’t know, but I have to speak to my dad. He’s been avoiding me, and I think we might just have figured out why.”
Chapter 33
Lincoln
The sour smell of old stale sweat and piss hung heavily in the air in my holding cell. It invaded my nostrils every time I took a breath.
Fluorescent lighting hummed above my head, flickering more than it actually provided light. My shoes scuffed across the smooth concrete floor as I paced. Black lines from rubber soles and nicks in the concrete told me I wasn’t the first one unable to sit still in there.
The windows had thick bars in front of them, like we were all hardened criminals who were going to try our hands at escaping. The sting of the handcuffs they’d slapped on me days ago still burned at my wrists, but I was pretty sure I was just imagining it at this point.
With my mood flipping violently from extreme to extreme, I was shitty company to anyone who had the misfortune of being dumped in this cell with me. Lucky for them, they came and went within hours.
I was the only one who had occupied this hellhole consistently in the time I’d been there. Thousands of questions sped through my mind, but no one was around to answer them.
The guards were built like solid bookshelves and had the personality of them, too. During my first day, I kept expecting someone to come talk to me. I’d gotten all the facts straight in my head and was more than ready for my statement to be taken.
Unfortunately for me, no one seemed interested in taking it. The guards refused to answer any of my questions, though one had told me the officers would come by when they were “goddamned ready” to.
The cot in the cell was made of metal rungs that dug into my ass when I sat and my back when I tried sleeping. The thin, threadbare mattress and blanket they had generously provided didn’t do shit to help with the discomfort.
And this was coming from someone who was used to sleeping under far worse conditions than this. I’d slept on surfaces ranging from concrete floors just like this one to sand under the stars in faraway lands, and not once had it kept me from getting in at least a few hours.
This time, however, I wasn’t so lucky. I’d tried the floor, but it was my mind keeping me from really getting much sleep more than my surroundings. I could’ve dealt with everything, but the one thing I wasn’t doing well with was not being able to tell Sofia where I was.
God only knew what she was thinking at this point, but I doubted it was good. My only hope was that she knew me well enough by now to know that I hadn’t just left her behind without a word.
The woman consumed my every thought. Even those concerning my future in the Navy.
Whatever happened from there on out, she would play a role in the decisions I made. If having this time to think had done anything good for me, it was that I’d realized I couldn’t let her go. I knew she had to go back to campus to finish her studies, and I was hopeful that once this shit show was over, I’d be deployed again.
But as far as I was concerned, neither of those things dictated our future together. Because we would fucking have one.
We had to.
As unlikely as it might be, I was absolutely and unequivocally in love with her. No one and nothing would keep us apart. Unless of course, she didn’t want to be with me, in which case I’d have to drown myself in a vat of whiskey like every other heartbroken man did before he figured out what the hell to do with himself next.
If, however, she did want me, I would apply every ounce of focus I had to our relationship. My missions had taught me that nothing was impossible if I applied myself, and that was exactly what I would do.
Body, mind, and soul, I would dedicate myself to her, to being better for her and to prove to Charles that I wasn’t the piece of shit he thought I was. But he and I needed to have a conversation first. The only thing that would keep me from breaking his fucking jaw in so many places that he had to take his meals through a straw for the rest of his life was that I needed him to be able to speak for said conversation.
Also, he was still Sofia’s dad. If I maimed him, it probably wouldn’t win me any points with her. First, though, I needed to get the fuck out of there.
Grunting in frustration as I balled my fists for what had to be the millionth time since I’d been thrown in there, I screwed my eyes shut and tried to channel some semblance of calm.
My attempt was shattered when keys clattered at the lock, and I heard the guards ordering someone into my cell. I wrenched my eyes open to see a mountain of a man stumbling in as they shoved him to my side of the gate.
My new cellmate’s head was shaved clean and tattoos crept out from under his collar. He had to be at least seven feet tall and had eyes as black as night.
