by Edwina Fort
When that didn’t work, Rob’s dumb a** started humming some old negro spiritual and rubbing my back. “Let it out…let it out, it’s okay. Saw in a better place now, bro.” Then his dumb a** went back to humming.
What… the… f***?!
I looked up at him to see if he was serious. Would y’all believe that he was? His red hazy eyes had watered up and everything. And that’s when I realized that Rob smokes entirely too much weed. His f***ing brain cells were fried!
I couldn’t take it…I stood to my feet and stormed out of the funeral home. I needed to find her. Dear God, if you help me find her one more time, I promise I’ll never lose her again. And I’ll never underestimate her.
The man with no shoes was right. I am a stiff neck. I had been so vain and stupid…thought I had everything and everybody figured out. How could I be so careless with love?
When I got back to my loft I sat down at my computer and refused to move till I found her. Minutes turned into hours and hours into days.
My mother came back and I vaguely remember talking to her. A fever had come over me and I was determined to find Nak. There was no other option. And because I wasn’t born with the giving up gene, I would keep looking…I will never stop.
I don’t know how many days passed, but outside of showering and my mom forcing me downstairs so that I could eat, I didn’t leave my computer. I’d searched everywhere. I had several private investigators in New York and Brazil watching her father’s family and because there was no known address for the house Nak grew up in, I had them searching the area around the clinic she’d gone to when she was younger.
So far, nothing.
My mom and my brother were worried about me. Even my men tried to lure me out of my den. But I wasn’t trying to hear anything that didn’t have to do with Nak’s whereabouts. Eventually, my punk a** brother brought in the big guns.
“Ay Bo, let’s go, I need to chat with you.”
I exhaled as I continued to stare at my computer screen. In between searching for Nak, I’d been looking into Jo’s case and I think I had it just about figured out.
"Bo, I know you hear me," Hitta said from behind me.
Damn, I was not in the mood to deal with this big mutha f***a. But I could hear in his voice that he wasn’t going to leave till he got what he wanted.
“Not today, Hitta, I’m in the middle of somethi—” The last of my sentence came out a squeak because the big bastard snatched me right up out of my chair.
“Damn mutha f***a! What part of I’m busy didn’t you comprehend?” I growled when he put me back down on my feet. “If you wasn’t so big, I’ll knock yo’ a** out right now!”
He stood grinning at me, not in the least worried about my threat, as his eyes took me in. “You look a mess, Bo. When the last time you been to the barbershop? If that wild a** girl do come back to you, she gon’ take one look and run back out the door.”
I reached up and touched my head and then my beard that had gotten out of hand.
Sh*t! It had been a while…
He jerked his head toward the door. “Come on, man, I got some sh*t to run by you. I need to get a cut too.”
When you Hard Hitta, the barber comes to you. He and I sat in two barber chairs in the basement of the gym, where believe it or not was a small barbershop. He had two barbers come out so that neither of us had to wait.
“You know what you did with ol’ girl? You know how you got her to yo’ crib?”
Because he was my best friend and I spoke Hitta fluently, I knew he was being invasive because of the barbers, so the ol’ girl he was speaking of was Nak. And how I got her to my crib meant me practically kidnapping her.
“Yeah, what about it?”
He exhaled, “I’ve been thinking about doing some sh*t like that with Angel.”
I chuckled, my boy had finally gotten desperate. He and I were two peas of a pod. We both had women throwing themselves at us on a daily basis, and here the two we wanted didn’t want to have anything to do with us.
Suddenly I had renewed energy, I was going to help my boy get his girl because it was time out for these f***ing women trashing our hearts… My man here had been letting the f***ing Tea Maker know how he felt about her, and she was still walking around like his feelings don’t mean sh*t!
“Okay, this is what you have to do… First, you need to study yo’ girl. Find out what she likes, what she don’t like, where she like to go, the kind of sh*t she like to see. Find out what she’s lacking and the stuff she dreams of one day having.”
I sat up in my chair as a second wave of hope entered my body. “Then you need to come up with some bait, some sh*t you know she can’t resist…that’s what you’re going to use to lure her in. Now once she takes the bait, she’s yours.” I held up my finger.
“But you need to make sure you create an environment that’s a hundred times better than her present environment. You need to create a world for her that she will never want to leave.” I didn’t have to go into more detail.
Many people didn’t know it, but Hard Hitta was a very smart man. His speech threw a lot of people off and most folks just assumed he was uneducated because of it. But that was the furthest thing from the truth.
Growing up, he learned with me.
A lot of the sh*t I was into, Saw wanted to have nothing to do with. He’d say something like… “Come on, don’t start this nerd sh*t!”
But Hitta…Hitta was always interested. He would sit and learn with me for hours. Neither of us finished school, but that didn’t stop us. After I finished reading a book, I gave it to Hitta…and vice versa.
