by Moni Boyce
“Close your eyes.”
She shut her eyes at once.
How the hell did he know they were open?
Then another thought occurred.
Oh, my God. I hope he wasn’t reading my thoughts.
Her face flushed, but she kept her eyes closed in case he now had his eyes open. She resumed the deep breathing to help slow her racing heart.
“Remember, deep breaths.” He illustrated by inhaling and exhaling slowly.
She mimicked his breathing pattern. Over twenty minutes into meditating, something happened. Images in her head drifted away. Every event that led to this moment disappeared. Even the thoughts she’d had of tomorrow vanished. Soon the only thing she saw in her head was white space. It was bizarre to have her mind cleared of everything. The sensation didn’t last for long. A flood of visions passed through. An inner voice told her the things she was seeing hadn’t yet taken place. She saw the future, but it was passing in such quick succession she couldn’t get a sense of what it was or what it meant.
Far off she could hear Eli calling her name. Once his voice broke through, she began to lose focus and the images shut off. She opened her eyes and blinked several times.
“I’ve been calling you for a while.”
She gaped at him. “I saw something, but I don’t understand what I saw ... it flashed by in a blur.”
He grabbed her by the shoulders. “What?” His face broke out in a huge grin. The biggest grin she’d seen on him to date. “What did you just say?”
She giggled. “You heard me... it worked.”
He threw his arms around her and they rolled over into the grass. “This is great. You did it.”
She looked up at him. He’d never done that: initiated contact with her. Often, it seemed like he went out of his way to not touch her.
“Yeah... we did it. I couldn’t have accomplished it without you.”
Something in her words sparked some sort of awareness in him, because he removed his body from hers. “I’m sorry.” He stood and wiped the bits of grass and twigs from his pants.
She sat up. “It’s okay.” She reassured him. It was hard not to feel confused. One minute they were laughing and the next he was treating her like she was a leper. Did he find her that repulsive that he always needed to get away from her?
“That’s enough for today. We’ll resume tomorrow.” Eli rushed off without looking in her direction.
She plucked a clump of grass and threw it in frustration. “Ahhhhh!” She yelled at the sky before she dropped back into the grass. Why did she have to have feelings for her snobbish, magical co-worker who wasn’t interested in her? She couldn’t even enjoy the fact she’d just glimpsed the future. In a tantrum, she kicked her heel and banged her fist against the ground. Why did life seem so unfair?
Why do men get to have everything?
For women it’s always one or the other. You can have a great career, but no family. Guess it worked that way in the magical realm too. Powers, but you’re single.
CHAPTER 12
Eli
After he left Willow, he ventured off into the woods. The joy they both felt over her power presenting itself almost caused him to kiss her. He never should have been alone with her. He was playing with fire. If he wasn’t careful, forget about being burned, he would be incinerated.
In his anger, he hurled a fireball at a nearby shrub. It dissolved to black ash and drifted to the ground.
The rest of the day, he stayed out in the woods gathering herbs and practicing spells and incantations.
When he returned in the evening, everyone was sitting around the campfire talking and laughing. He noticed that after two weeks, Zoriana and Mathilda still weren’t speaking. They sat as far away from one another as they could. Between Zoriana’s jaded, unknown past and the slap, Mathilda was dealing with a lot. He needed to rectify the situation tomorrow. Zoriana had secrets, and was entitled to them, but their feud had gone on long enough.
“We were wondering when you’d return?” Mathilda smiled at him when he sat next to her.
“I’m here now cousin.” He gave her a playful nudge and redirected his attention to the others.
“Help us, Eli. I was just telling Willow here that Phaedra thinks she’s an amazing singer. Of course I’ve heard her sing because I used to be her pet, but you, Zoriana and Mathilda haven’t. We’re sitting around a campfire, there should be music.” Max implored.
“Why are you making it sound like I was some fan girl? I said the girl could sing. Many people in Nashville can sing.” Phaedra scowled.
