“Shut up, Ava,” I interrupted her, knowing if I didn’t stop her, she would ramble on for a while. “You don’t need to rant. If you’d be quiet for two seconds, I could explain—”
“You don’t need to explain,” she interrupted right back, making me growl in frustration. “Even if she was lying, I saw what I saw, and even Rabia saw you two, so there really isn’t anything to say.”
“Oh, my God, you’re pissing me off. If you’d stop being so dramatic—”
“I am not being dramatic—”
“And let me talk—”
“I said there’s nothing to talk about.”
“Ava, please.” I moved so close to her, she had to lean back to meet my gaze. “Nothing is going on between me and Sydney.”
“But, I—”
“Don’t interrupt,” I growled. “We dated a few times at the beginning of the year, but I don’t like her that way, so it didn’t go anywhere. If she thinks there is more between us, then it’s on her because I’ve been very clear. What you saw yesterday was me giving someone a ride home because they wouldn’t leave me alone until I said yes. So, if you want to go all psycho-bitch crazy, make sure you get your facts first.” With another pause, I loosed a breath. She had to know what she was to me, what I needed her to be. “There is no other girl, Ava. I have never put this much effort into any girl before.”
“Is that supposed to be a compliment?” she asked in a sarcastic tone, crossing her arms over her chest.
“Jeez, you drive me nuts.” I chuckled. “So… we good?”
She stayed silent for a long minute, but I let her have the silence. There was no reason for her not to believe me, but I was done convincing her. She had to do the rest. On top of everything else, she had to be scared now that our feelings were out there. The emotions rolling through me were terrifying, but I was done being afraid I would make my dad’s mistakes. I wasn’t him—I would never be him.
After the longest pause known to man, she finally said, “Yes,” her shoulders drooping in defeat. “We’re good. And I’m sorry for going all crazy bitch on you, but I don’t even know what to think with you ninety percent of the time.”
“Then don’t try so hard,” I suggested.
Pulling her back in, I brushed a hand over her soft cheek, causing a sigh to escape her—the best sound in the world. I dipped down, devouring her mouth again before she could protest.
She didn’t stop me, at least, not until a throat was cleared behind us. Eyes wide, she shoved away from me and spun around. It was only Mason and Rabia, but blood rushed over her neck, cheeks, and up the tips of her ears. Freaking adorable. Mason had a goofy smile on, wagging his eyebrows, whereas Rabia shifted around, looking anywhere but at us.
“You kept us waiting too long,” Mason told Ava with a smirk, and I chuckled, receiving a glare from Ava. “I guess now we know why.”
“Shut up, Mason,” Rabia scolded, elbowing him.
“So, anyway.” Ava clenched her hands together, giving me a sideways glance.
Her embarrassment at getting caught kissing—a situation I’m sure she had never been in before—made her even more amazing in my eyes. The girls I usually got with couldn’t care less about being seen doing a lot more than kissing in public. It made her special, made me want to do right by her.
“We should get going, seeing as you’re grounded and your mom hates me,” Ava pointed out.
“She doesn’t hate you.” I rolled my eyes. The idea of her leaving right after we defined our relationship—or at least laid the groundwork for it—was intolerable. There had to be a way to keep her there a bit longer. “Besides, I’m only grounded from leaving the house, and she works until eleven. You guys could hang out, and we can order some pizza.”
“Um, no.” She shook her head, starting for the door, but I grabbed her hand, keeping her from going any further. The defeated look she gave me with slumped shoulders told me all I needed to know. “I don’t want her to hate me even more.”
“It’s okay, Ava.” I hauled her toward my room, motioning for Rabia and Mase to follow.
“Yeah, Av, lighten up.” Mason gave her a playful shove.
She was outvoted, but Rabia did give her a look that said she would ditch us if Ava wasn’t comfortable staying. Ava gave her a smile, which had my chest tightening again. She was staying and actually wanted to.
