“I wish he’d have a proper sleep,” Judy confided to Greg. He put his arms around her.
“I know honey, but imagine if it was one of us – would the other leave?” Judy hugged her husband.
“Of course not.” After that, the pair of them, to Philip’s eternal gratitude, took over from him every evening for a few hours.
The boys would have been enjoying the flight had it not been for worrying about Liz. “He said she was getting better,” Jamie said happily.
“What he said is not necessarily the full truth,” countered the more realistic Jack. Jamie went very quiet and Jack could have kicked himself, he adored Liz and he knew that Jamie really looked on her as an “almost mother”. Try though Jack might, he couldn’t cheer his brother and finally they both closed their eyes as night fell and the plane took them ever nearer to Liz and their father, and they would face whatever it was that they would face.
*
It was that voice again. “Elizabeth, come on my darling – the boys are coming to see you today. Jack and Jamie will be here in an hour or so. Wake up, my sweet, please, we all need you so much.”
It was so warm and cosy in the dark. She clutched the pashmina, her comforter she used to call it when she put it over her shoulders. The air-conditioning in these American hotels was too chill for her.
*
He saw her tremble. “Nurse,” he called urgently. “Something different!”
“It looks as if she is beginning to come back to us,” the nurse said comfortingly. “Just talk to her, keep holding her hand as you are.” He stroked her hand and talked again of the boys, of her gold dress and how beautiful she had looked, how stupid he had been to let her go, and how Jack and Jamie were coming soon.
*
She heard a scream and knew it was her. The helicopter was going down – the side of the Grand Canyon became closer and closer. The pain, the pain, the pain – her legs – her face, her head. Then nothing, nothing until this voice, the voice that was comfortingly familiar. Could she come back? It was dark here, she felt safe. The voice was persuasive, cajoling. Perhaps if she could just open her eyes. The lids felt heavy, but she wanted to now. She tried, she tried so hard. Philip felt her hand suddenly tighten on his. He could see the fast movement of her eyes under their fine lids. The nurse had fetched the doctor and he had his hand on her pulse. “Keep talking,” he said to Philip.
Philip heard but was really aware of nothing except fingers clutching his. “Elizabeth, my dear sweet lovely Elizabeth. Please come back. I need you Elizabeth.” His voice broke and he put his head down on her hand. It was a moment of utter despair. Then he heard, very faintly, a different sound. Head up, he looked at her. Her eyes were open. She was trying to say something. He put his head near her mouth to try and catch what she was trying to say.
*
She was finding it hard. She had left the dark place, now it was like being in a cloud – but the voice that kept calling her held her hand – she could feel the strength. She tried to see who it was, who called, and though the light was too bright and her eyes seemed not to be working properly, she saw a comforting, familiar shape. “Is that you Philip?” she finally managed the words.
He could hardly speak for the emotion that gripped him. He held her hand and bent his head to kiss it before looking up and into her eyes. “Yes Elizabeth, it’s Philip and I am here to stay.” With a smile, a contented smile, she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.
For a moment Philip was worried, the doctor sensing this, reassured him. “It’s alright sir, she is having a natural sleep now.” He encouraged Philip to leave for a rest but he was not to be persuaded. Elizabeth might wake while he was away and he did not want to risk her wakening to find him gone.
He looked at his watch. The boys were due to land about now. Judy had said she would meet them, in fact she had insisted, and although he felt bad about not being there, he knew on this occasion they would totally understand.
Judy recognised them immediately – the older boy was just like a younger version of Philip and, almost, if not as, tall as his father. The younger boy Judy surmised must take after his mother, for he was as fair as his brother was dark. They were strikingly good-looking and as Judy walked with them to the waiting car she noticed the heads of a number of young women turning to look at them.
