by Lori Foster
Her eyes widened again, but he was already there, already moving up over her, gently easing her down onto the mattress while wedging himself firmly between her soft, spread thighs. He closed his eyes, relishing the feel of her beneath him, the gentle cradle of her open body. Pressing his hips down and in, he moved against her, torturing himself with the pleasure of it.
“Alec?” Her voice was high and thin.
“What if that’s not what I want the most, Celia?” He felt his heart drumming, his stomach twisting with need. “What then?”
She swallowed hard, the sound audible in the quiet room. She blinked twice before squarely meeting his gaze. “I can’t give up on Hannah.”
His senses ignited, heat rushing over him in waves. All he could think was that she was giving in to him, she wanted him to make love to her.
He leaned down to kiss her, already breathless with anticipation—and a knock sounded on the door.
His head jerked up and his entire body went rigid as he instinctively prepared for the possible threat.
“Room service!”
Several curses came to mind, but it was Celia scrambling out from beneath him, her panic almost tangible as she leapt from the bed and rushed back into the bathroom, that helped him maintain control. Once again, that door was slammed.
Alec flopped down on the bed and flung one arm over his eyes. Tonight wasn’t going at all as planned.
And given what had just almost happened, he had a feeling it was going to get a lot worse before it got better. Typical, whenever he dealt with Celia.
* * *
CELIA SLOWLY CHEWED on her sandwich. She didn’t really want it, not when nothing had been settled between them. She felt like an idiot for fleeing to the bathroom again. At least this time Alec hadn’t abused the door to get her out. He’d merely asked her if she was ready to eat, and she’d calmly walked out as if she hadn’t been hiding. Dumb. She had to get a grip if she wanted to talk him into helping her.
The noisy air conditioner in her room barely took the edge off the heat. The air felt heavy, thick. The food tasted bland to her nervous tongue. Alec sat across from her at the small, scarred table wedged into the corner of the room. There was barely space to move between it and the edge of the bed. He’d sat so that he faced the door, a conscious decision on his part because Alec was always alert, always prepared. With him, she had no doubt she could save Hannah.
But Alec kept looking at her with his narrow-eyed gaze, speculating, just waiting to start grilling her and putting her on the spot. She decided to beat him to the punch. The key to dealing with Alec was to stay in control.
She cleared her throat, took a large swallow of the coffee, then looked him dead in the eye.
Sheesh, he was gorgeous.
“Come on, honey, out with it.” Alec grinned slightly, one eyebrow lifted. “I can see you have something to say, so say it.”
Celia scowled. “How do you do that?”
“Read your mind?” He tugged at his earring absently. “I don’t know, except that we’ve got some kind of chemistry going, whether you want to admit it or not.”
She lowered her eyes. “Actually, that’s part of my…um, problem.”
“Your sexual problem?”
Heat rushed into her cheeks. She hated the way he just blurted that out, but she knew he was deliberately rattling her, so she lifted her chin and again forced herself to meet his gaze. “Yes.”
Alec took a healthy bite of his own sandwich, taking his time while he chewed and swallowed. “Didn’t seem to me like you had a problem.” His attention dropped to her breasts and her nipples immediately peaked. His eyes narrowed. “Everything appears to be working just fine.”
She had to lock her knees to keep from running away again. She was so ashamed of herself, it was all she could do to sit there and face him. “That’s part of the problem.”
Now he looked surprised, and a tad annoyed. He swallowed the last of his food and glared. “Come again?”
Fiddling with the spoon for her coffee just to give her fingers something to do, Celia admitted, “I’m not very discriminating. I suppose I’m what’s called a loose woman.” She felt his gaze like a laser burn and this time she couldn’t look up.
“A loose woman?”
Something in his tone sounded lethal and she braced herself. “After the way I let Raymond use me, putting so many people in danger, I decided I would never again get involved with a man who didn’t really care about me. I thought I had learned my lesson, that my pride was enough to keep me from being foolish. But…” She swallowed hard, searching for the right words. “You…you look at me, and I forget all my convictions.”
