Angus shook his head, hoping to shake off the dredges of sleep that still clung to him. He thought he hadn’t heard correctly. “Charlotte is leaving? Taeday?”
Mrs. MacLean sighed and chuckled at the same time. “Aye, there is nae stopping that lass. I tried tae argue, but she told me her father wished her return and that she must be on her way. She told me she was feeling much better.”
Angus was still in shock. “But, surely, she is nae well enough tae travel, nae in her condition.”
Mrs. MacLean held up her hands in defense. “I told ye, Sir, that she is nae tae be argued with. She did look much better after a night’s rest, and once we assessed the wound, we found ‘twas naething tae concern ourselves with greatly. But, I told her she must rest at the Fort as soon as she arrives.”
Angus was flabbergasted. She was leaving, and a week earlier than was required. Damn it. It was because of the letter. He couldn’t think of any other reason. “Is she still here?” He asked, his voice pained, and he hoped that Mrs. MacLean didn’t notice.
She nodded and kept her head down as she laid out the dishes. “Aye, but she will be leaving shortly. The servants are busy packing food for her, and the boy tae take this morning, and I believe she is with her servant in her chamber, packing her clothing.”
Before Mrs. MacLean could say another word, Angus rushed upstairs to find her. His mind was still heavy with not enough sleep, so he had no thought of what his behavior looked like to others. Behind him in the Hall, Mrs. MacLean chuckled to herself. “Good lad,” she said.
Angus knocked lightly on Charlotte’s door, and he was dismayed at the sound of her light, almost cheery voice. So she was excited to leave. He entered and shut the door behind him, and leaned back against it, crossing his arms.
Charlotte looked up and lifted an eyebrow, but she kept packing. There was no maid in sight. “So, ye have decided tae leave early then?”
Her voice had lost the light cheer of before and was replaced with forced calmness. “Yes, and what should it matter to you? I will no longer be a burden, and you can get on with your duties. I will not be troubling you anymore.”
He clenched his jaw. “And what about yer patients?”
Charlotte tensed at that question but paused only for a moment before continuing to move items to her trunk. “I have talked to Mrs. MacLean at length this morning. I have alerted her to the patients’ needs. And I will write to her from the Fort, and she will send me updates. I have a theory, but I need to study it further before I can make any plans. I hope you do not mind; I have taken a medical book from the library?” She turned towards him, her one hand on her hip, daring him to fight against her.
“Nae, but why are ye leaving early? Ye’ve barely recovered!”
She sighed. “’Tis best that I get out of your way and do it soon. Besides, I can’t deal with being badgered any more. I’m much more used to being badgered by family, as opposed to a complete stranger.”
Angus moved towards her. “This is nonsense, lass. Ye could just wait until the week is up.” He couldn’t even believe what he was saying. It was like he was pleading with her when that was the exact opposite of what he wished to do. But, his heart was twinging with the thought of her going now. He thought he had a whole week left to get used to the idea.
Let her go, his mind was screaming at him. All your problems will be solved once she is gone.
“Besides,” he continued, “I wouldnae say that we’re complete strangers.”
Charlotte coughed lightly, but her face did not betray her. “No, I suppose not. You know more about me than I know about you. Reading that letter gave you more information than I wished.”
She closed her trunk with a loud bang and then moved toward the door. “Seamus is waiting for me. I will send someone for the trunk. I suppose this is goodbye then.” She glanced at it, glanced at him, and then turned the doorknob.
Maybe it was the lack of sleep, the stress of all he had to do, that she was leaving more abruptly than he had planned in his mind, or the fact that she might soon be married. Angus moved to her quickly and grabbed her wrist. Charlotte turned back, her lips open in surprise. She met his eyes, and for a moment, there was no anger in them.
They seemed to be in this dance since Charlotte had come to the Isle, where she would step forward, and so would he, and then one would step back. Then they would twist around each other and do the same again. Here he was, stepping forward, making a move in the heat of the moment. She didn’t pull away, so he lifted her hand to his lips and laid a kiss across the soft skin of her hand. He didn’t take his eyes from her, and she still didn’t try to stop him. Then he couldn’t resist. He moved his lips to hers, and that feeling was there again between them, just like it had been last night.
But this time, it was soft and slow, and Angus could feel himself harden instantly at the touch of her smooth lips. Their hands had parted now, and Charlotte slowly moved her hands over his shoulders and interlocked them on the back of his neck. Angus moved his to her waist, and the door shut behind her, just as he was opening his mouth to taste her further.
But it seemed to jolt her to attention. She pushed his chest, hard, and with surprise, backed away. He feared his hard cock may have scared her away. But she didn’t look down. She merely watched him with fire in her eyes. “No!” she said. “You cannot do this and try to get me to forgive you or whatever it is you’re doing. You read my letter; you don’t ever trust my decisions, and you called me a burden. You cannot kiss all that away. I am not just some woman who will melt into a man’s arms and do whatever he wishes her to do!” she yelled and grasped at the doorknob to leave.