Jack and Jamie were surprised to be met at all, they had planned to take a cab directly to the hospital, knowing if their father wasn’t at the airport that is where he would be. When Judy had stepped forward and introduced herself as an old school friend of Liz’s they were pleased and assumed she would take them straight to the hospital. Judy quickly explained they were staying with her as their father was seldom at the hotel. After their initial disappointment, they could see the sense of staying with Liz’s friends and after a quick wash and change of clothes, followed by a delicious hamburger cooked by Greg on the barbecue, they were all set to go.
Their body clocks told them it was around one a.m., but as it was six p.m. in Phoenix, it seemed good sense to adjust as quickly as possible. On the way, Jack pumped his host about Liz’s condition. Not being aware that she had woken up that afternoon, Greg explained that she was still in a coma.
Jamie was very quiet and Jack hugged him and said, “She’ll wake up Jamie, now we are here – I’m sure of it.” Jamie looked at his older brother in gratitude, he so hoped he was right, he certainly couldn’t bear the thought of losing Liz.
Greg took them up in the lift and left them outside Liz’s door. He glanced through the small glass panel to make sure Philip was there, told the boys he would collect them in two hours and returned home.
As the door opened, Philip stood up. He didn’t think he had ever been happier to see his sons and said in a very low tone. “She’s sleeping.”
“It’s alright, Dad,” Jack said in a normal voice. “Greg told us she is still in a coma.”
Liz was having a lovely dream. She was in the sea with the horses, but the waves kept crashing overhead and suddenly, for the first time, she felt frightened of their power. The horses, perhaps sensing her fear, seemed fearful too. Then Philip seemed to be there, he took her in his arms and seemed to wade easily to the shore, the horses following.
She opened her eyes to see not just Philip, but Jack and Jamie too. “Hello,” she said in a normal conversational tone. “What are you boys doing here? Shouldn’t you be at school?” The family trio laughed delightedly. “We heard you were in a coma,” Jamie said. Philip frowned and was about to shush his youngest son. “Was I?” came an interested voice from the bed. “Was I really in a coma? How long for?” she continued, feeling stronger with every word she spoke.
Philip sat down again on the bedside chair he had abruptly vacated. The boys went to the other side of the bed and both unhesitatingly kissed the patient. If Philip was surprised, which he was, he didn’t show it. He knew there was something between the three of them and in due course he would find out the whys and wherefores, but for now he was content to see Liz’s smiling and happy face and the relieved faces of his sons.
Jamie seemed particularly fascinated with all the tubes and drips and wanted to look at her legs under the cage. “Why not? I can’t see them, I can’t even feel them much,” Liz said. Jamie lifted the sheet and saw a pair of badly burned legs with what looked like some patches of new skin in some places. “What a mess,” he said in an interested voice, remembering the long, slim, perfect legs he had seen when she wore a bikini on the boat. He had been too young to appreciate them then, but now, seeing this, reminded him of how she had been.
“That’s quite enough,” Philip said. “You are being overly curious.”
“No Dad really, I’m really interested…”
“Do you remember anything Liz?” Jack asked in his uncompromising way. A shadow passed over Liz’s face. “Vivien,” she said suddenly. “Vivien wouldn
’t jump. The pilot kept shouting at us. I managed to open the door, but she wouldn’t jump. I waited and waited, then finally the ground got closer and closer. The helicopter burst into flames as I jumped and I remember my legs were – I was – on fire.”
“You were,” Philip said quietly.
“And Vivien?” she asked.
“Vivien never did jump,” his tone was sombre. “She didn’t survive, Elizabeth. You were the only survivor.” Liz started to cry. Fortuitously Greg arrived a bit early and Philip insisted the boys went with him. They both kissed the weeping Liz who didn’t even seem to notice their departure. It was a long while before she quietened. A nurse gave her an injection which seemed to calm her, and then once again she slept.
Philip had so much to think about. Liz’s courage for one. Jumping out into the unknown, her bravery and non-complaining at her discomfort. He could tell she was in pain both now and when she had been in a coma by her very expressive face. Now he was thinking about Jack and Jamie, their closeness to Liz and when and how had it come about. The last time he had seen Jack with Liz he had been unbelievably angry at Jack. In hindsight, the situation had been almost comical – him naked, Liz hardly covered in bed and Jack standing in the doorway of the cabin, staring incredulously at the scene in front of him. He decided he must tackle the boys, he was happy they seemed so fond of Liz but his curiosity was awakened.
