by Jenna Brandt
He started to move in towards her again, but before his body came to rest next to hers, Margaret quickly raised a hand and placed it on his chest as she shook her head.
But Pierre ignored her protest and rested his own hand over the top of hers on his chest. He moved into her and placed his other hand under her chin, whispering, “Let me stay, Margaret. I know we both want me to. I do not think I have ever wanted anything more than to be here with you right now.”
Margaret swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat before shaking her head. Firmly she stated, “You need to leave, Pierre.”
Without a word, he turned around to leave.
With his back to her and his hand on the doorknob, Pierre whispered, “I wish you would not push me away.”
And with that, he walked out the door.
Chapter 10
The next morning, Margaret told Jackie of her plans to get a place of her own. She knew her new arrangements would be inferior to her current living conditions, considering her limited resources, but she had imposed on Pierre for far longer than she intended.
“I do not see why you have to move out of Pierre’s estate. He is a perfect gentleman and he will remain so.”
“Yes, Jackie, but I need to do this. It is time for Henry and I to get a place of our own. Pierre has been wonderful these last few months, but things are getting too complicated between us. Besides,” she said as she put the last of her dresses in the trunk, “my temporary stay here in France is turning out to be a permanent one.”
“Well, then, you should move in with me.” Jackie put her arm around Margaret’s shoulder and said, “You are like my sister, and I hate the thought of you staying alone.”
“I hardly think so. I do not want to cramp your style. I know how you love to ‘entertain’ gentlemen. We would just be in the way. Anyhow, we will not be alone because we have Sarah, Albert, and Motty.”
“They are servants. It is different. You need someone of your own kind.”
Margaret chose not to argue the point that Sarah was her oldest friend and had supported her through countless difficult times. Instead, she only said, “I will be sufficient on my own, I promise.”
“Still, I do not think you need to move out.” She paused a moment, then continued, “Have you told Pierre yet?”
Shaking her head as she finished packing, Margaret replied, “No, I did not know how to tell him, and I know he is going to fight me on it.”
“You see, it is that simple. You should stay.”
Turning around, Margaret sighed. “I am moving out and that is final. I will not be far away, and you can come calling any time. You know that.”
“I do and I will.”
“Now I suppose it is time for me to go tell Pierre of my plans. Wish me luck.”
Giving Margaret a supportive hug, Jackie asserted, “Good luck. You are going to need it to convince Pierre.”
As Margaret made her way through Pierre’s estate to tell him of her plans to move out, she thought about what occurred between them the night before, and knew she was making the right decision. Softly, Margaret rapped on the door to Pierre’s study.
“You may enter.”
Pierre looked up from the stack of papers in front of him on his desk as Margaret entered the room. The sullen look on his face was immediately replaced by a look of cheerfulness.
“Why, this is a welcome surprise. To what do I owe the honor of your presence this morning, Margaret?”
She tightened her lips in worry before saying, “I have something to talk to you about that I feel cannot wait for a later time.”
With a hopeful tone, Pierre asked, “Have you changed your mind about us?”
“On the contrary. Due to what has transpired between us, I find it sagacious that I remove myself from your estate immediately.”
Standing up, Pierre came around to the front of his desk. The strain on his face was palpable. It was obvious he was trying to keep his emotions under control.
“If this is because of last night, Margaret, I give you my word that it will never happen again unless you want it.”
“I admit, last night is a part of why I am leaving, but there are many more reasons why I must move out beyond what happened.”
He took her chin in his hand and pulled her face up, making her eyes meet his own. “Give me one legitimate reason as to why you should leave, Margaret.”
“Pierre, we both know it is indecent for me to be here in the first place. I am a widow, and I should not be staying with an unwed man. When I was staying here in secret, it was one thing because no one was aware, but now that I have started to circulate in French society, it is not seemly. Even though nothing is going on between us, no one else knows that.”
Looking at her meaningfully, he asked, “Is there nothing going on between us?”
Pulling free from his grasp, Margaret replied, “Of course, there is nothing going on.”
Margaret glanced at him and saw his utter look of devotion for her on his face. No matter what she did, he was not going to back down. Unless… she hated that it came to this, but she realized now that the only way she was going to make him let her go was if she drove him out of her life. If he knew the truth about her past in all the gory details, that would be the end of it. Preparing herself to ruin his idealistic images of her, she said softly, “If you really knew me and what I’ve done in my past, Pierre, you would realize why we cannot be together.”
“What? What have you done that is so terrible that I will no longer want you?”
“I told you about my past and how the Duke of Witherton used me to hurt Henry. What I did not tell you is that before I was married to Henry, I had thought myself in love with the duke. He pursued me, and I let him even though I was betrothed to Henry.”
He stood up and reached out quickly, taking her into his arms before she knew what was happening. “It is not going to work, you trying to persuade me that you are a bad person. I know you, Margaret, and you are one of the kindest and most trustworthy people I know. You will not get rid of me that easily.”