We hung out in my room, crowding onto my futon. Ava got to pick out the movie and food since her day had sucked. I wanted to do everything in my power to make her day end well. She chose the cheesy original Halloween, her favorite, and we ordered Chinese food. When the movie was over, she tried to get Mason and Rabia to leave, but they protested, so they stayed for one more movie, which had them leaving right before eleven.
I didn’t want her to go—I wanted to spend every second I could with her. But she had a curfew, and she was probably planning to run in the morning. Eleven was way past her bedtime. I walked them to the door and pulled her into a tight hug, kissing her forehead, reveling in the sound of her breath catching in her throat. Rabia and Mason went out the door after a quick goodbye, leaving us to have a minute.
“Promise me something,” I whispered, and she met my gaze. “I still want you to go out with Rabia and Mason on Saturday.”
“But you’re grounded. You won’t get to come.” The disappointment in her voice made me smile.
“That’s okay, there’s always next week for me. Just because I can’t go, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t spend some time with your friends.”
She screwed up her face before sighing. “On one condition.”
“Which is?”
“Behave yourself during this week,” she told me, and I barked out a laugh.
“I promise, I’ll be good.” I unwrapped my arms from her and walked her to the door. “I’ll text you right when my mom gives my phone back.”
“Ooookaay,” she drew out the word, making me chuckle.
With a quick kiss on the cheek, I sent her on her way, preparing myself for a very shitty week to come.
Chapter Seventeen
Ava
By the time I got home, it was twenty past eleven, but my parents didn’t fuss about it. My dad seemed to be in a better mood, which meant Mom probably spoke to him about being so hard on me. Once they went up to bed, I snuck into the garage to look at my car. I had avoided the slightest thoughts of it, of what happened, for most of the day, but it was time to face it.
Stepping inside the dark garage, I scrounged for the light, my heart breaking all over again the second my poor car was illuminated. To keep from examining each spray-painted word, I remained on the steps. Tears stung my eyes while I wondered why someone would do such a thing to me, what motive they had to do something so hateful. Sitting on the steps, my arms wrapped around my legs, I rested my chin on my knees, hoping to get the rest of my self-pity out.
The garage door swinging open startled me. Before spinning around to see who was interrupting my pity party, I swiped away the few tears that had escaped. Mia stood in the doorway in her pajama shorts and tank top, watching me.
When I went to jump up, she held a hand out, shaking her head. “Stay put,” she told me when she came to the step I was sitting on, plopping down next to me. I didn’t know what to say to her or if she wanted to talk at all, so I stayed quiet. We sat that way for a few minutes, until she sighed. “I’m really sorry about your car,” she said, giving the car a horrified expression.
“Um, thank you?” was the only thing that came to mind.
“I’m serious, Ava.” She turned her gaze on me, and it was full of such remorse, making it seem as though she felt responsible for it. “You didn’t deserve it. You’re not any of the things they wrote on there.” My mouth hung open for a second while I registered the sincerity in her tone. “I also came out here to thank you for having my back on Saturday. You made sure I didn’t get in trouble—you stuck your neck out for me, and then I was a bitch to you, so I’m sorry about tha
t too.”
Her rare show of maturity took me aback. The moment seemed so fragile, so breakable, I wasn’t sure how to react. “Yeah, you were a bitch,” I confirmed with a nod, making her chuckle. “But being a bitch doesn’t mean your sister shouldn’t have your back. I’ll always have yours, Mia.”
“Thanks, Av.” She leaned over, giving me an awkward side hug. “I hope they find the fucker who did that to your car. I can’t wait to see Daddy make them pay.”
“Yeah, me either,” I agreed, before considering her with a sideways glance. Even with how fragile the conversation appeared, I couldn’t not try to get answers from her. “So… um… Kai, he, um, he said Pierce told him he’s worried about you.” I paused to see if she would stop me or yell at me. Since she did neither, I went on. “But that’s just silly. What would Pierce know that your family doesn’t? Am I right?”