“This is all because you want me?” He sounded irritated and a little disbelieving.
“I want you. But not for the right reasons.”
Alec shot out of his chair and she braced herself, watching him wide-eyed. Rather than come to her, he stalked away, his hands on his hips, his shoulders rigid. Through the tight T-shirt, she could clearly see every muscle of his back.
“Alec, when we first met you made it clear you didn’t want a relationship. Every time we’re together you make it clear that you don’t trust me, that you don’t even really like me.”
He whipped around to stare at her, incredulous.
She faltered just a bit, but her gut instincts toward Hannah couldn’t be ignored. “You just want me for sex, and as much as my body might like the idea, my brain is disgusted and ashamed.”
“Your brain?” He started toward her, slowly stalking, his eyes narrowed and intent on her face.
She quickly slid out of her chair and stepped behind it. The crowded room gave her little enough space to navigate. “Stop trying to intimidate me! I hate it when you do that, especially when I’m only trying to give you the truth.”
“The truth being that you have some harebrained idea that sex without love everlasting is dirty?”
He stopped in front of her, towering, angry. Celia pushed the chair aside and pointed her finger at him, her own anger taking over. “Sex without some kind of emotional commitment is dirty! It’s just sex.”
“Which can be damn satisfying!”
“Not for me!” She realized they were both screaming and tried to calm herself. Good grief, she didn’t want to run him off, and she certainly didn’t want everyone in the motel to know their personal business. She pushed a hand through her wet hair and took several deep breaths. “I’m sorry for sort of leading you on. You kiss me, and I forget what I’m doing and what it is I want to do. I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t touch me anymore.”
“Like hell.”
Celia ignored that. “I have a lot to make up for, Alec, mostly because I was blinded by Raymond and who he was. And the reason I was so blinded—”
“I don’t want to hear this, damn it.”
“Is because sex between us was—” She almost choked, then forced the words out. “It was great.”
“Goddammit.” Alec’s hand grabbed her arms and pulled her up on tiptoe. “Celia—”
Whatever he was going to say was cut off by the loud beeping of her pager. They both froze for a moment, and Alec seemed to be vibrating with anger, struggling for control. Celia waited, practically hanging in his grip, though strangely not worried. For whatever reason, this time she didn’t fear him. Alec would never hurt her, and she knew it.
He slowly released her until her feet touched flat on the floor. She rushed over to the dresser where her beeper lay. She hadn’t taken it with her to the bar, too afraid it would go off and Jacobs would discover something that would give her away. She picked it up and read the number blinking at her with a distinct feeling of dread.
Biting her lip, she turned to face Alec.
“Who is it?” He had himself under control, but it was a tenuous hold. Everything he felt was still there in his glittering black eyes, plain for her to see. From the inside out, she felt the trembling start.
Watching him closely,
she said, “It’s…Mrs. Barrington.”
Alec turned away, but Celia was already rushing to him, personal reservations forgotten in the face of Hannah’s need. “Alec?” When he didn’t answer she shifted around so she was in front of him and he had no choice but to listen to her. “Please, I need your help with this case. Hannah needs your help.” She ignored his snort of disbelief and continued. “I have to call her back. Alec? Please, will you stay and help me?”
He stared at the ceiling for a good full minute, not answering. Celia could feel his indecision and she held herself still, allowing him to decide while at the same time hoping against hope that he wouldn’t turn her down.
Finally he looked at her, and she’d never seen him harder, more determined. Her heartbeat shuddered, then began a rapid tattoo.
“Yeah, Celia, I’ll stay. I’ll help you save little Hannah Barrington, whether the girl wants saving or not.” He looked her over, his gaze more cold than hot now. “But there’s a condition.”
Despite his cynical, detached attitude, a warmth spread through her, proof of what she’d already guessed, what she’d always known, exactly what he’d want in return. Her legs felt shaky, but she lifted her chin and returned his direct stare, bravado her only defense. “I’m listening.”