Max grinned as he put his arm around her and pulled her closer before he tickled her side. “C’mon, Eli. Help me convince her. Willow. Willow. Willow.” He began to chant and soon Mathilda and Morgana were chanting right along with him.
When he looked in her direction, she was staring at him. He met her stare. Despite what happened in the meadow he wouldn’t back down. The way her eyes held his suggested her wish and hope was for him to ask her to serenade them. He couldn’t. Knowing it’s what she wanted made him look away.
“Play something for us.” Mathilda begged.
Willow looked sad and disappointed. Without saying a word, she got up and disappeared inside the RV. Several seconds later, she appeared with her guitar in her hands. She took her seat and spent some time tuning the guitar. Everyone watched her in silence.
After taking a beat, she played a few chords and then sang ‘That Old Black Magic.’ Her singing and playing entranced them. She put on a private show just for them. The minute she started to sing, he couldn’t take his eyes from her. Under the moonlight, she was ethereal. What no one knew was he’d stood at the back of many smoky, crowded bars and listened to her. He knew he shouldn’t, but he’d wanted to hear what he’d be depriving the world. He wished she understood the pain it caused him to keep what she so rightly deserved away from her.
After she finished that song she went right into playing The Police’s ‘Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic,’ but she changed ‘she’ in the song to ‘he.’ The more he listened to the lyrics the more uncomfortable he became, and he shifted his seating position several times. When it ended everyone applauded and called out for her to sing more.
“Encore!” Mathilda shouted and cheered. “You’re so good.”
He clapped along so he wouldn’t draw attention to himself, but he wanted to be anywhere, but there at the moment. There was no way he could handle anymore singing tonight. He stood. “Excuse me.”
Inside the RV, he made a beeline for the bathroom. After shutting the door he sat on top of the toilet lid. It wasn’t long before he realized he made a mistake coming in here. She slept here. He shook his head before he dropped it into his hands. When it came to her, he didn’t think clearly. That had to stop. Those kinds of mistakes got people killed. He’d remove himself from the trainings and supervise from afar. Problem solved.
When he exited the bathroom he collided with Willow.
“Sorry.”
“Excuse me.”
They both spoke at the same time.
A quick step back caused him to bang his head against the door, which swung closed behind him. He winced.
“Are you okay?” She reached for him.
“I’m fine.” With nowhere to go, he could only press himself further into the door to avoid her touch.
Her face dropped, and he realized the words came out harsher than they should have. “Sorry, I...”
She put up her hand. “I’m tired. I’m going to bed.” Squeezing past him, she walked into the bedroom and slid the door shut without a backward glance.
For a while, he stood in the same spot and looked at the closed door, wishing that whole exchange had gone differently.
Once he left the motor home, he avoided the others and put his sleeping bag further away from the fire. He punched his pillow to fluff it up, but also out of frustration. Grass and leaves rustled a short while later as someone approached.
> “I thought everyone would have gotten the hint I wanted to be alone.” He still hadn’t seen who was coming in his direction, but he had a good guess. When Zoriana sat, it surprised him.
“You’re not who I expected.” He mumbled, lay back on his pillow and looked at her. “Wanna talk about it?”
Zoriana slid off the log she was sitting on and landed with a plop, onto the dirt-packed ground. She said nothing for several moments, only stared into the distance. “She hates me.”
He sat up and took her hands in his.
“She doesn’t hate you... she just found out that her mother had a life before her, has a past she may not get to learn about... that’s tough for a kid. I think we forget she’s only seventeen.”
“You’re being kind.” She chuckled mirthlessly and looked at their joined hands.
“I shouldn’t have hit her.” Tears clogged her throat.
“No, you shouldn’t.”
“It’s just... you know where that kind of curiosity leads. I had a front-row seat when the rebellion had to be suppressed.” A bitter note marked her words.
