by R. G. Angel
“What do you want me to say? You are judging me for my honesty. Why are you doubting me?”
“Because it’s wrong, dangerous, and suicidal,” Victor replied with a shake of his head. “Even your father won’t be able to save your career now. Once the full council notices your major break of protocol, your disregard for our rules… you would be lucky to even get a job as a private security guard.”
Tamlin stood straighter, jerking his chin toward the generals. “I didn’t betray anybody or anything; I do not seek forgiveness.”
“All this training, all these years put to waste.”
“My career won’t be a reason for me to let go of her. This… path used to define me, but since I found her again, it changed. With you, I might be someone but without her, I’m nothing. She, and only she, can wish me away.” He turned around briskly, thinking it was over, but when he reached the doorknob, his father talked again.
His voice was sad and weary now; he let go of his pretense. “If you don’t do it for you… do it for her.”
Tamlin froze, his hand on the handle, but he refused to turn around to show how much the words shook him.
“Aidan told us he thought Fay had the potential to be an amazing queen, but if things continue this way, she probably won’t even get a chance to get on the throne.”
He turned his head slightly, looking at his father from the corner of his eyes.
His father sighed. “She’ll be seen as an outsider by many, a deserter by some. She has no idea of our customs, our rules. She doesn’t even know the old language and if the reports are correct, she has no real control of her abilities and she doesn't even have an idea of her full potential. Don’t add this shame to the list. Most of this is not her fault, but you and her— They’ll blame her for it.”
Tamlin left without another word despite his father’s words having shook him to the core.
He was ready to lose everything to be with me, but he felt as if he had no right to expect that from me. Making me lose my throne would also impact the full nation, and he would feel like a monster if he did let that happen.
His mind turned black; he was probably in deep sleep now.
“You are not a monster; you are my knight, my heart,” I whispered before joining him in sleep.
Chapter 17
Aidan surprisingly sided with me. He knew there was no way I could be a warrior with only one month of training, but he said it was enough time to make me efficient enough to at least defend myself and not get myself killed in the first five minutes which made Tamlin even more worried.
They also decided to move me back to our world which scared me. I tried to find any excuses not to go there. It was too early, and I was not ready yet, but Aidan managed to convince me when he told me that going there would probably help with my training as it would help develop my abilities. He also added that removing me from this world would avoid any further potential human casualties and that sold me. Nick’s death still weighed heavily on my heart, and I couldn’t bear the thought of someone else getting hurt.
I packed a simple bag; Tamlin and Aidan both informed me that the fashion style in our world was a little different from here.
When Tamlin took me in the forest to cross over, I had doubts; it was really becoming my life. It would be a whole new world… literally.
He whispered something under his breath and the space between the two trees in front of us started to shimmer with a gentle blue hue.
Panic started to take hold of me, so I gripped Tamlin's hand tighter, and I didn’t even care that my hand was probably sweaty in his.
“I— I don’t even know how our land is called; I don’t know anything. Tam, they will hate me,” I rambled as all the doubt rushed back with a vengeance.
Tamlin turned me toward him, breaking my eye contact with the eerie supernatural portal that freaked me out a lot more than I was ready to admit. “Our land is called Heulwen.”
“Sunshine,” I whispered. Aidan had started to teach me Welsh and I was learning quite fast. He told me that I already knew the language; it just needed to come back.
Tamlin smiled. “Yes, see, you’re learning. Fay, you know how much I wish to keep you safe. If I had my say, I’d keep you hidden for the rest of your life. But it is not up to me and even if I hate to admit it, you were made for this. You feel unprepared but everybody would be in your position. Nobody is ever ready to step up as king or queen, no matter how prepared you think you are.”
“You think I’ll be a good queen?” I asked and I hated how uncertain my voice sounded.
“No, I think you’ll be a great queen.” He brought my hand to his lips. “Come on, Princess Fay of Heulwen. Let’s go meet your people.”
I nodded and took a deep breath before walking closer to the shimmer. I would not see anything behind it, and when I walked through it, the sensation and pressure on my skin felt like immersing myself slowly in water without getting wet. It was very peculiar.
I didn’t really know what to expect, what that world would be like.
Tamlin and Aidan told me a little, but they kept saying it would be better for me to see it for myself, but the best way to describe it would be like the medieval films with functioning plumbing, lighting, and heating.
When I stepped on the other side, dusk was falling. What time was it here?
I took a sharp breath when I looked up at the huge movie-worthy castle standing in front of me. The air tasted so good, so pure. I took another breath.
“Fay? Are you okay?” Tamlin asked, resting his hand on the small of my back.
“The air is so pure.” I took another deep breath.
“Ah, yes.” He nodded. “No cars, no factories—no pollution.”
I looked at the castle again. “I feel like we’re stepping in Highclere Castle.”
“Highclere?”
“Downton Abbey?” I said.
He shook his head, the furrow of confusion settling between his brows.
“Ah, never mind.”
“Come, we can’t be seen yet,” he urged as we exited the tree line and approached the castle from the back.
