by Amy Sumida
“I don’t know yet. And I won’t know until we find our Ignis.” He ran a loving hand over the piece. Part of me wanted to be the sculpture right then. I told that part to shut the hell up. “It’s a representation of our Genus. What it becomes depends on what we become.”
His hand ran over the unfinished flame side, the stone beneath moving as he lost himself in the moment. A section that remained untouched began to take on the general outline of flames.
I stood there, completely unworthy of witnessing this moment in time and feeling like a total ass for my earlier comment. My fingers reached out to brush against the smooth, cool stone, but I yanked them back at the last minute and wrapped my good arm around my middle while the pain in my injured wrist reduced to a dull ache. JJ startled at my abrupt motion and tossed the sheet back over it, turning to me with a rueful smile.
“Sorry, I tend to get lost in my art.” Splotches of red spread over his cheeks as he took hold of my good hand, tugging me out of the studio and toward the house. “Lets go find out what Souta and Brooks are up to.”
We found them in the house. Brooks managed to curl his long, lean frame into a plush armchair and seemed absorbed in a book whose title hid from me. Souta lay stretched out on a matching plush couch watching one of those celebrity gossip shows.
His eyes lit up, and he bounced off the couch, flinging an arm around both me and JJ. “Come on. My favorite show is on.”
I stumbled over my feet as Souta led us to the couch. Brooks glanced up from his book and gave a fond little grin at the oddball picture we made, like a demented version of a three-legged race I imagine.
“Um. I don’t really like gossip,” I confessed. The horrified expression falling across Souta’s face cracked me up and I couldn’t contain the howl of laughter. “Sorry,” I gasped out. “I don’t like fiction, either.” Now Brooks’ expression matched his boyfriend’s, and it took everything in me not to fall to the floor and roll around like a loon. “I just...prefer...dealing in...” I fought out the words between trying to gulp down giggles. “Facts.” I managed to regain control of myself and wiped a tear from my eye. “Too many half-truths and outright lies and broken promises in my early years.”
Sadness and pity filled their eyes, but I smiled and shrugged it away, then distracted them by making ridiculous comments on the show playing on the TV.
We hung out and enjoyed the afternoon, and I found myself becoming more relaxed in their presence. The three of them together seemed to almost balance out. Brooks’ quiet strength, Souta’s easy affection, and JJ’s pure confidence mixed together perfectly. Still, I noticed they seemed the tiniest bit off. Or I thought they seemed off because I knew they lacked an Ignis. I wanted them to find their fire, to find the one person who would ignite the passions in them, both separately and as a Genus. They deserved it.
Evening fell faster than I liked, and the boys prepared to get me back to the dorms. As we walked out, a car pulled up and out stepped an older, debonair version of JJ. The guy smiled as his eyes found us. His confident stride brought him to us quickly.
“Hey Junior. Who’s this?” he asked, ruffling JJ’s hair in the process.
JJ grunted, smiled and straightened his hair. “Dad, meet Sera. Sera, my dad, Jared Harris Senior.” JJ made the introductions before turning back to his dad. “She’s new in town and school. Be nice.”
A light went off over my head as I registered the introduction. I wondered what JJ stood for and now I knew. JJ and his dad talked for another minute before he excused us to get me back.
The return journey flew by, and I became reluctant to leave them. I didn’t know what waited for me, but Aguirre had all day to plan her revenge.
I plodded into the dorm after dragging out the goodbyes as long as I could. Cold ran up my arm as I pushed through the entry only to be greeted by silence. Well, the TV blared but everyone in the common area sat enraptured. A tiny woman barreled into the room and grasped my hands. I managed to bit back the cry but I couldn’t contain the wince. Careful of my now aching wrist, I pulled my hands from hers.
“Hello! You must be Seraphina! I’m glad to finally meet you!” My eyes went wide at the hyperactive bunny act she seemed to put on. It couldn’t be real. I hoped she ate a bunch of sugar right before I got back. I preferred it to Aguirre but it would get old fast. “I’m Kira, the other house monitor! Aguirre is off on weekends but she’ll be back Monday!”