Pierre dipped his head down and allowed his mouth to hover just inches from Margaret as he whispered against her skin, “Tell me you do not want me to kiss you, and I will stop.”
She knew she should object, but she could not offer up the words. Somehow Pierre made it impossible for her to think clearly once he touched her.
As he seized her lips with his own, her mind said to pull away quickly, but her heart betrayed her. He was right; when he touched her, it was like a wildfire being lit.
Knowing she needed to put an end to this, she pushed against his chest and broke free of his embrace. Stepping back, she said, “That is the reason that I must leave.” Margaret turned and fled the room.
Chapter 11
After enjoying a delicious dinner at one of the local restaurants, Margaret was drinking a dessert port while sitting next to the marquis. They were accompanied by Monte and Jackie, who had gotten into a fight the previous night but made up later the same evening. Honestly, it was hard for Margaret to keep track of when they were seeing each other and when they were not. Their “relationship” was constantly shifting.
At the current moment, Margaret watched the other couple nestled in a corner of the room, engaged in an intimate lovers’ conversation. For all the potential volatility in their relationship, Margaret still envied the passion. From her experience, it did not seem possible to have both stability and passion coexist without it erupting. Jackie was the complete opposite of Margaret when it came to what she wanted in a relationship. She would forgo stability for passion, while Margaret needed stability above all else for her son’s sake.
Margaret turned her attention back to the marquis and broke the silence. “My lord, we have been spending considerable time together. I think it is about time that you meet my son. Would you care to go for a walk with us in the park?”
The marquis stared at Margaret for several seconds, revealing no
thing on his face, before saying, “I find that suggestion… agreeable.”
The pause in his response did not lend Margaret to believe he was enthusiastic about her invitation. Did he not want to meet her son and get to know him? If he were to wed Margaret, he would become Henry’s father by marriage. She hoped he would want to take an active role in the boy’s life. Did he view it as just another step towards reaching his goal of winning her hand? She did not want him to view marrying her as return on an investment but as the prize for making the effort in getting to know her.
“If you feel it too soon, we can delay it, or postpone such an interaction altogether.”
He furrowed his brows together in confusion. “I thought I was clear. I am not opposed to meeting your son.”
Margaret tried to disguise her frustration, but she found it hard to communicate with the marquis at times. One moment, he was engrossed in her, and the next, he seemed distant. He was disconnected from her in a way she could not explain. Was she forcing something that was not there?
“Would tomorrow afternoon be agreeable? Say around two o’clock?”
“I will be there.”
She watched the marquis as the next course of the meal was placed before them. He seemed especially distracted, as if something was keeping him for concentrating on their time together.
It was unlike Margaret to be so forward, but she needed to understand what was going on with him and why he detached from her. “My lord, is something amiss? You seem preoccupied this eve.”
The marquis focused his attention on her and, as if seeing her for the first time all evening, reached out and patted the side of her arm. “I am sorry. There has been a situation that I have been dealing with for a considerable amount of time, and today it escalated.”
How vague. She asked him a direct question and he gave her an answer that only created more questions. What situation, and who did it involve? She wondered if he had a mistress. It was not uncommon for noblemen to have one, and she would not be surprised if that were the case. She did not like it, but they were not engaged. Presently, she did not have a right to be upset about it.
“I am sorry to hear that, Lord Robineau. Perhaps I can help if you discuss the details with me.”
He adamantly shook his head. “As I said, I have been dealing with this particular situation for a substantial time. Discussing it will not change anything.”
Secrets. Just like the duke, just like Henry. Why did every man she became involved with keep secrets from her? As Margaret was about to object, a server entered the room and came over to them. He handed the marquis a folded piece of paper, which he in turn opened and hastily read.
The marquis quickly glanced up at Margaret and stated with trepidation in his voice, “I have an urgent matter to which I must attend. I am sorry for my brash departure, but it cannot wait.”
The marquis rose to his feet, nodded towards Margaret, and exited the room.
Shocked by the marquis’s uncharacteristic frazzled behavior, Margaret sat still and considered what just occurred. What was going on that would cause him to act in such a way?
Monte came over to where Margaret sat and looked at the empty seat next to her. “Where did my brother go?”
“He did not say. He received a note and left abruptly. You would not happen to know what matter caused such alarm, would you?”
Monte turned ghostly pale and said, “I need to be going as well.”
Margaret watched as the younger brother rushed out after the other. What would cause both men to act that way? The marquis was altruistic, but she had never seen Monte care about anything that did not give him pleasure. It seemed peculiar that both men would act in such a manner.
Jackie approached Margaret and asked, “What in the devil got into those Robineau brothers?” It seemed something tied both men together that neither she nor Jackie was aware of.
“I do not know, but I intend to find out.”
