by Jiny Lee
After the conversation with Jacques, Nergui asked me to follow him alone. I went with him to a quiet place and turned off the radio for a moment as he asked me to.
When we entered an empty room where no one could hear us, he started to talk.
'Mr. Endy. I'm telling you this because I can see that you're the only one who'd truly act out of your own will and not out of any benefits. I want you to listen very carefully. You can tell what I'm about to say to others or you can choose not to tell anyone. That's all up to you. Would you be willing to listen?' he said and I said I would.
'I'm positive that the experiment is a success and the subjects in the chamber must be invulnerable to the sunlight. And every one of you will shortly be the same by a single shot of the serum. But there are two things that I'm currently concerned about. First, I can't guarantee that it would not cause any side effect on your friends from outside the wall. The guy called Jacques said he was doing all this for the sake of the people in the building but I've lived long enough to see so many people change their words when they face the cruel truth,' he said.
I asked him, 'What truth? What side effect? What are you talking about?'
He said, 'Whether you have already guessed or not, the serum is not for turning you into an ordinary human being. It is for making you into a creature that is superior to the ordinary humans in many ways and invulnerability to the sunlight is only a small part of its expected effects.'
'What do you mean? You said it's a cure?' I asked.
'It's a cure in a way. You'll become free from the sun and free from the most of the illnesses in the world. Think of how things will change after this. You'll be free to move around at day time. You won't have to be hiding under the roof all the time. You can finally get out of this building and you'll be free to perform whatever an ordinary people may consider impossible. I know you've been thinking of the building as your prison and I'm giving you the key to open the gate,' he said.
'Okay, I get it. But isn't that a good thing? What do you mean by the side effect?' I asked.
He said, 'Unfortunately, I can't be sure it wouldn't cause any problem to the people who you call day walkers. Nothing is sure yet, but it is highly likely that many of the people from the city will develop the same symptoms as the creatures you have met on your way here.'
'Then we should tell them! We have to warn them about it! What's the problem with that?' I exclaimed. Then he continued talking to me in a low voice.
'Mr. Endy, people are selfish. They are weak and they fear the beings that are beyond their controls. They are vulnerable, but they are ruthless at the same time. That's the second thing that I'm worried about. If they learned that they could be turned into monsters and die, what do you think they would do? They'd choose to stand against you. They would simply be able to tear you down and bring the extinction your kind with no hesitation. All my centuries of effort would turn into nothing and you and your dear friend would perish,' he said.
'Wait, So you're telling me that we should not tell them in advance because they'll choose to stand against us? How can you say that?' I asked him again.
He said, 'How can I say that? It's easy. When you saw the creatures on your way here, What did you do? Did you let them go? Did you spare their lives and let them eat you alive? No you didn't. You killed them before they killed you. I'll ask you the same question. How can you be so sure that the visitors won't do the same to you when they confront the risk of their extinction?'
He was right about one thing. People would do anything not to be killed. And I couldn't blame him for making the serum, either. He made it to fix us. It was only that he had no idea if the day walkers would be in the building. Even if he had known, it wouldn't have changed his mind to stop making the serum, though.
'But, can't you do something about it? Isn't there any way to prevent them from being infected?' I asked.
'Unfortunately, not,' he said. 'There's no way that I can prevent them from being infected. Mr. Endy, all I care about is the people in the building and not the visitors from outside of it. And I'm telling you this to inform you and to give you a choice' he said.
'What choice?' I asked him, and he said, 'A choice between whether to tell them or not to tell them.'
Before I say anything to him, Fox came out and asked me if everything was alright. I tried to say something but words didn't get out of tongue. Instead, Nergui said to Fox.
'Everything's alright. I was just telling Mr. Endy about the expected results. Let's go back to the waiting room. I think it's about time.'
We went back to the waiting room. Nergui said that the sisters would soon wake up and the serum could cure our extreme sensitivity to the sunlight and it could also make us better in many ways. Our wounds would heal faster, our muscles would operate twice to three times stronger, and we'd live about twice longer than ordinary people. But he didn't say anything about the possibility that the day walkers would turn into the monstrous creatures.
And of course, Jacques and Bertie was listening to him, too. Jacques looked deeply lost in thoughts.
'And what about you? Can you also be cured?' asked Alex.
'Unfortunately, no. I won't be affected by it. My body has gone beyond the point where I can fix it. I don't have much time left. Only if I could see the end of the curse that I caused, I'd be happy to close my eyes,' he answered.
And just then, the chambers made a noise to indicate the subjects woke up.
I rushed to the chamber and stood beside Diane. The cover of the chamber opened automatically and I saw Diane open her eyes.
Tears rushed out from my eyes. I couldn't say any of the prepared words. I just stood there and cried. Diane propped herself up and stared at me. She smiled with tears in her eyes. We stared each other without saying anything. I held her in my arms. The other members of the team made space for us. They checked the other sisters that just woke up in the chambers.
