by Penny Parkes
Indefinitely.
She turned to Dan. ‘Let Henry do his job. But if he and Keira’s solicitor talk her through all the options, then it’s her decision, isn’t it? Her informed decision. And that has to be the priority here.’
It was easy to say the words, but part of her wanted to do just as Dan suggested; to sit down with Keira, and May if necessary, and tell them how much having Lulu in their lives, in their family, would mean to them – could mean to Lulu.
Perhaps if Keira saw Lulu and Dan together – ideally to see with her own eyes the almost tangible bond that had grown between them?
But these were hardly ideal circumstances; the softly-softly approach had only got them so far and now, thanks to a vicious bout of pneumonia, time was quickly running out for Keira.
Grace wound her hand into Dan’s and rested her head on his shoulder.
‘I love you,’ she whispered softly.
‘And I love you too,’ said Dan with feeling. ‘And for what it’s worth, I’m so sorry I kept blocking the idea of adoption. If only I hadn’t been so stubborn, we’d already be on the right path, had the right vetting, bought the right house . . .’ He sighed. ‘We just don’t look good on paper, Gracie.’
She genuinely thought her heart would break a little at the despondent look on his face. ‘No,’ she said. ‘I’m not doing regrets with this, Dan. Whether she comes home with us, or stays with Holly, Lulu’s a gorgeous, lost soul who’s now a part of our lives and I want to be grateful that so many lovely people are around to catch her if she falls. Isn’t that the most important thing? And yes, I would consider it a privilege to be her guardian, but also her surrogate aunt, or her friend . . .’ Her voice cracked. ‘An absolute honour to be her parent.’
Dan nodded. ‘I can’t even bear to think about what would have happened if May had just kept on pretending to cope. All those pain meds just kicking around on the kitchen worktop with a toddler in the house?’ He shuddered. ‘So really any outcome that gets Lulu into a loving family environment is better than taking her chances in The System, isn’t it?’
Grace angled her head to try and see how the meeting was going, but all she could make out were three fuzzy outlines and a conversation that sounded like Charlie Brown’s teacher.
‘Why do you think Henry wants us here?’ Dan said. ‘Do you think he knows something we don’t?’
Grace shook her head. ‘More likely the other way around, don’t you think? If time is short, then surely better that we’re on hand to answer any questions that come up?’
‘I guess you’re right. I mean, can we honestly hope to have conveyed how we feel in that stupid letter?’ Dan said.
‘It was not a stupid letter,’ Grace countered. ‘It was heartfelt. And informative. Not to mention, a necessary part of the process.’
‘It hardly scratched the surface though, did it?’ Dan said quietly.
Grace dashed a tear away from her eyes at the look of absolute love and commitment on his face. Never had she imagined that Dan falling in love with somebody else would bring them closer, strengthen their bond. But then never had she imagined a child like Lulu.
She glanced at her watch, practicalities as always keeping her sane. ‘I should probably phone Alice and warn her you might be late – see if she can stay on for your evening clinic?’
‘I’ll do it,’ Dan said. ‘It’s me asking the favour, after all, and she did seem pretty peeved earlier on. What was that about, do you think?’
Likewise, it was easier, Grace noticed, for Dan to shift his attention to the team at work, than to try and second-guess what was happening in the next room. As he talked about work, his entire posture changed, and she bit her lip, trying not to show how incredibly concerned she was. If he were so emotionally invested now, what would he do if Keira’s decision didn’t go their way?
‘. . . and then she muttered something about her mother having a point about professional growth and left!’ Dan said, shaking his head. ‘God knows what she meant.’
Grace shrugged, a little guilty that she’d completely zoned out and missed what he was saying, just like every single time she attempted to watch a weather forecast. ‘I think Alice and Tilly might be having a few adjustment issues, what with Holly coming back, and there being so much talk of change.’
‘Well, I think Tilly’s making enough changes in her personal life, don’t you?’ Dan said with an easy smile. ‘Maybe we should have a word with Holly – slow things down a bit – I know she wants to make her mark and get back into the swing of things, but . . .’