Liz was dreaming again, Philip could tell. She smiled and made contented little sounds, he wished he could be with her, sharing her happy thoughts. Liz wasn’t completely asleep, she was in the twilight zone between consciousness and sleep. She had seen Philip again and could hardly believe her eyes when she first saw him sitting there beside her. The boys too – dear Jamie, dear Jack. Her thoughts as she lay there were that she must have been quite poorly for them all to be there.
Her mind tried to grasp what it all meant. She was riding Guinness, and Coco cantered alongside. At the far end of the beach, she turned towards the sea. Riding bareback meant she could take them into deep water. The horses swam side by side. She slipped into the sea and swam around them. Suddenly they had gone – she was alone – out of her depth.
The sea was cold, not the balmy warmth she was accustomed to. She tried to swim, but her legs hurt and she couldn’t get any nearer to the shore. She felt herself sinking, once, twice, and knew that one more time and she would be finished. Just as she was about to give up, she felt strong arms around her. She opened her eyes. Philip had come from nowhere. “I heard you call,” he said swimming to the shore, pulling her easily with him. The horses stood side by side. He lifted her tenderly on to Coco’s back, leapt easily on to Guinness’s and very slowly they walked back along the way she had come.
Philip was dozing. He found these “cat naps”, when she slept, really useful and amazingly reviving. He woke with a start. She was moaning, she sounded frightened. Despite the tubes and drips he instinctively put his arms around her as gently as he could and held her tenderly, telling her she was safe and the nightmares would go away.
After a few more trembles she quietened, relaxed in his arms and, quite suddenly, opened her eyes. His face was close to hers, it seemed so natural to plant a loving kiss on her sensuous mouth. Contented, she kissed him back, then drifted off again, content to know he was by her side.
chapter 40
Philip and the boys had breakfast together the following morning. Greg had insisted Philip come to their home. “The boys need to talk to you,” he said. “Jude and I will make ourselves scarce.” As good as their word, and as soon as the five of them had consumed American pancakes with crispy bacon and maple syrup, with endless coffee for Philip and hot chocolate for the boys, Judy and Greg left the house. “I gather you have something to say,” Philip said with a smile. It was so good to have their company, he hadn’t realised how lonely these weeks had been. “It’s not exactly that we have something to say,” Jack began. “More we have something for you to read.” Philip was intrigued.
“Actually,” he said. “I rather wanted to talk to you about Elizabeth.” He saw the boys exchange glances. Jamie got up and went to the room he and Jack were sharing. Jack’s pile was smaller than his – but then he, Jamie, had been involved for longer.
He picked up the two bundles of letters from the dressing table and returned to the open-plan kitchen cum family room where breakfast had been laid out. “We want you to read these Dad, these first,” Jamie said, pointing to his bundle. “Then these,” Jack added, pointing to the second bundle. “It will take a while so we are going for a swim in the community pool just down the road – you can come and find us if you want to.”
Philip was alone in the house. Extracting a letter from the bundle Jamie had handed him, he noticed a discreet number one on the top left-hand corner of the envelope.
Dear Jamie, the letter began. He turned the sheet over, it was signed with a bold L. Where had he seen an L like that before? It didn’t matter, he read letter after letter. The latest, more recent, letters were signed differently, your loving A M L. He went back to the first letter with the three initials to find a clue.
The clue was there, of course, in all the letters. I was intrigued, Liz had written, by your code. I did as you told me and took the first letter of each line to make the words. Of course, darling Jamie, Philip read, I am honoured to be your adopted mother – just between us though – alright?