However, there was something neither of us knew much about…
Love…
“Whatever you do, man…Learn from my mistake, never take her for granted, because then you may lose her when you've only just found her…"
Hitta reached over and put his hand on my shoulder giving it a reassuring squeeze. “Don’t let it break you, Bo…If you and her meant to be, then y’all will be.”
I turned to look at him…those were the last words Nak had said to me.
As soon as I pulled my truck back up to the house, my mother and Rob came running out the building toward me. I could tell by the look on their faces that I was getting ready to be upset.
“Journey’s been shot!” My mother cried clutching for my t-shirt. "I don't know if she's okay…" By this time she was crying so hard, I could barely understand her.
“Ma, calm down and tell me what happened!”
Damn it! Damn it!
I should have brought her and my niece home weeks ago. I’ve been so damn distracted that although the warnings were clear as day, I'd ignored them because my mind had been on finding Nak.
“I was on the phone with Journey’s driver—”
“Who, Albert?”
She nodded…
Thank God! I’d found out some things about Albert as well. The fact that Jo assigned Journey to him proved his love for her.
Albert is a beast…
“What happened then?”
“I heard gunshots and then I heard Albert telling Journey to hold on and that he was going to get her to the hospital. I could hear Ayana screaming and crying in the background…Oh, God! Romeo!"
“Rob, get Ma in the truck, I’ll be right back!” I was on the phone dialing the mayor as I ran in the house for my computer bag.
We needed to get there quickly and the only way we could avoid the lines at the airport is to use the mayor’s private plane.
Dear God, please let my sister and niece be okay… I knew who was behind this. Them mutha f***as was going to pay for this.
I’d already prepared a little treat for them. I had a feeling they were going to do something to piss me off.
But first I needed to get to the hospital…
Please God, let Journey be okay…
Chapter 16
A Reason, A Season, and A
Day…
There are two kinds of people that come in our lives…They are temporary and permanent. Temporary people come to teach lessons like hurt, pain, selfishness, dishonesty, and disloyalty. Permanent people come to live in our hearts, they are the ones that give us strength, confidence, loyalties. Real love is found here.
The truth is, you need the two of them because one teaches values over the other…
--Unknown
Nakhti
I sat at the bistro across the street from my father’s house that he shared with his wife and three children, eating a grilled chicken salad.
I have two sisters and a brother, whose ages are, 19, 15, and 12.
I bet you guys are wondering why I’m sitting across the street watching the house rather than walking up to the door and ringing the bell right?
Well…The are two reasons.
Before I became a SEAL, I'd come home on a short leave and decided I would push my fear to the side and go and talk to my dad. He and his family were all at my brother's little league game, apparently, my batting average came from dad and ran in the family.
Anyway, I’m standing there in my uniform, praying that once he sees it, he will be so proud that he’ll pull me in and give me a great big hug, telling me it didn’t matter that I wasn’t born a boy. And although my mom drilled that into my head, it wasn’t the real reason he’d left. Then he’ll bring me and introduce me to my little siblings.
I’ve watched them from afar a long time, and I knew all three of them look just like me because we all look like him. So…I squared my shoulders and marched forward.
He looked up from where he had been squatting next to my brother giving him some pointers in his ear to see me walking toward him. There is a big nervous smile on my face, but it slowly disappears when he stands giving me such a hostile look it freezes my blood.
I know he recognizes me instantly because his look says he’s angry that I still exist. He wishes I would just disappear. I’m the mistake he's ran from in hopes of never, ever seeing it again. He's convinced himself that it was a mistake he'd never made… But seeing me reminds him that he had, in fact, made the huge mistake of getting a foreign woman pregnant while on tour, and now his mistake had found him.
And then…
And then…
Wheww!!! Lol!! It’s still a little rough on the second telling, but I want you guys to know, so here goes.
He takes my brother and turns him around so that he can’t see me…and then just walks away, leaving me standing there in my freshly clean and pressed uniform, and he never looks back. Not once…
Anyway, it hurt…but hey, what can you do about it? Ever since then, I came from time to time to watch them from a distance, because I’m pathetic. However, I think I understand why he did it.
For the most part, they look happy. He goes to work, comes home every night, helps the kids with their homework…kisses his little wife on the cheek.
I remind him of the chaos in his life. With me comes too many unanswered questions. To retain the happiness of his house, sacrifices had to be made…And the sacrifice was me.
I’m already damaged…he can save his other children. And we all know the best way to do that is to keep them away from me.
Well…After today he’ll never have to worry because I’ve come to say goodbye, from a distance of course…but still goodbye. This will be my last time spying on my perfect family…made perfect because they don’t know me.
I won’t be coming back to New York, there is nothing that draws me back here. Even my favorite pet store has closed. I wondered if my little buddy Crumble was okay. I'd come back to adopt him because Giant could use a friend and since I was officially retired, I was free to take him home, only to find a for sale sign on the pet shop’s door.