She turned her gaze from me, making my heart pound, my stomach clench. “It’s nothing, Ava. He’s just being overprotective. Just like Kai.” She glanced sideways at me. “I promise, it’s nothing.”
With a nod, I cleared my throat. “But the other night, when you were drunk, you said you did something terrible. You asked for help. Please, Mia, please let me help you with whatever you’re dealing with.”
Her eyes shifted back and forth before her walls slammed in place. “I said it’s nothing. And besides, I was drunk, saying a bunch of nonsense. You don’t need to worry.” She gave my car a weary eye, wrapping her arms around her middle.
“Okay. I believe you,” I conceded. How could I push if she didn’t want to talk? I couldn’t force her to. This was the nicest conversation we’d had in weeks. I would have hated to end it in a screaming match. “Well, thanks for coming out here, for being nice.”
“I was due.” Her sad smile cracked my heart in two.
I stood, offering her a hand. “We should get to bed.”
She nodded, taking my hand. We went back in the house and climbed the stairs together. Anything could have made the moment crumble—the fact I was able to ask her anything without her blowing a gasket was a miracle—so instead of prying any further, like I wanted to, I left it the way it was.
She gave me another quick, uncomfortable hug when we came to her room, before saying goodnight and going in. I stared at her door for a minute, hoping to God she would open up soon, she would confide in me and share her burdens.
One more day of school was skipped. The idea of facing the world again so soon was too daunting. My responsibilities could wait another day, even if my homework pile would be enormous the next day. But I did keep my promise to Cade and picked Mason and Rabia up in my dad’s Jeep at seven the next night. It was Rabia’s idea to go out the night before I returned to everyday life, rather than waiting until Saturday. Apparently, we were sticking to whatever idea she had given Cade, but I had no idea what it was.
When Rabia asked if we could pick up her friend Kenton on the way, I about fell out of my seat. When I raised my eyebrows at her, a rosy hue bloomed on her cheeks. “Who’s Kenton?” I asked.
“He’s in her trig class,” Mason told me from the back seat, wagging his eyebrows when I looked at him in the rearview mirror. A pang of guilt rocked through me for not having known about Kenton already because I hadn’t had a good girl talk with Rabia in ages.
“He’s only a friend,” Rabia told both of us, but her cheeks had turned an even darker shade of red.
“Okay.” I smiled, not wanting to push if she was uncomfortable. Besides, I could always get the details from her when we were alone.
While she told me how to get to his house, she fidgeted in her seat, pulling on her braid the entire time. When we pulled up to the little, gray house, a tall, kind of lanky guy with short, dark-brown hair and fair skin came out. He wore worn jeans and a black, band T-shirt, even though it was drizzling pretty heavily. I recognized him from around campus but had never spoken to him. He wore a nervous smile when he got in the back seat with Mason.
“Hey, Kenton,” Rabia greeted him first, and he gave her a not-so-shy smile. “You’ve already met Mason.” She pointed to Mase, and they shook hands and did the “hey, man” thing. Then she looked at me with nervous eyes. “And this is Ava. Ava, Kenton.”
“Nice to meet you, Kenton.” I twisted in my seat and held out a hand to shake his as well.
“Yeah, you too.” He smiled, taking my hand eagerly. Then his features hardened. He gripped my hand tighter, and his smile vanished. “I wanted to tell you how sorry I am about what happened to your car.”
My heart fell into my stomach and my smile dissipated for a second before I could recover. Plastering on a tentative smile was useless as his face had already turned beet red, his eyes widening in horror. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have brought it up,” he stammered, giving Rabia an embarrassed look, making my smile come back for real.
“It’s okay,” I told him. “It happened and it’s shitty, but it’s getting fixed, and that’s about all to be done. But I really appreciate your concern.”
He nodded stiffly then sat back in his seat, still looking horrified. Embarrassing him was the last thing I wanted to do, especially in front of Rabia who was watching me with worried eyes, as if I was a bomb about to go off. “So, where to next?” I asked with the most enthusiasm I could summon. I glanced back at Mason. “Are we getting Rachel too?” I wagged my eyebrows, making him and Rabia choke with laughter.