‘Don’t you dare start with that patronising waffle,’ Grace cautioned him. ‘Who better to be looking at how effectively we work, than a partner with a few months’ objectivity and five children to juggle. Not to mention Taffy. Surely Holly deserves that we hear her out, before naysaying her suggestions?’
‘Yes, boss,’ said Dan, leaning forward to pull Grace into his arms. ‘And I wasn’t naysaying – whatever she’s plotting will no doubt be well-considered, efficient and inspirational. It’s just, well, I worry that there’s only so many hours in the day.’
‘So, let her decide what to do with hers! If she can take care of that houseful and still bring a little professional scrutiny to how we plan our practice, then I for one remain in awe, not apprehension.’
Dan held Grace tightly, kissing the top of her head, as she nestled deeper into his arms, craving security.
The door swinging open beside them startled them apart, both instantly trying to read the expression on Henry’s face.
He paused a moment, almost as if for effect. ‘Well, I have news. Whether it’s good or bad rather depends on you.’ He gestured to the chairs beside them and all three sat down, as if coordinated, Grace barely managing to perch on the edge of her seat.
‘Keira likes you both,’ Henry began. ‘And she’s open to the idea of Lulu coming to live with you.’
‘Oh, thank God,’ breathed out Dan tremulously, rather getting ahead of himself.
Henry held up a cautionary hand. ‘But she has concerns. And, in my professional opinion, it would be wise to address them with some urgency.’
*
‘Holly? It’s Grace, can you talk?’ The mobile phone shook in her hand as she attempted to make her voice sound as normal as possible. After the last hour of emotional conversation at Keira’s bedside, and with her doctors, that was easier said than done.
‘Err, hang on a sec?’ Holly said in reply, sounding as though she were somehow in the middle of Piccadilly Circus during rush hour. Suddenly the cacophony went silent and Holly’s voice could actually be heard. ‘Okay – I’ve shut myself in the laundry room. I can hear you now.’
Grace laughed. ‘It’s a bit of a last-minute request actually. Do you have any plans later?’
‘I’m around, if you want to pop by. But Plum’s taken the evening off to get some quality Tilly-time.’
‘Right,’ said Grace. ‘Well, the thing is, we need you and Taffy for an hour or so – just to help with a Lulu-related thing. Two things really. Do you think the kids would mind a spontaneous evening out?’
‘I think the parents would adore an evening out, spontaneous or otherwise,’ said Holly. ‘And between us, I’m sure four adults can keep five small children in check.’ She paused. ‘Although, if I brought Elsie, we’d have a one-to-one ratio and maybe slightly better odds of finishing a sentence?’
‘Bring Elsie,’ said Grace firmly. ‘And Holly? Don’t tell anyone, will you?’
Grace hung up and missed Holly’s perplexed reply: ‘I couldn’t if I wanted to.’
‘Right,’ said Grace, turning towards Dan with sparkling eyes, ‘now it’s your turn.’ She passed him the phone and dashed away the tears that were quickly filling her eyes; it had been an afternoon of poignant turbulence, and the day wasn’t even over yet.
*
Grace clasped Dan’s hand tightly. Now that this was actually happening, knowing that Taffy and Holly and their maraud
ing clan were on their way, the time for nerves had surely passed.
‘No cold feet?’ Dan asked gently.
‘Toasty warm,’ she replied. ‘And, actually, I cannot think of a better reason to get married, can you?’
‘Like generations before us,’ he agreed. ‘Even if our “baby” will be sitting in the congregation. And isn’t actually ours.’
‘Yet,’ Grace reminded him. ‘Three small things, remember? Three small reservations that we can so easily remedy to give Keira peace of mind.’
‘And we’d be doing this one sooner or later though anyway, yes?’ Dan clarified, concerned that he might be railroading his putative bride down the aisle.
‘Well, I was rather hoping to live in sin for an unbelievably decadent amount of time, but this works too,’ she teased him. ‘And frankly it is about time we stopped procrastinating about where we’re going to live. Renting Holly’s old house was never meant to be a permanent solution.’
They paused then, fingers entwined, both obviously thinking back to the third ‘small thing’ that Keira had asked of them.
There was no doubt that getting married and building a steady home life would help with that too. When the time came.
