Braden looked less than happy about the sexual conversation concerning his mate. “What’s the problem with Kam doing this?”
“He’s part of the Marid mission. We’ll all be working closely together. I think it’s best that—”
“Bullshit. Erik is jealous,” Torque interjected with a laugh. “The thought of another cock challenging his doesn’t sit well, so he wants you in there instead, Braden.”
Braden looked at Torque as if he’d lost his mind. “What do you think I have between my legs?”
“You’re mated. It’s not the same. This argument is ludicrous. I’ll do Leila, and with great pleasure. I have more experience than any of you with Initiations. Let’s just get on with it. We have a mission pending. And I’m horny as hell.”
“Back off, Torque. This doesn’t concern you.” Erik feared Torque’s sexual tastes were too close to what Leila really needed deep down. The competition made him uncomfortable, because Torque wouldn’t hesitate to take advantage of her need, if he discovered the truth. He wasn’t the type of man to do what was right, over what served him best. And Leila would be the one who ended up hurt in the long run. He couldn’t allow that to happen.
He pulled Braden aside. When he spoke, he lowered his voice. “You know that Kam is unstable. With Laszlo disappearing, and the two of them working so closely together, I’m not as comfortable with him as I used to be. And Torque, well, there’s no way. He’s huge. Leila is too delicate. He’d rip her in two.”
“Kam is fine, for now. Leila confirmed that in her reports to me. Kam would never hurt her. You know that. I understand about Torque, even if the ‘delicate’ and ‘ripping her in two’ parts are a bit overblown.
His size does intimidate most women. But Kam shouldn’t be a problem. I think you’re simply less threatened by me because I’m mated, like Torque said.”
“I’m not threatened by Kam. Leila will belong to me, officially, as soon as I arrange a Branding Ceremony.” Their joining would be permanent and for life. She’d bear his mark and everyone would know she belonged to him.
“Branding? You haven’t even fucked her yet, Erik. Have you? She’ll never agree to Branding. Besides, you need Council approval to bind her.”
“I’ve had the visions, Braden.” He hadn’t told anyone else. But he knew Braden would understand.
He’d experienced visions of Alexa before they joined.
Braden’s eyes narrowed. “Predestined visions? Are you sure? Has she experienced the same?”
“I don’t know. But they’re real breeder visions, not fantasies. I know it.”
With an impatient look, Braden ran a hand down his face. “You’re aware, as well as I, that those visions most likely aren’t genuine at all, but implants by Laszlo. A manipulation of our minds.”
“Laszlo’s not around. He might even be dead, for all we know. And even if he’s still alive, how could he project such images in his supposedly weakened state? If Kam told us the truth about Laszlo’s powers waning. I’m still not so sure about that, or about either of their loyalties. But the visions have to be real.
We found other cases in the records and Xylon legends. And we’ve all heard the stories. You and Alexa experienced the visions, too.”
“Visions, yes. Whether real or—”
“Another case of Laszlo using whatever he deemed necessary to get us to do his bidding.” When Braden nodded, he acquiesced partially. “All right. Maybe some of these visions truly are fantasies, and some might be created by Laszlo, but others could very well be real. No one actually knows for certain.
Regardless, I’d bind Leila tonight, if she’d allow it. I feel that strongly about her.”
“You love her.”
He shifted uncomfortably. His feelings weren’t open for discussion. Not even with Braden. “I owe her.”
And that’s all he intended to admit. He’d already said too much to Kam, and he now regretted voicing his feelings aloud. It put him in a vulnerable position that made him uneasy.
Braden frowned. “Erik, if your actions in regard to Leila come from some false sense of responsibility—”
“I am responsible. Now let’s leave it at that. If Alexa agrees, will you help initiate? It’ll be easier for everyone, all the way around.”
Braden shook his head. “You’re overreacting. Kam is chosen. Leila trusts him. This joining with the three of you will bring all of you closer and help make the upcoming mission a success. It’s our way. It’s best. You two work it out.”