He stared into the shadows. That dark time in their coven’s history was still casting a long shadow.
“I know it’s not something that’s talked about, but it might help things between the two of you if you explained that to her.”
Zoriana nodded. A lengthy silence passed between them. She sniffled. “By the way, who did you think I was?”
“Hmm?” He answered absently, his attention elsewhere.
“When I came over here, you mentioned I wasn’t who you were expecting. Who did you think I was?”
Oh that.
“No one. It doesn’t matter.” If he told her, she’d only ask more questions, and he didn’t want to be grilled tonight. For once, Zoriana asked nothing further, too lost in her own troubles.
THE NEXT MORNING, THE escalating, heated argument taking place between Zoriana and Mathilda on the fringes of the camp awoke him. He dragged himself over to the fire in search of caffeine while he rubbed his eyes. Phaedra and Max were eating breakfast and pretending not to listen. His gaze drifted to the motor home, where he assumed Willow was still sleeping or avoiding him or the ugly quarrel that was happening or both.
“Where’s Morgana?” He sipped at the hot coffee. It burned going down his throat, but he welcomed the caffeine that should kick in and wake him up in a few minutes.
“She’s out picking herbs and practicing spells.” Phaedra said the words, but kept her eyes glued on the mother and daughter who didn’t seem to be ending their fight anytime soon.
“Shouldn’t we stop them?” Max looked between Eli and Phaedra concerned.
“No.” They both answered in unison.
“They need to fight.” Eli sipped more coffee and scrounged for breakfast.
“Yeah, let them get out everything between them so we can avoid these awkward conversations where they talk around each other or pass messages. That shit has to stop.” Phaedra resumed eating her food.
Eli smirked at Phaedra’s no-nonsense approach on how to deal with the issue between Zoriana and Mathilda.
Several minutes passed and the angry words died away, replaced by sniffles. Mathilda walked into the woods.
Distress was etched into Zoriana’s face. It was obvious nothing was resolved. He looked elsewhere when she approached to afford her some privacy and give her the illusion they hadn’t just be an audience to yet another blow-up between her and her daughter. It was hard on all of them, seeing the two argue when they were so close. It was strange.
Zoriana reached the fire and sat heavily onto a stump. On their way to the stream to clean their dishes, Phaedra squeezed her shoulder. She patted Phaedra’s hand in thanks.
Before he could say anything, Willow chose that moment to emerge from the motor home. She looked bright-eyed and ready to take charge of her day. Whatever he was about to say to Zoriana was forgotten.
CHAPTER 13
Willow
It was painful hearing the irritation and hostility that volleyed back and forth between Mathilda and Zoriana. Whenever she used to come into the coffee shop, they were always so close. Often she looked at their relationship and wished for the millionth time that her own mother were still alive. The pang she experienced at the widening rift between the two was hard to shake, but when it came to families, she believed you had to let them work it out.
Once she heard the angry stomp of Mathilda’s Dr. Martens, she pushed those feelings to the back of her mind and put on her game face. She was sorry for what Zoriana and Mathilda were going through, but she had to focus on honing her powers so she stood a chance against Killian.
Eli was alone at the fire when she exited the RV.
Great.
The last thing he seemed to want was for the two of them to be unchaperoned. Yes, Zoriana was present, but she wouldn’t be taking part in any conversations, which left her to make awkward conversation with him. She was tired of having her feelings hurt. It was hard not to beat a hasty retreat inside the RV and claim she forgot something.
Don’t be a coward.
She put one foot in front of the other and walked towards them. “Good morning.” She poured herself some coffee. It was no caramel macchiato, but it sufficed.
“Morning.” Eli greeted her, but his eyes were now on Zoriana, who was struggling. The woman offered no greeting; she was hurting and lost in her grief.
“Did you want any breakfast?” He asked her after a couple more minutes of eyeing Zoriana with concern.
She shook her head and continued to nurse her coffee.