Dan turned to Grace, his eyes filled with his love and admiration for the woman standing beside him. ‘One step at a time, okay? And no steps that make us feel uncomfortable. Deal?’
‘Deal,’ replied Grace, kicking off her heels to prove her commitment to the cause. ‘No uncomfortable steps.’
The ancient church doors swung open with a creak, silhouetting the gaggle of children and adults in the doorway.
‘And I thought Holly and I had the monopoly on shotgun weddings around here!’ called Taffy, his eyes creased up in a smile and striding forward to shake his best friend’s hand.
‘Thanks for coming,’ Dan replied. ‘We could hardly have done this without you here.’
‘Oh, I don’t know. I think it’s more important that you and your barefoot bride show up,’ he said, noticing Grace’s lack of shoes and looking confused. ‘Is this some clever wordplay on barefoot and pregnant that I’m missing?’
‘Nope,’ said Grace with a smile. ‘It’s all about comfort.’
‘Oh well, in that case,’ said Holly, slipping her own heels from her feet in solidarity.
Tom tugged at her sleeve impatiently. ‘Mummy, Mummy – if it’s a shotgun wedding, can Ben and I go home and get our Nerf guns?’
Grace swallowed a smile. ‘Maybe later?’ she offered.
‘Now, are we ready, ladies and gentlemen?’ asked Reverend Taylor, stepping out of the vestry in a crisp white cassock. ‘Are we expecting anyone else?’
‘No,’ said Grace. ‘Just our nearest and dearest for a little moral support.’
‘Well, since you obviously all remember me reading the banns for this lovely couple,’ Reverend Taylor gave her mini-congregation a complicit smile, ‘I will waste no time in joining together two of my favourite people in Holy Matrimony.’
There was a loud creak as the door of the church was pushed open again, and Hattie, Will and Lizzie slipped inside, any attempts at discretion utterly failing. ‘Sorry, sorry, don’t mind us, we just couldn’t bear to miss this,’ said Lizzie in a stage whisper.
‘Word’s got out,’ murmured Taffy, standing beside Dan as his Best Man.
‘Welcome one, welcome all,’ said Reverend Taylor. ‘Now, as I was saying—’
‘Are we too late? Did we miss it?’ said the Major, as he and Marion pushed open the door a little wider, with much groaning of its ancient hinges. ‘Only, there’s a rumour in the pub—’ He stopped dead, as a huge smile lit up his face. ‘As you were, Reverend.’
‘Quite, well, yes. Anyway. We are gathered here today to bring together this man and this— Oh, for the love of God, leave the bloody door open, otherwise we may never get to the good bit!’ the Reverend burst out, with uncharacteristic frustration, as three of the nurses from The Practice peeked into the church, with Charlotte Lansing and Banana incongruously on their heels.
‘Do you, Dan Milton Carter take this woman to be your wedded wife – in sickness and health . . .’
‘I do,’ he said simply, holding Grace’s gaze with his own, his eyes filled with adoration.
‘This is even better than the Royal Wedding,’ sniffed Elsie tearfully in the front row, rootling around in her handbag for a handkerchief and momentarily letting go of Lulu’s hand.
Grace paused, still trying not to laugh at the discovery of Dan’s much-hated, and long-concealed, poetic middle name, trying to compose herself for her own ‘I do’. She felt, more than saw, the tiny presence standing beside her and glanced down, losing any hope of composure as she saw Lulu’s face smiling up at her.
‘Me too?’ she said adorably, reaching out her hands to take Grace’s and Dan’s, standing between them in her little yellow dress.
There was an outbreak of scuffling from the pews, as one and all took a few deep, calming breaths. Certainly from the back of the church it was a sight to behold.
Flickering candles from the Advent wreath reflected in the stained-glass windows, illuminating the couple at the front, joined together or so it seemed, by a tiny figure in primrose yellow.
‘I do,’ said Grace when her moment arrived, not a trace of nerves or reservation in her voice, not so much bringing together two soulmates, as three.
‘You may now kiss the bride!’ said Reverend Taylor, herself a little overcome.
‘Me too!’ cried Lulu again, hopping up and down excitedly, until the entire, ever-expanding congregation burst into spontaneous cheers and applause.