Erik growled deep in his throat and slammed his fist into his palm. So much for his best friend. He didn’t understand why Braden remained so hardheaded about participating. Must be his love for Alexa. That he understood, he supposed, though he didn’t like the position it put him in. “Fine. But Kam’s not touching her unless there’s a real need, and I approve it.”
“Understood.”
* * * * *
The water streamed over Leila’s naked body. She sighed. The warmth relaxed her muscles and soothed her emotions. Long ago, she had turned the open shower into her special retreat. Filled with greenery and stone on the floor and walls, the area felt like a private grotto, complete with waterfall. The bath reminded her of Xylon’s deepest, secluded forests in all their peace and beauty. When off balance, she oftentimes spent hours here regenerating her mind and soul.
Her hands glided over her body, washing the vanilla-scented cleanser from her skin. She imagined several men’s hands doing the same, and her entire body became sensitized. She’d decided to face her re-initiation with a braver attitude. She’d hidden too long from a problem she held no responsibility in, and allowed it to take over her life.
Not that she expected her entire mentality to change like a snap of a switch, but getting through this ceremony would be a first step. A major step. She trusted Braden to make the best choice for her in the Alliance. Maybe she’d even ask if he would attend. His presence, whether participating or not, would ensure her safety. Then she could allow whatever to happen, without anxiety. She’d vid-cell him later and see about arranging it.
A noise drew her attention.
She shut off the water and glanced toward the bath’s entry. Her gaze followed the stone pathway, leading out to her bedchamber.
A shadow appeared at the corner.
Her heart skipped a beat. Before she could move, a man stepped into partial view. A very naked man.
She hadn’t expected anyone so soon! Certainly, she’d receive advance notification before the ceremony began.
The man’s face, and one shoulder, remained covered by shadows, so she couldn’t identify him. He didn’t speak. He just stood in the entry, tall and muscular.
Maybe he wasn’t here for the Initiation. Maybe he’d illegally materialized into her quarters. Momentary panic hit. Her disruptor, a banned weapon for a Class 3 to carry, but she owned one anyway, was hidden in the other room.
Her eyes zeroed in on the man’s cock, which grew hard and impressive under her scrutiny. He stepped further into the light, and her gaze snapped up to his face. “Kam.” She relaxed, but only slightly.
She crossed her arms over her breasts as he approached. His gaze slid down her body, stopping briefly at her pussy, which she attempted to hide by turning to the side. She wasn’t ready yet. She hadn’t concealed her scars. And she needed to contact Braden.
She’d thought he might send… She shook her head. No. It did no good to think about him . Kam would be gentle. That’s what she needed now, not what she secretly craved in the safety of her fantasies, but what she could handle in reality.
Warily, she scrutinized the foreign look on his face. Gone was his half-grin and easygoing stride. Right now, he looked completely serious, and headed toward her with a definite, sexual purpose.
Her gaze lowered to one of his hands. He carried a dildo with him. An Initiation Dildo. It contained the chemicals needed to prepare her internally.
Kam stopped in front of her. “You’re beautifu
l, Leila,” he whispered. He touched her cheek. “I need to fuck you.”
She felt a blush creep up her neck, and wondered if his need was personal or bound by duty.
After a moment, his signature half-grin appeared. “Disappointed?”
The safest answer was another question. “Did you request this assignment?”
He didn’t respond immediately. Instead, his thumb grazed her bottom lip. “What answer would make you feel more at ease?” he finally asked her.
“I don’t know.” And that was the truth. Her feelings were one big jumble right now.
“You smell good.” He brushed her cheek with his. Looking down, with a slight smile on his face, he tugged her arms away from her breasts. “Let me see these beauties. I’ve indulged in many a fantasy about them.”
“About my breasts?” His confession surprised her, and her pussy contracted. She gradually lowered her arms.
He visibly gulped, and his free hand rose to cup one mound. “Oh, yes. So soft. So absolutely perfect.
Just like I imagined.”
Leila chewed at her bottom lip. His hand felt warm and exciting against her skin. How long had he sexually fantasized about her? she wondered.
