by Kait Rose
“Do you know who dropped this off?” Ezra, Rem, and Declan have been rotating shifts with dropping me off clean clothes and food, but they never just dropped it off at the desk and not come see Madison.
“I don’t know his name. but I’ve seen him waiting outside the hospital everyday. He kind of looks like the guy who plays Thor.” Knox has been here waiting? I figured after that night, he’s been hiding out at home. I’m honestly surprised he’s been waiting out front.
I debated going outside to talk to Knox, but I knew right now I was still fuming inside. I didn’t want things to get worst between us, so I decided to go take a shower and change into the clean clothes he brought me. The nurses have been kind enough to let me use the bathroom in Madison’s room since I refused to leave the first few days.
“Hey there beautiful. I’ll be right back.” I kissed Madison’s head and went to shower. I showered fast, ready to get back to Madison. I threw a towel on my waist and went to grab the bag of clothes I forgot on the chair next to her.
“That’s a sight I don’t mind waking up to.” The sweet sound of her raspy voice had me running across the room to her side.
“Little bird…you’re awake.” I barely could get the words out. I was overwhelmed with relief and shock that she really was awake.
“Water?” I grabbed the pitcher of water and poured her a drink.
“Are you alright baby?” I knew I had to hit the call button, but I’ll admit I’m selfish to steal a few minutes alone before the nurses come.
She took a few minutes to think about it and from the sound of the beeping increasing on the monitor, she remembered everything. She looked at me with wide eyes and I said, “Shh, it’s ok. I’m going to call the nurse in and then I’ll explain everything to you later.”
I went to push the call button, but Madison grabbed my wrist to stop me. “Did you see it?” I knew Madison was asking if I saw the video and I wish she hadn’t. I went back and forth in my head, debating if I should tell her the truth or lie. I knew though I had to be honest.
“Yes, I saw it at the party.” The monitor was racing while her eyes began to water.
“Chanel told me you stole it from Delilah and this was just another cruel plan to get back at me.” Her lip was quivering and the tears were streaming down her face. The sight of her was heart breaking. I really fucked up if she believes I could be this vicious.
“Baby, please believe me. I had no part of this and I would never do something so…”
“He’s right Madison.” Knox came walking in, cutting me off. All I know is if he wants to save any bit of our friendship, he better tell Madison the truth.
“Maddie, it’s my fault. I switched Jude’s note out for the one telling you to come to our house. Please believe me, I had no idea about that video. I never even knew that happened to you. Chanel was suppose to get you to go out to the pool house and think Jude was screwing her friend. I’m so sorry, I wish I could take it all back.” Madison’s monitor hasn’t calmed down, so I hit the call button while she was focused on what Knox was saying. This was just too much for her and she needed to calm down.
“I need time to process this. I hope one day I could forgive you.” Right there showed the good in Madison. I bet any other person would kick him out and never look back, but Madison was a loyal friend who never gives up on someone even when they deserve it.
“I understand and I hope one day you both could too.” Knox tried to give us a small smile and turned to leave, but Madison stopped him before he could walk out.
“Knox!”
He stopped but didn’t turn back. He was a quiet for a few seconds until he said, “Yeah Madison?”
“You’ll be okay, right?”
“I hope so.” Without waiting to see what Madison had to say next, Knox left without looking back.
I looked over to Madison who was visibly upset and said to her, “You…you are amazing Madison.”
She looked up at me with a confused look on her face and asked, “Why do you say that?”
“Knox had a part in why you are laying here right now after fighting for your life this past week, but you’re still concerned if he will be okay. You always put everyone first before yourself. You didn’t deserve this, but I swear to you I will never let anything happen to you again.” Madison gave me a small smile and reached out for my hand.
“Thank you, I would have died in that house if it wasn’t for you saving me.” The thought alone if I didn’t come when I did haunted me ever since.
