“You see babies everywhere,” she’d said.
“That’s to balance you,” Esther said. “Children don’t exist in your world.” Still, Rosa had helped her staple the posters to telephone poles and tape them to storefront windows.
The loudspeakers squealed, then the static started to divide into words.
Rosa squinted at the stage. “That’s Tim Wright.”
“Isn’t he in jail?” Esther asked. Tim had been busted three days before when his guerrilla theater group interrupted the city council meeting.
“That’s him,” Rosa said. “No one can power up a crowd like Tim.”
“I thought the National Office didn’t want him to speak as often, so other people get a chance to be leaders.”
“Let me up there. I’ll talk about the war.”
Esther grinned. “You’d be great, Rosie.”
Tim Wright held the microphone close, angled down to his lips like a rock singer. “1968 has been a tough year. Last month alone, there were 813 combat deaths among US troops and over 6,000 soldiers hospitalized, the worst casualties since Khe Sanh.”
Esther snuck a look at Rosa, who stared straight ahead. Khe Sanh was where Danny died. Esther squeezed her eyes closed to stop the prickling.
“But those numbers—awful as they are—don’t tell the whole story. They don’t include the more than 11,000 Vietnamese soldiers killed last month. And they don’t begin to reflect what the loss of each of those lives means to their families.” Tim held out his arm and a black woman joined him at the standing microphone. “This is Mrs. Marilyn Amos. Her son died on Hill 364.”
“My family is against my being here.” The woman spoke slowly into the microphone, staring out across the mostly white crowd. “But I’m marching with you folks today so other mothers’ boys don’t have to die.”
Esther wiped her eyes. Jake said she took the war too personally, that she had to live her life and keep politics in perspective. He tried to make her laugh at herself, like the night before, when he’d suggested that they make the next edition of their anti-war newsletter a swimsuit issue and call it “Girls of the New Left.” Esther knew he was just kidding, but it wasn’t funny when he joked about women’s liberation, so she made fun of his bald spot and then they started wrestling and that led to fooling around until Molly woke up and wanted to nurse.
Back at the microphone, Tim Wright’s voice grew more urgent. “This year almost 300,000 young men have been drafted, more than ever before in US history.”
“Hell, no. We won’t go!” Rosa’s yell joined thousands of others.
No one is drafting you, Esther thought, then stopped herself. Rosa did draft counseling and helped guys cross into Canada. Maybe she acted inflexible and harsh, but that was because she cared so much.
A woman with a red and white armband hurried by, leading a young man toward the first aid tent. She must be Beth, the other medic. The guy’s shirt was bloody, as was the cloth he held against his head. He stumbled and almost fell. Beth steadied him with her arm around his shoulders and spoke into his ear. Esther tugged on Rosa’s arm. “Come on. Maggie might need help.”
Rosa grabbed her sandals and the sisters followed the injured man to the tent. He was young, just a kid really. He staggered inside and crumpled onto a stretcher as Rosa and Esther watched from the doorway. Maggie peeled the bloody cloth from the boy’s head. It was someone’s T-shirt, the peace symbol soaked deep red. The bleeding bubbled up under the blond surfer-boy curls at his hairline. Rivulets hugged the contours of his face, spreading across his forehead, flowing along his nose, streaming into his mouth. He spat blood.
“What happened?” Maggie tore open a package with her teeth and pressed the gauze pads against the boy’s forehead, then handed him a tissue.
He wiped blood from his lips. “A bunch of us broke off the main march. We walked along Grand River. We were in the street, singing, holding signs. These mounted police showed up in front of us. They yelled at us to get back on the sidewalk.”
“How many cops?” Rosa asked.
“A dozen? Maybe more. We told them we had a right to march in the street. Fucking cops just charged us. No reason.”
Rosa moved next to his stretcher, kneeled down close. “What happened then?”
“One cop came right close to me. He held his billy club over my head and said it was my last chance to get my ass on the sidewalk. When I didn’t move, he swung his club down on my head. Hard. I fell. I couldn’t see, but I heard horses’ hooves stamping all around me. People pulled me away from the horses. Someone gave me his shirt.” He pointed to Beth. “She came and helped.”