His eyelids drooped sensually, his thick lashes almost hiding his gaze as he stared at first her mouth, then her breasts, then lower. His tone was soft, a raw growl that made her every nerve ending tingle with awareness. “I want you. Whenever and wherever I decide. Any way I choose to take you—” His gaze lifted, meeting hers again. “—and I’ll choose a hell of a lot of ways. You’ll say yes. Until this is over, until Hannah is on her way home, you’ll be mine.”
Celia rolled her lips in to contain a moan, unable to look away, unable to say a single word. Damn, but she was almost relieved. He was going to take the decision out of her hands, and her belly curled in anticipation even as she feared her own response.
Alec smirked, the gesture sensual and ripe with promise. “Oh no, honey,” he whispered, “I’m not going to let you play at being a martyr. I’m going to make damn sure you enjoy every little thing I do to you, with no holding back. Whatever the hell you did with Raymond won’t be able to compare. And when I’m done, you’ll know damn good and well that nothing between us is dirty.”
His hands cupped her hot cheeks and turned her face up to his. “You can call Mrs. Barrington and tell her not to worry, that everything will be taken care of.” His thumb brushed her bottom lip, hot and rough. “And then you can strip those jeans off and get into bed.”
She gasped.
“Or you can tell me to go to hell.” His eyes glittered, bright with intent. “The decision is yours.”
Celia licked her dry lips, trying to find words around the wild racing of her heart. He hadn’t even really touched her yet and she felt ready to lose control. How would she ever survive? Did she have any choice?
“I’ll…I’ll call Mrs. Barrington.”
His eyes blazed with sudden heat at her acceptance, his nostrils flaring in excitement, like a wild animal sensing victory. For just a heartbeat his hands tightened and she thought her time of reckoning was at hand, that he’d lost control. Then he stepped away. “I have to get a few things out of my truck. I can stay with you tonight, because everyone expected it. But tomorrow I’ll have to get my own room just in case anyone has the sense to check up on you.”
Celia stood mute, watching him.
“Go ahead and make your call. In the morning, I’ll figure how out we’re going to handle things.”
She watched him leave the room, his body moving with fluid grace and blatant strength. She didn’t bother asking what they’d do tonight. She already knew.
She drew in a shuddering breath, tamped down on her guilt and shame while telling herself she was only doing what was necessary. Then she reached for the phone. She didn’t want to be occupied when Alec returned; she didn’t want to have to disrobe in front of him.
She’d be in the bed, hiding under the covers.
Everything else was up to him.
CHAPTER FIVE
ALEC LINGERED in the parking lot for several reasons.
First and foremost, he had to get control of himself. Holding out a hand, he stared in disgust at the trembling in his own body, a body usually so cold nothing affected it, certainly not a woman. For years, too many to count, he’d been able to take pleasure in a woman’s body, to give pleasure back, without letting it get to him.
He felt damn affected now, and he hadn’t even really touched the little witch. Heaven help him when he got himself buried deep inside her, when he felt the hot wet clasp of her body, heard her half-frightened, mostly excited moans…
Cursing, he paced furiously around his truck, trying to outrun the truth of his feelings. She did fear him a little, and for now, nothing would change that. He didn’t even want to change it because although he made her nervous, she still wanted him, almost as much as he wanted her. He knew having sex with Celia would blow his mind out, and the knowing was almost worse than the actual effects. Like a drug he knew could destroy him, he wanted her anyway. Being as cold and indifferent as possible was his only defense.
But when she looked up at him with those innocent hazel eyes, he wanted to protect her, even from himself. And that was another reason he hesitated.
He should have killed Raymond; killing him would make Alec feel a whole lot better now. She’d said sex between them had been great. He squeezed his eyes shut and considered howling at the moon. The words, and her tortured look that had accompanied them, filled him with such a killing rage, he knew he’d have to do whatever he could to erase that bastard from her body, from her soul. If she didn’t thank him in the beginning, she would by the end. He had to believe that.