“You’re welcome, but how do you remember that? You were unconscious when I finally was able to get inside.” Madison barely had a pulse when I arrived, so I really didn’t think she would remember anything.
“Remember when we were swimming and you told me I needed to fight for my life and not give up?” I remembered that day like it was yesterday. I nodded my head yes and she continued to say, “I tried so hard too, but when she shot me I couldn’t anymore. I was more scared of never seeing you than I was dying. I can’t explain it, but I knew you were there because I finally felt at peace.”
“Little bird…” I was all choked up and I didn’t know what to say. She must have felt the same because she reached out for me and I held her until the nurses came in.
Chapter Thirty Four
Madison
Days blurred altogether and I had no idea how long I’ve been here trying to recover. I was sore and exhausted from barely sleeping. The nightmares were worse than they ever been before. It was a constant replay of the night Mrs. Montgomery almost killed me. I just wanted to be in my own bed and hopefully tomorrow I will be.
Right when I tried to close my eyes for some sleep, someone was knocking on my door. “Madison, are you awake?” Dr. Fully asked from the doorway.
“Yeah Doc, come in.” Dr. Fully walked in and sat down in the chair next to my bed.
“Madison I know you’re tired, so I will make this quick. Someone may have mentioned to me about the nightmares you have been having and I wanted to see if you wanted to talk about it.” I nodded my head agreeing. Maybe if I talk about it, I’ll get some sleep.
“I just keep replaying that night over and over again. I thought the Mr. Montgomery nightmares were bad, but these take the cake. It starts off with everyone seeing the video, but the only difference is in my dream I have to watch Jude watch it. Then everything with Mrs. Montgomery starts, but instead of just her, it’s also Mr. Montgomery and Chanel helping her.” My skin started to get covered in goosebumps just thinking about it.
“What you went through was very traumatic. Between your parents, Mr. Montgomery, and that night, I’m amazed at your strength to keep pushing forward. There are a lot of people out there that would suffer a mental breakdown, but you are trying to get help and move on which is a great step in the right direction.”
“Will I ever forget?” I’d do anything if someone can just wipe my mind clean of all those terrible memories.
“Honestly, no Madison. You’ll never forget, but we will get you to a place where you can cope. I do think we can eventually get these nightmares under control.”
“Ok Doc, I’ll do anything to get better.”
“That’s great to hear Madison. When you get home and settled, I want to start doing video sessions twice a week.”
“Sounds good.”
“Ok, now get some rest and I will talk to you soon.” He patted my shoulder and turned to head out the door, but I stopped him before he left.
“Hey Doc! Thank you for never giving up on me.” I was always so stubborn during our sessions and most therapists passed me on, but never Doc.
“You’re a strong girl Madison and you don’t deserve to be given up on.” With that said, he gave me a smile and headed out the door. Those words he said, I will never forget.
“I want to see Madison first, you’ll be in there for a hour!” I could hear Ezra from the hallway and I assume he’s talking to Stella.
“To bad, so sad!” St
ella came running into the room with a pissed off Ezra staring from the door way.
“Hey Ezra.” I said from my bed.
“Hey! I came to visit, but someone decided to cut me off in the parking lot and now the line to come see you.”
“Don’t drive slow and you can go wait, ok bye.” Stella was never a bitch. This new side to her was only brought out when Ezra was around.
“I can have more than one visitor now, you can come in.”
Stella looked over at him and said, “Nope, go wait in the waiting room.” With a huge smile on Ezra’s face, he ignored Stella and came to sit next to us.
“How are you feeling?” Ezra asked. Stella wiped off the pissed look she had and replaced it with a look of concern.
“I could be better, but I’m just happy to be alive.” I always thought the universe was against me, but after almost dying, I feel like a new person with a better outlook on life.
“We’re happy your alive too. Trust me, I so thought you were a goner for sure.” Ezra said and the look of horror on Stella’s face was priceless that it made me and Ezra laugh.