I breathed a sigh of relief at the unexpected reprieve and dragged myself off to my room, Kira chattering excitedly behind me.
Chapter Six
By the time Monday rolled around, I discovered the hyperactive bunny act of Kira’s wasn’t as awful as I imagined it would be. Over the weekend I managed to get all caught up on class work and even went out Sunday to gather a few supplies to get me through a week with the warden. Slipping out first thing in the morning, without running into her seemed momentous. I wondered if she was even back yet or if she returned later in the day, either way I appreciated escaping without a confrontation on a weekday. I walked out into the courtyard, dim, gray clouds hung heavy in the sky and promised rain in the near future.
“Hey beautiful!” A familiar, enthusiastic voice greeted, and my head whipped up to find the guys waiting for me near the door to the dorm.
Souta’s graceful stride brought him to me before I could react, and he enveloped me in a full body hug. He pressed us together tightly, making me a tad uncomfortable, but I didn’t stiffen automatically. I called it progress. He pulled back enough to run his gaze over me, and I blushed under his perusal. It seemed I did a lot of blushing lately. Never one to blush before, something about the way the guys’ aimed looks at me made me heat up inside, in a good way.
“Elements, look at you. You are delicious. I could eat you up.” A low growl inserted itself into his voice, sending pools of warmth southwards.
A chuckle behind him made me glance over his shoulder. My gaze found JJ and Brooks. Guilt washed away the warm, fluttery feelings Souta inspired. Souta already had a significant other, and I wouldn’t mess his relationship up. Besides, I didn’t want to date anyone, the guys included. Sure, my inner bitch sneered, if you keep telling yourself it you might actually believe it.
I lost myself in my head again, and the rest of the world faded away. When a pair of lips pressed light and quick against mine I jerked back in surprise. Little more than the barest brush, a breath of a kiss. It sent sparks shooting along my nerves as I swallowed down a nasty, defensive remark.
More chuckling, then someone pulled Souta away. JJ took up residence in the spot vacated by Souta and ran a finger down my arm. It didn’t help the shooting sparks at all. His eyes caught mine, though I tried to avoid them, and his smile made statements I didn’t want to interpret.
“He’s right.” JJ leaned down and whispered in my ear, “This little goth outfit you have going is hot as fuck.”
Teeth grazed my earlobe, tugging at the earrings enough to smart. My breath caught, and the sparks shot down my spine in an array worthy of any Fourth of July show. My head spun, and my normal defenses seemed to be annihilated under this new assault. I needed to put some distance between us and wondered if I should have stayed here Saturday.
Hesitantly, I stepped backward.
“I’m an Ignis,” I shot out with a saucy grin at JJ. “I’m always hot.”
I skirted around him, easily evading his attempt to grab hold of my hand and winked at Souta and Brooks as I sauntered by. I liked them and didn’t want to hurt them with my need to put some distance between us. Strangely, I wanted to keep them as friends.
Even though we all had first period together, I hurried into the school. I needed space and time. I needed air. I needed...fuck...were walls too much to ask? Only a week since we met, and everything seemed to be going sideways. No matter how hard I tried, keeping my distance seemed impossible. JJ’s blatant attraction made me want to run, but Souta confused the hell out me. Souta was dating Brooks, so what
in the name of the elements happened a few moments ago, and why? Brooks, well he seemed to be the only one not throwing me for a loop, but every now and again, I caught a gleam in his eye and a secret in his smile.
I knew the problem. Fear. Fear they would turn out like all the others in the end. Not strong enough to handle people leaving all the time, I closed myself off long ago. Better to yank the chain on this blooming friendship now.
Sinking down into my seat in history, I reached into my bag for my notebook and a pencil. Unfortunately, I reached with my injured wrist. Pain darted up my arm, and I bit back a cry. The day before I bought a proper wrap in town and bound it, hiding it under the cuff of the long sleeved, tight, black lace up shirt I wore under my leather jacket. Since I could move it, I didn’t believe I broke my wrist, but a slight swelling and intense pain remained, even with it tightly wrapped.