'You have to get your hair cut. You look like Danny,' said Diane. I laughed. I missed her voice so much. I missed her sense of humor so much. I said, 'Welcome back,' and she said, 'Let's go home.' I said, 'Yes, we're going home.'
I was just so happy to see her back. I couldn't think about anything else. Her smile made everything meaningless. I brought her to the waiting room and seated her down on a bed and sat next to her.
'Are you feeling alright?' I asked her. She said she thought she had a little fever but everything else is alright. Nergui came to us and said the fever would let up naturally in a few days. He suggested a few days rest in one of the rooms there until she was feeling okay and for the final check. He said it would be better and safer to stay there for a few days. And he also told me that it would be better for me to stay here and think more about what he said.
I was caught up in a dilemma there. After seeing Diane, I became scared that I might lose Diane again. What if what Nergui said was true? What if they made up their mind to stand against us? There was no chance for us to win. I wanted to believe that there's not a chance that something like that would happen, but what if there was?
I wished he hadn't told me any of that from the beginning. It would've been better if he hadn't told me anything. I kinda realized why he chose to tell me. I was pretending to be just and fair, but looking at Diane's face, I knew that I had done and I would do anything in order to save her.
I laid her down on bed and asked Nergui to talk just between two of us again.
'What if we don't tell them about anything? What would happen?' I asked.
He said, 'Some of them will turn and the handling will be much easier.'
'But some of the innocent people will die, won't day?' I asked. Then he slowly dropped his head and held it up again, and said in a confident voice.
'If you give them enough time to get prepared, and if they choose to stand against you, it will be not only some of the innocent people that are going to be the victim.'
It was overwhelming for me. For all my life, I'd never made a cho
ice out of calculation.
I need some time to collect my thoughts. What he was saying was that if I informed the day walkers, there could be a major conflict between us and them. And if I chose not to inform them, there would be some inevitable sacrifices but the situation would be handled much easier.
'Why did you tell me? It would've been better if you didn't tell me anything and do as you want,' I asked him.
He answered with a calm voice.
'It didn't have to be you. I supposed that someone has to be aware of the possibility and I just picked you from the eight of you since you seemed the most desperate. No, that's not the most proper selection of a word. I chose you since you seemed to have the strongest will to save the girl. I suspected that your desire to save the girl was as strong as my desire to find my redemption.'
He was right. Justice, equality, human rights, and all the other kinds of fancy moralities became meaningless before the smile from Diane's face. At the bottom of my heart, I'd always said to myself that I could do anything to save her and get her back.
I'd been through a lot. I'd killed many people. I'd lost many of my beloved friends and families on the way and that was not for justice. I didn't do it for justice. I didn't do it because I wished to change the building. Freedom, justice, democracy or whatsoever. I didn't give a thing about those things. I just wanted to get her back.
'What do you think would be the best choice?' I asked him. I thought it was not within my capability to come up with anything.
'That depends on what you want,' he said.
'Please, help me. You know what I want. At least please narrow it down so that I can see clearly,' I asked.
'Narrow it down.. I guess I can help you with that. Oversimplification is one of the logical fallacies that scientists like me should avoid, but since the case is unique this time...'
'Just get to the point. I'm begging you.' I exclaimed.
'The easier way is the one you don't tell them anything about the possibility. You wait until someone shows the symptom and then take care of the situation. Since you are not the one who'd choose to kill them all, well, you may put them into a quarantine. I don't know how long it would take, but in time, the bacteria will successfully be stabilized inside your body and no longer be contagious to the visitors from outside,' he said.
'Okay, then, what if I choose to tell them?'
'You'll walk a harder path of convincing them to get imprisoned by their own feet. Separate the building into two and maybe isolate them. But do you believe they'd passively comply?' He said.
I made up my mind.
I answered, 'I'll choose to believe them. I can't deceive anyone. I can't trade lives. We should tell them and give them time to be prepared. I believe we should at least give it a try if it's the right way.'
'Even if it would lead to a massive conflict?' he asked me one more time.
'Even if it'd lead to a massive conflict,' I answered, 'I believe there's a way to peacefully settle down.'
'If you say so. Go back to your friend. I'll take care of the rest. I'll tell the others. Don't worry, I won't say that that's the decision you have come to. Just relax and care only about your friend.' said he and he headed where the others were.
I went back to Diane. She asked me what he said to me. I tried to mumble it out by saying 'nothing important,' but I failed. She asked me, 'Why, what is it? Don't try to equivocate and tell me. What did he say?'
I couldn't help but telling her everything. I remembered that I couldn't conceal anything to her since childhood. She always saw me through.
'He told me that the serum will not only cure the sensitivity to the sunlight, but it'll also make you stronger and live longer. Our wounds will heal faster and we will be superior to ordinary people in many ways.' I answered.
'That's a good thing, isn't it?' she said, 'But you're not telling me everything. do you? Tell me the rest of it. What are you hiding?' she said.