Once she departed, Angus felt like he’d been kicked in the gut. Was she equating him with the man on the shore? Did she think that he was like that man, someone who would take favors from a woman without her permission? He touched his mouth and closed his eyes with guilt.
Bloody Hell! That could not be. He could not be that man. But now she had left and would leave thinking that. He left the room and walked slowly to his study. His face was grim. But before he sat down, he watched her and Seamus at the boat, readying their way to move out into the smooth water. It was the calm after the storm, and the water was more serene than it had been in days.
He stood, his hands behind his back, and he chided himself for what he’d done on impulse.
What did ye hope tae achieve with the lass? Did ye think it would make her stay? Did ye even want that? Bleeding idiot. Now she thinks yer a bastard. But nae matter. She is gone now, and ye dinnae need tae think of her anymore.
He watched her turn back for a moment and look up at the castle before Seamus helped her into the boat. Servants had brought her trunk and placed it in the center. As Charlotte stared upwards, her expression looked like she was concentrating, perhaps trying to capture the image of the castle in her mind before she parted from it. She glanced toward him at the window, and he drew back slightly, but she didn’t make any face to show that she had seen him.
Strands of hair were whipping across her face in the wind, and it reminded him of the day that he had caught her as she was falling when trying to climb the nearby hill.
He had captured her thin waist in his hands, and when she’d turned around in surprise, she’d looked just like that: a wind-swept beauty. Charlotte stepped into the boat, and her back faced him, as Seamus began to row away, moving her slowly towards the mainland and out of Angus’ life.
He turned away, ignoring the clench in his heart at the thought. He sat down at the table, his papers before him, with all the work that desperately needed to get done. Sure, she was gone, and now his duty of protecting her had fallen to her father. That duty was done. She was no longer his responsibility. Therefore, he could breathe easily and forget about her. But as he sat there, thinking about the new kiss that they had just shared in her room, he knew that he would not forget her. He would be thinking about her every day and every night until he saw her again.
&nbs
p; Damn that lass.
Chapter Eleven
Charlotte was grateful for Seamus’ constant chatter. He talked about fishing, working as a messenger for the soldiers at the Fort, and about his ma, who was constantly trying to get him to wash his ears clean on Sundays before church. The constant hum of his voice drowned out the pain of her departure slightly. And it made him ignore her somewhat. He rowed, and she sat before him, her back facing the Isle of Mull, the land that had become her home for the past few months.
She could sit and think without having to have any sort of conversation with the boy. This gave her time to breathe and think about what she had just done. Tears were building in her chest, begging to be let out, but she tried to swallow them down. She had just left, abruptly, the place where she had been happiest in the world. She’d barely had enough time to say goodbye to anyone who had been kind to her. She didn’t have time to say anything to her patients. She had simply up and left, reeling from the anger and embarrassment she had experienced at Angus’ hand.
How could she have done that? How could she have been so rash and thoughtless? So many people had been a part of her time there, people who had come to mean something, and she just left them. She was following her father’s orders, and that’s what she’d told them, but in her heart, she felt like she was betraying them, leaving before she even needed to. A tear edged its way out and down her cheek, and she brushed it away, hurriedly with a piece of her cloak.
At least she would be in touch with Mrs. MacLean, and she could write to her with a proper goodbye and ask her to speak to the patients about why she needed to leave. That gave her some comfort. And she could hear about Angus, and if he fared well.
But why would she care about him? A pang of guilt flashed through her when she thought of Calum’s pleading request. Then, there was that kiss in her room just now. It had been so unexpected and so surprising, and she had felt like time had slowed when Angus had taken her by the wrist and kissed her hand so softly.
He had done exactly what she wanted him to do. They might not see each other again, or at least for a very long time, and she had wanted to feel him in her arms once more, to feel what a real kiss was like before she was resigned to the dull future that lay before her.
But, it opened something up in her, and it made her afraid. It was like the other night, but the kiss’ gentleness and purity frightened her more this time, showing Angus to be someone that she could actually care for, and she couldn’t have that. She was about to go and be badgered into thinking about marriage for her family’s benefit. She could not be weighed down with thoughts of someone else haunting her mind. And he was not someone to be trusted. He was one person one moment, and then a frustrating, commanding, stoic person the next. He had read her personal letter and violated her trust.
He had broken an unspoken bond between people. He had done something so reprehensible, and she could not forgive him. Besides, he had called her a ‘burden,’ even after they had shared their first kiss, and he had called her perfect, she was still a burden. That’s what men thought of women, wasn’t it? He was like the man on the beach, viewing women as simple tools to gain what they wanted, then dropping them whenever they pleased.
No, that was unfair. Angus was not like that man. She had seen the fury in his face when he had threatened the man with death. But still, she didn’t know what to think of him. Every time he got close, she was confused, and then they would end up arguing, and her thinking became even more blurred. Maybe he just wanted to kiss her, and that was it? Maybe he was just a womanizing Scotsman?