I pulled my arm back into my lap without getting out the notebook or pencil. Writing wouldn’t happen today. Hopefully, one of the boys would take decent notes, and I could get a copy. As if my thoughts of them drew them to me, they entered the room and grinned before taking their seats.
JJ leaned over and dropped a kiss next to my ear and whispered, “No running, firefly. We like a chase.”
Those damn sparks shot down my spine again as he sat next to me.
A rap from the front of the room drew my gaze away from JJ. Mrs. Kalan took in the assembled throng of teenagers and sighed before launching into a droning, mind numbing lecture. I detested this class mostly because of Mrs. Kalan’s teaching style. A few of my past teachers proved history could be fun and interesting. When I was forced to sit and listen to someone’s monotonous drone, like they were bored to tears, it killed the joy.
When I failed to take notes like usual, I noticed a couple questioning glances sent my way from the guys. Then, about halfway through class, as I sat picking at fuzz on one of the many rips lining my tight black jeans, I caught on to the sudden and abrupt silence. I jerked my head up to meet a pair of angry eyes hidden behind ass ugly glasses.
“Am I boring you, Miss Embers?” Mrs. Kalan asked sternly.
Aw, fuck. I tried to put an apologetic expression on my face. “No ma’am.”
“Perhaps you consider my history a waste of time, then?” Her voice hardened further, and she stepped closer, looming over me. Anger bloomed at her attempt at intimidation, and I tried hard to keep it from leaking out.
“No, ma’am.” I bit out the words. “I love history.”
“Then, you’ve already read ahead and know everything there is to know about the Elementum during the Salem Witch Trials?” No one in the class could mistake her ire as she slapped her hand down on my desk hard.
“No, ma’am.” I spat out the clipped words, knowing I would blow if she pushed anymore.
Of course, she pushed. “Then you apparently don’t give a damn about school. Well, I won’t have it in my class, missy. You’ll take notes like everyone else, or I’ll fail you regardless of your grades.”
That did it. I worked hard to maintain my grades, and I refused to let one bitch teacher drag me down for something I couldn’t help. I stood up fast, my chair clattering to the floor.
Getting right into the bitch’s face, I slammed my hands down on my desk, ignoring the sharp jolt of pain shooting up my arm. “Listen you fucking bitch. You and half the other staff members here won’t give me half a chance based strictly on what that loser who ran the last school said about me. I’m fucking tired of being treated like a juvenile delinquent for wanting to have a little fun. For element’s sake, I’m an orphan and the only ward of the Concilium Maximus! Do you know what it’s like not having a normal childhood? To be shuttled around from school to school, state to state? To be forced to leave behind every friend you make and die a little more inside as one by one they turn away from you because they can’t handle the fucking distance? To want to be part of something more so goddamned badly you’d do anything to feel like you belonged?”
Tears poured down my cheeks in rivers, and embarrassment ran through me as the tirade of deep-seated feelings I held inside for a long time let loose. In horror, I glanced around the room to find the open-mouthed stares of every person trained on me. Elements, what the fuck had I done? Pity swelled in a few gazes, and I couldn’t take it. I didn’t even try to glance at the guys. It would break me if I found pity it in their eyes. Instead I plastered a sneer on my face.
“Fuck all of you for being so judgmental!” The snarl broke from my throat as I shoved past desks and kicked bags out of my way running from the room.
Chapter Seven
The blessedly empty courtyard greeted me as I slammed through the doors, headless of the pain in my wrist. Over the weekend, I found a bench tucked away in a corner behind a fountain. Little more than a couple feet of concrete, the lush foliage helped hide it from view, making it a perfect spot for someone in need of solitude. I sank down on the bench and pulled my feet up. Tucking my injured wrist into my stomach, I wrapped my good arm around me knees and rested my head on the soft fabric of my frayed jeans.
I shook with combined rage and embarrassment. After only a week here, my emotions seemed to be a damn mess. This incident drove home the fact I needed to reinforce my walls. I allowed myself to become too vulnerable. There was no way I could continue hanging out with the boys.