Knowing he’d stalled long enough, that Celia could well be trying to sneak out the tiny bathroom window, he grabbed his gear from his truck and headed back in. Every muscle in his body felt tight and strained, his jaw locked, his mind in turmoil. The hard-on he’d learned to associate with any close proximity to Celia throbbed insistently. He hated needing her like this. He hated to need anyone.
Half expecting the door to be locked now, he was taken aback when it swung open easily and he found Celia lying wide-eyed in the narrow bed—very obviously naked beneath all the blankets.
The covers were pulled so high, even her chin was hidden, with her rounded eyes looking almost comical over the hem. Twin sets of slender fingers gripped the blankets on either side of her mouth. A strange feeling, like mingled tenderness and raging lust, rushed through him, making him light-headed, almost dizzy with triumph and hunger. He liked seeing her in a bed, waiting for him. Oh yeah, he liked it a lot. Too damn much.
His mouth kicked up in a crooked smile as he dropped his overnight bag on the floor and put his pistol on the bedside table. Celia’s eyes rounded even more at the sight of the weapon.
“You carry a…a gun?”
He gave her a level look, amazed at her naiveté. “All the agents do, Celia.”
“I don’t…That is…should I?”
Alec shook his head, astounded that a feeling as light as amusement could touch him now when he could feel the furious drumming of his heart. “Hell no. One leg wound is enough for me.”
“I didn’t shoot you!”
He started to sit on the side of the bed, then thought better of it. If he got that close, all his plans would end before they could begin. He wasn’t ready yet. He needed at least a few more minutes to shore up his determination.
He stepped back a few paces and leaned on the wall, watching her. “I can think of a dozen times in the last few hours when you might have.”
“Well…” She considered that, then shrugged in resignation. “Yeah.”
His gaze sharpened and he deliberately used a tone he knew drew attention from hired killers. “You don’t need a weapon, sweetheart, because after this, you won’t be taking any more dangero
us cases.”
Her fingers tightened on the blankets and her eyes narrowed. But thankfully, for his peace of mind, she kept silent.
Still holding her gaze, Alec reached down and unbuckled his belt. Celia blinked hard, her gaze skimming down his body then immediately shooting back up again in a visibly desperate bid to stay on his face. With a whistling sound, the leather belt slid out of the jean loops and he draped it over the back of a chair.
“Alec?” Her voice was a squeak, anxious and embarrassed and if he was any judge, turned-on. “What are we going to do about Hannah? Do you have a plan?”
He pulled his shirt over his head and heard her soft groan. “I have several plans, sweetheart. Why don’t we talk about my plan for tonight, for right now?” After tossing the shirt aside he scratched his bare chest and saw her fascinated gaze. Very softly, he asked, “You want details?”
“No…yes…no.”
He grinned. “Indecisive, aren’t we? Well, I think I want to tell you anyway.”
“Alec, I think—”
“You think sex is dirty, I know.”
She squeezed her eyes closed and for a brief cowardly moment pulled the blankets over her head. Seconds later she jerked it down again to stare at him.
Celia was no coward.
“Okay.” She drew a deep fortifying breath. “What are you going to do, Alec?”
She had to be smothering under all those blankets. The cheap motel had inadequate air, and though the air conditioner rattled and hummed loudly, it couldn’t keep up with the oppressive July heat. Alec had already begun to sweat, but then, that had a lot to do with Celia being so close and naked.
Toeing off his low boots then bending to remove his socks, he said, “I’m going to let you get familiar with my body.”
“Oh…”
Hearing the trembling in her tone nearly did him in. He’d always considered himself a strong man; physically he knew it was true, but mentally, emotionally, she had him concerned. He couldn’t think of a single challenge he’d ever backed away from, and he always accepted knowing he’d win, his confidence never wavering. But he didn’t know if he was strong enough to do this tonight. He hoped so, because Miss Celia Carter was in desperate need of a few lessons, and damned if he’d let any other man give them to her.