She had seen many of them at the Castle’s gatherings, stealing kisses from young maids in the hallways or in the shadows of the Hall. She had heard their comments as she or other women had passed by them, but she had never heard Angus say anything about anyone or seen him talking to another woman in that way. He didn’t have time. His eyes were always on her, watching her wordlessly.
She crossed her arms. Another tear threatened to squeeze out, but she swallowed hard. Well, he would have plenty of time now to carouse with women of the Isle as much as he pleased. She wouldn’t think about him any longer. It was no use. She had her new life to think about. In the background, she could hear Seamus droning on, but she was busy taking in the still scenery that lay around her.
The water was a deep, dark blue, and it looked as smooth as glass as the boat pointed its way to the far shore. Normally a mist hung low in the morning, but with the harsh rains of the last even, the morning was clear and clean. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, hoping to wash away all thoughts of Angus.
She was excited to see her father, after all. They had only each other for such a long time, and even though he did many things that bothered or restricted her, she knew that he loved her, and she loved him very much. At least for a time, she and her father could enjoy each other’s company while she decided in her heart what to do next.
It was not long before they reached the far shore, and Charlotte was met by two British soldiers on the other side. They put their hands behind their backs and bowed low. One of them stepped forward to help Charlotte out of the boat, and Seamus pulled it onto the shore. “Miss Andrews, I am Lieutenant Stevens, and this is Lieutenant Deacon.” He smiled, and Charlotte noticed his handsome face, features sharp, strong, and clean-cut under close-cropped brown hair with a black hat on top.
“Hello,” she said, trying her best to bring back the friendly, flirtatious Charlotte of yore who always knew what to say to young, handsome gentlemen. Both of them were extremely well-formed, their hard bodies evident under their uniforms, but Lieutenant Stevens was the better-looking of the two. The other was blond but younger, not yet grown into his face.
“You may call us David and Lawrence, if it so pleases you, Miss. Your father has sent us to fetch you and help you with your belongings.”
Charlotte wrapped her cloak tighter around her and smiled once more. “Thank you. ‘Tis most appreciated. I hope my things are not too heavy or burdensome for you.” She motioned to them in the boat.
David Stevens smiled, his perfect teeth set in a wide smile. “Not at all, Miss. A woman such as yourself could never be a burden.” Lawrence nodded shyly, and then the two men set to work, with Seamus, pulling in the trunk and other bags and bundles that Charlotte had with her.
Could never be a burden. The words sank into her like a stone in the Sound, and she smiled at the kindness of the words.
At least someone does not think me a burden. She thought to herself and began walking before the men as they carried her belongings towards the Fort, which stood within sight of the Sounds’ shores.
* * *
Later, Angus and Fergus were outside the castle, the sound of swords clanging in the air. Fergus was chuckling, his red curls bobbing as he did so. “What puts such force behind yer swing taeday, Angus?” He dodged a heave of Angus’ sword, which had come over the top of his head.
Angus growled and spun around, trying to unseat his opponent with a swing to the legs, but Fergus merely laughed and jumped out of the way once more. Angus set his teeth and said, “Naething, lad. I have merely too much on my mind at present, and wish tae set it free against yer body with my sword.”
Fergus returned a swing, and their two swords clanged loudly as they met in the middle. Angus pushed him to the ground. At that moment, Fergus’ near copy, Liam, rushed around to where they were and said, “Angus, are ye mad? Why did ye send the lass away?”
Angus paused and turned. His chest felt like it was about to burst, and he didn’t need anyone questioning what had happened. “Ye know naething, lad. I didnae send her away. Her father called for her.”
Liam looked confused, and Fergus watched what was going on from his seat on the ground. “But surely her father would understand that she shouldnae travel after her injury.”
“An injury that ye helped tae inflict with yer carelessness and lack of backbone.” Angus took a step towards Liam, and Fergus jumped up to stan
d between them. He smiled. “What in bloody Hell is going on?”
Angus pulled back. “Mistress Andrews is gone back tae the Fort tae live with her father. He has called her there. Some assistant is coming tae the Fort tae work with him, and she needs tae be present.”
Fergus nodded, digesting the information. “But, she was injured? What happened?”
Liam sighed and looked at Fergus as if he was going to punch him. “Keep up, lad. Last night, I was accompanying the mistress as she visited her patients. Ye knew that I was there. But she fell in the rain and hit her head.”
Fergus nodded again. “Aye, I see. But, now she’s gone.”
“Aye!” Angus yelled, fed up with the conversation. “So, there is nae reason why we must go over it again and again. The lass is gone. She is gone for good! ‘Tis nae matter. She is just a Sassenach come tae visit her cousin. Now that her cousin is nae here, ‘tis no reason for her tae stay among us.”
He turned around and left, unable to contain his anger anymore. Fergus yelled from behind him with mirth in his voice, “Och, so now we see what angers ye this morning, lad!”
Mending a Highland Heart: Healing him was more scandalous than she ever imagined… Page 9