His thumb grazed her nipple, which had already hardened. At her sharp intake of air, he smiled. “You like that.”
She didn’t respond, nor meet his gaze. She did enjoy the touch very much, but feared admitting it aloud.
She rarely admitted her pleasures aloud.
Peeking up at him from behind lowered lashes, she saw Kam’s eyes glow with desire. She’d always believed him to be a gentle lover, but now their previous conversation came back to haunt her. Don’t for a moment underestimate what I might demand from a woman .
He rubbed the dildo along the front of her thigh. “Spread your legs for me, Leila. Let me ease inside you.”
She wasn’t sure if he was speaking about the dildo or his own hard cock. Kam was one of the sexiest men she knew—a combination of heart, mind, and body that made most women melt. His cock looked so long, smooth, and almost elegant that she had a difficult time not reaching out to touch it. Still, she’d hoped Erik would be the one…
“Um, can you wait in the other room for me? I’ll be out in a minute, then we can continue.” She needed to cover her scars first. She hoped changing their relationship to a physical one wouldn’t ruin their friendship. They’d been close for a long time now, and she enjoyed their camaraderie.
“I like it in here. The shower adds to the erotic mix. You’ve turned your bathing room into a paradise.
Let’s lick every wet drop from each other’s bodies.”
Her stomach fluttered. “You’re not wet,” she whispered.
“A part of me is.” He released her breast and tangled his hand in her hair, directing her head south.
“Look.”
She glanced down and saw beads of moisture on the tip of his cock. “Oh.”
“Go down on your knees and lick the head, Leila. I want to watch you taste my cum. I want to see just how much you love the taste of cock.” He lowered his voice to a deep, sexy timbre. “Suck my dick all the way down your luscious throat. I’ll fill your mouth with the best cum you’ve ever had.”
Her eyes met his. “Not too modest, are you?”
He smiled and leaned forward, whispering against her lips. “Find out for yourself whether it’s true.”
Her heart pounded in her chest. Should she? Before doing anything, she glanced around him. Certainly he wasn’t the only one who would come tonight. Maybe—
“Relax.” His hand eased under her wet hair and down her back. “We’ll go slowly.” When his fingers contacted rough skin, she jumped away as if his touch had burned her. He frowned. “What the hell?”
“Sorry. You took me by surprise. I guess I’m a little more nervous than I expected. Even with you, a friend. Go ahead and wait for me in the bedchamber. I’ll be out in a bit.”
“I felt something. Turn around,” he ordered in a stern voice that she rarely heard from him.
“I’ll join you when I’m ready.”
He grabbed her arm and forced her around.
“Stop it!” Leila protested. Her hands caught against the stone wall to keep herself from stumbling face-first into the rock.
With the dildo still in hand, he swept aside her long curtain of hair. “Damn it. I didn’t know about this.”
Leila jerked free and spun around. “It’s nothing!”
“Nothing?” Kam’s voice rose. “Someone whipped the skin right off you!” His eyes revealed his sudden realization. “The ones who initiated you did this. They left the scars.” He spoke the words in the form of a statement, not a question.
He knew. He lowered his voice, and compassion shone in his eyes again, like the Kam she knew and loved as her friend.
“Our healing cream won’t remove the marks?”
“No,” she answered, trying not to sound defeated. “They run too deep. It helped, but only to a degree since…”
“Since you couldn’t self-heal.” Kam turned and left the bath.
Leila’s anger, frustration, and overwhelming sadness broke free. She kicked over a pot with a Purple Starleaf in it. Ironic, considering Starleaf plants gave off a calming agent.
A tear slid down her cheek, and she swiped it away. “I can’t blame him for leaving. I’m hideous. I’m—”
No! She raised her chin, not about to put herself through more emotional turmoil. This is not my fault!
“I look the way I look, Kam. Get over it,” she said to no one in particular. She grabbed a drying cloth and dried her body, and as much of her hair as she could, then she donned her favorite white, fuzzy cover-up.