Stella elbowed Ezra in the ribs and said, “You’re an ass! It’s not funny guys, you have no idea how bad it tore me inside thinking if I just stayed home, this would have never happened.” We both stopped laughing and the feeling of sadness overcame me. I didn’t know she blamed herself.
“Stella, do not blame yourself for a second. To be honest, when I was laying there, I thank god that you weren’t home. If you were home, she wouldn’t have a second thought to just putting a bullet in your head. She almost killed Jude.” Ezra tensed up at the idea and Stella shuddered. It was a cold truth, but I needed her to know that her being out of that house was the best thing. Losing Stella would be losing a piece of me and I don’t have that many pieces left to lose.
“I’m sorry. I just hate the idea of not being able to help you, but I do have some good news for you.”
“I could use some good news, spill.”
“Well Chanel has been officially kicked out of the sorority and is on academic probation. I over heard they want her to finish the rest of her final year classes online.” Thank god. She may have not pulled the trigger, but she was still guilty for showing the video. I was happy I wouldn’t have to see her again…I hope.
“That is good news.” Ezra chirped in.
“Yeah and you’ll never guess who I saw all cuddled up in the corner of the parking garage.”
“Who?” Ezra turned to Stella with his head on his hands, ready to hear whatever juicy gossip she was about to tell. Stella gave him a pointed look like she couldn’t believe he was interested in some gossip, but there he was more excited than me.
“Ok then.” Stella said slowly and then turned back to me to tell me the rest. “Declan and Abby.”
“Psssh, saw that coming from a mile away.” Ezra said, losing all the excitement in his voice.
“They’re not the only two.” I murmured referencing to Stella and Ezra.
The both turned back to me and at the same time said, “What is that suppose to mean?” All I could do is laugh, but thankfully Jude was at the door ready to save me from these two.
“Ok out you two. Madison looks like she is ready to sleep and doesn’t need to be giving you an explanation on when you two will hook up.” Ezra and Stella both had their mouths agape, but surprisingly both got up to leave without arguing with Jude.
“Bye Madison, call me later.” Stella kissed the top of my head and Ezra waved good bye. They both tried to get out of the room at the same time which resulted in Stella elbowing Ezra in the ribs and him telling her she is the devil. Jude and I couldn’t stop laughing which was much needed anymore.
“I give it two weeks after move in that those two hook up.” Jude said with a smile and I shook his hand giving it a month.
“Are those for me?” He was a holding a bouquet of sunflowers and I was amazed he remember they’re my favorite flower.
“Ah, no. I’m sorry babe, the nurses gave them to me.” Awkward. I just shrugged since I really didn’t know what to say. I bet it was Eliza, the young hot nurse, since she’s been giving him eyes every time he’s here. I swear that’s the only time I see her in here.
“Get out of your head, I was just kidding. Just to let you know I would never accept flowers from anyone, but you.” He flicked me on the nose and set my flowers by my bed side.
“You’re lucky you’re cute.” I couldn’t help the smile that creeped out. Now with the past in the past, I was looking forward to the future.
“How’s your day going?” He was finishing up classes before break. Since our house burned down, me and Stella were invited to stay at their house until the end of the school year.
“I finished my last exam today and then had a video session with Dr. Fully.” Thankfully after the school heard of me almost being murdered, I was excused from finals. I was happy to hear he took Dr. Fully’s offer to be his therapist. I guess the two bonded while I was in here.
“Wow Jude, that’s really good to hear.”
“Yeah I’m happy I met him.” I gave him a small smile and my eyes were growing heavier by the minute.
“Little bird, can I talk to you before you fall asleep.” I instantly opened my eyes and I couldn’t help the panic that was rising up.
“Ok what is it?” My heart was racing and I just prayed it was good news and not anymore bad news.
“The night everything happened, you know I had no part in it, right?” Ezra and Rem stopped by my room the other night to make sure I believed them when they said Jude had no part in the video. I felt awful that for a minute that night, I did doubt him.
