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Here it comes. "Yes, maam. "
"Shes been praying for your mother to recover from her cancer. She even has a little altar set up in her room. "
Tully looked at the floor, too ashamed to answer. How could she explain why shed lied? No answer would be good enough, not for a mother like Mrs. Mularkey, who loved her kids. At that, a wave of jealousy joined the shame running through her. Maybe if Tully had had a mother who loved her she wouldnt find it so easy—so necessary—to lie in the first place. And now shed lose the one thing that mattered to her: Katie.
"Do you think lying to your friends is okay?"
"No, maam. " So intently was she staring at the floor that she was startled by a gentle touch on her chin that forced her to look up.
"Are you going to be a good friend to Kate? Or the kind that leads her to trouble?"
"Id never hurt Katie. " Tully wanted to say more, maybe fall to her knees and swear to be a good person, but she was so close to tears she didnt dare move. She stared into Mrs. Mularkeys dark eyes and saw something she never expected: understanding.
In the living room, Cloud stumbled over to the television and changed the channel. Tully could see the screen through the rubble of the messy room: Jean Enersen was reporting on the days top story.
"You do it, dont you?" Mrs. Mularkey said quietly, as if she worried that Cloud might be eavesdropping. "Pay the bills, grocery-shop, clean the house. Who pays for everything?"
Tully swallowed hard. No one had ever seen through her life so clearly before. "My grandmother sends a check every week. "
"My dad was a fall-down drunk and the whole town knew it," Mrs. Mularkey said in a soft voice that matched the look in her eyes. "He was mean, too. Friday and Saturday nights, my sister, Georgia, would have to go to the tavern and drag him home. All the way out of the bar hed be smacking her and calling her names. She was like one of those rodeo clowns, always stepping between the bull and the cowboy. By the end of my junior year I figured out why she ran with the fast crowd and drank too much. "
"She didnt want people to look at her like she was pitiful. "
Mrs. Mularkey nodded. "She hated that look. What matters, though, isnt other people. Thats what I learned. Who your mom is and how she lives her life isnt a reflection of you. You can make your own choices. And theres nothing for you to be ashamed of. But youll have to dream big, Tully. " She glanced through the open door to the living room. "Like that Jean Enersen on the TV there. A woman who gets to a place like that in her life knows how to go after what she wants. "
"How do I know what I want?"
"You keep your eyes open and do the right thing. Go to college. And trust your friends. "
"I do trust Kate. "
"So youll tell her the truth?"
"What if I just promise—"
"One of us is going to tell her, Tully. It should be you. "
Tully took a deep breath and released it. Though telling the truth went against every instinct she had, she had no choice, really. She wanted Mrs. Mularkey to be proud of her. "Okay. "
"Good. So Ill see you for dinner tomorrow night. Five oclock. Itll be your chance to start over. "
The next night, Tully changed her clothes at least four times, trying to find exactly the right outfit. By the time she was actually ready, she was so late that she had to run all the way across the street and up the hill.
Kates mom opened the door. She wore a pair of purple gabardine bell-bottoms and a striped V-neck sweater with angel sleeves. Smiling, she said, "I warn you, its loud and crazy in here. "
"I love loud and crazy," Tully said.
"Then youll fit right in. " Mrs. Mularkey put an arm around Tullys shoulder and led her toward the beige-walled living room with its moss-green shag carpeting, bright red sofa, and black recliner. A small gold-framed photo of Jesus and another of Elvis were the only decorations on the walls, but dozens of family pictures cluttered the top of the console TV. Tully couldnt help thinking of the TV in her house; its top was covered with overflowing ashtrays and empty cigarette packs, but no family photos.
"Bud?" Mrs. Mularkey said to the beefy, dark-haired man sitting in the recliner. "This is Tully Hart from next door. "
Mr. Mularkey smiled at her and put down his drink. "Well, well. So youre the one weve been hearin about. Its nice to have you here, Tully. "
"Its nice to be here. "
Mrs. Mularkey patted her shoulder. "Dinners not till six. Katies upstairs in her room. Its the one at the very top of the stairs. Im sure you girls have plenty to talk about. "
Tully got the message and nodded, unable to rouse her voice. Now that she was here, in this warm house that smelled of home-cooked meals, standing shoulder to shoulder with the worlds most perfect mom, she couldnt imagine losing it all, becoming unwelcome. "Ill never lie to her again," she promised.
"Good. Now go. " With a last smile, Mrs. Mularkey walked into the living room.
Mr. Mularkey put an arm around his wife and drew her into the La-Z-Boy with him. Immediately they bent their heads together.
Tully felt a longing so sharp and unexpected, she couldnt move. Everything would have been different for her if shed had a family like this. She didnt want to turn away from it just yet. "Are you watching the news?"