'There are people from outside the building. They were sent here as an exile from the city, and they helped us a lot in bringing the cartel down,' I said.
'Did you bring them down?' she asked.
'Yes we did. Now the building is now run by the counsel. Temporary counsel, actually. We'll have a huge election for the first cabinet maybe next month. A lot have changed since you came down here.' I said.
'Endy, so what's the problem? Stop talking around and tell me,' she said.
'... Ok. He told me that the bacteria will not do good on them. The serum, the bacteria might turn the people from outside the building into monsters just like the creatures down here. Not all of them, but possibly some of them. So he asked me to choose between informing them about the possibility and not telling them until some of them show the symptom,' I said.
She seemed to be surprised. But she soon put herself back together and asked me what my choice was. I told her the truth. I told her that I chose to inform them even though it would cause a conflict. I told her that I thought it was the right thing to do after all the help they had given us.
After listening, she just held me in her arms and said, 'You did a good thing. I probably got upset if you chose the otherwise. You remember what your mother always told us. Don't forget all the help you get from others. You have to repay and live your life with others.'
That was what my mom always told me. She believed in people. She believed that all men and women are good on the inside no matter what side they were in. I used to believe in people, too. Well, at least I tried to. But the road I'd taken kinda kept me from believing.
32
I stayed with Diane for a day. We had so much too catch up. She told me about her life as a sister she had after she was taken. She told me that she was lucky to be sent here. She said that the newly chosen sisters got two years of training and preparing before they join the march and other ceremonies and services.
I knew what that ceremonies and services actually meant but I chose to say nothing about them. She said she was treated well. Obviously she was for the two years because the cartel wanted them to be healthy and fine for their purpose. Anyways, it was good to hear that she'd been alright. She was taken straight to this basement after her so-called graduation and she had been here all the while I was throwing myself to the mud and weltering all over it. I'm not being sarcastic, though. I just felt so relieved to hear that she'd been alright.
'So, you've been here all those years?' I asked her. She said, 'Yes, I've been here all those years. Most of the days I've been asleep in that chamber. At first, I was terrified to see Nergui. I mean, he's just like those monsters in a bed time story. But soon we realized that he's actually a good guy. He took great care of us.'
'Do you know a sister named Rachel? She must be fifty something years old.' I asked her. She said, 'Yes, she was the one who used to help Nergui in his research.'
'Used to? What happened to her? Where is she now?' I asked. After a moment of hesitation, she answered.
'She, she died. It was an accident. I don't actually know what really happened.'
I could see in her face that she was lying or at least not telling the whole truth. 'Diane, it's important. I was asked to find her and she is the one who brought me all the way here to find you,' I said.
She looked like she didn't know what to say. She said, 'I don't really know what happened. All I know is that she... she turned into one of them. Ask Nergui. I'm sorry Endy, but I don't know what happened.'
She looked insecure so I decided to ask her no further. I let her take a rest in her room and went out to see Nergui and the others.
They were in the room with the screen and control panels where he showed us the videos. When I got in, everyone looked serious. I could tell that he just told the story that he told me a day before. I couldn't ask him about Rachel at that moment in that atmosphere. Purple asked me to see him. He took me out from the room.
'Did you know all this?' he asked me. 'Knew what?' I asked. 'That the serum will act against the
day walkers!' he shouted. I said 'I just heard it yesterday from Nergui.'
'Why did he told you first about that and not me or the others?' he asked. I said 'I don't know. He just told me.' Purple seemed a little bit annoyed. He continued.
'Why didn't you tell me about it then?' I said 'I thought he'd tell you, too. I mean, he's the one who knows the most about the serum and it's not that I tried to hide anything from you. I just thought that he was the one to explain, not me in the middle.'
Purple took a deep breath and said, 'Ha, you're right. I'm sorry I yelled at you. I did't mean to... Come on, let's get in and decide what we should do from now on.'
We got into the station again and everyone in there looked at us. Nergui turned on the big screen and put Bertie and Jacques on it. Kimmy was there, too.
We explained them everything. Kimmy looked glad to hear that the serum would cure the conditions at first but their face soon turned grey when they heard that the serum would turn the day walkers into the night crawlers. I said the only way to prevent it was for the day walkers to be separated from the others. Bertie seemed to be understanding. He said 'I guess so, but how long? Can't you make a vaccination or something like that?'
Nergui looked at me. I nodded at him to show that I needed him to say everything without hiding.
'Unfortunately, there's no such thing as a vaccine. I could try to find a possible prevention but first, you need to be isolated first since the bacteria could be infectious,' he said.
Jacques asked, 'How long should we be isolated then? How long will take for it to be safe?' Then Nergui said, 'After a few generations, I suppose. After a few generations, the bacteria would be gone and the children of the current generation will be born with pure and stabilized DNA.
I didn't know what to say so I said nothing. The rest of us were the same. We were saying nothing and waited for Bertie or Jacques to open their mouths.