The park was picturesque with the green grass and trees and the flowers in bloom. Many Parisians were out, strolling along the walking paths that weaved through the park’s natural splendor. Margaret remembered reading about the construction of the new parks and boulevards when Napoleon III became emperor. Jean-Charles Adolphe Alphand had designed the parks to accommodate both horseback riders and walkers along the paths, making promenading one of the new favorite pastimes for city dwellers.
Looking down at Henry in his baby carriage, Margaret gently adjusted the blanket around his body. He had been fast asleep for the past hour, as the motion from the constant rolling lulled him to slumber.
She had reached the place where the marquis was supposed to meet her. It was fifteen past two, and he was never late. What was keeping him?
Margaret fluffed out and arranged the crinoline of her soft blue velvet dress as she sat on one of the park benches that adorned the walking paths. She watched as the many families, couples, and groups of friends strolled past her. They all seemed so happy, decked out in their finest outfits and enjoying one another’s company. At times, she felt she was just like them, but underneath her content exterior, something always seemed like it was missing.
“Good afternoon, Lady Margaret.”
She looked up to see the marquis standing next to her. “Would you care to take a walk with me?”
“Yes, my lord.” She extended her hand to the marquis, who took it and helped her to her feet. Margaret waved Sarah over and handed the baby carriage to her.
“Henry is asleep. When he wakes up, please bring him back to us so that I may introduce him to Lord Robineau.”
“Of course, my lady.”
The marquis took Lady Margaret’s hand and placed it in the crook of his arm, saying, “I wanted to apologize again for what occurred last night, Lady Margaret. I did not want to leave you in the fashion I did.”
“Did everything resolve with the situation?”
He nodded. “Temporarily.”
“You mean it will happen again?”
“Unfortunately.”
She felt as if they were talking around a subject she did not have enough knowledge about to understand. It was uncomfortable, and she did not like it.
“My lord, do you trust me?”
He looked over at her and smiled. “Assuredly.”
“Then why will you not tell me what is going on with your situation?” She did not expect to be so direct with the marquis, but she was tired of allowing him to be evasive.
“It is more complex than you can imagine.”
“I want you to know you can confide in me without apprehension. I am an excellent secret keeper.”
“I appreciate your sincerity, and I do believe you. However, the situation does not involve me alone.”
His circumstance involved someone else. She had previously wondered if he had a mistress. He did not seem the type, but one could never know. She hoped it was not the case, because depending on the depth of the relationship, it could pose a potential problem for her down the road. She did not want to enter a marriage where she was competing with another woman for the rest of her life. There was also the possibility that he had an illegitimate child. It was more common than revealed in their social circles. Did he think she could not love another woman’s child? She hoped he knew she would care for anyone who was important to the marquis.
They walked in silence until Sarah approached them with the baby carriage. “My lady, Henry is awake now. Would you like me to get him out for you?”
Margaret shook her head. “No, I can manage myself, Sarah. Please, wait for us over by the bench.”
“Of course, my lady.”
Henry smiled as Margaret’s face came into view. She lifted the small boy out of the carriage and turned him to face the marquis.
“May I introduce to you Lord Henry Wellesley.”
Breaking the formality of the moment, Henry giggled and swatted at the marquis’s nose. The marquis’s eyes grew wide with surprise, and as he looked from the ba
by to Margaret, a giant grin crossed his face. They all began to laugh.
Margaret turned Henry back towards her and said, “You adorable boy. Do you know how much I love you? More than all the stars in the sky.” She tried to place Henry back in the baby carriage, but he would have none of it. His little head popped up over the edge with both his hands on either side of his face. He peered out over the side and he wrinkled his nose up in a tiny tooth-exposing grin. He dropped his head down again, and a few moments later, his little head popped up once more.
“Are you wanting to play peek-a-boo, Henry?”
Bending down, Margaret covered her eyes with her hands, waited several seconds, then cracked one side, and Henry faintly laughed. She cracked the other side and he giggled harder. She swiftly pulled both hands away and his whole little body shook with amusement.
“Do you think you two are the only ones who know how to play this game? I used to play it all the time with my brother and sister,” the marquis confessed.
He bent down and went through the same pattern with the baby. Henry was skeptical of the stranger at first, but after the second attempt, the marquis received the same results as Margaret.
“You are wonderful with him, my lord. It does my heart good to see you interact so well with him. You mentioned playing games with your siblings. I knew you had a brother, but I was unaware you had a sister.”
“Yes, though unfortunately, she is no longer with us.”
“Oh, I am so sorry. I did not mean to pry.”
“You did not. It was I who mentioned her. It is hard for me sometimes to accept that she is gone. The three of us were tremendously close before she left us. You see, I was the oldest and took care of my younger siblings after our parents died.”
It explained so much about the marquis’s personality and why he always seemed to be taking care of Monte. Monte was the only family the marquis had left, and he must feel responsible for him. The loss of a parent was difficult, but the loss of a sibling was unique beyond comparison.