It had been decided to keep me a secret for a little while, and therefore, I didn’t have the chance to see anything of our world yet, but Tamlin had promised that I would soon enough.
When we reached the back door, Tamlin’s father was waiting for us. I’d seen him so many times in Tamlin’s head, but it was so weird to see the real him standing in front of us.
Tamlin, who had his hand on the small of my back, contracted straight away.
He bowed to the waist for me in silence, then nodded toward Tamlin before turning around and walking down a corridor and up to a beautiful luxury room with a gigantic fireplace in which burned a nice low fire.
“Princess,” he started as I took in the lovely tapestries on the wall.
“Princess?” he called again.
I turned toward him. “Yes?” It was still quite difficult for me to accept being called that.
“While this is your home, I would, however, advise you not to go and explore the palace yet. Also, do not leave your quarters without either Tamlin or Aidan.”
I paled. “Am I in danger?”
Tamlin scowled at his father who seemed unfazed.
“You’ll be fine if you follow the rules, which I know is not so easy for you.”
“Father!” Tamlin barked.
“Welcome home,” his father continued as if Tamlin didn’t just interrupt him. He turned around and left with Aidan close behind.
“I can see he’s a fan,” I said as an attempt to joke.
Tamlin pulled me in his arms silently, burying his face in my hair.
I held him tighter. “We’re okay, right?”
He sighed. “I’m sorry you have to stay in here.”
I reluctantly left the warmth of his embrace. “It’s okay. Have you seen this room?” I gestured to the luxury surrounding me, the king-size bed that looked so inviting.
>
He nodded. “Yannick will bring you dinner soon.”
“I— Can’t you do that?” I asked tentatively. “Won’t you stay with me?” I blushed at the meaning of my words.
He looked heavenward before looking at me, pained. “I won’t have much time these days, my fairy.” He looked out the window. “Trust me, if I could spend every night with you, I would not hesitate.”
“I see…” I tried not to sound as disappointed as I felt, but I didn’t think I managed as well as I hoped as he cocked his head to the side with a tender smile.
“Don’t be sad, please.” He took a shaky breath. “I need to know you understand.”
I nodded. “I do, but I don’t have to like it.”
He let out a little laugh. “No, I don’t like being far from you either. It makes me anxious.”
He walked to me and rested his hands on my cheeks. “I’ll miss you, Fay,” he whispered before kissing my forehead.
“I’ll miss you too, my knight.”
Once Tamlin was gone, I explored my living space. The room was luxurious and comfortable but a little austere. All the pieces of furniture were made of very dark wood. The taintures on the walls were also made of dark colors and with the dark sky, it was not helping. I was sure it would look more inviting in the morning.
I walked to the window and despite the darkness, I could see some lights on the horizon.
My people… I thought, a little bittersweet. I missed my family—my parents, Nick, and—
“Nick.” I sighed, accepting the sting of pain at the thought that I’d never see him again.
I shook my head. “Not now, Fay, not now.”
I opened the door to the right of my bed to find a huge bathroom with a bathtub so big I was sure it could fit two people.
I exited the bathroom and checked the door on the other side to find a well-stocked closet. I was going through the clothes that I presume were now mine when a soft knock made me turn around.
“Come in,” I said, much too eager. I was pleased that my loneliness was interrupted for a while.
Yannick walked in rolling a small table containing food and a pitcher of water.
“Princess.” He bowed his head. “This is your dinner. You will also find a few books on the lower level of the cart.” He pointed at the leatherbound massive books that had to weigh at least ten pounds each. “General Woods thought it might be a good idea for you to familiarize yourself with your culture and your history while you’re in forced lockdown.”
I see. I walked to the cart and lifted the cover to reveal an amazing meal of roast meat and potatoes. “Would you stay and keep me company for a while?”
He looked at me with discomfort before shaking his head. “I’m sorry, Princess. I would love to but unfortunately I have to be back in the limitary quarter in twenty minutes. Should you need anything—” He pointed to a green tassel hanging beside my bed. “Just ring and one of the staff will come to you.”
“Okay.” Wow, I really did step into Downton Abbey.
“Have a good night, Princess.” He bowed his head again and exited the room just as rapidly as he came.
I ate the amazing food and for a minute I forgot everything that was weird in my life. I was tasting so many new flavors at once. How could anything taste so good? If that was a glimpse of the life here, I was sure I was going to like it.
It’s not like you really have a choice, though, is it? After knowing what I knew that the fate of both humans and fairies alike rested on my head, how much choice did I have?
I settled in bed with the first massive books which I was sure could be used as a weapon and let my fingers trail over the title History if Heulwen, Vol 1.
I was not sure how much I read before falling asleep, but I’d been reading about the third fae war. The next thing I knew, I was woken up by the bright sun entering my window.
I blinked and groaned. That would teach me not to close the curtains.
I blinked again, pushing the massive book from my lap and hissing as my feet touched the cold stone floor. I really needed slippers.