Both middle fingers were thrust up at the guards, and a string of curses that echoed my own sentiments flew from his lips.
The bigger guard scowled at him. “Shut it, Dave. It’s not my fault you’re back here.”
Dave smirked and made another, much more obscene gesture at them before pivoting on his heels. When he saw me, he arched a black eyebrow. “Well, well, well another kid in the naughty corner today, huh?”
“Yep.” I turned toward the window, really not in the mood to get to know the guy. The landscape outside was only marginally better than it was in there. It wasn’t even really outside. Just outside of the cell.
A long hallway stretched as far as I could see. It was khaki-colored but clean, with more of the flickering lights and absolutely no personality.
“I’m taking it this is your first time?” Dave asked. A cot squeaked under his mammoth weight as he heaved himself down on it.
“Yep.”
A deep chuckle came from him. It was a surprisingly cheerful sound for a place like this. “You’re really talkative with all those one-word answers, my man. What’s your name?”
“Lincoln.” I rested my head against one of the cool bars, shutting my mouth again.
“I’m Dave,” he offered. “I’m also something of a veteran around here. I know it’s nothing to be proud of, but I’m kinda proud of it.”
“Congratulations,” I muttered.
Clearly, the man didn’t give a fuck about my lack of enthusiasm. “Want to know what I’m in for this time?”
I gritted my teeth, dragging in a deep breath. “Not really.”
“Well, I’ll tell you anyway,” he said. I heard more creaks, and when I opened my eyes to see what had caused them, I saw Dave had spread himself out on the crappy cot like he was lying on a king-sized bed in a luxury hotel.
He seemed to be entirely at peace. His hands were tucked behind his head and his boots were on the floor. He’d crossed his socked feet and was peering at me between eyelashes that were way too long for a man of his size. It was freaky really.
Smirking when he caught my eye, he shook his head without lifting it. “It’s no use trying to ignore me, dude. Trust me. Talking is the only thing that makes time feel like it’s actually passing in this place.”
I sighed but inclined my head. “Yeah, you’re probably right. I don’t even know how many days have
passed since they tossed me in here.”
“Days?” His brows rose. “Why are you still in holding?”
Because they don’t have anything to charge me for. “They haven’t processed me yet.”
A deep frown appeared on his massive forehead. “That’s fucked up, man. So they’re just keeping you in purgatory?”
“Yep. I guess it’s better than the alternative, though.”
Dave shuddered, nodding his agreement. “Sure, but obviously, they’re not just keeping you here until you’ve sobered up or something.”
“True, but this also isn’t a drunk tank.”
He shrugged. “Technically, no, but it’s been used as one on occasion.”
“Really? That hardly seems fair.”
Another chuckle came from him. “Nope, but life isn’t fair. Want to come sit down? Maybe my story will cheer you up. It’s funny as fuck.”
“Sure.” Avoiding him hadn’t worked. Maybe he’d stop running his mouth if I just listened for a minute. “What did you do?”
Unexpected humor lit up his eyes as he lifted his back off the mattress and rolled to his side. “I bet a rookie that he couldn’t outdrink me.”
“He took that bet?” I didn’t know the guy, and I could hold my liquor, but he had a definite size advantage.
Dave grinned, displaying yellowing but perfectly straight teeth. “The idiot did, yes.”
“What was the bet?”
“If he won, I’d do his laundry for a week.” His shoulders shook with silent laughter. “But if I won, he had to hit on a woman of my choosing.”
“Who did you choose?” Despite myself, I found my muscles relaxing for the first time in days. Dave’s I-don’t-give-a-fuck attitude was refreshing after days of solitude and silence.
He smirked at me, his lips trembling as he tried to hold back his laughter. “I chose our lieutenant’s girlfriend, of course. He didn’t know who she was, but he was too arrogant to listen when the others told him to pass on the bet.”
“I’m assuming he found out who she was? Eventually?”
Let Freedom Ring Page 22