“Adopted Mother Liz.” Philip grinned at his younger son’s games. He then started on Jack’s letters. The first was relatively formal, referring to a teatime in Windsor, and how wonderful it had been at last to heal the rift. He read a few more letters, then skipped to the last, intrigued. She wrote of her impending American tour which would take her away for three months. She promised lots of postcards and a special meal in London when she returned.
Once again he found a reference to himself. I hope your Father is keeping well and not missing the beautiful Jutta too much. Philip nearly choked. The wretched boys kept nothing sacred! Then he noticed Jack’s letters bore the same three initials, A M L.
He looked at his watch. He’d only read a selection of the letters, but he was moved that the woman he knew, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that he loved and wanted to spend the rest of his life with, also seemed to love and be loved by his sons. He collected up the letters, put them in their appropriate bundles, and returned them to the boys’ bedroom. Then, without a moment’s hesitation, he left the house and walked across to the community pool.
The boys were sitting on the side of the pool, their legs dangling in the water. They were deep in conversation and Philip felt inordinately proud of them. They had helped get rid of the awful Jutta, and more importantly, they had kept faith with Liz, which was more than he had. Not for the first time he vowed inwardly he would stay with her forever, and his heart gladdened when he realised what a happy family they would be.
Jamie adored the hospital. He asked so many questions and seemed to easily absorb and remember what he was told, and he consistently fed information back to Liz and his father that they would rather know less about!
He was fascinated by the plastic surgery Liz had already had on her legs, and finally, the head plastic surgeon allowed him to watch some operations from the viewing gallery. If George Lloyds expected that it might “put off” the sixteen-year-old he was mistaken, and he found himself drawn to this enthusiastic youngster. “What are you going to do when you graduate from high school?” he asked one morning. Jamie did a quick translation – what would he do when he had completed his baccalaureate and what would he study at uni? “I am going to study medicine.” He sounded so sure, so confident, that George Lloyds had no doubt this lad would achieve his dreams.
“Fine,” he said with a smile. “When you are fully qualified let me know. Too many of our brightest grads are going into cosmetic surgery. We need the ‘real stuff’ done too, like on your mother.” Jamie didn’t correct th
e assumption. “But she will need cosmetic surgery too, on her face,” Jamie said.
“That is not the cosmetic surgery that I object to young man, and when you are older and qualified you make sure you get in touch with me and we will talk further.”
“Right,” Jamie replied confidently. “I am sure now about what I want to do.”
A few days later he told Philip and Liz. Philip was cautious. “You have two more years in school yet, Jamie. You may well change your mind several times between now and then.” Jamie looked at Liz. “I won’t you know ‘AM’.”
“I know,” she answered quietly.
Liz was having physiotherapy. She was now in a wheelchair for several hours a day and feeling incredibly weak. She had despatched Philip to spend time with his sons and, once he realised she really wanted him to go, he drove his hired car to Greg and Judy’s and tracked the boys down once again at the community pool. Although Judy and Greg had a pool it was really only a splash pool to go in and out of in the heat of the Arizona day. The community pool gave the boys a chance to talk and also they had already met other teenagers there who were very friendly towards the English “intruders”.
When Philip arrived he noticed two silver-haired men in a somewhat heated conversation about golf and his sons equally deep in an earnest, though he was pleased to note a quiet, conversation. They didn’t see their father until he was almost on them. “Can anyone join in?” he asked in a pleasant voice, taking his sandals off as he spoke and sitting down in the space they had made for him between them. Fortunately, he had Bermuda shorts on so, like his sons, he was able to enjoy the coolness of the water on his feet and lower legs.
Philip found Phoenix very hot. He had become used to the heat in India, but now after several years in Paris, the heat hit him like a sledgehammer! “I’ve read the letters,” he said, by way of a preamble. Jack leaned forward and met Jamie’s eyes but neither boy spoke. Only minutes before Philip had arrived they had agreed to listen to what he had to say, for after all they had reasoned, they had deceived him and supposed he might be angry about the “adopted mother” thing that had become important to them both.
The Portuguese House Page 21