I padded barefoot to the closet and looked at the clothes set for me. They were mostly dresses and while I considered throwing on a pair of jeans that were in my bag, somehow I knew it would antagonize Tamlin’s father who was clearly not a fan of my life choices and I needed to start blending in.
I settled for a long-sleeve pale-blue cotton midi dress with a flowing skirt and a top that buttoned up to a collared neckline and a pair of black flat ballet shoes that were my exact size.
Did Tamlin help prepare for my arrival? Most likely.
Every little thing was subtly different. The water was gentler on my skin, purer; the soap smelled like nothing I’d smelled before, and it made my skin softer than any product I’d used before. Even the shampoo bar had made my hair silkier and shinier—better than any expensive treatment Hollywood celebrities got.
I couldn’t help but wonder if there was some magic in their products. That was a question for Tamlin.
Once I was done, I rang and was only half surprised to see the maid enter the room with Yannick. I suspected the poor guy had been assigned as a babysitter.
“Princess, my name is Nolwenn.” The maid bowed before me. “What an honor to have you back on the fairy land.”
“Nice to meet you, Nolwenn; please call me Fay.”
“She most certainly will not,” Yannick said, throwing her a warning.
The maid blushed before forcing a smile toward me. I felt bad for her as it was my fault she got chastised.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have suggested it,” I offered.
Yannick pursed his lips. Ah, I guessed I made another faux pas.
I sighed. “Could I get something to eat please?” I asked, deciding to cut the losses.
She bowed again, before taking the cart from last night and leaving the room closely followed by Yannick.
I sighed and went to the window, braiding my hair while waiting for the food to be brought to me.
The outside was stunning. So many trees and a large village was visible in the distance. I hoped I would be allowed out soon.
Nolwenn came back with the breakfast quite fast, still followed by Yannick, and I didn’t bother starting a discussion this time.
I had just finished my food quite slowly as I kept on reading about our history and it was not like I had much else to do.
A short knock interrupted my reading. “Come in.” I expected Nolwenn to be back to pick up the tray, but I shot up when Tamlin’s father entered the room closely followed by Aidan.
“Princess,” they both said almost in unison before bowing to me.
I waited for a couple of seconds, but my heart sank when I realized it was only the two of them. Tamlin was nowhere in sight.
The general took in my outfit and relaxed a little as Aidan nodded from behind him. They approved of my choice and that was a good start.
Tamlin’s father's eyes wandered to the table and my opened book.
“Ah, I see you’re learning about your heritage. I’m glad.” He smiled a little.
Yes, second brownie point for me.
Aidan nodded again. Was I winning General Woods over?
“Yes, it’s quite fascinating.”
He nodded. “It is indeed. And what are you thinking so far?”
“That for people promoting peace and understanding, you’ve been in an awful number of wars.”
The general tensed and Aidan rolled his eyes. Yep, I just lost all the brownie points I’d just earned.
“As paradoxical as it may be to you, Princess, the path to peace is full of wars. You often have to pick up the weapons and fight to preserve it.”
“I see…”
“I don't think you do, but you will.”
Why did it have to sound like a threat? I knew I was completely unsuitable and unprepared for the role thrown at me. I didn't need the extra threat.
“Anyway, we’ve discussed the sit
uation of your safety and introduction into our world.”
I pursed my lips under Aidan's warning look. How dared they discuss me without me?
“It was decided that Aidan will train you to fight and that we will get a tutor to help you learn at least the basics of social decorum based on queen-to-be status.
Ah, Yannick had ratted me out. Asshat.
“You will need this if you want to gain the support of the council in the future,” Aidan added quickly. I knew what he didn’t say. Suck it up, Fay, you need that.
“Of course, thank you for your assistance. But why can’t Colonel Woods train me?”
Tamlin’s father gave me a ‘you know what look.’ “Actually, this option was offered to him but he declined.”
My heart sank in my chest and I was sure the pain was visible as Aidan’s face softened but it didn’t seem to move General Woods at all.
Was it true? Of course, it was. I pegged General Woods for a lot of things, but I’d seen in Tamlin’s head that he was all about duty, integrity, and truth. I highly doubted he wanted to play any games.
Meaning that Tamlin really wanted to avoid me.
I took a deep breath, trying to soothe the pinch… okay, the hole of deception, and stood a little straighter.
“When are we starting?”
“The tutor will be here in an hour for introduction. As for training…” He gestured toward Aidan. “I’ll leave you two to decide it.”
“Princess.” General Woods bowed.
“General,” I replied with the same detachment.
Once the general was gone, Aidan turned toward me. “When would you like to start?”
I shrugged, letting my composure slip a little. This man had seen me in every phase of despair. “The sooner the better; I just want to be done with all this.”
“Fay…” He trailed off in a huff as if I were a petulant child.
I also wanted to point out that by calling me Fay, he was breaking the protocol, but that would have been petty and not something he deserved.
I raised my hand dismissively. “It doesn't matter. Will this afternoon work?”
He nodded. “Of course, I will see you then.”
“Yes, see you then.”