I exhaled…
Life sucks…
The second reason I was sitting here at the bistro across the street from my father’s house instead of someplace closer is because Rome had three private investigators watching the house. One sat four tables to my left, watching a car race on his phone. Every few minutes he’ll look up and glance across the street to see if anything new had happened.
Chuckling, I shook my head.
Men…
“Moving on is hard to do, isn’t it?”
That deep voice came from my right, I turned and gasped when I saw the big man sitting at the table next to mine with a cup of tea in his hand.
That was not what startled me. First of all, I didn’t hear him sit down. A man that big should have made a sound. And second, he looked like a bonified black cowboy. The smell of his leather duster engrained its authenticity.
My gaze traveled down his powerful frame to his feet that were covered in a pair of black cowboy boots, with spurs…
Nossa!
Chills went through my body. It felt like I was sitting next to a ball of powerful energy that was barely being contained by the flesh of the man.
I cleared my throat. “Yeah, it is pretty hard.”
He nodded his head as he lifted his tea to his lips. “A reason, a season, and a day.”
“Excuse me?” I asked, not understanding his meaning.
“There are some people who come into our lives for a reason, there are some who come for a season, and then there are some who come for only a day.” As he spoke, he stared out the window seeming to be lost in his own memories.
I couldn’t help but wonder who it was in his life that had come and gone, and who was still there. It was frightening how close his words hit towards home. I narrowed my eyes as I stared at the fella.
There was something else about this guy… It felt as if I knew him, he felt familiar, like a father, or a grandfather, which was strange because he didn’t look old enough to be my father, or my grandfather. He looked to be my age, maybe slightly older.
“I thought the saying was a season, a reason and a lifetime?” I told him, toying with my fork.
He chuckled… “I assure you that everybody that says hello will eventually say goodbye…We only have a season to get it right. Assuming a lifetime is vanity.”
I nodded, I guess I can see that. He turned and looked at me then and I inhaled sharply. His dark eyes were ancient.
Nossa!
The things he must have seen to make them that way. Suddenly, I knew that it wasn’t a coincidence he was sitting here next to me. This is going to sound strange, but I felt like I wanted to cling to him and never let him go.
He chuckled again looking away from me. “You are stronger than you believe, child.”
“Who are you?”
And why does it feel like my soul is connected to yours?
He shook his head a bit. “I’m nobody…most folks call me The Preacher.”
I frowned. “Are you a preacher?” He didn’t look like no preacher I ever seen.
“Not in the way you’re thinking. I’m a convener in the true sense of the word. What I do is not for show, I don’t have a huge following, and I only make myself known to those who need to hear what I have to say.”
“Why did you make yourself known to me?”
He turned to look at me then with those unsettling eyes. “Really soon you’re going to be forced to stop running. Like the rest of us, you must pick up your stake and carry it.” His gaze went back to my father’s house.
“A reason, a season and a day, child. Some of us weren’t meant to live normal lives. Although we can’t see it…Sometimes the Ancient of Days removes obstacles that if remained, would become stumbling blocks in our path. And unfortunately, we’ve reached a critical hour and there is no longer time for certain… distractions.” As he spoke, my father, looking so very handsome in his suit, came out of his brownstone and walked to his car.
The private investigator that was sitting a few tables away from me got up and hurried out the restaurant to follow him.
"But that's okay because The Great One reward
s his servants significantly. And although it seems as if you’re drowning in your sorrow, this too shall pass. The young prince will find you and for a moment, you and he will have normal. Cherish those days, because they won’t last. Perilous times are coming, and everything we once knew will be destroyed in one hour.”
His gaze came to me one last time… “The moment will come where you will have to choose to take a chance at love again.” He nodded. “Be brave and choose love. You two are destined to inherit the Kingdom together. Enjoy the little time you have left.”
And then he stood and pulled a hundred dollar bill out his pocket… “Lunch is on me.”
He placed the bill on the table and walked out of the bistro without looking back. When he opened the door, the wind blew his coat open slightly, and it was then when I saw the impressive sword there on his hip.
I looked around to see if anybody else had noticed. Nobody had…
Hmmm…
I wasn’t big on the supernatural, not like Rome, who believed with his whole heart and soul. But I’m pretty sure there was more to the Preacher than what he presented.
My gaze went back to my dad’s house. A reason, a season, and a day… The Preacher was right, to assume a lifetime is vanity. I’d assumed Jo would be in my life forever, but that had been vain. After what had gone on with Rome, I didn’t even try to contact him.
As far as he is concerned, I’m dead. This was all his fault. He sent me into a situation that I was doomed to fail. He’d used me to get to Rome, and Rome had used me to get back at Jo. The Preacher said to give love another chance, but I don’t think I will.
If Rome was the prince he spoke about, he was wrong in his thoughts that he will find me. Once I left the United States, nobody will be able to find me.
I stood gathering my things, leaving the hundred-dollar bill on the table. My salad was about ten dollars, and the Preacher’s tea couldn’t have been any more than two.
This blessing I will pay forward…
It was time for me to move on with my life and begin anew…