Rosa frowned. “Anything else?”
“They used tear gas. Lots of it. One canister exploded right in front of us.” He looked at Maggie. “I’m bleeding like stink, aren’t I?”
“Scalp wounds always look worse than they are. Did you lose consciousness when he hit you?” Maggie asked. “Pass out?”
He shook his head, sending a new gush over Maggie’s hand. She taped the bandage to his forehead. “You need stitches. We’ll clean you up, then send you to the ER.” Maggie pointed to a liter bottle of sterile saline. ”Open that for me?”
Esther poured the saline on clean pads, grateful to have something to do so she didn’t have to look at the boy’s face. Maggie wiped the blood from his eyes.
“What about the other people back there?” the boy asked. He touched his fingers to his scalp, examined his blood.
Maggie gathered up a supply bag from the table. “I’ll go.”
Beth nodded. “Good idea. There’s another medic there, but she may need help.”
Rosa touched the boy’s shoulder. “We’ll get those bastards for you.”
“Get real, Rosa,” Maggie said.
“I’m going with you,” Rosa said. She stood up, swaying visibly. She planted one hand on the kid’s stretcher; the other clutched the thick central tent pole.
Esther grabbed her sister’s shoulder. “You okay?”
Rosa steadied herself on the table edge. “Must be the heat.”
“Or the blood,” Maggie said. “Stay here. I don’t need you fainting in the street.”
“No way.” Rosa took their backpack and followed Maggie into the square. Esther trailed after Rosa, past the marchers listening to the speeches in the sun, tagging along as usual, even when she didn’t really want to go. But she couldn’t let Rosa go into danger alone.
Two blocks down Grand River, they heard the shouting. People leaned out of second and third floor apartment windows watching the street below. Rosa and Maggie ran toward the action, with Esther close behind. They passed an empty police cruiser parked half on the curb, tilted at an awkward angle. The sun flashed off the metallic paint and Esther saw her face reflected there, warped by the curve of the trunk. The cruiser’s strobe lights flickered in time to the jumpy beat in her chest.
The air grew harsh with the acrid weed-killer smell and Esther’s eyes started to sting and burn. After seven or eight marchers ran past them back toward Woodward holding bandanas over their noses and mouths, Maggie pulled a mask from her medic bag.
“Shit. My throat hurts.” Rosa unzipped the pack and grabbed the plastic bag with vinegar-and-water-soaked bandanas. She handed one to Esther and held one over her nose and mouth. Tossing the pack to Esther, Rosa started running down the street to catch Maggie. “Hurry,” she called behind her.
Esther slung the pack over her shoulder and followed more slowly. The tear gas haze was thicker ahead. Clouds of it, or was that just her eyes, blinking and weeping and stinging? A small crowd, maybe three dozen people, mostly young, swarmed the middle of the street. Facing them, standing between the protesters and the rally in Kennedy Square, six mounted police held their batons high in the air. One officer yelled through a bullhorn, “Get back on the sidewalks. You have no street permit for this location.” A few onlookers watched from under the green-and-white striped awning of a restaurant across the street.
Esther stood on tiptoe, trying to see past the horses’ broad rumps and braided tails. One cop swung his baton wildly, threatening the flag-wearing woman. This was going to be ugly and Esther didn’t want to be there.
She caught up to Rosa. “Let’s go back to the square. It’s too dangerous.”
“You go if you want. I’m staying.” Rosa ran to the left, around the line of horses, toward the demonstrators.
Esther lost sight of her sister and stood frozen on the sidewalk, torn between going back and going forward. Sticking close to Rosa and Maggie sounded like a good idea. But how could anything be safe, with angry demonstrators and angrier cops ready to fight? She wanted to be home. If she were hurt, what would happen to Molly? Could tear gas poison breast milk?
A scream, someone in pain. Was it the flag-wearing woman? Was it Rosa? Esther ran in the direction her sister had gone.