Shuffling footsteps made me jerk my head up. They couldn’t find me here, could they? I shook harder and choked down the sobs trying to escape. The steps closed in and rounded the fountain. I nearly bolted, until the sun glinted off blond curls tipped in deep blue. Brooks.
Without a word, he sat down next to me on the bench. I stared in wide-eyed shock. Of the three guys, Brooks I knew the least. His quiet, stay-in-the-background personality meant he tended to keep to himself, which I figured out early on. He reached over, his large, warm hand encompassing mine and drawing it to his lips. He kissed the back of it, holding my still shocked gaze with his own pale blue eyes then rested our joined hands in his lap.
“You don’t need to talk.” His deep, low rumble washed over me. “But I make a good listener.”
Part of me wanted to take him at his word and not say a thing. Somehow the other part of me drowned it out, screaming at me to talk to him, to trust him, to put myself out there and be part of something for once. The feeling of rightness, more than anything else, loosened my lips.
“I don’t want to be some sad sob story,” I sighed. His eyes boring into mine became too intimate, and I let my gaze wander, taking in the bright reds, blues, and greens of the foliage around us. “That’s not...not who I am.” I stumbled over the words. “Not who I... want to be.”
“You're not a sob story, but you obviously experience strong feelings concerning some things about your past, your situation.” The soft, quiet rumble of his voice enhanced the sense of intimacy. His thumb stroked across my palm, sending those damn sparks down my spine again. “Have you ever talked to anyone about any of this?” I shook my head. “I didn’t think so. Talk to me, then. Maybe it will help.”
At the nervous glance I sent in the direction of the school, Brooks’ other arm came up and gripped my chin, forcing me to meet his eyes once more. “Hey, this is a judgment free bench and a zone of silence. Nothing you say will be judged. Nothing you say will leave this bench unless you choose to reveal it, okay?”
I nodded and tried to pull out of his grip, but he smiled softly and shook his head.
“You caught some of it when I went on my little tirade.” A wry grin spread across my face. “I’m an orphan, a ward of the Concilium Maximus.”
“Can’t remember ever hearing of anyone being ward of the Concilium before.”
I shook my head. “According to our known history, I’m the first. My mother died in the hospital, an only child whose parents died long before I came along. It’s all I know about my family. The Concilium took custody of me straight from the hospital.”
“What about your father?”
Ah, the question I dreaded. “I don’t know. She never revealed who my father was to anyone. I don’t even know if he’s alive or dead, single or married or anything.” The void in my life where a father should fit hurt more than anything else.
Strong arms suddenly wrapped around me. He gathered me up onto his lap and tucked me into his chest. I stiffened, then gave in to the comfort he offered and buried my face in his shoulder. He smelled fresh, like the air after rain.
“You have a foster family?” he asked. A reasonable assumption, but I shook my head.
“Not for a long time.” His shoulder muffled my words. I turned my face to the side and repeated myself. My breath washed over his neck, and I swore he shivered. “I vaguely remember a family, but not since I started school. Once I became old enough to attend Illustratio, I lived there year round. Over winter and summer breaks, one of the families in the area houses me. Sometimes more than one, depending on what May can arrange. Then, of course, at some point over the summer break, the Concilium moves me to a different state and everything begins all over at a new Illustratio.”
Brooks pulled back, concern etched into his features as he scanned my face, “Wait, are you telling me you’ve been to a new school, every year since you turned five?”
I nodded, unable to voice my fears.
“That’s just...wow. No wonder you put up walls.”
My brow furrowed at his words.
He caught my expression and dropped a quick kiss to my forehead. “No frowning. Knowing helps me understand a little of your frustration. My family, my folks and my older sister, they’re all extremely...loud? Gregarious? I don’t know quite how to put it. My situation is not quite the same but enough that I kind of get it.”
He grinned at me and brushed at my hair. I rested my head back on his shoulder, for once enjoying the embrace we remained in. Surprise ran through me as I realized I wanted to know more about Brooks.