“Nope, this is it.” Mase shook his head, stretching his legs out.
“Where to, Rabia?” I asked while she continued chuckling.
“We’re going bowling!" she announced with a smile.
“Yay!” I exclaimed and got us back on the road. Bowling was not my strong suit, but it was one of my favorite activities. I gave her a sideways glance. “Thanks, bestie.”
“I knew you hadn’t been in forever.” She shrugged. “I thought it was about time we went and made a ruckus at the alley.”
We did exactly that. We ordered way too many snacks and drinks for our table and began to play. I was still terrible, or maybe even worse, but I had a blast bowling granny style. We didn’t get a lane with bumpers, so I didn’t get very many points, but that wasn’t the reason we were there. Rabia was pretty good, and Mason mostly messed around the whole time, talking with people at other lanes, but Kenton surprised us by being totally awesome. He got a strike on almost every one of his turns.
Watching Rabia and Kenton flirt the entire night was even more fun than bowling. Seeing my friend with someone who liked her the same amount she liked them, if not more, made my heart lighter than it had been all week.
When cosmic bowling started, I took a break and sat at our table to munch on some nachos. The fat girl inside me did cartwheels. I promised myself I would run an extra mile the next morning to work it off. Besides, a longer run was a sure way to prepare for what was bound to be a shitty day.
Mason came to sit by me and started working on a pile of cheese fries while we watched Rabia and Kenton play. “They’re disgustingly cute,” Mase commented with a mouthful of fries, then washed it down with some Coke. I could barely hear him over the loud music, but I nodded with a smile.
“I love it.” I shoved his shoulder then ate another nacho. “I’m happy for her. She’s usually so shy, but she seems to be able to be herself in front of him.”
“Yeah, yeah.” He rolled his eyes, and I gave him a questioning look. “The mushy stuff is annoying.” He shrugged.
“Well, most girls love the mushy stuff, so if you want to land a girl like Rachel, you better buck up and embrace the mush.”
With a devilish smile, he said, “Nah, I’m working my magic.”
This had me shaking my head. “I’m serious, Mase. You buy that girl some flowers and ask her to prom in a super cheesy way, she’ll say yes in a second.”
“I’ll think about it.” He shrugged and ate some more fries. “So, what about you and Cade? I thought you two had given up the dating thing like two ye
ars ago?”
Blood rushed to my face. Thankfully, the black lights were on my side. “Umm, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I looked away, crossing my arms over my chest.
“Ha, so that kiss last night was, what, a friendly peck?”
With a loud groan, I rubbed my hands over my face. “I forgot you saw that.” I laughed. “I don’t know what’s going on. He keeps taking me off guard and doing things that make me think he might want to date again, but nothing is different. I’m still always busy, even more now than I was before, and it drove him nuts the last time we tried.”
“Hmm, maybe he got over it and realized how awesome you are,” he said in a serious tone. “Seriously, Ava, the guy was an idiot to give you up the first time. If he has any brains, he won’t let you go this time.”
“Wow, I don’t think I have ever heard you say something serious before.” I chuckled, giving him another playful shove.
After that we got a lot less serious, joking around with each other before going back to play some more with Rabia and Kenton. They continued being flipping cute, and I decided I really wanted the dish on how their little fling had come about. When I asked Rabia if she wanted to spend the night and just ride to school with me in the morning, she seemed pretty ecstatic. The next day was bound to be horrible, so I figured I may as well be too exhausted to care about it.
We took the guys home around eleven and got right to talking. When we got to the house, it was almost midnight and the house was quiet. We went straight up to my room and I lent her some pajamas. Even though I was exhausted, we talked into the night.
She told me about Kenton, who she had apparently had a thing for since the beginning of the semester. They sat by each other in their trig class. It had started with him telling her he liked her hair. It turned into them working on their assignments together and calling each other after school. The excitement that overtook her when she talked about him made me so happy. I told her as much.
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