Maggie kneeled on a small square of lawn in front of a three-story apartment building. A woman sprawled on the sere grass, motionless. Her head rested on a boy’s lap, ponytail skewed to the side, the stain of her blood on the boy’s khaki shorts. The boy sobbed, rubbing at his eyes with both fists. Rosa stood between Maggie and the street, staring at the scene. Esther squatted next to the boy and handed him her bandana. She showed him how to hold it over his face, then took another one from the backpack.
The boy’s words were muffled behind the cloth. “This lady lives on my block. The cop hit her, on purpose.” He looked down at his lap where his neighbor’s bloodstain grew large on his shorts.
The sounds of yelling and chanting grew louder. A pop, then another, and the gas cloud grew thicker, denser. The crowd started to shift along the far side of the street, spreading out around the phalanx of policemen.
Maggie fiddled with the dial of her walkie-talkie but got only static. She tore off her mask, tried again, then shook her head. Coughing, she turned to Rosa and Esther. “They’re probably blocking our channel. Can you go back for help? This woman needs an ambulance.”
Esther looked around. “Where’s the other medic?”
“She is the medic.” Maggie pointed to the woman’s armband. “Cops like to target us.” She replaced her mask, adjusted the stethoscope earpieces, and began inflating the blood pressure cuff.
From the street came the dull cracks of wooden sticks on heads and the answering shouts and screams. Esther stood up. The mounted cops were turning, herding the demonstrators in the direction of Kennedy Square.
The boy cried louder. “Make them stop.”
“I’ll go back for help,” Esther said. She tightened the bandana over her nose and mouth.
Rosa stepped off the curb into the street. “Fucking pigs,” she shouted at the cops. “Leave the people alone.”
Esther grabbed Rosa’s arm, pulled her back onto the sidewalk. “Don’t get them pissed at you. Come back with me.”
“We have to stop them before they kill someone.” Rosa reached into the backpack for the brown paper bag. She grabbed the four green apples. She put one in Esther’s hand, pressing her fingers around it.
Esther stared at her sister.
“Help me do this,” Rosa said.
Esther looked into the street, then down at her feet, at the sidewalk. Clumps of grass grew in the thin lines of dirt through the jagged cracks. How had she—the quiet sister, the artist, the mother—ended up at the edge of a street fight facing the rear ends of six police horses, rock-hard apple in hand?
In the street in front of her, one of the cops shouted a couple of words, quick and sharp. A command, it sounded like, and then all six policemen attacked. They leaned out over the protesters, truncheons swinging.
“Now,” Rosa said. She threw her apple hard at the officers.
Rosa’s face was so fierce that Esther had to look away. She studied the apple in her hand. Her fingertips searched the apple skin, seeking a soft spot, probing for a worm hole. Maybe it wasn’t that hard. Not like a rock, not really.
Rosa threw a second apple and reached for the third.
An officer stood tall in his stirrups and leaned way out over the crowd. He raised his baton above the flag-wearing woman. It smashed down on her head with a dreadful crack, and she sank to the street.
Rosa grasped Esther’s chin in her hand, brought Esther’s gaze to her own face. “Throw with me, Esther. Now!” Rosa said. She pulled her arm back, ready.
Esther hesitated. It was the right thing to do, wasn’t it, to stop the cops from hurting people? She squeezed her eyes shut and hurled the apple as hard as she could, at the same instant Rosa threw hers. She pictured their twin green spheres flying into the turmoil on the street, together, in the same graceful trajectory. Well, maybe not exactly the same: Rosa’s probably flew straight and true, while her own wobbled a little and fell short. But still together, like sisters, together, even if they didn’t agree about everything anymore.
A horse screamed, sounding astonishingly human. Esther opened her eyes. The horse sidestepped wildly. The officer on its back, already leaning over with baton high, seemed to teeter in the air, then lose his balance. He yelped and tumbled off the saddle, disappearing into stamping hooves and brown rumps.