‘That went well, Mrs Carter,’ said Dan smiling, as he lovingly rested his forehead against Grace’s.
‘I could get used to this,’ said Grace with feeling, unable to pinpoint whether she meant Dan’s absolute focus and admiration, or the tiny hand woven into her own. From where she was standing, the two ideas were inseparable, as indeed family should be.
Chapter 40
‘Oh, I do love a good wedding,’ said Elsie, still emotionally fragile three hours later, as the impromptu reception continued apace in the kitchen at Number 42. ‘Although a little advance notice around here to buy a hat on occasion would be nice.’
Hattie had nipped back to The Deli and returned bearing sufficient lasagnes to feed the five thousand and Teddy Kingsley had closed down the pub for the night and turned up with enough fizz to lubricate them all very nicely.
All the children had been duly bathed and pyjama-d, and were now mingling among the grown-ups, snaffling hugs, treats and attention as though by right.
‘How’re you feeling?’ asked Holly, intrigued as she topped up Grace’s glass, taking in her flushed cheeks.
‘A bit shell-shocked, to be honest. And here was me, thinking I would never take the plunge again,’ Grace said quietly. ‘But actually, when we were taking our vows, it just felt right, you know?’
‘I guess it depends on the motivation,’ Holly replied.
‘I think you might be right,’ Grace agreed. ‘Even though the whole situation is a little bittersweet. Poor Keira. I daren’t think what she must be going through.’
‘How about you focus on how much you’re helping her? Surely it’s better for everyone if Lulu has a loving home to go to,’ Holly said gently.
Grace nodded. ‘And you’re quite sure you don’t mind? I know there was a chance that Lulu might have stayed with you, and she’s settled here so well . . .’
‘I’d like to think that Number 42 might be her home-away-from-home sometimes. I mean, if you ever need a babysitter? I’m sure Aunty Holly and Uncle Taffy could be relied upon?’ Holly hoped she made it sound as though she were completely adjusted to the new plan, but she couldn’t pretend she hadn’t been a little taken aback.
Only last night, as Lulu had been having one of her nightmares and Holly held her in her arms, she’d decided that there would always be a home for her here, an extra stocking o
n the mantelpiece this Christmas. And Keira had all but asked her to step up.
Knowing that raising four children would be hard enough didn’t seem to be the barrier it had once been. The more she got to know Lulu and her sweet little quirks, the less of an issue it became.
But now . . .
Now, two of her best friends were offering Lulu a home – a loving home. Choosing to adapt their lives to accommodate her, become a family. She really couldn’t be happier, she told herself, taking another flute of champagne and drinking it down in one gulp.
‘I have no idea how we’re going to find a home so quickly, either,’ Grace continued, almost oblivious to Holly’s mental machinations. ‘I mean, we’ve been looking for a doer-upper for months now. And nothing. But it means the world to Keira, apparently, that we’re homeowners, not renters.’
‘Maybe she’s had one eviction too many in her own life and doesn’t want that for her daughter?’ Holly suggested astutely. ‘But be careful what you buy, if you’re buying in a rush, won’t you?’
‘Of course,’ said Grace. ‘How are you getting on with your new neighbours? Have you even met them yet?’
‘Ah, well, about that—’ Holly began, before Elsie fixed her with a querulous glare.
‘The whole place needed a complete gutting,’ Grace blundered on. ‘We went to look round it actually. We reckon the old chap who lived there before lived in absolute squalor. Lost out to sealed bids in the end,’ Grace confided. ‘There can’t be a room in the place that they haven’t gutted based on the workmen coming and going. My money says they won’t even move in; they’ll just gut it and flip it.’
‘Have you been watching those property programmes again?’ asked Elsie calmly, not rising to the bait.
‘Oh I love those!’ exclaimed Grace, obviously more tipsy than she’d realised, as she surprised even herself. ‘But then it makes it all the more disappointing when you go house-hunting yourself and it’s all vile. Expensive and vile!’
‘What’s the rush, though?’ Elsie asked. ‘Surely you need to acclimatise to married life, before you take on the stress of a building project? It’s not easy, you know. Trust me.’