“I know and I am sorry I believed Chanel that night. I’m such an idiot.” I shook my head in disgust.
“No Madison, you’re not. That’s my fault you believed her. I said and did a lot of awful things to you that you never deserved. For that I can’t blame you for doubting me, but please know I will never do anything to hurt you ever again.”
I reached over and squeezed his hand and said, “I know that now and I believe you.”
While holding his hand, he started to shake. He looked around the room and took a deep breath. While looking me in the eyes he finally said, “Little bird, that night my plans were changed, but never how I felt. I wanted to tell you that night and I still want to tell you that I love you so damn much. Will you be mine?” All the years I knew Jude and even now, I never heard him say those words to anyone. My heart was racing and of course the monitor gave me away.
“How can you love someone who’s so broken?” I wished more than anything I can tell him how much I love him too, but I needed to know this first.
I thought he would be angry at my question, but instead he climbed into my bed and turned to me saying, “Easy because it’s you. We’re all broken Madison, even the ones who don’t admit it. We all give and lose pieces of ourselves, but when I’m with you I’m whole again.”
“I love you Jude, more than anything.” He reached over and kissed me like he’s never kissed me before. Our story maybe messy and damn has it been complicated, but it was ours that ended up with the two of us in love.
Chapter Thirty Five
Madison
“How are you feeling today?”
“Honestly, I’m excited, but nervous.”
“That’s all normal. You have moved many times, so it ok if it brings up old feelings of nerves. What I think would help is if you write a…”
“Ugh come on Doc, you know how much I hate the list exercises.”
“Ugh come on Madison, you know how much I hate when you don’t let me finish my…”
“Sentence. See Doc, I know you.” Dr. Fully started laughing and I did too. He really has grown on me and I appreciate all his help.
“Ok fine. Call me if you need me anytime, ok?”
“Yes Doc, promise.”
“Ok very well. I will talk to you soon.” I was starting to look forward to o
ur video meetings now that I was willing to get the help I needed. I didn’t want to revert back to my old ways because all I wanted was to be happy. I just wished I was opened to this a long time ago instead of it taking me almost dying to accept help.
“Why do you have that long lost look on your face beautiful?” Jude came walking over to me and sat down next to me on his front porch.
“Nothing just got off the phone with Doc and now watching these two.” Stella and Ezra were at it again. This time they were arguing over who would take her luggage in. All of our things were ruined in the fire, but that barely made a dent in her clothing since she had two closets back home. Luckily, we were the same size and she gave me a good closest worth until I get back on my feet.
“Ezra! I swear on all things holy, you better put my suitcase down.” Stella was trying to rip her suitcase out of his hands, but it was pointless. Ezra was double her size and all he had to do was hold the bag up high out of her reach.
“Do you guys see this? She’s crazy!” Ezra shouted over to us and at the mention of him calling Stella crazy, she was standing on top of his truck’s hood.
“Stella! That’s a 1975 Chevy Truck, get off it before you dent it!”
“Are you calling me fat!” Those two can talk each other in the circles. I don’t know what happened between them over the past few months, but it will be interesting to live with them for the rest of the school year. Since the fire burned our house down and all close by apartments were already full for the rest of the school year, Mr. and Mrs. Ryan suggested we move in here with the guys. Knox wasn’t too excited to be sharing a house with his sister and me sharing a room with Jude really didn’t go over to well with him. I think the guilt of what he took part in made him agree though.
While Stella and Ezra where still arguing, Jude motioned for us to go inside. We ran into Knox and you can feel the tension between him and Jude. I’m trying to forgive and move on, but Jude still needs time. When we got inside, Knox was heading straight towards us.
“What’s with all the screaming?” By the way Knox was rubbing the back of his neck and looking anywhere but Jude, you can tell he was nervous to even try to talk to him. Jude nodded his head towards the front door and said, “Your sister and Ezra.”