Two cops dismounted. Another grabbed the bridle of the skittering horse. Had the horse been hit by an apple? Oh my god. Did they do this? Did she do this?
Esther hadn’t actually seen what happened, and now she couldn’t see what was going on behind the horses. Empty space grew between the two groups in the street, each circling around their injured members on the ground. The protestors dragged two people out of the street toward Maggie on the grass. Rosa and Esther moved away from the street too, back closer to Maggie. Sirens whined in the distance. Esther peered down Grand River as the sound grew louder, closer.
“I guess their walkie-talkies weren’t jammed. Want to bet those ambulances won’t help this woman?” Rosa said.
Maggie looked up from her patient. “You look awful, Rosa. Like you’re going to keel over. Go back now and get help. Please.”
Rosa tugged Esther’s arm, leading her toward the apartment building. When they reached the shrubbery along the brick facade, Rosa leaned over the thick branches of a rose bush and puked.
Esther rubbed Rosa’s back, fingering the row of bumps along her spine. Rosa was never sick.
“It’s just the gas,” Rosa said.
“Or the excitement,” Esther said. “That was crazy.”
Rosa’s face lit up, the sick look gone. “Crazy-wonderful. We stopped them, didn’t we?”
Did they? “We’d better get help for Maggie.”
“This way.” Rosa wiped her mouth on the back of her hand. She sidestepped along the side of the apartment building, between the shrubs and the brick wall.
Esther followed. The bushes scratched her arms and hands and face. The gas stung worse. Behind the building, a gravel parking lot connected to a narrow alley behind the next building. They ran through packed-dirt backyards ringed with weeds, around rusted jungle gyms with chain-link swings and sandy sliding boards, past plastic wading pools turned over to drain. At the next side street, they cut back to Woodward, then sprinted the two blocks to the square.
Esther’s lungs burned as if the air was on fire. The blaze filled her chest, overflowing into her throat and eyes and nose. She concentrated on breathing, on following Rosa, on Molly, who should be waking up from her nap, who usually woke up cranky and needing to nurse. On anything except the horse screaming and the officer going down.
Back at the white tent, they reported to Beth. The older medic had returned. He called for an ambulance, then pointed at Rosa. “You look green. Sit down and stay put.” He grabbed a supply bag and followed Be
th out of the tent.
Rosa collapsed onto a metal folding chair. The stretcher was empty, the surfer boy gone. Esther pulled another chair next to her, close, and positioned so they could see the stage. The Secretary-Treasurer of the UAW was speaking about union support for the anti-war movement, but Esther couldn’t concentrate. She stared at the lamppost just outside the tent opening, festooned with rally posters taped in overlapping layers. They were her posters, but she felt no swell of pride this time. She felt nothing at all.
The crowd chanted, “End the war.” Esther tried to join in but her lips were thick and prickly, almost numb, and couldn’t form the words. She bent forward, hugging her chest and letting her hair fall over her knees. Rosa’s arms enveloped her. She pictured Rosa’s red curls and her own brown ones nested together. Rosa smelled of vomit. Esther swallowed a sob.
“You okay?” Rosa asked.
“Scared to death. I was sure the cops saw us, that they would come galloping after us with pistols drawn, shooting. Weren’t you terrified?”
“I was so psyched. I’ve still got goosebumps.” Rosa held out her bare arm, the gingery hairs stiff with excitement.
Esther twisted one of Rosa’s curls around her index finger. As a little girl, that gesture always made her feel safely tethered to Rosa but it wasn’t working now. She let it go and hugged her knees.
Maggie and the medics returned. Their injured colleague was en route to the hospital, still unconscious. Maggie didn’t mention anything about green apples or horses or an injured officer.
Esther whispered in Rosa’s ear. “I don’t think Maggie saw what we did. Should we tell her and the others?”
“Dunno. Let’s listen to the speeches.”
“No.” Esther stood up. Rosa would never leave in the middle of the excitement, but at that moment Esther didn’t care. “I’m going home. I need to see Molly.”
“I’m coming too.”
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