“Meet me in the meadow in fifteen.” He walked away after issuing the order.
It looked like they would be alone again today. That’s fine. She could be all business and have laser focus too. It was important to her to master this ‘Oracle’ ability. She told herself that putting her feelings aside for Eli would be a breeze.
Twenty minutes later, she met him in the meadow. He did a decent job at seething without showing it, but not great. It was clear; it pissed him off she was purposefully late. His nostrils flared in agitation and he wouldn’t look at her.
Dropping to the ground, she sat cross-legged in front of him and tried not to simper. It was hard not to let the satisfaction show.
Eli got right down to business. “Close your eyes.” He bit out the words.
She closed her eyes and relaxed her body and centered her thoughts on remembering what she’d done last time to see the flashes of images.
“Deep breaths.” His tone grew softer.
She followed his advice. While she maintained the breathing pattern she tried to clear her mind and became frustrated when it didn’t happen easily.
“Ugh!” Her eyes flew open, and she slapped the grass. “Why can’t this be easier? If I’m the Oracle, why doesn’t this just come naturally?” The whining sounded pathetic even to her own ears, but she couldn’t help the way she felt. Her eyes skittered everywhere and refused to meet his gaze. She knew he was observing her because her cheeks and the tops of her ears burned.
The silence was unbearable, so she peeked at him. Just like she thought, he was watching her. “What?” It was hard not to twist a little attitude around her words.
Still, he said nothing.
She sighed and stared back at him.
“I know you’re anxious for it to happen, but at the beginning it may come in fits and starts... remember for twenty-six years you haven’t tapped into your power. It will take time. Be patient with yourself.” There was no snarkiness or impatience in his tone. He sounded understanding, and it made her feel like a brat.
Lowering her gaze to the ground, she tugged a few blades of grass from the earth and rolled them between her fingers. “How are you so calm?”
“Years of practice.” He smiled. “We don’t come out of the womb knowing how to be witches, it takes study and practice.”
This comment caused her to smile back at him. Some of
the tension left her shoulders.
“Do you want to try again?”
She looked off across the clearing, thinking it over before she returned her gaze to him. “Can I have some time to get my head straight?” Things were going well between them at this moment and she hoped her request for a break wouldn’t upset him.
“Yeah, go on. I’m going to stay here and meditate. Come back in thirty.” He shut his eyes and let out a slow breath like he’d been teaching her.
For a minute she watched him, but then realized it wouldn’t take long before he knew she hadn’t left. If he opened his eyes and caught her staring, he might pull away from her even more. She scrambled to stand up and then walked back to camp.
Once she returned she saw Morgana sitting alone near the fire, sorting through a bunch of wild plants.
“Hey.”
“Hey.” Morgana answered with a grin.
“Where is everyone?” Willow looked around. The place was deserted. She sat on a log nearby.
“Mathilda’s inside the RV, Zoriana is off somewhere.” She searched around like she was trying to remember which direction she headed. “Phaedra and Max are off someplace, probably making out.” She joked, and they both giggled.
“What’s all this?” Willow waved her hand toward the plants and flowers surrounding Morgana.
“Herbs and plants for magic spells. It’s always good to stock up when I have the opportunity.”
Willow nodded.
“Where’s Eli?”
“Oh, he preferred to stay in the meadow and meditate. We‘ll resume my training later. I needed a break.”
Morgana continued to work and a brief silence lapsed between them before she spoke again. “You know, I wanted to apologize for my role in lying to you. We were neighbors and hung out... I know it’s part of the job, but I’m sorry I lied to you.”
The admission surprised Willow and left her speechless. “Um... I appreciate that. Thank you.” She wasn’t sure what to say. “I think I will rest before I have to meet up with Eli again.” The smile on her face seemed false. She appreciated Morgana’s apology, but remembering the life she had before all of this happened was still raw some days. The constant reminder was like having salt poured on an open wound.