Mr. Mularkey looked up. "We never miss it. "
Mrs. Mularkey smiled. "Jean Enersen is changing the world. Shes one of the first women to anchor a nightly news program. "
"Im going to be a reporter," Tully said suddenly.
"Thats wonderful," Mr. Mularkey said.
"There you are," Kate said suddenly, coming up beside her. "Nice of everyone to tell me you were here," she said loudly.
"I was just telling your mom and dad that Im going to be a news reporter," Tully said.
Mrs. Mularkey beamed at that. In her smile, Tully saw everything that had been missing in her life. "Isnt that a grand dream, Katie?"
Kate looked confused for a moment. Then she hooked her arm through Tullys and pulled her away from the living room and up the stairs. In her small attic bedroom, Kate went to the record player and flipped through a small stack of records. By the time shed chosen one—Carole Kings Tapestry—and put it on, Tully was at the window, staring out at the lavender evening.
The surge of adrenaline shed gotten from her announcement faded, leaving a quiet kind of sadness behind. She knew what she had to do now, but the thought of it made her sick.
Tell her the truth.
If you dont, Mrs. Mularkey will.
"I got the new Seventeen and Tiger Beat," Kate said, stretching out on the blue shag carpeting. "You want to read em? We can take the Can You Be Tony DeFrancos Girlfriend? quiz. "
Tully lay down beside her. "Sure. "
"Jan-Michael Vincent is so foxy," Kate said, flipping to a picture of the actor.
"I heard he lied to his girlfriend," Tully said, daring a sideways glance.
"I hate liars. " Kate turned the page. "Are you really going to be a news reporter? You never told me that. "
"Yeah," Tully said, really imagining it for the first time. Maybe she could be famous. Then everyone would admire her. "Youll have to be one, too, though. Cause we do everything together. "
"Me?"
"Well be a team like Woodward and Bernstein, only with better clothes. And prettier. "
"I dont know—"
Tully bumped her. "Yes, you do. Mrs. Ramsdale told the whole class that youre an excellent writer. "
Kate laughed. "Thats true. Okay. Ill be a reporter, too. "
"When we get famous, well tell Mike Wallace we couldnt have done it without each other. "
After that, they fell silent, flipping through the magazines. Tully tried twice to bring up the subject of her mother, but both times Kate interrupted her, and then someone was yelling, "Dinner," and her chance for coming clean had slipped away.
All through the best meal of her life, she felt the weight of her lie. By the time
"Hey, Mom," Kate said, putting away the last white CorningWare plate, "Tully and me are going to ride our bikes down to the park, okay?"
"Tully and I," her mother answered, reaching down into the magazine pouch of the La-Z-Boys arm for the TV guide. "And be back by eight. "
"Aww, Mom—"
"Eight," her father said from the living room.
Kate looked at Tully. "They treat me like Im a baby. "
"You dont know how lucky you are. Come on, lets get our bikes. "
They rode at a breakneck speed down the bumpy county road, laughing all the way. At Summer Hill, Tully flung her arms out and Kate followed.
When they got to the river park, they ditched their bikes in the trees and lay on the grass, side by side, staring up at the sky, listening to the river gurgling against the rocks.
"I have something to tell you," Tully said in a rush.
"What?"
"My mom doesnt have cancer. Shes a pothead. "
"Your mom smokes dope. Yeah, right. "
"Its true. Shes always high. "
Kate turned to her. "Really?"
"Really. "
"You lied to me?"
Tully could barely maintain eye contact, she was so ashamed. "I didnt mean to. "
"People dont lie accidentally. Its not like tripping over a crack in the sidewalk. "
"You dont know how it feels to be embarrassed by your mom. "
"Are you kidding? You should have seen what my mom wore out to dinner last—"
"No," Tully said. "You dont know. "
"Tell me. "
Tully knew what Kate was asking of her; she wanted the truth that had spawned the lie, but Tully didnt know if she could do it, turn all her pain into words and pass them out like cards. All her life shed kept these secrets close. If she told Kate the reality and then lost her as a friend, it would be unbearable.
Then again, if she didnt tell the truth, shed lose the friendship for sure.
"I was two years old," she finally said, "when my mom first dumped me at my grandparents house. She went to town for milk and came back when I was four. When I was ten, she showed up again and I thought it meant she loved me. That time she let go of me in a crowd. The next time I saw her I was fourteen. My grans letting us live in this house and sending us money every week. Thatll last until my mom bails again—which she will do. "
"I dont understand. "
"Of course you dont. My mom isnt like yours. This is the longest amount of time Ive ever spent with her. Sooner or later shell get bored and move on without me. "
"How can a mother do that?"
Tully shrugged. "I think theres something wrong with me. "
"Theres nothing wrong with you. Shes the loser. But I still dont get why you lied to me. "
Tully finally looked at her. "I wanted you to like me. "
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