She entered the bedchamber and stopped short. Erik materialized beside Kam, fully clothed, which looked odd since Kam still stood naked. They spoke a moment, then quietly argued about something, most likely her condition. She couldn’t make out most of their words.
So, Erik actually was part of the Alliance, too. She felt disappointed that he hadn’t entered the shower instead of Kam. Maybe he thought Kam a calming presence given her wariness and allowed him to approach her first. Well, neither of them would want her now. And that was fine. She didn’t care.
Liar.
She swiped away another tear, before anyone noticed.
Erik pushed Kam.
“Hey!” She rushed forward. “What’s going on?”
Neither man said anything. They just stared at each other with fire in their eyes.
Without warning, Erik turned and dragged her into his arms. He kissed her soundly, for just a moment, then released her. When she teetered backward, and her hands sought purchase, both men reached out to steady her.
“Point made, Erik,” Kam said. “Even if done a bit barbarically.”
“Next time, I’ll rip off your head. And I’m not necessarily speaking about the one on top of your shoulders.”
Confusion filled her. They stared at each other like mortal enemies. Whatever was going on had to be a male thing. She touched her mouth, still tingling from Erik’s kiss. His spicy taste lingered. She drew her tongue along her lips, trying to capture the unique flavor.
Erik’s head turned, and his eyes met hers. She quickly slid her tongue back into her mouth. A look she couldn’t discern, almost like possession, crossed his face. No man had ever looked at her like she belonged to him. Her independent nature bristled at the thought, but deep down something about the idea warmed her and made her feel complete.
Kam had certainly told him of her damaged back, given the intensity of their conversation. She wondered about his thoughts. She normally applied skin patches to the scars, which made them virtually undetectable, even on naked flesh. But she hadn’t had time, not expecting the re-initiation to take place without notice.
The air by the door shimmered. Braden materialized in. A moment later, Torque followed. Kam must have called them. Shit.
“What’s the problem?” Braden a
sked.
“Limp already, boys? You had to call for backup a little soon, didn’t you? Can’t get ‘em up?” Torque laughed.
“Shut up, Torque,” Kam ground out.
Erik stood uncharacteristically quiet. His eyes held a hard look. This could not be good.
Kam turned toward her. “Drop your cover-up for them, Leila.”
She glanced around the room at the four men staring at her. She didn’t want to be gawked at. They couldn’t change her appearance anyway. So, what did it matter? “No. I want a few minutes of privacy.”
Even though Kam would certainly tell Braden and Torque what had happened, she still wanted to cover the scars, so they wouldn’t look at her with pity, if they did continue with the re-initiation.
“Drop the cover,” Kam repeated. “Or I’ll rip it from you myself.”
Her eyes widened in shock. His voice had come out deceptively calm. But she saw the seriousness in his eyes and suspected the medicine contributed to his harsh words and maybe his actions too, which might have caused the problem with Erik.
“Back off, Kam,” Erik warned.
She retreated a step. If he dared touch her in anger, she’d never give him another shot. That formula adversely affected his personality, too adversely. He could end up hurting someone, and she didn’t want that someone to be her . Even as she thought the condemning words, she knew they weren’t true. She’d never let him suffer, no matter what.
“She has the right to choose what to do.” Erik pushed Kam aside and wrapped his fingers around her arm. “Come over here with me.” He pulled her toward the far side of the room.
Kam hesitated a moment, looking at Erik like he wanted to punch him out. As she and Erik passed, Kam went to speak with Braden and Torque.
“Someone want to tell me what’s going on?”
With her back turned, she heard Braden ask Kam the question. After that, all she heard were whispers.
She was surprised that Kam had let Erik shove him twice, with virtually no response. True, Erik outranked him, stood taller and more muscular, but Kam wasn’t a pushover. “You shouldn’t treat him like that.”
“Kam needs to learn his place.” Erik stared into her eyes. “Did he hurt you in the shower?”
His Carnal Need (Xylon Warriors 2) Page 5